::
2003 3 August :: 12.30 am
:: Mood: crappy
:: Music: Manazashi no Aria
Sit. Good dog. // le crise de conscience //
Oi vey... I say that too much too nowadays. I'm not even Jewish, nor know a bit of Hebrew, so I don't really have a right in saying it...
Right now I'm suppose to be in a chatroom talking to people... But I've decided against that from the sole facts that: I don't know three people there and one I can't stand the site of. As for the rest of them...they can live without me. And then there is always the factor that my computer is freezing on and off again. Trying to type in chat rooms just makes this computer go slower, which, then has a better chance to freze again. So I sit. And sit... o_o; If some people only knew what I really thought about them. Wow. You know, I probably shouldn't be posting that, but the people who know me well enough to know what I think of them shouldn't think about that twice.
...I don't know why I bother going to those kind of chats where I don't know half the people there. I never talk. o_o; I wonder why I'm even invited half the time. Out of pity? Maybe. u_u
The chatroom goes accordingly:
-I'd come in.
-I'll say hi.
-People say hi back.
-End.
...Proof once more that I live a life of utter ennui. The most interesting conversation I've held was about Cinderella this whole week. That right there is pretty self-explanatory...
So as my friends and some other people who I could care less about have a "jolly 'ol time" in a chatroom behide this site I'm covering myself from, I sit. Sit, and talk to myself. x_x I feel like one of those little girls you see sitting in the corner of a party just watching as everyone sips their beer and laughs. And when you hear laughter, a string breaks inside you because if you didn't know any better, you'd think that they were laughing at you. Can anybody relate to this? o_o; For my sake, ((If this didn't sound arrogant enough...)) I hope so.
[]X[] x_x Ugh. Computer froze for 45 minutes, give or take a minute. []X[]
You know, Ayumi Hamasaki isn't too bad after all...for being pop and everything.
Eh, Dir en Grey's new CD doesn't come out until September. That's...not cool. Not like I could actually find it in any stores, so I guess it doesn't really matter how long of a wait I'll have to take.
o.o; I think I'm going to make myself conscience again to the people in the chat I was talking about earlier. Most of the people whom I wasn't familar with left, and that's always a plus.
Excuse the grammar/spelling errors if there are any. I lack the motivation to actually check right now. o.o; Apology in advance.
Okiee then... cheerio, myself. o.o/)
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2003 2 August :: 12.31 pm
:: Mood: sore
:: Music: "Scum of the Earth" - Rob Zombie
"Blinded pain bleeds through the eyes."
...ouch... x_x Today has started off weird, and my legs really hurt right now, courtesy of Jimmy. For some reason or another he came up with this "great idea" to pound at my back door at 5:30 in the morning, drag me down to where all the track & feild stuff is, ((which is about a 20 minute walk from my house...)) and stand on the top bleacher-step, then jump off. He promised he wouldn't push me off the side where the trash cans were, but he did it anyway, and I fell. o_o; And just not your average everyday-fall, ((If I can call it that)) this was the type of fall you see on tv and know they're faking it from the start. One of those retarded-looking falls that were made just for a carmera-fall. Yeah...that's the best description I have for it, so you'll just have to settle for that. o.o; Anyway, my fall, saddly was a real, and really hurt. So after that was all done and over with I was One: way too tired to even care that I looked like a deformed squid all shriveled up by a seashore. Two: Couldn't move my left leg at the moment even if I tried. And Three: Being laughed at so hard by Jimmy for him to even realize I was half dead. o_o;...some friend he is. In anycase, Jimmy had to carry me back up the street and down a couple more to his house because he claimed he left something over there. So there I was, sitting on his front steps at 6:15 AM. Still dark and everything..
Then he came back outside with this piece of ice and a bandaid. He said it would help, but we both knew it wouldn't. o.o; What's a bandaid and a half melted piece of ice going to do with a hurt leg?...Nothing... So we ending up sliding the piece of ice up and down the railing, seeing who could make it go the longest without falling off. If anyone cares, I won. "hurrah."....o_o;... So when the piece of ice finally melted all the way, Jimmy got this other "great idea" to go to the conveinent store down the street, and drag me along as well. I really don't know why he insists on making me go with him everywhere, but somehow or another I end up either A: Hurt, or B: Lost. And that's what happened at the store. I was lost for exactly five minutes, but it still happened. Anyway, to shorten things up a bit, "another bright idea" came to us. We took Mock back down to the track because Jimmy thought that because he's so fat he needed to lose some weight. But Mock is old... Very old. And didn't want to run. Instead it sat there in the trash and watched. We tried to hook his leash to one of the pole-thingies, but because he has one of those stupid-cheap leasehes that only work if you have tape, we had to just leave him there. To sum everything up: Mock ran away, Jimmy and I spent 45 minutes looking for him, and no luck. Now, oddly enough, here it is, hours later, and still no one has said a word about Mock not being here. Oh well... He'll come back. o_o..Right?
All right, so enough about that. Hiei got one of these journal-thing-a-ma-bobs too, but I got offline before I could see it, so I guess I'll just have to wait. Frisky has one too, and Akira tried, but something went wrong and she never got her valid E-mail thing. Oi vey... Too much has happened today..
When I read this back it seems really boring, so sorry for wasting your time, once again, if you actually read this. I really am. o_o;
Um...okiee. Cheerio, myself. o.o/)
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2003 1 August :: 9.27 pm
:: Mood: restless
:: Music: "Evolution" - Ayumi Hamasaki
Oyaku?...
Eh, another entry. I don't even have anything to talk about this time. I've done nothing today. I haven't even left the house yet. o_o
But I did download this song I'm listening to right now. "Evolution" by Ayumi Hamasaki. At first I didn't want to download it because it's by Ayumi Hamasaki, who mostly has to do with J-Pop, and I don't like Pop music. But then I saw it was part of the anime .Hack//sign, so I said: "why not" to myself, and downloaded it. To make a short story even shorter, It's not too bad. The start of the song really drove me away for a minute, but then it came in with some other junk and turned the song around to being decent. Or at least acceptable. Kudd, Ashmo, Hiei, Noshi, myself, and pink-font-girl are online right now. Ashmo and Hiei have had their away message up for hours. o_o
Last time I got online their away messages were up, and now here it is, three hours later, and they're still there. Oh well... Sometimes I forget and leave the computer on, so maybe that's what happen. Or something completely different. I guess it doesn't matter either way. At any rate, as I've said before, I have nothing to talk about for the sole reason that I haven't done anything today. So, without any more petty talk, results to pointless quizzes:
Smart but angsty....now ask me another question
What JTHM moment are you? brought to you by Quizilla
The picture-thingie is from "Spork." o_o
:: remembers :: ...yeah....
And that ends the list of "quizzes to take."
Now I'm going to go look at Kudd's journal for something to write about, because Kudd's journal is interesting and sparkly, unlike mine. u_u
O.kiee, I found something interesting to do. More time consuming, really. But it will just have to sufice:
Your Name-
Renee
Nicknames-
I've been called "re-re" before. "Captain louisana" - people who know what I mean understand. o.o;
Birthday-
April 26th.
Have you...been kissed?
Yeash.
Have you...Eaten an entire box of Oreos?
No, oreos aren't cool. The white stuff is made of pure lard and sugar. o_o eck...
Have you...Been on stage?
Stage of what?
have you...Gotten in a car accident?
Yep... When I was four I fell with a car-seat on out of a moving car onto the street, and sat there for seven minutes before my dad realized the back car door was open, and I wasn't there. o.o;;
Have you...been to Death Valley on horseback?
Nope...
have you..Stayed home?
yeash...
Have you....Made homemade fudge?
Nope. Not allowed to use the oven. o.o; Nor microwave or stove, so I guess that eliminates my choices right there.
Have you...Seen the Eiffel tower?
In pictures and movies, yeash. Real life, no.
....Colour:
Orange, black, white, red,...and orange. Again.
....Band:
Dir en Grey, Psycho le Cemu, Bauhaus, The Cure, Rob Zombie, Alice in Chains, Jack off Jill, Pink Floyd, London after Midnight,...Don't make me name them all.... I'd only be wasting my time as people skip reading this question because frankly, no one cares about what kind of music I listen to. Or at least never had in the past. Why start now? o.O
....Season:
Autumn
....Commercial:
The complete informercial on "how to make the perfect egg."
Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
Yeash.
Favorite type of Sandwhich:
I usually just eat bread... Bread on bread is still a sandwhich, right?
Coffee or Hot Chocolate?
Hot chocolate. Even though they both do the same thing. Even look the same... Do you think they're related?
Cold or hot? weather?
Cold.
Big or little?
For what...? o_O
Lace or satin?
Satin. Lace is frilly..and....used to make door hangers. Yeah.
Red or blue?
Red. Or blue... Depending on which shade of each.
New or old?
Old. New things always have that "I'm new" smell to it.
Here or there?
There...
...And now I really have to go because I put someone on brb like, 15 minutes ago and still haven't gotten back to them. o_o; I hope this person isn't reading this either. Um...sorry.
....Cheerio myself. o.o/)
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2003 31 July :: 10.03 am
:: Mood: blah
:: Music: "Neverland" - The Sisters of Mercy
Sepia - The unnoticed colour.
Okiee, I've recently discovered that not too many people know what the word "sepia" means. I didn't until a while ago, but now I shall enlighten all who don't. Um.... it's a colour. There. Isn't much more I can say to that... Um, you know how in old pictures, the ones that aren't black and white, but brown-ish? Kind of like a stale regected tint of orange? Yeah, that's it. Don't ask why it's part of my screen-name, I just liked the idea of a sepia flamingo. Er, okiee, I got a real definition of the word:
1 a : the inky secretion of a cuttlefish b : a brown melanin-containing pigment from the ink of cuttlefishes
2 : a print or photograph of a brown color resembling sepia
3 : a brownish gray to dark olive brown color
All right, so there you have it. o_o..."wow."
And for all who knew what sepia was in the first place, I'm sorry I just wasted your time.
I also added some monkey-puff thing at the top of this page. It doesn't have a purpose; it doesn't have a name, but it's something to look at. o.o;.
At any rate, Maki keeps sending me lists of more quizzes to make, so to make her stop, here are the results:
((If quizilla will work this time...))
Your: Wondering eyes. Your not quite focused and
your quite the day dreamer. Your a bit odd and
as many say "Your head is in the
clouds."
What type of eyes do you have? brought to you by Quizilla
Stoner Bear
Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You? brought to you by Quizilla
o.o; For some reason I can't seem to recall this carebear being in the oringinals.
You're the loving smile,the one that is entirely
devoted to others,especially that one
person.You really can't get them out of your
head,but then,you don't really want to.
What Kind of Smile are You? brought to you by Quizilla
Singin' In The Rain: You are the "Singin'In
The Rain" scene. Your the scene that
makes people want to be dancing in the rain.
This scene is happy and meaningful. It shows
that love can make you do the weirdest things.
=)
What Famous Scene From A Movie Are You? brought to you by Quizilla
You know, the rain looks really fake now that I look at it. O_o; Did it always look so...artifical?
You are the musical movie "Singin' in the
rain". This movie is a very famous one in
hollywood. The story of a silent film actor
during the time that movies begin to have
sound. He meets and falls for the love of his
life and feels so good, he sings in the rain.
A great movies that is worth its place in
hollywood and can never been forgotten.
Which Musical Movie Are You? brought to you by Quizilla
You're A Yaoi Boi (Gay Boy)!
Sensitive and caring, you just want some boyXboy love! Is that too much to ask?
What Type Of Anime Character Are You? brought to you by Quizilla
X_x; I don't even think that result could be possible, yet alone correct.
I would have put more in, but Akira's online, so,..... I don't have a point in talking to myself anymore.
Cheerio, myself. o.o/)
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2003 30 July :: 2.27 am
:: Mood: awake
:: Music: "Dark Entries" - Bauhaus
organic bananas and bread crust
All right, so here is my attempt on using css, or whatever it's called. As we both can plainly see, I suck. I suck at any form of html, css, php, flash, and any other sort of graphing. But that's okiee... because I really don't care either way. And that's a lie. Yeash I do...o.o;
Anyway, thank you Kudd for reading/spitting/suggesting in this journal-thingie-of mine. I now have two friends, which in my opinion, isn't too shabby.
I also would like to add that Kudd's journal-thing is a lot better looking than mine. o_o;
a lot.
Erm, in any case, four people are online right now. Kudd, myself, and, not as if this were anything new, two people I honestly can't remember whom they are. I really need to clean out my buddy list...
I was talking to Hiei and Berto earlier. Well, more like talking through Berto to talk to Hiei. o.o; Complicated, but effective. But then Berto kinda went away, and then so did Hiei because he said he had to take some shot now. And now I'm left here, bored, with nothing to do but, yeash, you guessed it, talk to myself in this journal-ma-bob-thang.
Maki gave me another list of quizzes she wants me to take, and being how that sounds a lot better then trying to think up stuff to say, I'll retort with a list of results to that list of quizzes:
Eh.....never mind. Either my computer isn't working right, again, or quizilla has decided not to work for me right now. Either way, I've found something better to do, so I'm leaving...myself. o_o
Um.....cheerio, then. O.o/)
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2003 27 July :: 1.08 am
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: "It's the end of the world as we know it"- R.E.M. ((You know you love it.))
Isolation and half a bowl of soup.
...Okiee, Maki, the girl who told me to make one of these-thingies, has now compelled me to take these series of quizzes, which are now changing my boredom into tired-ness. At any rate, she told me to post them, so post them I shall do:
You represent... apathy.
You don't really show any emotion. You can be
considered cruel and cold, but you just don't
really care about anything. This is just the
way you are... you're quite a challenge to get
close to, and others may perceive you as
boring.
What feeling do you represent? brought to you by Quizilla
See...I told you I was boring. o_o
YOU ARE MARRIED TO A WoODCHUCK!!!
what's YOUR deepest secret? brought to you by Quizilla
Who knew...?
Pre-Hyptnotized Peter
What Office Space character are you? brought to you by Quizilla
Um...o.o; Okiee?
schizotypal
Which Personality Disorder Do You Have? brought to you by Quizilla
...And that's all I took before I realized I had to stop and post them because I'm being yelled at to get off. So, once again, goodbye to myself. o.o/) Cheerio.
o_o; You have no idea how it feels to actually make saying goodbye to your own self noticed. Oh the shame...
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2003 26 July :: 4.23 pm
:: Mood: uncomfortable
:: Music: "T.D.F.F." - Dir en Grey
And boredom strikes again.
"Oi vey." I think that's how you spell it...
I'm not one to know hebrew, so you'll just have to go along with me on this.
Wow... Here I am again. Talking to myself in this site-self-type-journal-thingie. Only four people online... Noshi, myself, and two people whom, once again, name's I can't think of. But I guess that's besides the point. They're names aren't important unless the situation comes up. Anywho...
The friend of mine who "forced" me to create this thingie was the only one to respond to the last entry-thing. If anyone wanted to know, that is... Or care, for better words.
She corrected me on the "Hibee Jibee" stuff too. She told me to write about what happened today, but that's boring because I live an uneventful life which replays itself on a daily bases. But, as boredom as my witness, I'll do it anyway.
Today I learned my dog as fleas. That doesn't surprise me much though... Can people have fleas? If so, that'd be weird. No, not as weird as it would be entertaining. If someone was walking down the street with one of those white-cones on their head used for dogs to stop itching their ears would be quite amusing. Yeash... But then again, so are people on a leash. Well....not really, but fun to look at, nevertheless.
Jimmy had a leash once. He told me to stick it to his shirt, but it was in school and the teacher said we're not suppose to play with leashes, or something like that.
...And now I've just found something better to do than talking to myself, so I'll just be off now...
Um........Cheerio, to myself.
...o_o.....
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2003 26 July :: 1.10 am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: "Mask"- D.e.G.
Two words: Catapulting Teacups
O.kiee... I don't honestly know how to work this thing. It looked a lot more appealing when the person who gave me this link, ((for no apparent reason, might I add)) was telling me about it. Something about not being able to press the side buttons when typing, but I'm sure that won't ruin anything...
I thought this was a stupid idea to make this....whatever you want to call it.... And I still think it's a stupid idea. Blame it on boredom. Yeash... It's the only explaination I can think of. Plus I needed to use that Flamingo icon somewhere. o.o;
It was so lonely backed away from the rest of my files that have no labels. And that reminds me that I need to label them, because I can't find anything when I'm trying to find something...
...Anyways... This is awkward. Talking to absolute nothingness. I'm not saying it's something new to me, o_o.., Just awkward. I really do abuse that word too much. I can't think of another word to replace it though, so abused it shall be.
When I re-read this it doesn't sound anything like me... I feel...awkward. No. Just not-me. Don't make fun of me for doing this, either. I'm doing it out of sake of options. I have this, or getting off pretend brb and talking to someone who I fairly know about the same thing we talked about yesterday, although we have nothing better to say, so we say it anyway. Did that make sense?...
I guess I'm not going to get a response from a site-thing-a-ma-bob, and that's why there's a handy-dandy button somewhere on this page to make me feel better about having nothing better to do in my life than talk to myself. No, this is worse than talking to myself. This is talking to myself to the 1st degree. Not only am I going on and on about whatnot to no one directly, but I'm publizing it. Publizing isn't a word.... Hold on, I need to look it up. o_o....
*Publicizing.
There. That's the word...
I think I abuse the "...dots..." privilege, too. Oh well, it's not like anyone has said anything. Until right now, because if they're reading this, they're thinking about it, and saying to themself: "You know what, Renee does abuse the dot privilege. She needs to be nailed to a sake and set to flames."
Or something relevent to that.
Or you could always just be sitting there saying to yourself: "No...that's not what I think so shut up, because you don't know what I think, you thinking-I-know-what-I'm-thinking, thinker."
...Yeah...
The more I keep thinking about this site-thingie, ((I really don't know what to call it)),
the more I agree with myself. This really was a stupid idea. No need to tell me...
But like I said, nothing better to do=typing in this thingie. I don't even know what I'm suppose to be typing in here. The girl who gave this to me bluntly said: "Just write a bunch of Hibee-Jibee, and then go from there."
In Hibee-Jibee sense, ((which sounds like one of those polka dances)) I guess that means I can type whatever I want.
...Right? O.o
Okiee then.
Seven people online right now, including myself since I put my own screen name on my buddy list. Kudd is online, but she's got an away message up... Come to think of it, so do I. I can't remember why it's there though. The rest of the people on my buddy list are those who I can no longer remember their names. To them I apologize...
I take that back. They should apologize for being on my buddy list and never IMing me to remind me of their names. Does anyone else have this problem?
No....? Yeash...?
You know what, "Mask" is a good song. A good song that we all need to listen to.
:: nods ::
Go and download it.... Because I have nothing else to type, and I still have a lot of time to waste.
Do you think I'm taking the -"End a sentense, skip a line."- thing too greatfully?
I don't want this to look all ugly, it will clash with the Flamingo's cool-ness.
.......dot...dot......................dot....
...So here I am. Sitting. Typing. Well, not right now. But then again I might be. Maybe... Yeah. A month left of Summer Vacation. Today was my last day of summer school. "Hurrah." It started two weeks ago, so I guess you can say without repent that I got a month's worth of summer vacation. I don't call my vacation offical until summer school is over, anyway. Which, I may sadly add, is something I attend to yearly. o_o;
I really don't sound like myself, do I?
You know, I've never really stopped and read what I've wrote aloud like this. o.O; Do I always sound this.... boring? O_o
I hope not. It's the absence of caffiene. Yeash... Nobody fixed coffee, and I'm now allowed to use the kitchen appliances. And right now I'm too lazy to check if that word it spelled correctly, so you'll just have to settle for the part you can comprehend.
Poo... I still need to waste more time before the "stranger-danger" person who's name I cannot remember is no longer able to notice I've been on brb for about an hour, and maybe she'll....((Or He'll, I can't remember which..x_X;))...will just end up leaving.
o.o;;; Don't get the wrong idea when I say this whole "pretend brb-thingie" though. I only do that with people I don't know, or in this case, can't remember their name and find them honestly quite annoying. I guess then this doesn't serve as a problem, because the only people accessing this page are people I know. I hope... Occassionally I'll go on "pretend" brb, and end up really walking away, so it ends up as a "real" brb anywho.
Okiee, I think it's safe to get off brb now, so I guess this thingie has no purpose any longer. All right-y then, Cheerio. o.o/)
...Adieu, random-nothing-ness-in-which-I-spent-a-half-an-hour-of-my-time-wasting-from-trying-to-aviod-more-awkward-ness.
I'll have to come up with a nickname for this thing, because that name won't due. o.o;
Okiee........Cheerio.
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