:: 2008 21 November :: 2.39 am

And i still won it.

8 Comments | Leave a comment

:: 2008 18 November :: 3.55 am

so, i saw the first cut of the summer film today. well, it's already been through several revisions. but this was the first public screening.

i will say, some things turned out really well. some did not. i'm glad to see that it came together okay, at least. i would have been pissed if it sucked, and surprised if it was out of this world. i still think some of the big problems with the story are in the script itself, and are therefore beyond fixing at this point. i also think that cleaning up the audio will do wonders. and that is going to be a formidable task. i'm just wondering if my class next semester is going to have to do all that. it would be interesting. then i'd have my hands on it during two phases of the process, instead of just one. that would be weird.

other than that, just business as usual. falling steadily farther behind in all of the important classes, with the one class that i'm doing best in the only class i'm actually making headway on.

it'll all come together in the end. i just hope the collision isn't too catastrophic for me to keep it together.

and in the meantime, just keep plugging away at it, little by little. but i am also running out of time, which means a step up in pace is in order.

1 Comment | Leave a comment

:: 2008 11 November :: 1.14 am
:: Music: Coldplay

Leave a comment

:: 2008 29 October :: 1.26 am
:: Mood: contemplative

recollections
::

i feel like i've lost a lot of my pizzazz. (or maybe you spell it pissass. depending on how many laxatives i took that day.) you know? i feel like i used to have more vitality, more everything. not that i was a driven, self-motivated type of person. not that i was spastic or rambunctious. i just feel like i had an undercurrent of motion that just isn't there anymore.

nowadays i let the simplest things prevent me from getting anything done, and i really don't feel the need to try and innovate, or make new things happen. i'm content to attempt, and fail, to merely recreate those which have come before. nothing outstanding. nothing superb. i just settle for okay.

but that really doesn't seem right. i don't want just an okay life. i don't want just okay friends. okay coworkers. okay family. that's not how it works for me. i feel like everything about my life up to this point has been outrageous. and now it's just mellowing out. i guess it's my job to keep it outrageous. but i have a lot of fucking jobs right now, which i guess is what's bogging me down. so, adding the job of unbogging myself to the pile doesn't really work. it'll just exacerbate the problem.

so, i just need to get a few things out of the way, one at a time, so that i have a bit more freedom to have some of that guilt-free, sporadic, funtime. where my energy is put to its most effectively pragmatic use. because clearly i don't get shit done when it comes to actual work. but give me something fun to do, and i'll forget to eat, sleep, and go to the bathroom, i'm so diligent.

and faking myself out to think that the "work" stuff is actually "fun" stuff doesn't cut it. believe me, i've tried. although, i have discovered that some of the "fun" stuff is actually "work". but since it falls under "fun" in my classifications, i can still do that, at least.

i guess we'll make it happen eventually. and until then, i'll just have to tough it out. but i want to be fun and exciting again. none of this boring, grumpy, old man nonsense. that suits me at times. but i don't think this should be one of those times.

i'll get there, and i'll enjoy it. but i'm not there yet. and there's no sense in rushing it.

1 Comment | Leave a comment

:: 2008 15 October :: 3.46 am

5 Comments | Leave a comment

:: 2008 15 October :: 3.32 am
:: Mood: sleepy

I mean, crap, man.

... that's, like, his stomach plug on the ground, there. That's not even physically possible, if you think about it....

::

so yeah. i really need to clean out my email inbox. it's seriously bad.

i also need to stop failing at doing my homework. i turned in a paper today that was almost a week late, and when i was called on for discussion in another class, i just told her that i couldn't answer the question, because i didn't do the reading. not that half the class did. but the fact that i had to put it out there in words was awkward.

and it's not going to let up. theoretically i'll be starting work soon, which will only cause things to get worse. then again, maybe it will keep me busy to where i'm more productive and more motivated. hopefully that's the case.

either way, something has to change, because i can't keep going on like i am. i have serious issues with getting to bed, getting up, getting my work done, and getting places on time. especially lately. and it's very uncool.

that aside, the front moved through. that's nice. much cooler tonight. makes me happy. i'm excited for fall.

Leave a comment

:: 2008 26 September :: 1.48 am
:: Mood: tired?
:: Music: mr. deeds soundtrack

6 Comments | Leave a comment

:: 2008 24 September :: 11.56 am

this semester is strange.

i don't know where i was going with that.

i just know that it's noon and i need to get up off my duff and start doing things. otherwise i'll be late and unprepared for my meetings today.

... that sounds so big-person-ish.

3 Comments | Leave a comment

:: 2008 21 September :: 12.45 am

i went jogging today. kind of.

went about 2.5 miles. walked most of it. i'm horribly out of shape.

and i had a bunch of food before i left.

even still, i know i'll appreciate doing it. i'll be sore tomorrow, but it's the good kind.

Leave a comment

:: 2008 11 September :: 2.40 am

busy

so, apparently in addition to being "technical director" for the radio station, i am now also the vice president of the scientists of sound.

when it rains, it pours.

i'm not even sure i want to add these to my resume. but at least it sounds impressive. far more impressive than the harry potter club.

i just hope i'm better prepared tomorrow (and more punctual) than i was on tuesday. just sayin'.

sleepy time pretty quick here, though. that should help.

Leave a comment