:: 2003 6 December :: 1.53 am
:: Mood: content
:: Music: none

Blow me a...

:: 2003 5 December :: 7.25 pm
:: Mood: down..

Young girl, don't hide, You'll never change if u just walk away

I don't feel good. Not like the sick feeling, the empty feeling and sad feeling..

"When you're safe inside your room you tend to dream
Of a place where nothing's harder than it seems
No one ever wants or bothers to explain
Of the heartache life can bring and what it means".......

I wish I could go to the movies tonight to get out of this place...

1 *KiSs | Blow me a...

:: 2003 4 December :: 5.48 pm
:: Mood: happy
:: Music: none

4 *KiSses | Blow me a...

:: 2003 3 December :: 7.37 pm

I think I have an obsession with putting entries into my woohu ....
I was random journals surfing and I find it ironic that most people who have woohu say how much they hate their lives. The United States probably the most privilaged country in the world. We have everything. We have the power to have everything yet so many people are unhappy...
I'd give anything to know that I was going to be ok for the rest of my life. That I could financially support myself. That I wouldn't have to work my whole life just to live. As much as I want to be on my own it wont the be that easy..but I think when it gets to that time I'll still love being alone and on my own even if I don't love my life.

Blow me a...

:: 2003 3 December :: 7.25 pm

Sleeping makes me sad..does that make sense?


School was ok. After the bell rang I hung out with Steph until I went to look to see if my bus was leaving yet. I got home and because my sister didnt take me home I was locked out of the house so I sat on the steps for a while until she did get home which was around 3:30ish. I made myself some dinner arund 4 then slept till 6:30. Then I had to do the damn dishes which took me like a half hr. I'm still soooo tired. I have to study for some tests tomorrow and do alittle homework. Again, that will be saved for the 9-11 pm work time lol.

I feel pissed off/sad for some reason. Grrrrrrrr...I dont know. Tomorrow is Thursday so we only have like 2 more days until the weekend. I hope it goes by slowly. I think we're all going to go see Honey on Friday. I will go because I don't want to be in this damn house and I could use some gummy worms and popcorn..and not to mention a mountain dew freeze mmmmmm lol


I'm out

Blow me a...

:: 2003 2 December :: 7.19 pm

Lastnight I was up till like 12:30 drawing.


+face+
+hand+

I got really bored. I think I'll actually do my homework tonight so I don't have to worry bout it tomorrow.

Today was ok. After school I went to champion for like an hour and saw jesse there. Then I had an ortho and I think i'm getting my braces off in a month or so..I hope.


Congratulations! You're a black velvet!


What Drink Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla


I'm out.

6 *KiSses | Blow me a...

:: 2003 1 December :: 6.58 pm

School was ok today..one of those better days where the work isnt hard and you have some fun. Jesse wasn't here so I sat next to Steph in civics and we got to talk more. She's like totally opposite than what I originally thought she was a year ago. I'm glad I got to meet her along with other people. We were laughin and messin around. Good thing jesse wasnt there because I would have lost my bet. lol The bet is still tomorrow. I hope I win so he can dance and sing the silly bones song lol it would be sooo funny.


I'm out

Blow me a...

:: 2003 30 November :: 6.57 pm

and then there is school...
Ahh...Sunday nights always suck. Knowing that school is only a dozen hours away. I must finish my homework tonight...it can wait a few more hours. I already took a shower so I'm all set. I don't have anything else to worry about..until I have to do my homework. We'll see.

Today seemed to go by fast..everyday goes by fast...

Well, I'm heading in for the night..I'll write tomorrow probably.

later

Blow me a...

:: 2003 29 November :: 9.31 pm

Happy Birthday to my 325 entry for my woohu.

Your so pretty look at you..soooo pretty lol

Blow me a...

:: 2003 29 November :: 8.50 pm

Its uncomprehendable....how I look back a year(s) ago. Things that were happening. How I was feeling. It was only just a year ago..it seems as if it was decades ago. All the fighting and how people were so childish...things were childish things wern't right..they didn't feel right anymore. I feel like I've changed so much..Not even around the same people who I was before. Who knew that my 6th grade secret santa would become my best friend. Who knew I'd find new people that would be so accepting and would just be...everyone who I thought I would never even talk to. I've made alot of things possible that I never could have dreamed about. I've been able to look past the word group and I've been able to see people just as indivisuals... It's mind boggling...way beyond mind boggling. I feel overwhelmed in the sense that this is my life and I've been able to mold it into whatever I want yet some things won't take their new shape. I wished for a new life and in a way..I have gotten some of that.

But it doesn't change how I feel about things..inside I'm the same Amy...the same Amy whos been trying to get out of hell for years..same Amy whos been trying to prove that I can do things on my own and that I just want to be loved. That's all it comes down to in the end.

I stand alone....

Blow me a...

:: 2003 29 November :: 7.53 pm

slightly obessed with Gauge 32 -wink-
Verse 1
Woke up on the bathroom floor
Like I've done for long before
Alone I lie an empty shell
Trying to escape this hell
But where to go, and who to see
All these questions torture me
The questionns burn inside my brain
Pushing me to go insane

Chorus
Why
Do I
Even try
Nothing ever changes
Life just re-arranges
Crushing me..and why
Do I
Even care
You're not even there
You're nothing now to me
why don't you let me be

Verse 2
Is there ever something more
Something that's worth fighting for
Something that will clear my eyes
Saving me from black demise
Year's I've searched and never found
And now I'm lieing on the ground
Left alone, a broken soul
Leaving me without control

CHORUS

Verse 3
Now I wonder where you were
When everything became a blur
I passed out by the bathroom door
And fell onto the bathroom floor
The cries for help you didn't hear
Were muffled by my angered fear
So I lie upon the floor
So I will forevermore.

Blow me a...

:: 2003 29 November :: 7.29 pm
:: Mood: tired/content

I stayed up till like 2 in the morning watching "The Breakfast Club" That's one of my favorite movies. (note to self..get on dvd) I woke up like 11ish and we started cleaning and there was unpacking of various boxes. We got out the fake xmas tree and put it together and got the lights and ordiments on it and all that jazz..... So Christmas is almost here...Jesus couldn't just hold it back another month could he. Although I'm happy that we will have 2 weeks off from school...but I'm sure it will go by fast. By the way..I think I personally am an Atheist...lol yeah it does sound funny but... I still can't wait for spring break. Last year I did alot of thinking when I was there. Thinking and writing...it felt good. I hope I can put myself in that element again this time....

I do have something to live for..something ahead of me to look forward to...it just might take longer for me to get to it....gradually..baby steps...

I just have to keep telling myself there will be an end to it soon. That's what I live on, my own word. Even if I'm wrong, atleast I will have made it that far...

I feel as if I have just been swept up in complete randomnesss...

Later...

Blow me a...

:: 2003 28 November :: 8.29 pm

Turkey day was pretty much boring. Cooking followed by cleaning. Nothing much new...just same old shit. Same old shit every day.

I feel bothered. By what now, I have no clue. I feel like punching someone something.

Blow me a...

:: 2003 25 November :: 7.14 pm

I feel like shit and I'm not in a good mood. I'm so fuckin pissed off. I hate my family all fucking idiots.


argggg...

Blow me a...

:: 2003 22 November :: 8.13 pm

I'm sick of every guy letting her down. Do they even think to know how it would make her feel. Do they even think. I'm sick of always not having anyone either. Guys are jerks..thats all that needs to be said.

ARRRRRGGGG

2 *KiSses | Blow me a...