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You seek the ecstasy in every moment
not caring what the consequence may

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xxinterrupted

:: 2004 24 July :: 1.19am
:: Mood: depressed
:: Music: breaking benjimin - so cold

"i feel, i feel dead inside.
nothings bringing me back
from this. not this time."

2 kisses | kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 19 July :: 11.40pm
:: Mood: crappy

blah blah blah, everyones getting on me for not eating anything. i don't know, i just don't feel like eating, so i don't eat.

only 6 more days til vacation with jim.

1 kisses | kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 17 July :: 11.22pm
:: Mood: lonely
:: Music: futurama on tv

nothing really happened yeterday.

today i woke up around noon and got a shower. my mom stayed home from the bar so we could go to the mall. we left around 1:30-2:00. it took me about 20 minutes to get a shower because the water kept turning off while i was in it. it was tickin' me off.

we went to the washington mall i got a pair of red dickies and a pink shirt with a black star on it from hot topic, they won't fit me now but they'll fit after the baby's born.

at fashon bug they were having a big sale so i got two maternity shirts, just a plain black one and a white one that buttons half way down. then i got a pair of mudd jeans, and a black & pink stripped shirt that ties down the sides.. again, those things won't fit until after the baby's born.. but i'm starting "school shopping" now so i'll actually have something to wear when i go back. oh and i got a cute little black hat.

we stopped at the bon ton, i got a grayish-black tank top that's really cute. that won't fit until after the baby's born either..

we went to the gap for kids and looked on the sale rack for baby clothes. we got so many cute little onesies/hats and other cute little things for the baby! god, i can't wait to wear them on her. :-D

for lunch i had chinesse. my mom and i shared some sorta chicken with rice and an egg roll. the rice was good. but it made me sick.

i spent $20 at clairs on the cutest jewelry. it was all on sale. lol

i got home around 7:00, then went swimming for about an hour or so. called jim, he has tonight off; and doesn't come over again.. i think he likes to just make me depressed or something.

i think i'm goin' to amys tomorrow. not positive yet though.. we'll see what goes on.

this is the first time i've been online all day. that's amazing.

[edit] 11:53 pm

it was nice actually having my mom home today. i haven't even seen her [at all] for about a week and a half now.. i'm so tired of being home alone all the time, i get lonely.

and i'm telling jim now that i'm sorry.. it just happened. i haven't done it in a long long time.

<3<3

3 kisses | kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 15 July :: 11.20pm

wow, some people are really desperate.

get a life, and your own boyfriend!

6 kisses | kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 15 July :: 9.46pm
:: Mood: melancholy

it's funny how 1 story can sound so different from 2 different people.
..jim wants me to go with jim to kennywood with him, his mom, ronnie, his brother and one of his friends. hmm.. let me think. that's stupid. and he got all mad when i told him i didn't want to go. okay; i'll go and be miserable and make him feel bad for me because i can't ride like 1/2 the rides. it's an all over bad idea. he was like "well you know i'm still gonna go with or without you" i was like "good for you, have fun. take someone else."

whatever, i don't give a fuck about anything anymore.

[edit] 11:02 pm

jim called around 10:30 and asked what kind of diapers to buy if there was any special kind.. why does he always do something so stupid, that's so sweet. he makes it so i can't ever hate him.
ahh!!!!

2 kisses | kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 15 July :: 6.01pm
:: Mood: depressed
:: Music: muse - time is running out

SvvEeTbLoNdEcHiC: just remember u are so much better than this girl so dont even think for a second that u dont have somethin that she does bc u have everything and jim is just a blind ass mother f-er lol

aww.. thanks kristen.

4 kisses | kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 14 July :: 6.07pm
:: Mood: calm

my school schedual.
1st pd. economincs & government - areford
2nd pd. geometry - brletich
3rd pd. english 11 - baker
4th pd. accounting 1 - skilles
5th pd. study hall [mon. tue. thur.] - downing, fitness (gym) [wed. fri.] - mitchell
6th pd. study hall - gurdish
7th pd. child development 2 - taylor
8th pd. biology - foglia

hmmm.. i don't know how i got 6th period all week long study halls..

kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 14 July :: 1.14am
:: Mood: moody
:: Music: petey pablo - freek-a-leak

pictures


i took this yesterday.. yes it's me. and yeah, i'm very much pregnant! [29 weeks along] wow, i look fat. this is for you kathy!


jim and i sitting by the pool.. we just got done swimming. this was taken on the 11th, when jim stayed over.

6 kisses | kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 12 July :: 11.55pm
:: Mood: restless

i was just sitting here, looking at my pictures on my camera.. i haven't uploaded them; basicly because i've been procrastinating.. but i'll do it tomorrow most likely. [and i'll put one of me with my belly so you can see it kathy!] lol

didn't really do that much today. jim was here. we went swimming and watched some movies and what-not. he left around 6:30 and went home. blah, he left right before dinner was ready!

for dinner i made steak on the grill. haha, me cook? it's a scary thought, but i actually did it. i only burnt myself about 3 times. luckly jim helped me.

after he went home, kelly came over and we walked up to the mingo twist n shake for some ice cream. i got a large artic swirl with extra oreos. i don't know why i always get a large. i can't ever finish it.

..boring day as usual

1 kisses | kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 12 July :: 2.02pm
:: Mood: cheerful
:: Music: shhh.. jim's sleeping!

"when i didn't need anyone.. i needed you"
so for my last entry, the pains i was having was just braxton hicks contractions.. i was getting all worked up over nothing. but i'm glad everythings okay.

yesterday i woke up and got a shower and everything then went down jims house around 3:00. we didn't really do anything, just talked about stuff. i actually think we fell back asleep on the couch for a while, but i'm not completely sure.. lol. at 8:00, george came to pick us up. when we got to my house we went swimming.. it was actually pretty nice in the water. then my mom and george ordered some pizza and hoagies from up the mingo twist n shake, and got a fire going. when the pizza got here, it was all gross. the pizza wasn't cooked all the way; the hoagie was cold; and georges stromboli was luke warm. we were all so ticked off. after we made smores and marshmellows, my mom george and anna went in and left sam jim and i outside by the fire. i think it was around 12:30-1:00 by the time we came in. jim and i played nintendo! i love that system. oh yeah, so much better than all those new game systems! haha. after a while we got tired of playing and went online for a bit, then watched tv and talked. we fell asleep around 5:30.. we both kept saying we were going to go to sleep earlier; but then we'd start to talk about something else. lol i just woke up around 1:00. jim's still sleeping.

god, i just got this massive headache..

we watched True Life: I've got baby mama drama on MTV last night. [it was about teenage kids having babies] there was this one couple where they were both 19 i think, and the guy broke up with the pregnant girl for some 16 year old. omg, that pissed me off. i guess it's kinda like the situation i'm in. little 14 year old girls trying to take jim away from me..? yeah right, over my dead body will i let that happen. sorry; jim is definitly the best boyfriend i'd ever had.. and i'm not gonna lose that.

i have pictures from last night; but i don't feel like posting them now.. i'll do it later maybe, i don't know.

<3

1 kisses | kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 11 July :: 1.16am
:: Mood: frustrated

stupid pains
i was almost asleep about 20 minutes ago, and then i kept getting these pains in my lower abdomen. well earlier today when i was down jims house i kept getting really bad cramps. i hope everythings okay; if these pains don't go away by the time i go home, i'm gonna ask my mom and see what she thinks. i hope everythings okay.. :-/

so i went to jims yesterday around 4:00 i got there. we didn't really do anything.. just talked and watched the movie what lies beneath or something and ordered some food from kuzins. i got up amys around 8:45, and we just chilled. i'm goin' back down jims house today because amy is leaving in the morning to go to a family picnic with her gram in ohio. so my mom is gonna come pick him and i up around 7:00 and he's gonna stay over my house til monday when he has to go to work.

amy and her sisters stupid rat keeps scaring me. i'm sitting here all by myself and it keeps running in its wheel making noises. jeeze.. lol

..i really hope everythings okay with the baby and i just have cramps or something dumb like that. i'm not gonna be able to sleep tonight because i'm going to be thinking about it.

5 kisses | kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 9 July :: 11.01pm
:: Mood: crappy
:: Music: "what not to wear" on tv.

i woke up at 2:00 in the afternoon. tried to call jim. it was 6:30-7:00 by the time i actually got ahold of him. he was on his way over, but i was pissed off because he didn't get here earlier so i just told him not come over and hung up.

i made plans to do things this weekend, because my sisters were supposed to go to there dads, but no; anna didn't want to go, so once again i get stuck watching them. i'm not a mom yet.. i shouldn't have to act like one all the time! but whatever. i'm definitly doing something tomorrow with or without jim. my mom george and anna are going to some picnic, so i'm free to do whatever.

i think i'm gonna get a ride to the mall tomorrow and to see a movie. i don't care if i have to go myself, i'm going to go.

kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 8 July :: 11.12pm
:: Mood: tired






*HUGS* TOTAL!
give Jena more *HUGS*

Get hugs of your own

kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 8 July :: 12.50pm
:: Mood: cranky

stupid pills always make me sick.
i woke up around 12:00.. my mom woke me up to see if i wanted to go to greensburg with her; but instead i talked her into taking me to jims house for the day. i told him the only way i'd come down is if he'd push me on the swings down at the park. lol, he said he would. we'll see what actually happens. i'll update later.

[edit]
time: 6:15 PM

i just got home about 10 minutes ago, i ended up not going to jims, well i did go to his house but he didn't answer his phone so i just went with my mom to greensburg to look at RV's to rent for a week.. we stopped at bob evans to get something to eat, i got pan cakes with homefries, eggs, and sausage. mmm. it was good. jim called me at like 5:30 and was appologizing because he slept the whole day and didn't answer his phone. but whatever, i'm still upset about it. i woulda just walked in his house except i got there around 2:00, and he told me last night that his mom was going to be there until 3:00, so i didn't want to just walk in and her be sitting on the couch or anything; i'd feel so stupid! lol. but anyway, i guess jim is gonna get me a ride to and from his house tomorrow.. but we'll see what actually happens.

i hope he'll be able to go with us when we go on vacation at the end of july [we're renting a 37' RV for a week, and taking a trip up to niagria falls in canada] i doubt he will because of his job; but i'll see if i can't make him take off or something. he has to go, or i won't have any fun.

2 kisses | kiss me


xxinterrupted

:: 2004 7 July :: 6.33pm

i've been into taking these quizes again for some reason.. i don't know why though.



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