:: 2003 16 November :: 8.58 pm

Man... that's how I feel sometimes...

One More Robot - Sympathy 3000-21
by the Flaming Lips


Unit three thousand twenty one is warning
Makes a humming sound - when its circuits
Duplicate emotions - and a sense of coldness detaches
As it tries to comfort your sadness -

One more robot learns to be something more than
A machine - when it tries the way it does - make it seem
Like it can love -
Cause it's hard to say what's real - when you know the
Way you feel - is it wrong to think it's love
When it tries the way it does...

Feeling a synthetic kind of love
Dreaming a sympathetic wish -
As the lights blink faster and brighter -

One more robot learns to be something more than
A machine - when it tries the way it does - make it seem
Like it can love -
Cause it's hard to say what's real - when you know the
Way you feel - is it wrong to think it's love
When it tries the way it does...

Growl!

:: 2003 16 November :: 6.44 pm
:: Music: White Flag -- Dido

2 Grrrs | Growl!

:: 2003 16 November :: 4.26 pm

Hi!

I went to the mall after church with my mom and my sister. I was excited at first, but it got boring after I wandered JC Penney's for two hours looking for my mom.

Then I went in Hot Topic with my sister, which was awkward. I know they were trying to be nice, but people kept asking me every five minutes if I was finding everything alright. I couldn't find anything there that I liked, except these cool looking pants that were black and had all these red things hanging off them. They looked cool but I couldn't tell if they were guy's pants or girl's pants. In fact, I couldn't tell what gender anything there was supposed to be. Then I tried to look at shirts from heavy metal bands I liked in the back but they had porn mags there so I left that area.

In fact, I couldn't find anything there that I liked in the whole mall except for this plain, white hoodie at JC Penneys with no logos or anything but my mom wouldn't buy it for me because 'it's hard to take care of'. I looked at CDs but I didn't feel like buying anything with my 16 bucks. Maybe later.

A whole mall, a bazillion items, and I don't like anything. Hm. Maybe I'm getting less materialistic.

Or bored with the uncreativity that corprate america tries to present me with.

I worked out for the first time in a long time last night and now I hurt all over. I'm benching twenty pounds so far, though.

5 Grrrs | Growl!

:: 2003 15 November :: 12.47 pm
:: Music: One More Robot -- The Flaming Lips

1 Grrr | Growl!

:: 2003 13 November :: 8.11 pm
:: Music: Don't Kill You -- Lust Control

4 Grrrs | Growl!

:: 2003 13 November :: 7.52 pm
:: Music: Operation Rescue -- Lust Control

2 Grrrs | Growl!

:: 2003 11 November :: 7.22 pm

I babysat again to the hyperish kid. Fun stuff. We played the most interesting game of Battleship I've ever played. Then I tried to calm him down when his computer froze and he was convinced the computer thought he was a jerk. After that we played dress up. I was a pirate wearing a shawl. He was a knight/another pirate.

I've just begun to realized how much influence I have over this kid, though. God rarely gives me positions of responsibilty like that. Its a neat growing experience. I have to learn to be tough about drawing limits, I've found out. Its hard because I don't want to be seen as a tyrant, but I don't want to be a wishy-washy person. I also want to avoid doing some of the things some of my past teachers and such did that I don't think were very good guidence things.

His dad told me today that I was a good sport. That's reassuring.

I also need to stop thinking about myself all the time.

Nick was right... I need to smile more.

1 Grrr | Growl!

:: 2003 10 November :: 3.50 pm

Hi.

Um... bye.

See y'all at small group, I guess.

1 Grrr | Growl!

:: 2003 9 November :: 9.03 pm

I heard today that my friends stopped going to church. My dad says they're mad at God for their dad's financial problems.

I was getting kindof mad after that... I was thinking 'well why should he be kicked out of his house? why does all this painful stuff happen to me and others?' kindof like what Rachel was quoting from Joan of Arcadia earlier I guess. and my evening wasn't wasted, I visited my grandpa and grandma, who just had hip surgery. I got reminded that God's given me all this great stuff besides, like a great family and a warm house and food, and that bad stuff happens mostly because of our (my) sin,, and that whatever happens God loves everyone, including myself.

He also reminded me that God knows everything I'm going through, because of what Jesus went through.

So anyway, I'm tired. I hope Ben's party was okay.

1 Grrr | Growl!

:: 2003 9 November :: 4.28 pm

The Best Magazine in the World
HM Magazine

Well, maybe this won't turn out exactly like my Ballydowse obsession.

Lately I've been feeling like a major failure. It's a whole bunch of stuff... regret for not joining the football team... botching up my whole eigth grade year by yelling at a teacher... how selfish I've become... how I never practice anything... someone I looked up to telling me something that's been haunting me for a while... how I seem to always do the things I try my hardest not to do... how far away God seems right now...

:/ I guess I'm in depressed mode right now.

Sorry Ben about not being able to come to your birthday party, my mom wouldn't let me. But I guess I was looking forward to laying on the floor all afternoon anyway.

1 Grrr | Growl!

:: 2003 8 November :: 4.45 pm

Man, we lost....

1 Grrr | Growl!

:: 2003 6 November :: 10.12 pm

Okay, here's the whole complication:

threshershark27's station

I think there might be a few comercials for you non-SBCglobal users. Sorry.

Growl!

:: 2003 6 November :: 9.00 pm

Well, they shipped my CD. I want a ski mask to go with it.

You guys should check out Jimmy Wayne's music video, I Love You This Much. It's really cool.

Growl!

:: 2003 6 November :: 5.40 pm
:: Music: Far, Far Away -- King's X

2 Grrrs | Growl!

:: 2003 4 November :: 9.49 pm

Oh well I bought it anyway. :D

<---Lead Singer

G'night God bless

1 Grrr | Growl!