plainmornings
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2002 25 July :: 12.58am
tonight was loads of fun! sooo many people in the woohu chat!! Made some new friends which was cool & Jenna found me a new emo boy lol <3<3
HI MATT!!! heh. & Teresa! and Josh ... yeah.
Things are pretty much back to normal.. cept according 2 that stupid personality thing i'm guna go kill myself or something.. Vivi, antisocial?!? NOOO!!! sleep! good night <3
2 lovers |
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2002 24 July :: 10.44pm
Michiganders... how stupid sounding :0P hehe us Floridians are FAR cooler then EVERYONE! ah. well not really but :0) heh.
Michigander.. have fun 2nite.. i'm glad we straightened things out and such.. i really missed you <3
2 lovers |
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2002 24 July :: 8.42pm
o boy... is this telling me something??? lol
3 lovers |
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2002 24 July :: 6.21pm
Suddenly I feel very much relieved... Communication... what happens when there is none ::sigh:: almost 100% better now though... no more hurt, no more crying.
u.o.y.k.n.a.h.t
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2002 23 July :: 9.30pm
its all so mechanical,
i almost wish you could see the tears streaming down my face,
god it hurts so bad,
i can't make it stop
-stop stomping on my heart...
suddenly i recall memories of why i don't give my heart away,
have i began paving my own path of destruction?
how can i fix this situation
how can i fix my heart...
3 lovers |
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2002 23 July :: 9.24pm
waiting is what hurts... i wish you'd understand... i know you can't, i don't know how... maybe i'm just selfish...
s.t.r.u.h.s.i.h.t
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2002 23 July :: 9.06pm
as i sit here and tear my heart out, where are you.. why aren't you holding me like you always promised you would... why have you left me here alone.. what have i done to you, why do i deserve this... i hate you for doing this to me... i hate myself for letting it get like this... why can't you just love me...
rambling. seems as if thats all i ever do. Confusion hits like a tornado... I begin to question myself, what do i really want? yes. It has taken a 3rd party to make me realize how confused i truly am. My poor heart is being torn in all directions..yesterday.. i thought i knew what i wanted and yet today i am once again lost. Make my decisions for me for my indecisiveness will forever be the root of all failure.. my failure.
e.m.p.l.e.h
on a lighter note... Craig (camp director) pulled Zach and I out today & told us that we were the best counselors in the camp!!! go us!! heh. That really made my day... Zach and I make a pretty kick ass team :0)
after a bit of reluctance I gave him my #... he hasn't called but I'm beginning to think that wasn't such a good idea...
1 lover |
i love susan.
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sendmemoney
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2002 22 July :: 11.47pm
:: Mood: fucked up on kava ... what is that called ?
:: Music: desaparecidos - $$$$
*~ love has taught me nothing but bitterness and remorse, and i wish i could have learned a different lesson. but instead i learned that fairy tale beginnings always take a wrong turn and you end up wondering how you did not see it from the start. and you wish the worst on somebody that, even just hours ago, you would have died for. the good part ? you get a few good journals. and you think you learned from your mistakes. but then that same special someone slips into your mind and you know that it would be stupid of you to fall back into their clutches but you can't resist and you end up torn between your head and your heart. and you think you may have broken their heart, but they had you fooled, because it was your heart that got broken.~*
tomorrow maybe i will take this down but i love the kava writings that seem brilliant one night and crappy the next sober morning. bye. *
3 lovers |
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2002 22 July :: 7.48pm
"It's now 2:45 and I'm feeling all adventurous and I just wanted to just throw some caution to the wind and say that... I think I love you."
The only thing that scares me more about this is... I very much think that I feel the same way...
...uoy.evol.i
2 lovers |
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2002 22 July :: 7.06pm
today... was a GOOD day!!! :D heh. First day as a camp counselor for Camp Invention. My partner in crime (the other 3rd grade counselor) Zach and I had such a good time today. Yes. Zach and I are the counselors for the Zeppelin group (3rd grade) we have a group consisting of 23 boys and 5 girls... the kids have absolutely no attention span and i swear, they don't know how to shut up! Despite how bad our kids are Zach and I had such a great time! For just meeting in a day we really hit it off.. you would never guess that we'd never met eachother before today :0) This week might not be so bad afterall heh. Good stuff.. anyways.. had a t-bone sectional today, loads of fun :0) we played for a lil while then got food and stuff. We are now up to 7 t-bones!!! Made me beary excited heh.
Twister 10: I am a Tbone chick. Hear me roar.
heh. Jessica's sooo funny... ohhhh look at the ideas for the t-bone shirts this year
1. BONERS... its not our fault ours are over a foot long
2. T-bones.. we do it in 7 positions!
3. ahh.. i forget lol
Cast your vote!!
2 lovers |
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2002 22 July :: 12.48am
There's a song that's inside of my soul.
It's the one that I've tried to write over, and over again.
I'm awake in the infinite cold.
But you sing to me over, and over, and over again.
So I lay my head back down.
And I lift my hands and pray.
To be only yours I pray.
To be only yours.
I know now, you're my only hope.
Sing to me the song of the stars.
Of your galaxy dancing and laughing, and laughing again.
When it feels like my dreams are so far.
Sing to me of the plans that you have for me over again.
So I lay my head back down.
And I lift my hands and pray.
To be only yours I pray.
To be only yours.
I know now, you're my only hope.
I give you my destiny.
I'm givin' you all of me.
I want your symphony, singing in all that I am.
At the top of my lungs, I'm givin' it back.
So I lay my head back down.
And I lift my hand and pray.
To be only yours I pray.
To be only yours I pray.
To be only yours.
I know now, you're my only hope.
2 lovers |
i love susan.
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sendmemoney
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2002 21 July :: 10.37pm
:: Mood: i think 'longing' should be a mood
:: Music: bright eyes - a perfect sonnet
Your hand on my cheek
tongue in cheek but
my heart stops beating for
one second
that You are smiling at me
and i live off that for
two weeks
that i didn’t see You and
i don’t think
You really noticed but You say
You did so i will
lie to myself for the
tenth time
tonight that You catch me
getting caught up
in Your stare but
please tell me You don’t
mind.
even when You don’t
mean it.
i will
always
believe You
even when i know
we will
Never
be.
3 lovers |
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2002 20 July :: 3.08am
after all that airport hell, I am home. Happy to be here although i miss all my new friends soo much. The trip was overall really fun despite the little issues. Vince and I resolved our fight to only start another 4hrs prior to my leaving (3am Greek time!) It was sad when i left.. We cried, Jenn & Alicia were balling like crazy and it was sad. The guys all came out (all guys minus Vince<- with good reason.) when we were leaving, it was sad.. lots of tears and pictures and hugs and promises to keep in touch. The Athens airport was pretty busy for 3am.. crazy. we flew to Frankfurt, Germany where we split with the Texas kids (that was sad too) Vinh and I managed to get ourselves lost but soon found the gate. The flight was long and delayed by 30min. We finally arrived in JFK airport(NY) 8 hrs later. That was horrible. We got VERY lost and were aimlessly roaming around the never ending airport. Finally we got to the gate and thats when the waiting began. we got there at 1:30pm. Our flight to Ft.Lauderdale was at 5:45pm. We were waiting there and I heard an announcement over the loud speaker saying that Ft.Laudy passengers could switch to an earlier West Palm Beach flight if they wished. I went right up and changed my ticket. Yes. Now 5:25 pm to West Palm Beach. Due to crappy weather the plane was delayed until 5:55pm <- not bad considering the Ft.Laudy plane was delayed from 5:45 to 7:40 <- ouch! yes well. we boarded the plane around 6:00pm. Late. O well, earlier the Ft.Laudy. This is when hell part deux struck. Crappy weather plus runway traffic.. we sat on the plane from 6pm-9:30pm when we finally took off. I was asleep by then. My cell phone battery died so i went to bed. Fun. Well arrived in the WPB airport at 11:55pm. Good to be home. its now 3:15am and I can't sleep. Figures right?
...disappointed you weren't on...
1 lover |
i love susan.
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sendmemoney
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2002 18 July :: 2.02pm
:: Mood: confused
:: Music: rocking horse winner - tomorrow
Heart was broken on the floor and
You stepped on it
You can’t get back something
That you crushed
Crumbled into tiny pieces and now you
Just want to tape it back together
To display on your wall of achievements
But it will never be the same
There will always be the cracks
Filled with glue but still blatantly obvious
For that heart has been forever changed
And I will never be the same
We will never be the same.
5 lovers |
i love susan.
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plainmornings
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2002 15 July :: 2.35pm
sooo much drama.. everyones mad at everyone else. Vince and I are no longer talking. Fun. O well. lots to tell.. lots of pics to post!
4 lovers |
i love susan.
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