tuwang
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2012 8 January :: 11.56pm
Things are good. I spent my birthday with the girl and a few select others... pretty much just the girl though. We did a lot of dancing with each other, both metaphorically and literally. We drank champagne. We kissed at midnight. It was nice. It was also oddly adult which kind of freaks me out.
the only thing I need is a new job. Really... that's it. I like where I live and my new room mates and everything. Just the job...
I'm really coming to grips with myself and I like it.
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tuwang
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2012 2 January :: 11.45am
2012 bucket list:
[] get a new job
[] quit outback
[] get a real phone
[] get a new car
[] have more than 5000 in an untouchable account, preferably one with high returns
[] break that 6 month relationship mark that seems to constantly elude me
[] don't stab anyone
[] work out more
[] Go back to MI to visit
[] Get a credit card
[] Go to a wizards, capitals, and nationals game (not redskins, the suck and it's impossible to get tickets)
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tuwang
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2011 30 December :: 4.06pm
guess who got the phone interview?
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tuwang
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2011 21 December :: 3.10pm
I feel like I'm getting better at managing my self diagnosed bi-polar disorder. Mostly the last week has been a test of this.
I'm all moved into the new place, which is a huge weight off of my shoulders. My room mates are awesome.
next step is to go and sign up at a recruiter. Not totally sure which one or who to go to though.
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jordanmackenzie7
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2011 16 December :: 9.19pm
Isn't it rather amazing how one bad day ruins the several good days leading up to it? I find it fascinating that one person, who treated me well for the better part of two weeks, can completely ruin the memories of the good days in one foul swoop.
Does this ever happen to you? Or am I that negative where I only focus on the bad?
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phil-himself
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2011 14 December :: 10.09pm
I know who I am, you're the dude who don't know what dude he is
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jordanmackenzie7
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2011 13 December :: 8.58am
I love waking up in the morning to the smell of baby shit...
Ya know, a lot has changed for me over the course of the last year and half or so. Not that that isn't the case at any given point in our lives, but even more so in the past year and a half for me. I finally became a person I like looking in the mirror at. And that's saying something, considering the majority of the time when I look in the mirror I see baggy eyes, unplucked eyebrows, and pasty skin. When I look down at my naked body all I see is my toes protruding from behind a too-big tummy ravaged by scars... Scars from carrying the most beautiful baby boy I've ever seen, scars from a surgery necessary so an i.u.d. didn't kill me, pudge from making my son a good home while he grew inside of me. When I look at these "less than beautiful" attributes about myself I am not ashamed. I'll poke some fun and myself for not working off the baby weight and move on with my day. Because my days are now filled with a totally different kind of fun. This is the closest to being a carefree kid I've been since I was a carefree kid. By no means am I careless or carefree, but I feel a sense of innocence surround me that I haven't known before in my life. Haevin does that for me. He makes every difficult time worth it's weight in gold, and then some! Am I a perfect mother and wife? Hell no. But I try, and I am pretty happy with who I am. Even better is that I don't really care who I am to anyone who doesn't matter. If they don't like me, tough shit. The people who are closest know what I stand for, and so do the strangers. If they don't like it... they can take a hike!
Onto my main point. I love the little things in life. I love waking up in the morning to the smell of baby shit. It means that my son is healthy. Yeah, it stinks. But it's a life-affirming sort of stench, lol. I get sick of reading about people who are so focused on "getting there." Life is a journey. It's appreciating everything, the good and the bad. It's not a race to the finish line. If you ever make it to that finish line you better plan on croaking the following day, because that's about it son. When you've stopped learning and caring, and appreciating, your time has come.
This morning I was paid a very nice compliment by my sister on my Facebook page. She said she loved me and was proud of the person I'd become. That really made my day. That someone else can see and appreciate my growth even though it has little, if not nothing to do with them is very refreshing! I have some amazing family to be grateful for. Life is good. And if you haven't realized it yet, start looking for your bliss. Because there will always be negative things in your life to focus on. If you allow them to consume you, you will spend your life miserable. This, I promise you.
So, as corny as it may be... Be the change you want to see in the world.
Rant concluded!
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