Blurring And Stirring The Truth And The Lies

 

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I Won't Be Broken Again

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VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2004 14 January :: 2.30pm
:: Mood: cold

stuff
[x] Part 1 -- The Basics [x]
What's your name? :::Becca
Birthplace :::a hopsickle
Age :::14
Age you act :::5
Current location :::home
Eye color :::brown
Hair color :::blonde
Right, lefty or ambidextrous? :::righty
Zodiac sign? :::virgo
Height? :::5'6"
[x] Part 2 -- Describe... [x]
Your heritage/nationality :::French, Polsih and something else...
Your hair :::dyed, shoulder length, fluffy
Your fears :::I'm panophobic
Your perfect room :::The basement with Kingdom Hearts Characters painted on the walls
What you practically do in a day :::sleep, homework, school, read.
[x] Part 3 -- What is/are... [x]
Words you overuse :::"Bitch" "Whore" "Cunt" "Lesbien" "Spiffy"
Phrases you overuse :::"I'm gonna shoot you in the butt" "On my propertayah?"
Your first thought when you wake up :::SNOW DAY?? Damn
Your greatest accomplishment :::An A on every paper in my college prep English class
Something you want to do :::boogie down
[x] Part 4 -- This or that [x]
Pepsi or Coke :::Coke
McDonald's or Burger Kings :::McDonald's
Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera :::Chritina Aguilera
Chocolate or vanilla :::Vanilla
Adidas or Nike :::I believe that no one should pay more than 30$ for shoes...
Black or white :::Black
Bills or Coins ((Think $$$)) :::about 5"6'
Burgers or hot dogs :::burgers
Egypt or France :::France (Ne mettez pas ton chat dans le micro-ondes)
Rock or rap :::Rock
[x] Part 5 -- Do you...[x]
Smoke :::No
Cuss :::Every damn day
Sing well :::Depends
Sing in the shower :::yes I do
Talk to yourself --a lot-- :::Yeah, but that isnt that odd, its when I answer myself r expect and answer that I wory.
Believe in yourself :::Yeah I do
Like taking these longass surveys? :::Yeah I DOOOOOOO
Play an instrument :::No I dont
Want to go to college? :::Yes I do
Want to get married? :::Yes
Want to have children? :::Yes
Think you're a health freak? :::No
Get along with your parents :::Kinda
Get along with your siblings? :::Kinda
Think you're popular :::OH YES! I AM THE MOST POPULARIST!
[x] Part 6 -- In the past month have you..[x]
Gone out of state :::No
Drank alchohal :::No
Smoke :::No
Get high :::No
Done any drugs :::No
Eaten an entire box of oreos :::No
Been on stage :::No
Gone skinny dipping :::No
Been dumped :::No
Dyed your hair :::No -but I will when my Mommy gets the freakin stuff-
Stolen anything :::No hey they're all no!
[x] Part 7 -- Your friends! =D [x]
Craziest :::Kelly
Loudest :::Brandi
Most shy :::Amanda
Blondest :::Me
Smartest :::Amanda
Kindest :::All of them, cept Brandi. She throws pudding
Best personality :::all of them
Most talented :::Kelly
Best singer :::Brandi
Most ghetto :::Sara!
Drama Queen ((or King XP)) :::Amanda
Pain in the ass :::All of 'em thats why I love them
The one you just want to strangle to death ((Homer Simpson style)):::Sara!
Funniest :::Kelly and Brandi
Best person for advice :::all
Dependable :::all
Trustworthy :::all
Druggie :::Shayna is the only one I know of thats ever done anything bad like that...
Most likely to end up in jail :::Me.... domestic disturbance
Person you've known the longest :::Brandi
[x] Part 8 -- The Last... [x]
Last dream :::My brother threatened to blow up the Senior room at my high school
Last nightmare :::I was raped by my ex
Car ride :::Berta's car going home from skool
Last time you cried :::I was laughing so hard last night I cried.
Last movie seen :::Elf
Last movie rented :::I CANT REMEMBER!
Last book read :::White Oleander
Last word said :::Zut
Last curse word said :::Zut
Last time you laugh :::five minutes ago
Last phone call :::Gramma, shut up, I have a life.
Last CD played :::t.A.T.u.
Last song you listened to :::Show Me Love
Last annoyance :::God damn dog barking at nothing
Last IM :::Brandi
Last weird encounter :::Brandi
Last person you hugged :::Kelly
Last person you yelled at :::John
Last time you wore a skirt :::November 22, 2003
Last time you've been evil :::when I was five
Sarcastic? :::last time I spoke to someone
Last time you fought with your parents :::a couple of weeks ago
Last time you wished upon a star :::when I was eight
Played Truth or Dare :::when I stayed the night at Shayna's house for her birthday. I dont want to talk about it.
Spent quality time alone :::every god damn day
[x] Part 9 -- I swear this is the last one! -- Randomness [x]
Are you talking to someone on AIM :::No, but I am logged on
Do you feel lonely :::No
Ever TP'd someone's house :::No...
How about egging someone's house :::no...
Do you not like dislike not like me? :::Whaa?
Ain't Eminem and 50 Cent just fine? :::No. 50 Cent is cool but Eminem... no.
Yo Momma :::Yes? What about her?
Ever been so hungry you felt like you could eat the person next to you? :::no
What do you think of George Bush? :::his huge bush will absorb us when we die.
Any secret fetishes? :::Staples
Do you like to wear chains? O_o :::No
How many languages do you speak? :::two
Damn.. are your fingers tired? Cause mine sure are! :::No, theyre just cold
Glad this is over? ((Say yes and I'll stalk you XP)) :::I already have a stalker little dude

Bored? ((Over 100 questions)) brought to you by BZOINK!

I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2004 13 January :: 8.49pm
:: Mood: chipper
:: Music: NUFFING

Poor elf deformity due to recent kiddnapping and being exposed to spoons for too long.
OUR PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU ELROND!!!!!

Dont worry, no one will notice the arms there if you wear pants.


~Becca~

I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2004 3 January :: 11.56pm
:: Mood: dont care
:: Music: dont care

dont care
Joyeux Noël people.


So Christmas was fun this year! No. I got a lot of art supplies for some reason... but yeah. Art supplies and whore cloths that I will wear.

Over this Christmas break I realizes one thing. Christmas Eve is the only day I will get drunk on. I know I annoyed people witht the whole "I'm never going to drink" crusade, but I will get drunk on Christmas Eve and Day just to drown out the holiday spirit. I hate this time of year with a passion. I dont know why, maybe it's because I'm part Grinch or something, but I really really really hate Christmas.

And get this as well, I got the t.A.T.u cd and the Christina Aguilara cd... Do you know that this means? My parents, well I mean my mother, actually noticed the things I was listening to! *The Christina Aguilara thing is a long story, normally I dont listen to her but I really like her song "I'm OK"* Yeah, and I got an easel. Meaning Mom remembered what I told her! -has heart attack and eats s'more cheeze-its-

Well I have to go then. Moo. and remember. Squishy is mine.

I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2003 14 December :: 6.29pm
:: Mood: enraged

Abortions
Okay, my internet is stupid. You'll click on a link and it'll shoot you ahead like three sites up and it'll be all porn... but this time it shot me up to an anti-abortion web site. that had the nastiest picture on the front page... have a look for yourself http://www.abortionismurder.org/

I want to throw up. That is one image that I will not be able to get out of my head for... well... ever. Then they had a diagram of the abortion proceedure... and that made me cry. Its gross. Check it out.

I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2003 13 December :: 1.55pm
:: Mood: cranky

Far Behind

Now maybe
I didn't mean to treat you bad
But I did it anyway
And now maybe
Some would say your life was sad
But you lived it anyway
And so maybe
Your friends they stand around they watch your crumble
As you falter to the ground
And then someday
Your friends they stand beside as you were flying
Oh you were flying oh so high
But them someday people look at you for what they call their own
They watch you suffer
Yeah they hear you calling home
But then some day we could take our time
To brush the leaves aside so you can reach us
But you left me far behind

Now maybe
I didn't mean to treat you oh so bad
But I did it anyway
Now maybe some would say you're left with what you had
But you couldn't share the pain

No, no, no
Couldn't share the pain, they watch you suffer
Now maybe I could have made my own mistakes
But I live with what I've known
And then maybe we might share in something great
But won't you look at where we've grown
Won't you look at where we've gone
But then someday comes tomorrow holds a sense of what I feel for you in my mind
As you trip the final line
And that cold day when you lost control
Shame you left my life so soon you should have told me
But you left me far behind

Now maybe I didn't mean to treat you oh so bad
But I did it anyway
Now maybe some would say you're left with what you had
But you couldn't share the pain No, no, no

Now maybe I didn't mean to treat you oh so bad
But I did it anyway
Now maybe some would say you're left with what you had
But you couldn't share the pain
I said times have changed your friends
They come and watch you crumble to the ground
They watch you suffer
Yeah, they hold you down
Hold you down
Now maybe brother, maybe love
I didn't mean to treat you bad
But you left me far behind
Left me far behind
Left me far behind


This song reminds me of my ex... hee

I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2003 11 December :: 11.54am
:: Mood: crushed
:: Music: ...

grr
You know what really gets me? That it's bee to years almost since Patience left them guys, and you keep dragging her back. I get you they feel, I really do because she hurt me too, but it doesnt hurt anymore. She is gone to me and I cant cry for her anymore. Fuck her and her lies and the fact that she cant talk to the people that she claimed to love because it makes her "remember" and I'm not even going to get into that. They know where I stand when it comes to her so please just knock it off.

Talk about her all you want, but if I ever hear her name directed towards me again without my permission bad things will happe. Not the the bitch who couldnt stop talking, but to me. I cant hear her name again. I let her hurt me. I let her hurt all of you. Its my fault. So please, please DONT talk about her with me. I dont need to blame myself again...

1 I can't keep going under | I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2003 7 December :: 7.05pm
:: Mood: blank
:: Music: ...

Today just isnt my day
Really..... okay, here goes...

Today I was decorating the christmas tree alone because no one wanted to help me... so anyway, I was moving it back so I could get the the other side, when it fell on me. Picture this: A Christmas tree on its side with two arms and two legs sticking out on the sides. I was there forever because no one was home to help me... I wish I would have gotten a picture... ;_;........ yeah but anyway... that isnt all that happened... I was sitting on the couch eating soup fer dinner... and Buddy, my brothers little min. pin. who likes to be very warm so he lays under pillows and junk, was trying to get under the pillow that was supporting my bowl on my lap... well he... dug himself under it really quickly, throwing the bowl onto my lap. It burned soo bad.... I was screaming "Oh my god! Hot! Hot! It's really realy hot!" and my parents came running down the stairs completely freaking out because they thought I was on fire.. it was funy... I hope they dont start calling me "Soupcrotch" like John did... Yeah... but today just hasnt been my day, not at all.... not to mention I'm going back to school for the first time in four days so I'm gonna have a lot of homework... AND! Charmed isnt on tonight... today sucked.... but on a lighter note I smell like strawberries and cream and mom dyed my hair so it isnt screwed up becaue I didnt do it so thats good^_^
Kay, well I'm goin to bed now, write later I will...

Peace,
~*Becca*~

I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2003 6 December :: 10.18pm
:: Mood: chipper
:: Music: ...

Cheetos
I can finally update for real now, Mom and Dad finally went to go and get a new keyboard... YAY! so yeah anyway, not that much to update on, other then Wendy and I put up the Christmas tree and came to the conclusion that it always leaned in.... but yeah anyway, its gonna take some time to get used to this keyboard because some of the keys arent where they used to be, its a really good thing that I like to look at the keyboard when typing sometimes... but anyway... BOOYA! I HAVE A NEW KEYBOARD!!! I'm in a good mood, sorry...... OOOOO and and we're getting Norton Anti-Virus so there wont be any viruses... because theyre getting so very annoying.... but yeah, I want to type a lot so this entry will be full of complete ramblings among other things because no one is on my aim or yahoo at the moment and I have no idea on how to work ICQ... but yeah I think that I might even actually update like all of my journals and ever work on my website for a change, well its been fun because now I can type really really fast, I'm gettin good... but I have to go because the internet is fucking up again, see you later as I will be updating a lot more often now... Happy Christmas!!!

Much love and a lot of head splodyness,
~*~Becca~*~

I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2003 4 December :: 2.58pm
:: Mood: cold
:: Music: ...

Chee7os
I w/\n7 some chee7os...

I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2003 18 November :: 5.52pm
:: Music: ...

yeah
HASH(0x877bf2c)
Your soul is bound to the Rose Petals: The
Wronged.

"'ve come undone and all hopes of mending
me are gone because the pain took my soul.
Can't you see? The only one who can put me
back together again is me."


The Rose Petals are associated with sorrow,
reflection, and wisdom. They are governed by
the goddess Persephone and their sign is The
Teardrop, or Broken Love.

As a Rose Petal, you are always self-reflective and
may be hard on yourself. You probably have
been hurt in the past by other people and can
sometimes distance yourself, as a result. You
don't usually let other get too close to you,
but you are very good at mending your spirits
back together by yourself.


What Rose Is Your Soul Bound To?
brought to you by Quizilla

I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2003 15 November :: 5.56pm

I'mmmmmmmmmmmm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaccccccccccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk! I went to a play yesterday, David and Lisa, the only reason I went was because my friend Amnda wasin it, she was great... yeah bored. I was only gone for like... three days but if felt like forty thousand and a half years

2 I can't keep going under | I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2003 11 November :: 5.13pm
:: Music: ...

funny
Love in High School is like an Iraguian as president... it just aint gonna happen.

I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2003 9 November :: 1.04pm

wow I havent updated in a while... I had kind of an inspiration so I wanted to write a new story and what not.. I cant decide weather or not to make it a long or a short story.. I like this one a lot more the the long story I wrote.. so I might just combine the both of them.. ya know same character, different past same future kind thing... or I might make it a short story so I can take it to my Creative Writing Club and read it there... I might be quiting creative writing though, I have a lot of reasons to... I just dont want to go anymore, I dont like being there, maybe I'll join back next year when Angela is gone, she gives me weird vibes that I dont like very much. I like French club though, my sister is the president so she forces me to be there every week... dunno why...

okay, I think that post kind of makes up for me neglecting my.. updating.. duties.

shoot me I sick

KELLEH HAS PINK EYE!!! Poor poor Kelleh ;_;

I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2003 5 November :: 1.27pm
:: Mood: Icky
:: Music: none

none
I tired and sick. Sasha wont stop being loud. I got a headache and I stayed home from skool today. Munkey. Duude. MoOoOoOoOoOoOoO?

2 I can't keep going under | I've got to breathe


VampiressHollyMarie

:: 2003 29 October :: 9.31pm
:: Mood: cold
:: Music: Are You Happy Now?

Dream of the Ocean


I want to draw the ocean
I want to feel the breeze and smell the salt
I want to see you swimming with the fish
I want to you to be taken away
By the strong current
I want to hear you calling my name
Begging for forgiveness and my help
I want to have one last glimpse of your face
Before you go under
I want to hear you call for help
For anyone
Hearing my name amongst your struggling
Over and over again
You want, nay you need my help
I can't hear you anymore
Your voice is lost to my ears
I want to draw you dying in the ocean
I want to draw the murderous ocean waves
That cover you like a freezing blanket
I want to see your cold bloated body
Drifting to shore
My name still on your blue lips
I want to stand apart while they investigate your death
I want them to ask me how you died
I want them to know that you were stupid
And went to far across the line
I want to see you in the coroner’s office
I want to be the one who identifies your disgusting body
I want to see you one last time
Then I want to let you go
I want to draw the ocean
I want to feel the breeze and smell the salt
Before I go insane

2 I can't keep going under | I've got to breathe

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