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sike-a-delic_grasshopper

:: 2007 10 September :: 11.23am

Man, doctor visits and meds are really expensive if you don't have insurance : ( Also, I got offered a jorb at hope network but its only part time. Bah. I need money.

1 Grrr | Growl!


angel_bob

:: 2007 9 September :: 11.24pm

My eulogy
Eleven years ago, my dad saw a sign advertising free kittens. He took me, Hannah and Buddy down to check them out. It had been about a year since we moved to Michigan and my mom and I really wanted a cat.

They only had two or so cats left. We chose one, a nice little black kitty and took him home.

I held him on the car ride home. Hannah said that's what made him so mean, I hogged him all to myself. I named him McHenry. McHenry, Illinois was where we had lived for the longest amount of time, three years, and the place I loved the most.

He was mean. I think it was because he was born to be a barn cat and the house was his hunting grounds. You had to watch yourself in the hallway, if you walked past him anywhere in the house and on the stairs. He would leap at your shin or your ankles and take a nice bite out of you. You couldn't pet him for too long or he bit you.

And don't even think about picking him up.

He killed a mouse once and put it by my shoes. I loved him no matter what, every one else feared for their lives.

The vet said that he might calm down if we got another cat. They had a runt named Shelby so we took her home. He beat on her for a while but he'd still beat us up.

Once we couldn't find him and Mom thought he'd snuck out of the house. I looked all over the neighborhood but couldn't find him. I came home and Mom said he had been hiding in a basket.

Shelby's kidneys began to fail and we put her to sleep when I was in sixth grade. A little while later, we got the Maine Coons: Scully and Mr. Lunt. He was a little better but still mean.

We moved and Mom had to put gloves on to get him in the cat carrier.

A few years ago, he got out of the house somehow. We couldn't find him and this time he was really lost. We put food and water outside for him and Hannah spotted him one day. He came back and he was changed. Maybe it was overnight but he'd been changing for a while. We didn't have to watch our backs anymore (although reflexively we still did) and the hallways were safe again.

We could even pick him up for a second or two.

Everyone thought they could tame him. Nathaniel's friends would come over, see him, pet him and say, "I think he likes me" right before he'd strike. And they kept denying it. "No, I think he really like ME. Of everyone else, he likes me." Like they could fix him.

Over the past year, he began to forget that we fed him. I told Mom that it wasn't that he forgot, he couldn't see. My poor kitty was nearsighted. He stuck his paw in water instead of drinking it out of the bowl. He would beg at the dog gate even when we had just fed him.

I got back from France and learned that he had begun to fall over. You would pet him and all of a sudden he would become unsteady on his feet and fall on his side. It wasn't the cat thing where they throw themselves on the floor to be petted. He was falling. He would be lying down and as you began to pet him, he'd try to stand and fall over.

It was funny at first.

I moved out. A week or so ago, I called Hannah to chat and she told me that McHenry fell down the stairs and cried about it. She seemed upset that he cried about it. Mom said she tried to pick him up but he wouldn't let her. She was going to have him put to sleep that Wednesday but she felt bad about not telling us.

Mom told me yesterday that he stopped begging to be fed around the same time. She didn't know the last time he ate or drank.

Nathaniel said he threw up water.

Mom said she couldn't stand to see him without his alpha status. He lived for that.

So on Friday, Mom said she was going to put him to sleep this weekend. I was okay as long as I didn't think about it. I told Mom to call me before it happened. Saturday morning, I got a text message from Mom.

"Mickey is crossing over the river Styx at noon today. Should I bring him home for burial?"

I told her yes then called Nick and cried. I sat on the couch and stared at the clock. 11:00. 11:01. 11:02. 11:03. 11:04. 11:05. 11:06. 11:07. 11:08. The last time I saw him, Nick was petting him. I was in a hurry to leave. I wanted to see my kitty. I called Ben and asked him to give me a ride up to Rockford.

I paced. I couldn't sit still because then I would think about it.

I called Mom. Told her I was coming. She mentioned that she thought it would be right to bring him home. We hadn't done this with Shelby or any of the other cats. But we weren't old enough to care then.

I got to the house and found Mom outside. She was holding Mickey in a Queen Amidala towel. She said she took him outside for a walk around the neighborhood. She thought he should see outside before we left.

I held him for a long time. He kept meowing. He never meowed that much.

I never ever held him for that long.

I held him on the ride to the vet.

I held him at the vet. He kept meowing. He purred a little when Hannah pet him. Mom said maybe he should walk around a little for a while. I put him down and he walked to the corner and hid under a table.

Mom said she had never been able to go in with a pet when she had to put them to sleep. We decided we were going to take him home with us when it was all done.

Mom asked if we wanted to go in with him. I should've but couldn't. She asked if we wanted her to go in. I wanted her to but couldn't ask her to. She went in.

It took forever.

In the end, it was okay. I didn't cry afterward. He was all better. His pupils were dilated. He was okay.

Mom said they couldn't find a vein. He weighed 7 lbs. He tried to bite the vet. She said it was his last hurrah.

I held him on the car ride home. We buried him under a tree in the side yard. Hannah and I made a stone with his name on it.

And I was okay.

Until I got home.

It's off and on now. It was bad yesterday but it gets better.

I just miss him.

I held him on the car ride when we first got him and I held him during the car ride at the end.

I miss my kitty.

RIP McHenry. The best worst kitty ever.

4 Grrrs | Growl!


angel_bob

:: 2007 9 September :: 11.22pm

Thinking about shaving my eyebrows as a sign of mourning. If school hadn't started and I didn't work, I totally would.

1 Grrr | Growl!


angel_bob

:: 2007 8 September :: 11.12am

Mom is putting McHenry to sleep today at noon.

2 Grrrs | Growl!


sike-a-delic_grasshopper

:: 2007 6 September :: 9.23pm

I got a backpack today. I mean the travelin' kind. Most of my shit's in it, and it's taking all my determination not to throw the rest in and walk out the door. That is all.

2 Grrrs | Growl!


angel_bob

:: 2007 6 September :: 2.55pm
:: Music: She's My Man by Scissor Sisters

I love the Scissor Sisters
The two best lines in any song ever in the history of songs:
She's my man
And we got all the balls we need


I also like:
May the best queen hold the crown
For the most bush sold on the levee



This song also wins the award for best music video ever. Not even kidding.

I love you all.

1 Grrr | Growl!


sike-a-delic_grasshopper

:: 2007 6 September :: 10.52am
:: Mood: pissed off

Hey guess what kids I got fired cause my (former) boss is a fucking idiot. See they give us these time cards to punch in and out and the other day she was asking me where I got mine from and I was like "what are you talking about thats the one you gave me" and she was all "well, when you punch in someone else's name comes up" and I was all "well I don't know why that would be but it's not my fault cause you gave me that card." And then got all pissy and was like "Well I wouldn't give you someone else's card and blah blah blah" And we went back and forth like that for awhile. So then I went to work yesterday. And after standing around for 1/2 hour cause I hadn't been assigned a job anywhere yet my boss tells me I'm fired cause of the time card thing. Yeah. Sooooo pretty much I got treated like shit for a week and chewed up and spit back out for something that I had NOTHING TO DO WITH. I called my temp service and told them what happened but I pretty much have no rights and no recourse cause I'm a temp. Don't you tell me capitalism doesn't suck.

2 Grrrs | Growl!


sike-a-delic_grasshopper

:: 2007 3 September :: 6.15pm

So I just applied to go live on a bus and plant trees and teach kids about loving the earth. It's going down next spring. Here's the site: www.commonvision.org

I am crossing my fingers really really hard.

[edit]
You know, if my stupid job is gonna make me stay up all night, they need to actually provide work so I can get paid. I'm sure as hell not doing this for my health. Cause that's starting to go down the tubes on account of I can't hang with these hours very well.

5 Grrrs | Growl!


ears

:: 2007 3 September :: 10.31am
:: Mood: thoughtful
:: Music: Jeremy Camp

Time does not heal all wounds.
GOD heals all wounds. (But the scars still hurt and I wish He would get rid of those too.)

Growl!


sike-a-delic_grasshopper

:: 2007 2 September :: 4.53am

So I went to sleep at 10 last night and only meant to sleep for a few hours, cause thats how I sleep on this fucked up schedule. But I just woke up a couple minutes ago. Which means I fucked up my already fucked schedule. Dammit! I hate working 3rd shift.

Growl!


angel_bob

:: 2007 31 August :: 9.37pm

Mom was apparently going to put McHenry to sleep last Wednesday but she didn't want to do it without telling us.

He falls down the stairs and cries now. Poor kitty. He's not even old enough to die...

5 Grrrs | Growl!


angel_bob

:: 2007 29 August :: 7.41pm

We got our grades from France today. Finally. I did well.

1 Grrr | Growl!


sike-a-delic_grasshopper

:: 2007 29 August :: 4.59pm

So I started a new job yesterday and it sucks GIANT DONKEY NARDS!!!! Man what I wouldn't do for a job that doesn't blow. Or to not need to have a job. And yes, it does suck and blow simultaneously. I work in a factory packing boxes all day. Or all night I should say. It's 3rd shift which makes it even suckier. So now my sleep pattern's all fucked up. I'm going on 2 hours of sleep today because I passed out as soon as I got home but then I had to get up and try and find a job that sucks less. And then after that I couldn't go back to sleep. So hopefully I can before I have to go back to work.

However, it won't be too much longer before I can get the hell out of here.

Growl!


sike-a-delic_grasshopper

:: 2007 28 August :: 10.33am

I got published. Sort of. It's a paper I wrote for an english class and some other people liked it apparently. Here's the link if anyone's interested.

http://isabellamagazine.com/NonFiction/Issue1/Default.aspx

1 Grrr | Growl!


angel_bob

:: 2007 27 August :: 11.04am

I overslept and missed my first class so I shall use this opportunity to do what I always do, talk about my classes.

I had 17 credits this semester but I just dropped a class so now I'm down to 14. This semester is pretty much just catching up on requirements.

On Mondays and Thursdays, I have Earth Environments at 10:50. This class seems exactly like my 9th grade science class. The professor is married to my fourth grade teacher. It's like a timewarp. That's the one I missed this morning.

I also have Intro to Communication at 12:15. This is a requirement so I don't really care. I'm trying to see if I can avoid buying the book at all. It's going well so far. I just wrote a min 2 page paper last night that turned into 4 pages.

After that I had a French class. I dropped it. Gasster taught it, not Pichot and her idea of contemporary Francophone literature was African colonization books from the fifties to the eighties. It was horrible. Plus the books were very difficult.

Then tonight I have Image Editing. It's my only fun class. It is way too easy. During the first class, we changed a picture to grayscale! And that was our assignment.

Tuesdays, I have Humanities at 8am. I have it with McMillan who is pretty much the easiest prof at AQ. This is another required class. It's actually a sophomore required class that I didn't take last year because of stupid France.

Then I have my lab at 1:40. He says we'll watch movies and walk along streams. That's as hard as that class gets really. The walking.

Tuesday nights I have my first quad. It's Theology of Christian Marriage and it is with the hardest theo prof. Yay for me. It runs from 6:30-10:30. My first paper, due tomorrow, is supposed to be 5 pages of what I expect marriage to be like. It is going to be a lot of blabbing.

Wednesdays I don't have any classes. I just work.

Thursdays are just like Mondays except I don't have Theology.

And on Friday, all I have is Humanities and then I work.

I work on Tuesdays and Thursdays too.

So yeah. This semester sucks. I have to give two TAPED speeches eventually in my communication class. It shouldn't be too bad. It is a required course so most people should be able to get As.

I'm going to go try to find clothes now. I love you all.

P.S. Nick's grandmother isn't doing very well. Please think happy thoughts for her. Thanks.

2 Grrrs | Growl!

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