you will when you belive
Well today was a fun day. I didn't wake up till around 10 and one was because my alarm clock wouldn't shut up, and because Ryan called. He said that he was at the beach with everyone (Sean, Helen, Jared, Some other guy, Alex, Alex, Ashley, Vonny. If there were others and I forgot your name sorry.) Well I talked to Ryan and he made it seem like I shouldn't come over and I was like you poo head. Well I finally got up and took a shower, and I headed over to Luna Rosa to get some food cause I was hungry. Well I didn't have a bathing suit bottom so after I ate I went shopping for one and I found a cute black one. I finally met up with Ryan on the sidewalk after I shopped; He looks so good without his shirt...and other things hehe..just playing. We all layed out there for awhile until we had to go becasue of the parking meters. Well I invited everyone to my house and we went into the pool, at first it was sorta boring till we started playing volleyball. Yah the girls team sorta sucked....it was sad. Then we sorta drifted off from playing after awhile. We dried off and went inside to watch 13 ghosts, while i was changing Brad showed up. Well we were getting hungry so we ordered some pizza and wings. I ended up paying for most of it...blah. Then after the movie was over everyone left. I got a tan, and a lil' sunburned. I got to hang out with Ryan mostly the whole day so that was nice. Yay I'm getting to hang out with him more. He's getting his liscense on tuesday if all goes to plan which I think it will so that will be REALLY cool. Well I'm done here.

-Chasmin-

We got elegance
Wow my night was just made. Ryan was hanging out with everyone, and they were on the ave. I called him up and he was like I don't want you to be hanging out with me cause I'm in a bad mood and I was like I don't care. Then he said that they all were headed to the beach. I was like really..hmm. Well I told him to come over and we would hang out in the driveway. Well he came over and it was a really nice 20 mins together, just what I needed. I love that kid, he is such a sweetheart. Oh yah and Ryan you will NEVER win, unless if you can figure out a way ::wink::.

-Chasmin-

Diet coke
What went on today? Hmm anything interesting, no not really. Well we went to eat at Luna Rosa and it was incradibly windy and we were eating with some couple and I was getting ignored...again. Well I really didn't want to be there, well my mom noticed that and she asked if I wanted to go and I nodded. Well she let me drive home by myself, from the resturant. It wasn't very far but it was cool doing it anywhoozles. Well that's about it.

-Chasmin-

Avo juice
Well I'm gonna write about the chorus concert and, today. The chorus concert, this was by far the best concert we have ever had. I think it was because we were having so much fun. Roger and I did our lil' solo duet thingie, and it was awesome. My friend was like, "Oh my god it looked so real, if I was your b.f I would have been insanely jelous." I was just like meep. I had to put on a show and I did it. We didn't kiss, and in a way I'm glad. He did kiss my hand though a couple of times, and we just hugged in the end so it was cool. I was happy with our performance. Everyone did AMAZING! Lorelei's solo, she sings so purdy. Everyone. I was about to cry last night it was so sad. With all the goodbyes and the songs. Well that's basically all I want to put for the concert. Now onto today. In chorus there were barely any people cause of all the seniors not having to be there. So we sung Disney songs all day and that was really fun. What else happened. Oh okay in Dr.Berry's class if you have a D or an F he sends out these letters to your parents telling them (if they don't know already) Well I have brought my grade up a bit but it's a D well I knew he was sending them out and I have been watching the mail for the past few days. Well I come home right around when the mail is dropped off. I was walking home from my bus stop (Which is right up the street) and I see my jeep go around the corner and I'm like FUCK! the mails there she's gonna get it I know it. I start running. I get there just in time to get the mail shove the letter up my shirt and hand her the mail without her seeing it....I was like oh my god. I was shaking and out of breath. Well I'm glad i pulled that off. Well I need to go eat. Toodles.

*I forgot to put in here about the concert last night. Telvin this guy in chorus hadn't talked to me since that day when Ebere punched out that window. Well last night after I sang my solo/ duet thingie with Verhanika, I was going back to my place and Telvin just looks at me and is like "Damn smurf" (That's what he calls me) and I look up at him and I'm like "Are we talking again?" and he gives me this face we usually give each other and he nods and we just hug. I was really happy that whole situation had been bugging me for a long while now. We hugged a few times later, and I called him big head again it was happy fun times.

-Chasmin-

dweedly doo
I think pretty woman is now one of my new favorite movies...such goodness. Julia Roberts was really pretty, and she had some crazy ass hair. Richard gere was pretty sexy....then again he always is. Jason Alexander was a dick and I wanted to shoot him, but thats besides the point. If you havent seen the movie Pretty Woman, then you should...right now DAMNIT!

-Chasmin-

Get it out of my head@!$@#@$
ROckNPoPSicLE: being smart isnt about ur grades in school, or how well u communicate ideas with others, its about being able to live life for the right things, and bringing knowledge and joy to other ppl

I so agree with Ashely on this. My teacher needs to realize this about Ryan...and so does most of my family. DAMN ADULTS TO HELL...sometimes.

-Chasmin-

Oh we knew we couldn't loose half the audience were jews.
Wow today was my date with Ryan and honestly it was amazing. We really didn't do much, but I had a great time. We went to the movies and we saw Van Hellsing; good movie. Then we walked back towards my house and hung out at veterans for an hour or two. We then had to go back to my house so I could walk the dogs...but Fran did it already. So Ryan and I headed to the beach. We stayed there till about 8 I think then we came back to the house and he left. I was so romantic and fun. Things I think are really back to normal. Ryan and I created a new game for each other, and I learned something new hehe. Well I am going to go recap in my mind the accounts of today, and smile contently.

-Chasmin-

You've all heard of theater in the round? You'r looking at the man who made theater in the square nobody had a good seat!!
Last night I saw The Producers...omg so good. Though I would like to see it with Nathan Lane, and Matthew Broderick. No one can ever take their place...I mean even on the cd you can feel the emotion. The actors last night were great don't get me wrong but yah know. There was this Gay beyond gay guy and he was so hilarious. There was this part where they brought this big mirror out so you can see the top of everyones head. And it was the Springtime for Hitler scene and it had these people with these dummies, and they all got into this formation and it was a swastica...you would have to see it I laughed so hard. I'm happy I get to go on a date with squishy today...::smiles all happily:: Well I'm going to go finish watching my movie.

-Chasmin-

Anything can happen in the woods...may I kiss you?
Well I put this in here last night but right as I was posting it my internet went down...and it was deleted. Well last night was the solo and ensemble state sorta finals things and I got....SUPERIOR! Oh yah go me. They judge was really cool and he loved my voice. This was the first time I had actually gotten Superior at state..I hope not the last. I got to meet Daniels b.f he's cute those guys are so cute together. You can see that they like each other alot. What else oh yah everyone got Superiors so rock on everryone. I talked to Roger (The guy I'm doing the duet with on tuesday) about what we were going to do, and we came to a mutual agreement that we are just going to wing it and see what happens. So I don't know what's going to go on so meh. I really think thats about it. I need to finish my story online I'll put the link in here to it so you all can read it it's really good. Heres the link http://www.fictionpress.com/read.php?storyid=1257942 You all who like romance stories should read it...so awesome.
-Chasmin-

You know what happens?..I close the door you get no tip
Well things are being resolved between Ryan and I. We sortof figured out what has been wrong with us. The evil wrongness was communication. We really didn't know how to talk to each other. I had to pry something out of him, which in a way I sortof knew the answer to but then again...I didn't. Alright, Roger (This kid in chorus) and I are doing a duet for the chorus concert. It's a song from Jekyll and Hyde, well it's a love song and all the mushy lovey dovey stuff. Well we were auditioning yesterday and everyone thought that we should kiss at the end of that song. Even though in a way I wanted to do it...just cause it's Roger but then again I really didn't want too cause of Ryan and I knew I would feel horrible. So I asked Ryan what I should do. I was talking to him online and I was like "Ryan I'm doing this duet with this guy in chorus, and everyone says we should kiss in the end of the song but I don't really want too cause of you. So should I just hug him?" He just said "Sure go ahead I don't care". Well that sortof made me mad cause I wanted him to take control and be like NO don't kiss him what are you thinking sortof thing...cause he never does that. Well I let it go for awhile and then my internet dies so I call him up and he was saying that when he gets a job some of our plans together might fall through and I was like thats ok, I understand when really I wanted to kill the non exsistant job that hasn't cancelled our plans. But I just said what I thought he wanted to hear...sorta what he did to me. Well I get all quiet and sad and the whole fact of him not caring was pissing me off so I just said bye, and got off the phone. Well I'm laying there in my bed trying to watch the Matrix: Revolution but I wasn't able to enjoy it cause my mind was racing with the thought "Why doens't he care?!?" So I call up Lorelei to ask her what to do and she told me to call him and talk about it. We talked about some stuff for awhile then I lay there in my bed thinking. I wanted to call him but then I didn't...we have been having alot of crappy days with each other and everything. Well in the end I decided on calling him. I call him and he's all happy...earlier he was all like poo. Well hearing how happy he was I was like DAMN! Not that I don't want him to be happy but it would be easier for me to bring up an unhappy subject if he was sad. So...I didn't bring up the subject and we talked about randomn crap for about an hour. Me yelling at the Matrix movie for being evil and dfun suff like that. Well the hour went by really quickly and it ended up being like around 10 I think, well he starts yawning and I'm just like fuck now he's tired and I don't want to talk to him, so I will just talk to him tomorrow. So I was like I called you to tlak about something but now your tired so I will talk to you tomorrow. Well he was all like now you have me curious and the whole time I'm thinking to myself it's not a good thing to be curious about. Well I was like do you want me to tell you and he's like no and I ask again do you want me to tell you, and h e's like fine. Well I asked the same question. Ryan the whole kissing with Roger thing do you really not are or are ou just saying that to make me happy? Well once again he said go ahead I don't care well I wasn't going to settle with that so I asked how do you really feal about it then I finally got out of him that he would be uncomfortable with it and I was so relived that he said that. Well that's really the end of that story we talked about how we need to communicate better about things and finally I felt relived and really happy. So now we resolved our biggest problem and we promised that we will always be straight up with each other. Now onto a different subject..wow this is going to be a long journal entry. Well anywhoozles. I really need to calm myself down, like in terms with hanging out with people. When I hang out with Kachina it seems like I don't have a b.f almost or something like that. One reason is because I am a very touchy feely person. I like to touch things I don't know why. Well I need to stop...So I'm putting it on here almost as a promise sort of vow that I will not be so touchy feely and...change the way I act in certain occasions. So if ou see me being to touchy feely and you go to my school, stop me. Sometimes I just want Ryan to surprise me...I don't know how but I just do, or just take control of a situation. i'm usually the one doing that sortof thing. It's like I'm just waiting for him to do something out of the ordinary...but that probably won't happen and I'm ok with it...I guess. I really don't know how to explain it but yah. Girls probably understand what I'm saying, guys..probably don't. I'm a person thats always in control of my situation and for once I want someone else to step up and take control of me, I don't want to be the dominant one. I WANT TO BE DOMINATED!...ok I finally got that out of my system. Well really that's all I have to put down in here for now. If anything new pops up I'll put it in here....if not then you must wait until my next entry.

-Chasmin-