I graduated tonight. I never ever thought I'd make it through, but here I am. I'm so overwhelmed with emotion and it all seems so surreal.
Highschool gave me some of the best and worst years of my life, not to mention the unforgettable expierneces as well as ups and downs. The past four years have been the most crucial in helping me become the person I am now. Right now I don't really know what to think. I'm scared, I'm happy, and above all I am so proud of myself, and it feels amazing.
I've been stressed to the max the past few weeks, even though it may not show. It's drastically affected my sleeping patterns though.
I also haven't been able to cry, which is deffinatly the strangest thing for me. All I want to do is just break down and let out all this emotion, but no matter what I do or how hard I try I just can't do it. I get teary eyed once in awhile but still have yet to shed a tear, which is suprising considering I thought I would ball my eyes out at grad, but I'm sure it will come eventually.
I'm so glad that it's all over with. All thats left is the grad dinner dance on Saturday which I'm stoked for.
Other than that theres a lot I could write about but I'm exhausted.
Me and Greg drove up to Lake Cowichan on Sunday, we didn't leave until 3 in the aftenoon, so we only stayed up there for a little bit. I met his Grandma and she is so nice and cute! I also met his Uncle Dave who is also really nice. I've been having lots of fun with Greg, I love just being with him he makes me really happy. And once again he is someone I can be with but I don't feel like I need to spend all my time with him, he has his own life and I have mine, and that really makes me value our time together even though we do spend a fair amount of time together.
Anyways, I'll have to try and update more regularly, it's just been really busy lately.
Worked Thursday, Friday & Saturday.
Saturday went to Jason's and watched UFC with Greg, Jason and Johnathon. Then they all went to see the strippers and I hung out with Kisa. Then we picked Brett and Greg up from the bar and stayed at Bretts and didn't get home until 5:30. Slept till 1, took Kisa home and hung out with Greg. We played frisbee and went to my cousins then went and hung out around his house, and sat on this huge rock, it was really nice. I love spending time with him.
The Story
We always knew that my great (great?) uncle was on the Titanic. My grandmother (and my mother) always told us about how he survived by dressing up as a woman and sneaking on a lifeboat. Not honorable but hey, he was third class, he wouldn't have survived anyway. And that sums up my grandmother's side of the family.
Anyway. Back when the Ellis Island website first became searchable and the manifest of the Titanic was not searchable, my mom spent a week searching for him. She found him on the Carpathia as one of the survivors. She couldn't find him at Ellis Island but when she finally figured out that someone dated all the papers three months ahead, she found him there.
But he was never on the official list of Titanic survivors. She searched and searched and looked and looked. She told me about how she started looking for him as a little girl but could never find him.
Well Titanic was on last night and I thought, hey, let's just try to look for him. And I went on Encyclopedia Titanica and looked at every page. No Philip Zennie on the lifeboats, no Philip Zennie in third, second or first class. I called my mom and told her that Titanic had inspired me to find him and we looked together. I got really excited because the site had biographies for every survivor. But we still couldn't find him. I sorted the survivors by age.
This is why we can't have nice things
GTA IV has gotten to that point of no return that all GTA games eventually reach: Rachel can't beat this goddamn mission and therefore will never get any farther in this game ever. Many controllers were slammed around and curses were shouted. Then I looked at gamefaqs and it just said shoot the guys. I CANNOT SHOOT THEM, I AM DEAD. BUT THANK YOU, STUPID WALKTHROUGH MAN.
So I am watching Titanic. I hate this movie. Ugh. Time to change the channel. Okay, I guess I will watch Love Sick: Secrets of a Sex Addict. Oh, Lifetime. Why do you make me watch these terrible, terrible movies?
Trapped in the Closet
Now I know this is OFN (and I'm behind by two years) but did you know that there are now TWENTY-TWO CHAPTERS of Trapped in the Closet?
And that you can watch all of them online at (for some crazy reason) ifc.com?
And did you know that if you get confused, there's a character map?
I didn't know. And my life was forever changed.
I was watching from chapter 11 on but decided to start all over again because it was just so good the first five times.
Sorry, guys. I was just happy this said I wasn't from Michigan. Eat that, stupid friends!
What American accent do you have?
Your Result: The Midland
"You have a Midland accent" is just another way of saying "you don't have an accent." You probably are from the Midland (Pennsylvania, southern Ohio, southern Indiana, southern Illinois, and Missouri) but then for all we know you could be from Florida or Charleston or one of those big southern cities like Atlanta or Dallas. You have a good voice for TV and radio.
Went to Grans and Gramps for lunch yesterday. It was nice.
Then I hung out with Catherine a bit, I'm glad she moved back here :)
Then hung out with Greg, and he met all three of my cousins.
It feels like hes really skeptical about our relationship working out, which sucks.
But I guess only time will tell.
I really like him, hes just differnt than the people I'm use to.
My mom was talking about how my grandpa might have to go for chemo, and I just started crying. I can't picture him losing all his hair and stuff. I hope everything is going okay, I've been trying to just not worry until we know more, but it's difficult.
It's also bringing up a lot of memories of my aunt.
So. Season finales for shows this season? Kind of very lame.
The season finale of Bones is stricken from my world. Like the last Harry Potter book, it never happened.
And House? Really? I didn't like her but...really?
The Office was better than the last couple episodes. But Jim and Pam were supposed to get engaged! I was upset. Until the very end.
Anyway, lame.
I am ill and hoping to recover tomorrow so I can go to work but I am feeling completely awful. I am going to have to go to work and just be useless I guess.
I want a milkshake.
Bleh.
I love you all.
P.S. IRL, life has been lame. Father of kid who used to work with us died. Father of blogger I like is really sick. Laura is gone and I really need her.
P.P.S Oh and I am a bridesmaid now. Which is not lame but awesome. Pumped, I am.
Work on Saturday sucked balls. It was so busy and seemed to drag on forever.
After work Jada and I decided to take off camping. So we packed up and headed out.
It didn't take long because we only went to goldstream and we were there by 8:30. The only campsite left was a double so we were sharing it with other people, and they arrived shortly after us. They were German and didn't speak English well, and they stayed in there RV the entire time, why would you pay $24.00 to just sit in your RV.
Anyways we set everything up and got a nice little fire going, and I just felt so accomplished... until I locked the keys in the trunk of the car. At first I didn't know weather to cry or laugh, so I laughed. And we walked down to the ranger station but there was really nothing they could do. I called my mom but she had been drinking and couldn't bring me the spare keys, so fortunatly my neighbour was home and was able to get up to get me them, so things could have been a lot worse.
That night we went to be around 12:30 after chillin around the fire.
We got up at 8:30, which is pretty early for me, but we got up and ate and went to Goldstream park. We walked around there and went down to the nature hut and it was all good. Then we walked back and were gonna hike Mt.Finlayson but decided against it after running up like 100 of these hella steep stairs. It was pretty dope though.
We headed back to our campsite and it was only 10:45. So we made lunch and sat around the fire, then I had a little nap.
We smoked some weed and just chilled.
A lot of little funny things kept happening. And the entire time it felt like such a good expierence, cause I've never been camping without my family before. But I also felt like this wierd sense of confusion but in a funny way.
It was all good so we decided to stay for another night. Well it was about 11:30 and we had sat around the rest of the day and I looked over and saw the biggest spider I have ever seen in my life, the thing was masive, so being me I freaked and was screaming and Jada wouldnt kill it so I tried to but it got away, and it ran off towards our tent. Well I'm hella terrified of spiders so I refused to sleep in the tent, so we hauled all our shit out of the tent and into the car and were going to sleep there. Then our new camping neighbours rolled up and started a fire and were getting all settled, I have no clue why you would show up at like 11:30 at night but oh well.
I couldn't sleep and I was pretty cranky, which made Jada cranky. So finally I just took down the tent and we drove home. I know that sounds so pathetic but oh well. I had a really good time, it was so chill up there and I was so carefree for the most part.
I also only got hurt twice! I cut my finger but I can barely notice it now. And I dropped the cooloer lid on my thumb and it cut all underneath the nail and bruised it, it actually really really hurts.
Other than that it's all good. And all the park ranger people were so nice! The weather was pretty decent to :) And I thought about Greg a lot whiles I was up there.
Other than camping I totally forgot I have a provincial on Tuesday, so I think I'm hella fucked for that. I'll have to study my ass off.. or just wing it and if I fail i'll have to take it again.
It's weird cause last month at this time I was in Vancouver, and it's just weird that I've gone on little trips around the same time each month. I like it though, it always clears my head and helps me focus, even though this camping thing was only a day.
