Blurring And Stirring The Truth And The Lies

 

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I Won't Be Broken Again

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:: 2004 29 January :: 11.29 am
:: Mood: crappy

I dont feel good. My tummy hurts and I want food but I dont wanna throw up. I ate breakfast and I kept it down... but I dont know if I can again.. :(

I've got to breathe


:: 2004 26 January :: 3.24 pm
:: Mood: anxious

The truth
You know how I said before that I had an issue that I would like to converse with one person... well I can never talk to her... so I'll just put it in here................ k.. here goes... I really really think... that I... am kinda.. going.... bi...

I've got to breathe


:: 2004 23 January :: 5.16 pm
:: Mood: determined
:: Music: No

Conversing about patience with Brandi
I'm the one who doesnt useinternet slang...

Brandi: wanna see what i wrote

Brandi: its kind of big

Becca: sure, but I'm guess I have no choice

Brandi: it gets really stupid i couldnt think of anything so i put what my mom tells me all the time about the god part

Brandi: understanding you is impossiable u ditch ur friends who have done every thing for you and yet u still try to belive that know one loves you and no one cares i used to love u like a sister and i was there for you an so were more of ur friends and teachers and what do we get back lies and a sack of shit thrown in our faces ... i hope this gets to you because ive tried but all i got was u cryen....wow u have really screwed up this is something u cant fix u say i have no idea what im talking about and that i dont know how it feels well the same thing happened to me no one belived me and no one cared but then u lie and get ur way u get every one 2 hate me wow u dont know how bad u have hurt me and this is just too much i hope u have fun in living ur life how u wanted it to be all of ur old friends hating you and u going with what u hate live it up people dont live forever ..... ur lucky u are living now god gave u a chance to live and u spit in his face hmmm makes me think of how much u do care about ur old friends ..the ones u say u "love" im going to leave u to ur new life now ....cuz its soooooo much bette then it was

Becca: She hurt me too you know

Brandi: then write to her 2

Becca: All of the yelling and all of the crying wont help. Confront her and all youll get is more pain.

Becca: I dont need anymore

Brandi: booty?

Becca: I dont want it, I dont need it.


I was a long day, the last thing that I need is this, really. I've tried to forget. Everything. But I learned that that it isnt healthy. I can forgive, but I wont forget.

I've got to breathe


:: 2004 22 January :: 2.59 pm
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: I dont wanna grow up, I'm a toys R us kid

| @m $uch @ fUcK uP
I'm really tired. I got my first day of gym today... it was really fun. The warm-ups are gay and my locker came with a bag... it was neat. Jill is in my class so we made a couple of new friends and a girl wanted to steal my GIR boxers... it was odd. I ran. But other then that it was neat. neeeeeeeeaaaaaaaattttttt. Yeah.... other then that I'm bored and I have no homework that I can remember. And even if I remembered I wouldnt do it... just because I dont want to. I usually finish it the next day of skool...

In my tenth grade drawing class we were using chalk pastels and I had a line across my shirt because of the goddamn board... it was funny because I had to changes my cloths, into my Batman shirt from gym... and I was walking around for the rest of the day in nice pants and a gray Batman shirt. People thought I was nutz... and my ex kept looking at me like I was crazy... but maybe thats because I was arguing with myself over weather or not I should go out of my, or should I say our, way to put my algebra book away, I didnt, though... its still in my bookbag with all of my neat-o stuff that smells like high lighter and the eighty different pops I bought today and only drank half of.


Yeah, I'm tired. And I need go sleep.

THE NAPKINS WILL OVER TAKE YOU IN YOUR SLUMBER!!!!!!

eep.

Yeah no kidding.

~Becca~

I've got to breathe


:: 2004 18 January :: 3.02 pm
:: Mood: chipper
:: Music: t.a.t.u

A
I got an A on the pikature that I drawed. YAY! It was of an old friend in a cracked throne. It's cool. I like it, yay.

I've got to breathe


:: 2004 17 January :: 11.10 pm
:: Mood: content

Why do people discriminate against gay people? Is it because they're different? Is it because they're afriad of things that are different? Is it because they're small minded and deathly afraid of changes in the universe? Love is love and no one should want to change that, you should be able to be happy to know that at least those people can find love. Its bull because no one can change who they fall in love with.

5 I can't keep going under | I've got to breathe


:: 2004 17 January :: 3.16 pm
:: Mood: blah

Does your daily agenda consist of video games, video games, and more games?: some days
Do you enjoy pissing people off for your own entertainment?: yes I do
Involved in any extracurricular activities?: French club
Does acting "depressed" amuse you?: ...
Do you think you're cool?: Oh so very kool?
Cooler than me?: probably no
[Favorites.[
Food?: Pancakes
Book?: My Sweet Audrina
Amusement?: staplers
Movie?: Freddy Vs Jason and Where The Heart Is
Music genre?: Rock, punk, and some pop.
Band/Group/Artist?: Dio, T.a.T.u., and Evanescence
Person?: Mom
Celebrity?: Sarah Michelle Gellar, Holly Marie Combs, Will Ferrel and Robin Williams
Place to be?: My room
Store in the mall?: Spencers
Screen Name?: Owned Squishy
Member of a band?: Ronnis James Dio
Store outside the mall?: Thrit Stores
Colour?: Blue
Animal?: kitties and doggies and horsies
Sport?: air hockey
Drink?: root beer
Restaurant?: Ihop?
T.V. Channel?: 3, theWB, and 44, The-N
Magazine?: Seventeen
Writing Utensil?: pen
Kitchen Utensil?: spork
Friend?: Kelly, Brandi and Brandi,
Deodorant brand?: ... StuffThatWorks
Shoe company?: CheapShit
Clothing item you have?: my pants?
Number?: 16
Word?: Spiffy
Fruit?: strawberries
Vegetable?: broccoli
Song?: Throw Away Children
Moment?: ...
Inside Joke?: I peed
Person to make fun of?: Brandi, she is such a whore
Phrase?: \"Hey Mr. GrumpyGills.\"
Smoothie Flavour?: Strawberry banana
Actor?: will ferrel and robin williams
Actress?: sarah michelle geall and holly marie combs
Cartoon Character?: GIR
Muppet?: Ms. Piggy
Sesame Street Character?: ..heee hee... Elmoooo
Kind of cookie?: choco chip
Relative?: Mom
[Yes or No?]
Cake?: no
Ice Cream?: yes
Meat?: yes
Food, in general?: sure...
Crayons?: YES
Little kid stuff?: yes..
Writing?: yes
Flying on airplanes?: no
Picnics?: no
Summer nights?: no
Llamas?: yes
Hanson?: no
Intense Conversations?: sure
Racism?: no
Violence?: no
Suicide?: sure
Murder?: no
Discrimination?: no
[Have You Been To...]
The North Pole?: Yes,
Tahiti?: no
Paris?: no
New York City?: no
San Francisco?: no
Chicago?: no

I've got to breathe


:: 2004 17 January :: 2.55 pm
:: Mood: chipper
:: Music: Something

ehh
What is your name?:Rebecca Alicia Miller
Are you named after anyone?:not that I know od
What's your screename?:LittleMsScareAl1
Would you name a child of yours after you?:No
If you were born a member of the opposite sex what would your name be?:John Alfred
If you could switch names with a friend who would it be?:Shayna or Kelly
Are there any mispronounciations/typos that ppl do w/ your name constantly?:Beckie, Rebekah
Would you drop your last name if you became famous?:no, I'd change my name completely
Basics
Your gender::Female
Straight/Gay/Bi::...
Single?:Yep
If not, do you want to be?:No
Birthdate::09/06/89
Your age::14
Age you act::5, 14, and 46
Age you wish you were::18
Your height::5"6'
Eye color::brown
Happy with it?:No, I want green like my moms
Hair color::blonde
Happy with it?:I wouldnt dye it that way if I weren't
Lefty/righty/ambidextrous::righty
Your living arrangement::mommy daddy sister brother three dogs house
Your family::^
Have any pets?:^^
Whats your job?:None
Piercings?:ears
Tattoos?:no
Obsessions?:staples
Addictions?:Halls Fruit Breezers
Do you speak another language?:Beckonics
Have a favorite quote?:"X! FOR ZORO!! Wait..."
Do you have a webpage?:Yep
Deep Thoughts About Life and You in it
Do you live in the moment?:nope
Do you consider yourself tolerant of others?:yep
Do you have any secrets?:yep
Do you hate yourself?:yep
Do you like your handwriting?:nope
Do you have any bad habits?:I bite my nails
What is the compliment you get from most people?:"I liked your english paper"
If a movie was made about your life, what would it be called?:Who The Fuck Would Make This A Movie?
What's your biggest fear?:everything
Can you sing?:yes...
Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool?:yes...
Are you a loner?:yes...
What are your #1 priorities in life?:friends family and skool
If you were another person, would you be friends with you?:yes, I'm a good friend
Are you a daredevil?:no
Is there anything you fear or hate about yourself?:my constant sarcasim
Are you passive or agressive?:I can be both
Do you have a journal?:yes both online and off
What is your greatest strength and weakness?:My persistance is my strength and weakness
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?:everything
Do you think you are emotionally strong?:on the outside, but on the inside I'm cryin and screaming all the time.
Is there anything you regret doing/not doing in life?:Hurting everyone I hurt
Do you think life has been good so far?:no
What is the most important lesson you've learned from life?:Not to stress about it because no one gets out alive anyway
What do you like the most about your body?:my face
And least?:everything else
Do you think you are good looking?:no
Are you confident?:On the outside
What is the fictional character you are most like?:Piper
Are you perceived wrongly?:yes
Do You...
Smoke?:no
Do drugs?:no
Read the newspaper?:sometimes
Pray?:no
Go to church?:no
Talk to strangers who IM you?:yeah
Sleep with stuffed animals?:yes I do
Take walks in the rain?:yep
Talk to people even though you hate them?:yep
Drive?:no
Like to drive fast?:no
Would or Have You Ever?
Liked your voice?:yeah, I still do
Hurt yourself?:^
Been out of the country?:no
Eaten something that made other people sick?:no
Been in love?:yes
Done drugs?:no
Gone skinny dipping?:no
Had a medical emergency?:no
Had surgery?:no
Ran away from home?:no
Played strip poker?:no
Gotten beaten up?:no
Beaten someone up?:yes
Been picked on?:yes
Been on stage?:yes
Slept outdoors?:yes
Thought about suicide?:yes
Pulled an all nighter?:yes
If yes, what is your record?:8 days
Gone one day without food?:yes
Talked on the phone all night?:yes
Slept together with the opposite sex w/o actually having sex?:yes
Slept all day?:yes
Killed someone?:no
Made out with a stranger?:no
Had sex with a stranger?:no
Thought you're going crazy?:still do
Kissed the same sex?:... no
Done anything sexual with the same sex?:no
Been betrayed?:yes
Had a dream that came true?:yes
Broken the law?:yes
Met a famous person?:yes
Have you ever killed an animal by accident?:spiders an bugs and a frog once...
On purpose?:no
Told a secret you swore you wouldn't tell?:yes
Stolen anything?:yes
Been on radio/tv?:yes
Been in a mosh-pit?:yes
Had a nervous breakdown?:all the time
Bungee jumped?:no
Had a dream that kept coming back?:yes
Beliefs
Belive in life on other planets?:yeah!
Miracles?:Sometimes
Astrology?:yes
Magic?:yes
God?:no
Satan?:no
Santa?:yes
Ghosts?:yes
Luck?:yes
Love at first sight?:no
Yin and yang (that good cant exist w/o bad)?:yes
Witches?:yes
Easter bunny?:yes
Believe its possible to remain faithful forever?:yes
Believe theres a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow?:yes
Do you wish on stars?:no
Deep Theological Questions
Do you believe in the traditional view of Heaven and Hell?:no
Do you think God has a gender?:female, or really gay guy
Do you believe in organized religion?:no
Where do you think we go when we die?:we dont die
Friends
Do you have any gay/lesbian friends?:yep
Who is your best friend?:Brandi, Kelly, Missa, Amanda
Who's the one person that knows most about you?:Brandi, we're always on the same page
What's the best advice that anyone has ever given to you?:Personal...
Your favourite inside joke?:I peed
Thing you're picked on most about?:my friends
Who's your longest known friend?:Brandi
Newest?:Sara
Shyest?:Amanda
Funniest?:Brandi and Kelly
Sweetest?:Amanda and Kelly
Closest?:Brandi Kelly and Amanda
Weirdest?:Kelly and Brandi
Smartest?:Amanda
Ditziest?:Kelly and me
Friends you miss being close to the most?:Brandi an Kelly
Last person you talked to online?:Brandi
Who do you talk to most online?:Brandi
Who are you on the phone with most?:Brandi
Who do you trust most?:Kelly
Who listens to your problems?:Kelly and Amanda
Who do you fight most with?:I dont
Who's the nicest?:All of them except brandi, she throws pudding.
Who's the most outgoing?:Brandi
Who's the best singer?:Kelly
Who's on your shit-list?:... ?
Have you ever thought of having sex with a friend?:Aheh...
Who's your second family?:Brandi
Do you always feel understood?:No.. I make jokes then theyre all like... huh?
Who's the loudest friend?:Brandi
Do you trust others easily?:no
Who's house were you last at?:Brandi's
Name one person who's arms you feel safe in::heh...
Do your friends know you?:not all the time
Friend that lives farthest away::Brandi
Love and All That
Do you consider love a mistake?:most of the time
What do you find romantic?:the stars?
Turn-on?:no
Turn-off?:no
First kiss?:In front of my door
If someone u had no interest in had interest in dating u how would u feel?:loved
Do you prefer knowing someone before dating them or going:... depends
Have u ever wished it was more socially acceptable 4 a girl 2 ask a guy out:no
Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractiv:...
Do you think the opposite sex finds you good looking?:no.
What is best about the opposite sex?:nothing
What is the worst thing about the opposite sex?:I dunno...
What's the last present someone gave you?:a photo album
Are you in love?:no
Do you consider your significant other hot?:...
Who Was the Last Person...
That haunted you?:Bill
You wanted to kill?:I wont put that
That you laughed at?:Brandi
That laughed at you?:Brandi
That turned you on?:...
You went shopping with?:Gramma Mom Wendy and John
That broke your heart?:Bill
To disappoint you?:Bill
To ask you out?:Bill
To make you cry?:Patience
To brighten up your day?:Kelly
That you thought about?:..
You saw a movie with?:Mom and Dad
You talked to on the phone?:Brandi
You talked to through IM/ICQ?:Brandi
You saw?:Mom
You lost?:Shayna
Right This Moment...
Are you going out?:no
Will it be with your significant other?:no
Or some random person?:no
What are you wearing right now?:jammies
Body part you're touching right now::leg...
What are you worried about right now?:skool on tuesday, new classes
What book are you reading?:White Oleander, again
What's on your mousepad?:booze, thanks mom.
Use 5 words to describe how you're feeling::cold, bored, tired, achy, twitchy
Are you bored?:^
Are you tired?:^^
Are you talking to anyone online?:no
Are you talking to anyone on the phone?:no
Are you lonely or content?:content
Are you listening to music?:no

Really Long Survey (over 200) brought to you by BZOINK!

I've got to breathe


:: 2004 16 January :: 11.36 am

I see:The computer screen
I feel:content?
I hear:snoring
I smell:winter
I find:that no matter what I do I do it wrong
I want:To give everyone cookies with jello, and die
I have:no patience for children
I wish:I didnt have to be here
I hate:not understanding what I want and why.
I miss:Ms. B
I fear:everything
I crave:chips
I search:for answers
I wonder:why I am who I am
I regret:nothing
I love:someone my parents wouldnt understand
I long:for understanding and love
I am:what no one thinks I am
I come:when I want
I always:cry when I fall
I am not:who you think I am
I believe:I can be who I want and people should accept that.
I cringe:when my family makes bi/lesbien/gay jokes, and when people touch me
I dance:alone
I sing:alone
I learn:quickly
I do not:want to die alone
I succeed:in choosing what I want to see
I fail:algebra finals..
I fight:for my right and the rights of others
I write:things people dont understand
I give:what I can
I win:when I need to
I never:do anything bad
I confuse:everyone
I listen:to everything
I take:a long time to understand

I statements brought to you by BZOINK!

About You:
What's your Full name(first,middle,and last):Rebecca Alicia Miller
When's your b-day::September sixth
How old r u::fourteen
What's your fav. band::t.a.t.u., Dio, and evanescence
What's your Fav. Song::Taking over me and Throw Away Children
What's your fav. T.V. Show::Buffy, Charmed, Tru Calling, and Glimore Girls
What's your fav. Color::Blur
Semi Personal Stuff:
Who r u crushing on and or dating::Now if I were to put that then the people who read this would know and that would be bad.
Do u honestly think you love them::yes
Name 3 things you are::alone, cold, tired
Name 3 things you arent::fake, alive, warm
What's the greatest Strenght:writing/saying what I feel
What's your greatest Weakness:feeling remorse
Who is your Hero::didnt we already cover this?
Why are they so great::and this?
Name one thing you want to do before you Die::this too?
Your Honest opinion of me:
Am I Nice::uh-huh...
Do I yell at you a lot::yeah...
Do i Listen to your problems::I swear I've seen all this before
What's one thing you would change about me::...
What's one thing you like about me::...
Just Question that's come to mind:
If you stuck on an Island and you could have 3 friends who would they be::...
If you still had your friends and got to bring 3 things what are they::...
Are you Funny or Serious::...
Quiet or Loud::...
Shy or outgoing:...
Just a Few last minute Questions:
Whose's your best friend::Brandi, Kelly, and Amanda
how long have you known them::since 6th grade
Would you die for them::yep
Do you think they would die for you::I dont know, probly not, I bet I piss them off
If your friend were you jump off a bridge where would you be::Right behind them with a lifesaver
Do you like your Parents::yeah
Do they spoil you::no
Would you ever die for a fam. member::yep
if So who::All of them cept Jenny
what's your Fav. Hoilday::Samhein
Do you like Apple Die::!
Are you a fan of sports::no
What's your favorite Sports team::no
Have you ever met someone famous::Yes.

Just for you!!!! brought to you by BZOINK!

You know you want to
Who do you love::Like I've said before...
Who do you Hate::a lot of people right now
Why do you hate them::because they anger me.
Where do you live::Eastpointe
What is your name::Becca
How old are you::14
If still in school, do you like yours::Its east Detroit, whats there to like?
Love Life
How many boyfriends have you had in the past year::1
Alltogether::...?
How far have you gone::...
Do you love them::no
Do you Think there the one::No
How many 'Dreams' have you had with them::One
Piss you off
Who::Wendy
Why::she a whore
When did you start hating Him/Her::She's my older sister.
Where?::in the bathtub with a pistol

Life brought to you by BZOINK!

What fictional character do you feel is most like you?:Piper
Do you tend to impose your beliefs on others?:No...
Where do you see yourself in 10 years?:autopsy table hopefully
Use three words to describe yourself.:I. Dont. Wanna.
What are the best three classes you've ever had?:American hist (the one with the teacher who didnt touch us), english both eigth and ninth
Do you agree with "Speak English or get the hell out" stickers?:YES!
What career would you ultimately like to attain?:Psycologist
As a kid, what was your favorite drink? How about snack?:milk and gram crackers
What is your favorite drink now? Snack?:milk and gram crackers
Should homosexual marriages be allowed in this country?:yes, everywhere. Love is love and you cant change that.
Should marrying more than one person be allowed in this country?:...no
What time do you usually go to bed?:whenever I pass out I guess...
Do you believe in God?:no
When cuddling, what body part do you most enjoy being touched?:neck
Sleep on your side, stomach, or back?:side
Should prostitution be legalized?:Yeah because then my sister would be less paranoid
And what about drugs?:no
If you could automatically learn any instrument, what would it be?:guitar
Is there anyone who has passed away that you wish you could speak to again?:grampa miller
Are there any questions you wish I'd asked (I'll put them in the next one:Wheres the tuna?

Pretty random brought to you by BZOINK!

I've got to breathe


:: 2004 16 January :: 11.21 am

What comes to mind when you hear..
..snow?:pain
..rain?:wet
..tornado?:Auntie Em
..summer love?:stupid
..Jon?:stupid
..Mike?:no
..Shea?:no
..banana?:sure
..dizzy?:every time I see them
..Laura?:No
..Juan?:no
..car?:no
..white?:no
..peppermint?:no
..New Found Glory?:no
..placebo?:no
..orange juice?:no
..candid camera?:no
..sister?:no
..brother?:no
..hate?:no
..school?:no
..President?:no
..football?:fooball
..rap?:no
..pop?:no
..rock?:no
..punk?:no
..sex?:I dont wanna talk aboot it
..death?:please
..baby?:eh
..duuude?:totaaallllyyy
..the end?:yay

The Survey Where You Say The First Word That Comes To Mind. Yay. brought to you by BZOINK!

Basic Crap
Name:Becca
Birthday:09/06/89
Nationality:human
Zodiac Sign:virgo
Who did these things last
Called You:Gramma
Made you cry:Patience
Yelled at you:Wendy
Have you ever
Been to California:No
Been to Hawaii:No
Danced Naked:NO
Took Naked photos:NO
Had A preminition:... I dont know.
stalked someone:Yes
milked a cow:No
Which would you prefer
cats or dogs:both
Walmart or target:walmort
god or satan:buddah
good or evil:good
Last _____
song you heard:Nas Ne Dagoniat
song you sung:How Soon Is Now?
movie you watched:Swimfan...
oh really ? was it good?:No
last noise you heard:sobs
last smell you smelled:strawberries
last thing you ate:cheerios
Favorites
band:t.a.t.u., Dio, Evanescence
movie:Where The Heart Is
song:Throw Away Children
color:blue
food:chicken alfredo
fruit:strawberries
candy:cough drops...
store:Spencers
sport:Air Hockey
sport team:Wings
actor:Will Ferral,Robin Williams
actoress:Sarah Michelle Gellar, Holly-Marie Combs
Last few
famous guy or girl you would fuck:heh heh..
food you would eat for the rest of your life:pizza and tuna
bye:Okee

long survey brought to you by BZOINK!

I've got to breathe


:: 2004 16 January :: 10.50 am
:: Mood: content
:: Music: Are You Happy Now?

Flem
Okay, in the previous entry I mentioned something about a problem in which I would like to tell Kelly, because I know that she would understand... but I think she's mad at me... so I guees I cant tell her now... when I was going to. I really hate this you know. I hate being comfused, I like just understanding what I want, and when I cant understand how I feel about something it gets fustrating.... really really fustrating. But today I feel really peaceful. I dont know why, maybe its because of Patience... I got the things I wanted to say off of my chest... Or maybe its because I'm making myself numb so I dont cry about my D+ on my Algebra Final... or maybe its because I'm finally figuring out what I want. I am so happy I found my voice, but I need to know what to do with it. I really really wanna talk to Kelly, but I seriously think she's mad at me. I need to talk to Bill. I dont know why, but I really really want to talk to him. Tell him that he isnt a bad person ad thats not why we broke up. I need to tell him that he isnt a horrid boyfriend, just that I was scared of ending up like my parents with him, before he hurts himself. -_-

I bored now, I play gamezez now. Buh-bye..
Becca

I've got to breathe


:: 2004 15 January :: 2.29 pm
:: Mood: confused

Who Will You Marry? by Sari
Name
DateJanuary 25, 2044
SpouseJohnny Depp
Price of Wedding$1,109,586
Created with quill18's MemeGen!




sorry guys, looks like I get him...

2 I can't keep going under | I've got to breathe


:: 2004 15 January :: 2.02 pm
:: Mood: crushed
:: Music: T.a.T.u.

I made a mistake
Why do I keep kidding myself? It's bullshit really. I fucking hate it. I can't believe I feel this why when I said I never would. When I denied it everytime someone accused me. What in the hell is wrong with me? I wasnt lying before, but I am now. I wanna tell Kelly, but I cant. I cant tell Brandi. She wouldnt understand. Amanda... I would tell her, and I dont know why I dont. Maybe it's because I dont know. I'm not to sure as to why and everything but I still dont know... maybe thats just what it is though, being unsure as to.... well... what you want. I dont know. But I wish that I could just forget, sewmy eyes close.

I've got to breathe


:: 2004 15 January :: 1.09 pm
:: Mood: cold
:: Music: T.a.T.u.

Bored, really.
Show Me Love

This was an accident
Not the kind were sirens sound
Never even noticed
We're suddenly crumbling

Tell me how you've never felt
Delicate or innocent
Do you still have doubts that
Us having makes any sense

Tell me nothing ever counts
Lashing out or breaking down
Still somebody loses 'cause
There's no way to turn around

Staring at your photograph
Everything now in the past
Never felt so lonely
I wish that you could show me love

Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
'Til You open the door

Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
'Til I'm up off the floor


Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
'Til its Inside my pores

Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
'Til I'm Screaming for More

Random acts of mindlessness
Commonplaces ocurrences
Chances and surprises
Another state of consciousness

Tell me nothing ever counts
Lashing out or breaking down
Still somebody loses 'cause
There's no way to turn around

You play games, I play tricks
Girls and girls but you're the one
Like the game of pick-up-sticks
Played by f-cking lunatics

Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
'Til You open the door

Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
'Til I'm up off the floor


Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
'Til its Inside my pores

Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
Show Me Love
'Til I'm Screaming for More

Show me love, Show me love
Give me all that i want

Show me love, Show me love
Give me all that i want

Show me love, Show me love
Give me all that i want

Show me love, Show me love
'Til Im Screaming for More


HOW SOON IS NOW

I am the son, I am the heir
Of a shyness that is criminally vulgar
I am the sond I am the heir
Of nothing in particular

You shut your mouth
How can you say
I go about the things the wrong way?
I am human and iI need to be loved
Just like everybody else does

I am the son, I am the heir
Of a shyness that is criminally vulgar
I am the sond I am the heir
Of nothing in particular

You shut your mouth
How can you say
I go about the things the wrong way?
I am human and iI need to be loved
Just like everybody else does

There's a club if You'd like to go
You could meet somebody who really loves you
And You go and You stand on your Own
And You leave on your Own
And You go home, and you cry
And you want to die.

When you say it's gonna happen now
What exactly do You mean?
See I've already waited too long
And all my hope is GONE.

You shout your mouth
How can you say
I go about the things the wrong way
I am human and I need to be loved
Just like everybody does




I love those songs... I know I know. But I do. FUck off. Or not whatever..

I cant believe that we had skool today. I was frozen while taking my algebra mid-term. It was gay. Really. It was. I have a problem though that I dont really think that I'm going to put down in here because I dont want my friends to know until I can tell them... but I'm not even sure...


Enough with the cryptics... I'm really really cold. cold and kind of pissed off. But for another reason, not to mention either.

I'm gonna miss Ms. Orsini... She said I was a really good writer because I wrote the truths no one wants to see... like about molestation, rape, and other scnadals that can be caused by upbringings... I got an A on every assignment in there almost. I'd like to thank Missie and Mr. Blake( that fucking pervert who gave me my voice) for that though. I would have never gotten my voice if it weren't for them, for what happened and the events to follow. I would have never realized that I am a very opinionated person. I DO HAVE EMOTION!!! YAY! Yeah. I also realized what a good friend I am because I stood up. I stood up because I knew what was right and I wasnt going to let anyone tell me otherwise.

If I ever wanted to have a good yell, however, I would only choose one person. And I think that everyone knows who that would be... Mr. Blake. If he thinks that he can get away with touching us and what he did to Missa, he is highly mistaken. I swear, when I can afford my own lawyer...

If I ever got a chance to say I'm sorry to someone, it would be Bill. Because we dated and all I did was push him away. I really wish I wouldnt have.

If I ever got to see any of my old friends, it would be Alyssa. She was really cool. And I want to know if she still cusses.

If I ever got to make amends with someone ................................................................................................................................................ I wouldnt because I regret nothing except pushing the only person who loved me when he didnt have to away.



Well that was fun and neat-o. "The knowlage, it fills me, it is neat."

Peace out,

-Becca

I've got to breathe


:: 2004 14 January :: 2.34 pm

Name?:Becca
Age?:14
Sex?:female
Height?:5'6"
Weight?:I dunno...
Hair?:blonde
Eyes?:brown
Piercings?:ears three times on the right once on the left
Tattoings?:no?
Boyfriend?:Nope.
Girlfriend?:Nope
Dog?:Three
Cat?:I wish
Gerbil?:THAT WOULD BE SO COOL
Fish?:Fish are friends not food!
Do you like electric outlets?:sure
How about plugs?:sure...
What's your favorite band?:Dio and t.A.T.u.
Do you wish Hilary Duff would JUST SHUT UP?:Yes I do
Do you think Aaron Carter is gay?:Yes! YES I DO
How about Nick?:SUPER GAY
Do you read Weekly World News?:... no
Is it awesome or what?:sure
Are you sitting in the dark?:no
Do you often sit at home, all alone...in the dark?:yes!
Do you enjoy that pastime?:Yes!
Do you hate me?:Yes!... I mean no?
Are you madly in love with me then?:Oh god yes. I cannot deny that ass either?
Is the Cookie Monster overrated?:Elmo is so much hotter.
Is your IQ above 60?:I doubt it
Is 'Chicken of the Sea' chicken, or tuna?:FISH ARE FRIENDS NOT FOOD GOD DAMMIT
Jessica Simpson, dumb, or just raised by poodles?:the poodle thing, yes.
Have you ever been bitten by a turtle?:yes
Are you listening to music right now?:yes
Are you talking to someone right now?:no
Have you ever tried roofing?:no
What does NFL stand for?:national fag league
Do you know what a childproofer is?:yes
Have you ever watched Animal Cop, or Animal Precint on Animal Planet?:yes
Do you have a life?:no
Do you like it?:yes
Is your life booooring?:no
Is Chad Micheal Murray like so, like, totally, like hott?:he was a dork (whale penis) in high skool... and yes
Do you watch the Gimore Girls every week, and never miss an episode?:yes no that Buffy is over
Do you want a Dollop of Daisy?:WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
Does Ace Ventura turn you on?:Oh yeah
Have you ever sat on your fat ass, on the computer for 6+ hours?:Yes
Who's your idol?:Sarah Michelle Gellar
Doesn't Simon Cowell have the BEST accent?:Yes
Is he gay?:No
Is there some secret conspiracy between Ruben and Randy?:Yes?
Can you NOT WAIT for the next American Idol?:WHO?
Do you own Tivo?:No
Do you know what a futon is?:Yes
Do you know what DDR stands for?:dance dance revolution
Do you consider yourself a punk?:No
Goth?:No
Prep?:No
Jock?:No
Loser?:No
Milkman?:YES! HOW DID YOU KNOW?
Have you ever wished you were a paperboy/girl?:No
Do you think Bill Gates really invented Windows?:I think that once he creates a monopoly he'll have us by the motherboards
Or was it Whoopi Goldberg?:IT WAS HER!
Who would name a child Whoopi?:I would
Do you plan on having a child?:Yes
Will you name he/she Whoopi?:Yes she/he will
Did you get made fun of in elementary school?:No
Was it because you were named Whoopi?:No...
Am I even spelling Whoopi right?:Yes
Is Clay Aiken too skinny?:his hair is too big for him....
Did you own Good Charlotte's first cd, BEFORE their second came out?:... The one guy looks like a bird. He wouldnt eat the rock. I was pissed off.
Are you a poser?:No. But I AM A HUMAN
Have you ever been called a poser?:No
Do you think I'm a loser because I spend 30+mins at a time making these?:No
I am a loser. I admit it.:No I love your shoes
Be cool stay in school.:Okay
Give hugs, not drugs!:Okay
Is Shaq overrated?:Who?
Do you go around stomping in Air Force Ones?:What?
Are you a motha fucking P.I.M.P?:Oh yeah?
Do you have any clue whatsoever what the hell I'm going off about?:No
How aboot, are you Canadian, eh?:CANANADA IS COOL!!! No.
Do you think I'm racist?:sure...
Well I'm not. Go screw a cow.:nah thats alright
Did you consider screwing a cow?: not recently
Did you act upon it?:No
Do you eat peoples eyeballs?:No..
Can you believe, I, of all people am on my school's basketball team?:GO YOUSE?
Wow.:Cheese

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I've got to breathe

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