Don't forget the sandwhich!

:: 2003 21 January :: 2.29pm
:: Mood: complacent

panic is setting in...slowly but surely...

jedibumblebee

:: 2003 20 January :: 6.35pm

stupid laundry, hurry up! I want to go HOME!

jedibumblebee

:: 2003 20 January :: 6.33pm
:: Mood: chipper
:: Music: no music....stupid family computer

i got new pants, do dodo do do... i like pants. the next best thing to new shoes. other than boots. mmmm....boots...

jedibumblebee

:: 2003 19 January :: 10.15pm
:: Mood: happy

you realize, you're changing all of my perceptions of everything. i'm loving it, i really am. i dont know what else to say. you really keep my spirits up.

:: 2003 19 January :: 1.34am
:: Mood: sleepy
:: Music: Hands down-dashboard

"tomorrows a new day"

snow is now falling
The wind is bitter cold
Memorys ofwarm summer nights
Everything seemed to be simple then

No matter how bad this may seem to be
If your still here things will be ok
Its only one more trial
Anything worth anything isnt easy

These times arnt bad
They are just trying
The summer will come again
and the memorys will become now

No matter how bad this may seem to be
If your still here things will be ok
Its only one more trial
Anything worth anything isnt easy

Things will be good again
So dont give up yet
Tomorrows a ne day
But i never said it will be esay

:: 2003 18 January :: 11.52pm
:: Music: bsc-possesions

Most of the time i have found that rarely ever is it only one persons falt normaly both parties contribute.

3 Raise and Ruin | Crash Test

:: 2003 18 January :: 1.53am

"Winter Nights"
My hands are dry(my face is Ruff)
The air is cold (no ones here)
I run my hands through my hair( no one cares)
Where Do you Stand

Who will tell me its ok
Will i be pushed down
Or im i on my own
Will some on let me know

Its for your own good
Lifes not fair(so tell someone who cares)
I hope thats This will pass
I wont be destroyed by this

Who will tell me this is ok
Will i be picked up
are you there
Please tell me you are(please tell me you are)
I need Someone (anyone)
Be there for me(please be there for me)(for me)

:: 2003 18 January :: 1.23am
:: Mood: like it matters

I'm fine
here is the newest song i've writen
Im fine
evryone esle sees it but me
But i dont know what to do
IS it anger
IS it sadness
OR maybe im just scared

Every Day the world changes
Its to fast to keep up
So many people to please
but where to start
No matter where i start its wrong

Another sleepless Night
My minds to full to sleep
Dont have time to count sheep
I have battles coming from all sides
When ones done 2 more start
At this rate i wont last the night

Every Day the world changes
Its to fast to keep up
So many people to please
but where to start
No matter where i start its wrong

I want this story to end good
but the pages keep falling out
Who am i kidding
im not winning even if i did
the battle grounds are always left in ruins

:: 2003 18 January :: 1.21am
:: Mood: like it matters

im fine

evryone esle sees it but me
But i dont know what to do
IS it anger
IS it sadness
OR maybe im just scared

Every Day the world changes
Its to fast to keep up
So many people to please
but where to start
No matter where i start its wrong

Another sleepless Night
My minds to full to sleep
Dont have time to count sheep
I have battles coming from all sides
When ones done 2 more start
At this rate i wont last the night

Every Day the world changes
Its to fast to keep up
So many people to please
but where to start
No matter where i start its wrong

I want this story to end good
but the pages keep falling out
Who am i kidding
im not winning even if i did
the battle grounds are always left in ruins

:: 2003 17 January :: 11.28pm
:: Music: BRUCE SAID CHECKERS-FALL

stuff
This week hasnt been the best and this morning really suck. But things are looking up.I fainaly was able to talk to jess to night for a like 20 minutes wich helped a lot. Dusty and i played an acustic verion of fast moving dumptruck at the bean after fuzzy logic it was fun i beat dusty in chess but thats because he has stinky breath. Oh yeah Im listening to bsc right now wich is freaking awesome!!!!!!! yeah!!!!! AND WE PLAY AT THE BEAN ON FEB 8th im not sure what time but i will keep you posted and every one should check us out HECK YEAH FOR BSC
well thats all for now to ends on a good note

:: 2003 17 January :: 7.35pm

hm...

What Self-Mutilation Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

:: 2003 14 January :: 10.57am
:: Mood: moody

i always need words
to define my situations
to make sure that its all real
and not just a sequence of dreams

i'm not sure what is really happening here.
i'm ready to panic
ready to run
and my brain moves
one million miles a minute.

can you take it
when nothing i say or do makes sense?

i dont really understand the word "relationship".
i'm not any good with definitions.
the only thing
i've figured out
thus far
is that when you call someone your "boyfriend" or "girlfriend"
you are giving them
sole
explicit
permission
to hold your hand.

1 Raise and Ruin | Crash Test

:: 2003 13 January :: 9.33pm
:: Mood: scared
:: Music: Fuel- Shimmer

She says that love is for fools who fall behind...
i cant do it i cant do it i cant do it i cant do it.........

please please please just let me go. i'm not worth it...i'm not worth it

2 Raise and Ruin | Crash Test

:: 2003 13 January :: 4.22pm
:: Mood: confused
:: Music: Randy McClain- My Understanding of Everything :)

Can we forget everything that makes sense?
I don't understand anything
Can we go to tomorrow
Thinking, thinking this way
Will we live in sorrow
Or will I forever pray
Trees will never be forgotten anyway
Tomorrow looks the same to me
Tomorrow�s in my way
And it happened way too fast
Hello, goodbye, you're in the past
And can we forget
Everything that makes sense
And one day we'll find
Everything turned out just right
Last night I watched the stars
They never look the same
It kind of reminds me of me
And the meaning in my name
I will one day be forgotten anyway
Tomorrow kills me
Tomorrow's in my way
And it happened
Way too fast
Hello, goodbye, you're in the past
And can we forget
Everything that makes sense
And one day we'll find
Everything turned out just right
Tell me why I�m getting tired of everything
And all the words that would mean nothing
This is my understanding of everything
Everything that means nothing