amajules
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2003 19 December :: 10.29am
~~~~*** MERRY CHRISTMAS***~~~~
love you,
~*Amanda*~
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amajules
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2003 12 December :: 10.28am
:: Mood: hopeful
:: Music: Jingle Bell Rock...oh i love how chorus rubs onto me.
~~~*oh hunny! i love that picture!!!! i almost cried! lol. okay i love the idea about the presenting me. I'm used to being shown off....lol, and though that's mostly done by guys, i guess i could get used to a girl doing it too! lol, but there's good news and bad news, the good news go ahead and do it, the bad, our computer compltetly and totally, was utterly destroyed by a crash. so my dad's been spending 4-5 hours a day, retrieving everything that got lost, which is soooooo sooooo sooooooooooo much! anyways, anything i have to do, like check e-mail and stuff i do at Josh's house, and i haven'y been over there yet, so, yeah.
anyways, things are startting to feel more right w/ Randy and i, some of the
weird-i-ness has gone, he's been taking all his finals this past week, so that's relieving some stress.....hold on,
hows it going? this is Bo. i'm sitting by Amanda right now. bye
i have weird friends cfbvfvf (<- ha ha Bo)
anyways, how's our sister (Renee) been? i haven't heard from her in awhile
oh my god!!! i might go to Disney World for 100 bucks! okay i'll explain..lol
i might go to Disney b/c the Youth Chorale chorus (seperate from regular chorus) is going there to sing for the Christmas show, so, there was a meeting that was required this past Tuesday (which also happened to be the day of auditions for the musical) and this grl Tababtha didn't go. and there's a required meeting this Sunday, and she's not going to that. so McBroom said if she doesn't show Sun. i have 1 week to pay $100 and to learn the music so....excited! plaus i only pay $100 while everyone else paid like $350-$400, b/c if Tabatha can't go, then she only gets $100 back, but the rrom she'll be sharing, and space on the bus are already paid for and can't be taken back. i get major discount!!!!lol
anyways, yeah auditiotns for Joseph and The Amazing Technicolor Coat were Tuesday and the list is supposed to go up today after school, sooooo i'm excited, but nervous. the only major grl part is the narrator, andCanady, said he might divide it from 4 people or maybe just have one grl do it all, but i don't think he'll have 1 do it, he's got 3 talented grls that are capable of it. Me, LiLa Breese, and Rachael Swindler. if he makes it 2 though, i hope it's Lila and I.
anyways, lemme get rollin'
i love you, and i miss you too
pray for the list! lol*~~~
~*Amanda*~
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amajules
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2003 11 December :: 6.11pm
dar n, the icon is a little distorted...^^^^
phew, goodness, is it Thursday night already? where the heck have the days gone? i swear, yesterday was saturday. eh, but anyway i'm sorry as usual for taking so long to respond, you know how it goes
goodness don't you hate when you spend time typing things only for them to disappear?
i'm glad you two had a movie-like ending to your conversation ~wink wink~ and hey - if you two can get through all of your struggles, than it's just more proof that you love eachother :)
but hey guess what - for spanish class all of us have to make presentations (in spanish of course) and the theme is ~diversiones~ .. so it can be people, places, things in general .. hehe guess what? i'm presenting YOU!! lol. what was your reaction to that? so guess what that means? you have to send me pictures of you! (Over email) (if there's any of just me and you also, that'd be great!) of course, i'm showing off some of our crazy ones... because, i've been trying to think of what to present.. and i've had this overwhelming feeling that people are going to expect me to be presenting something either about music and pure life, or swimming, because that's almost what i've always done... and blah, it's gotten boring - so i get to talk about my best friend in south carolina. :) therefore, i can EASILY make my speech last for 5 minutes (requirement).
but um... if you mind me showing you off, then i won't of course.
what else.. last night was my winter concert, and the chorus of course did amazing - you know the song joyful joyful from sister act two? and how in the very beginning it has the soloist and in the background has the girl doing sign language? ahem, well i did the sign language!! got tons of compliments for that :)
and well, everything else has been pretty uneventful.
you know what though Amanda? i've been swearing a lot. not when people are around because their reaction to me swearing really annoys me - - but all silliness aside - when i'm by myself sometimes they naturally come out of my mouth without any reservations! ...........haha, i must be the only person in the world that this is a big deal for...
but i'm done now, because i have a research paper due tomorrow and i'm only on the first page of it!
so hey, i think we're due for another phone chat :)
i love you
and still miss you like always
Julie
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amajules
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2003 8 December :: 10.51am
:: Mood: hopeful
~*As you said, saturday has come and gone, and was very painful in the beginning, but after the movie, and a big fight that lead into a deep discussion for an hour and a half in the parking lot. which ended w/ us kissing, and some more, (don't have a heart attack lol) was very good, as to why in the world this is so short and so breif? i typed it ALLLLL out for a half hour, and then i went to "x" out of another screen, and i hit the wrong "x" ....don't laugh, it's not funny. lol
anyways, we still love each other, always will, and for right now, we're gunna stick it out, and stay together and see what we can accomplish, Julie, i just love him so much, and i don't ever want to lose him. he is the love of my life, and he would never hurt me, or not tell me something, and a lot of stuff, although my true feelings at the moment, i knew better than to say. i know he would never hurt me, and that he tries just as hard as i do to treat me right. i love him, i adore him, and i will always love him. Julie, even if we don't get married for the next 5 years. i will still remain by his side. and ever hopeful, that we are meant to be. i love him so much, he's my God-send, and i'm gunna be faithful w/ the things God gives to me.
i'm gunna go, and i miss you too, i need you hear to share these tears and smiles w/ . lol
i love you,
~*Amanda*~
P.S.> God is faithful to give you your hearts desires.
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amajules
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2003 8 December :: 10.09am
Amanda,
I'm really sorry it's taken me three days to respond - - and I'm going to have to make this short for now but I'll write more to you during my lunch today (I have like 5 minutes left of this period..) ….
I pray that things have gotten better. Whether or not they did get better, I still wish that I was there to just give you a hug and let you talk. Don't ever apologize for talking to me about things that are so important to you. How did your Saturday turn out, now that it has passed?
…Amanda, you DO have something to give, other than your voice.
As beautiful as it is sweets, the quality of your voice does not define you. Your name, who you are - means worthy of love. Go ahead, look it up. And that you are. Listen, there's the bell,
I'll write more to you later!
I love you, wish i was here for you. xoxoxo
Jules
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amajules
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2003 5 December :: 10.32am
:: Mood: aggravated
once again my man
~~~Julie i'm sorry these past two letters having been nothing but complaining, but there's no one here to talk to. i can't even really talk to Randy w/o him getting annoyed, i wish i could. This Sat. is our ten month anniversary, i should be so happy, but i'm not, i don't know why we're the way we are w/ each other right now, but i hate it, everytime i talk to him i feel like he's annoyed, or i did something and he's not telling me, i feel like he likes somebody else almost. and everytime i try to talk to him about something, like a few nights ago, about how we're too serious, and how we both feel we need a break, but yet don't want to break up. well at the end of the conversation, i said maybe now that we both realize this problem we can address it still in the relationship, and not have to break up and he said "yeah" then i said well i do this to try to make this better, and instead of him saying, "well, i'll do this" he just said "okay" like i'm the only person in this relationship, who A) has problems, and B) really cares about us breaking up or not. Julie i feel like he doesn't appreciate me anymore, i do so much for him too, for x-mas i got him this poster (a small one, not the huge ones) of a tiger swimming in a lake, and you have to paint it in w/ these acrylic paints, Jules i've been slaving over this thing since last month, and it's not done yet. Also, b/c i don't have much money, i'm writing him something really special, about what he means to me, and how i'm truly so thankful for him, and also b/c he likes Teenage Ninja Mutant Turtles, i'm getting him his favorite one, and some other odds and ends, and well, he told me he's getting me this Spongebob Shower Radio (which i want soooooo bad) and then instead of something personal and special, he was also gunna get me Spongebob's first season on DVD. Now, i love the effort that he's showing, but he knows i'm not a material girl, if anything all i want from him, is a rose, and something he made, he did. i'm about to cry, i just don't want to hurt him by telling him all of this, i feel so under-appreciated by him. and all this past week he just sounds like he doesn't even want to talk to me, or have anything to do w/ me. and i do know he loves me and appreciates me, but i feel like there's something happening something going on either good or bad, and he's keeping it from me. That's the majority of my feeling's right now, i don't understand anything that's going on, i feel like he's not telling me anything. i don't know what to do Julie, i've been praying SO very hard this past week, and all i keep hearing is:
break up and let him see what he's missing, let him re-discover how much he really loves you, how much he cares for you, how much he needs you there. but i know that's jut me talking and not God, and also, i'm afraid, b/c what if really doesn't need me anymore. (God i'm like bawling in the middle of this class) what if we break up and that's it.
i'm scared Julie, and the one person i go to when i cry is the person who's making me cry. Who do i go to now? I swear, i am so dependant on his love for me, that i go crazy when i don't feel it. Maybe i'm not as ready for this serious of a relationship as i thought, maybe Gods not done healing me w/ all my past hurt, and that's why i get like this, maybe, i don't know, i just want Him to hold me, and say i love you, not Randy, God, i miss being 7 and dancing in front of the church, i miss my innocence, i wish i had peace w/ myself so i could have peace w/ Randy. i wish Randy knew everything so he could understand, instead of saying things that really hurt, and he doesn't even know it.
i just wish i had a second chance at life, and still knew the outcomes, i would of stayed away from David, stayed away from Brett, from Giovana, i would of stayed away from Chuck, i waited and held off everything so i could give it all to Randy. i feel like i have nothing to give him. nothing. and then when this stuff i feel like he knows it, and he realizes it, and he knows he deserves someone who can give everything to him. i hate being the person that i am, i hate having nothing to offer anybody except a good voice, i hate that i still hurt. i hate that i hate. i need to go, i need to stop crying, i'll talk to you later Jules, i love you so much, thanx (once again) for listening
~*Amanda*~
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amajules
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2003 4 December :: 9.43am
hmm.. randy reads this.. does that mean i have to censor what i say?? ;) jk. hi randy.
while reading the whole thing about Randy and band, all i could say was, "yay for Amanda"
hold on - not because you don't like it. i said yay because you're letting him do it, and not asking him to cut back
and before(while reading it) i had gotten to the point you made about your drama, i had thought about already telling you that anyway
but you already realized it, so, good for you... and i have some other "love advice" that crossed my mind..but you probly already
know all of it, plus, how could i know more than you? hehe.
anyway, i have plenty to tell you, but don't have any time! i'll try to find some time later...
i love you dearest, and miss you
Love always,
Jules
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amajules
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2003 4 December :: 9.40am
whoa.. this is crazy, it's true! you're pic tho, is absolutely gorgeous i love it. :)
You're Most Like The Season Autumn ...
You're warm, and the most approachable. You have
that gentle prescence about you. People can
relate to you, and find you easy company.
However it's likely you've been hurt in the
past and it has left you scarred so things can
become rather chilly with you at times. Being
the third Season in, you're mature, trustworthy
and loyal to your friends but prone to
depression and negative thinking.
Well done... You're the shy and sensitive season :)
?? Which Season Are You ??
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amajules
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2003 3 December :: 11.26am
You're Most Like The Season Winter ...
You're often depicted as the cold, distant season.
But you're incredibly intelligent, mature and
Independant. You have an air of power around
you - and that can sometimes scare people off.
You're complex, and get hurt easily - so you
rarely let people in if you can help it. You
can be somewhat of a loner, but just as easily
you could be the leader of many. You Tend to be
negative, and hard to relate to, but you give
off a relaxed image despite being insecure -
and secretly many people long to be like you,
not knowing how deep the Winter season really
is.
Well done... You're the most inspirational of
seasons :)
?? Which Season Are You ??
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amajules
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2003 3 December :: 10.23am
:: Mood: blah
Randy/band (band is a.k.a. "The Devil" right now, not all the time, just right now)
okay so we had to sing yesterday for the JROTC and this kid (whose name shall remain anonymous for sake of Randy reading this...hi hun!) was like staring at me the wole time, we only sang two songs and the pledge to the flag, and i could deal w/ that b/c i'm watching McBroom not anyone else...but then we had to sit on the risers, and watch the rest of the 45 min. ceremony...so gues how long "he" got to look at me? i mean i didn't really mind it cuz it wasn't like rude staring, b/c he's a sergeant (don't worry he's not old, he still in high school) so he had to stay focused on his general and drill team and all, but it was the profilific viewing of me that was annoying me....anways
this Saturday i am celebrating my 10 month anniversary with the love of my life! and now that our anniversary finally falls on a sat when we can actually see each other and be together, he has his first pep band show Sat. evening at the boys basketball game at Coastal (Carolina University) i mean i try not to complain b/c i love him and i really am happy for him and proud of him, i know he loves band and what he does and all, but sometimes i just think there's too much "band" i don't know, i just don't want to make issues out of it or make him feel bad for doing the thing he loves, b/c when i have my plays and such, and i'm barely seeing/ talking to him for 3-4 months straight, he never complains, and i appreciate that, so i try to do the same to him, and swallow down all my girl-feelings. do you even understand this? ~*deepbreath*~ And on top of that he's leaving to do a concert thing w/ one of his bands in N.C tomorrow morning (5 am) so God knows how much i'll talk to him tonight...him having to sleep...or tomorrow night....him getting back and being tired, plus yesterday he came to the school to teach his pep band here @ CF and i couldn't hug him or kiss him, i didn't know how to talk to him normally...i just think that if he has to come to the school to teach, then he shouldn't tell me he's here, b/c i just wanted one kiss and one hug and b/c of his position in the school at that moment, i couldn't. Later that evening he had a concert, and then went to waffle house, and called me @ 10:30 to tell me that's what he was doing, so i called him back at 11 asking when he'd get home, and i stayed up till 12:15am b/c i wanted to talk to him. which i'm thankful for the 45 mins he did manage to stay awake and talk to me. lol but do see what i mean when i say? too much band
so what's new w/ you?
lol....sorry this is sounding so bitchy.
anyways, i do understand it all, i just don't like it. i mean would you like ANYTHING that cuts your 10 month anniversary date in half? i thought so, but what can i do, he loves it, and i'm not gunna even think about telling him to give it up, or even some of it.
anywho...lemme get rollin' love you babe, thatnx for listening w/b soon.
~*Amanda*~
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amajules
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2003 1 December :: 10.29am
:: Mood: Here's my character
ok, for this...i have no comment
What Finding Nemo Character are You?
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amajules
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2003 30 November :: 8.20pm
This is the one i DIDN'T want to get! <3, Julie
What Finding Nemo Character are You?
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amajules
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2003 26 November :: 8.56am
search engine? yeah sure
hey sweetie, i'm sorry 'bout how that present thing turned out and the banquet.
but on the upper hand i'm glad you finally got some much needed R&R. i ungratefully got my period yesterday bad cramps and all. so talk about your fun....hey i'll write more later g2g do literature, hey i'm back....my middle finger on my right hand is hurting, not the knucle, that joint above it right below your finger nail, that one....i crack my knuckles too much, anways, Randy's picking me up today after school which today is a half day, so after this block, i have 10 mins. of third block and then i go home for the rest of the week! Let's see, watch Nemo yet? lol...no seriously have you? oh...i don't know if you guys have seen the previews yet but there's this movie coming out Thanksgiving Day called The Haunted Mansion, w/ Eddie Murphy, it's based on the ride The Haunted Mansion at Disney World, well Randy, me, my mom and dad, Josh and Sara and the boys (Zach and Nick) are gunna go see it Friday! fun! OH MY GOD!!!! A POP-UP ADVERTISEMENT FOR THE HASUNTED MANSION JUST POPPED UP!!!!!! lol lol lol
anyways, i'm gunna go babe! Tell your family i said Happy Turkey Day! luv you guys
love you!,
~*Amanda*~
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amajules
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2003 21 November :: 10.46am
:: Mood: annoyed
okay i can't type long but i need to say that that grl Michelle needs to shut her little snotty mouth up. She acted more like a big biotch than Clifford the dog could of acted like. Don't worry about her, she's just jealous b/c you're the smart, and thoughtful one! but yeah you definitly sound like you need a retreat! well get some rest this weekened, bum out! watch T.V in your pajamas, w/ no makeup on and your hair a mess! rest up babe...it sounds like your next week will be just as trying! i love you and i thinking of you and i promise to write you a proper letter back sometime next week!
i luv ya
~*Amanda*~
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amajules
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2003 21 November :: 12.20am
One of those late nights
wow, that's quite a lot of fruit to sell. Must be a southern thing. ;)
anyway, i'm sitting here in my basement, typing on my dad's laptop, trying to find a radio station that plays classical music, and so far i've been totally unsuccessful...
ah but anyways, i am 3/4 of the way done with a HUGE english outline that is due tomorrow. my brain is fried. I've waited until the last minute to work on this (2 days ago) figuring it wouldn't take this long. as usual, i was wrong and here i am, on the 12th page of my 13 page outline. AH!
thank God the week is almost over.
you know, i'm thinking about how i'm going to be waking up tomorrow and i realized that there is ONE reason why i don't like this haircut: i can't just wake up, throw it in a ponytail, and head to school. it's too crazy for me to just let it be - i HAVE to spend time to style it whether i feel like it or not. otherwise i look like a crazy dude (or maybe a dudette) from the 80's. how fun!
hmm... i'm in one of those moods where i'm totally exhausted yet i totally don't want to go to sleep. like if i could talk to someone, i would talk to them for hours. there's something about midnight conversations that are just totally different from normal ones. like the ones you and randy have all the time. hm.
what else is on my mind. this weekend. and how i should just cancel all of my stupid petty plans and do something meaningful.
right now i'm annoyed at how shallow people can be. i guess part of the reason why i'm thinking about that is because for swimming, it's a tradition to have a team banquet, and at this team banquet the team gives each of the coaches a gift... being that this year has been the best ever, with new coaches and all - i figured we should give them something original and meaningful.. so i came up with this idea for the whole team to do, and so this week i've been asking everyone to hand in their part of it. i talked to one of the main girls, michelle on the team yesterday morning,and she said she would do it and pass along the message to the other team mates so that we can get this done, blah blah. come to find out later, while talking to one of the other girls on the team- that michelle had told her NOT to do it, and that i was the ONLY one who was going to do it. JERK! i was so mad, because everyone had been enthusiastic about my idea, and when i go to follow through with it, everyone is going along with it, and then michelle goes behind my back and tells everyone not to do it. UGGGHH! i was pissed. so anyway what i decided to do, was act like i don't know about what she did, but meanwhile i'm making sure everyone BUT her hands their things in - this way for the final product, she'll be the only one who didn't contribute. HA!
i've been trying my best to not be mad and all.. but goodness this just added to some other things that happened...
don't get me wrong, i'm still very content with my life right now - last night i was writing in my journal and thinking about all of my blessings - true friends and family that God has placed in my life. How can i be so selfish as to not be thankful? ... I mean, yea, John Mazza moved his seat away from mine because i couldn't carry on a conversation with him, and if i think about it, it may bug me.. yet it's not that big a deal for me so i haven't really let myself think about it, because it's just not worth it. moving on. i mean, as a result of him moving his seat, i moved mine next to this girl lindsey's and oh my goodness, the laughs i have during that period now! hehe...
so i've been working on my conditional happiness. yes, it's okay to be upset/unhappy... but not basing my happiness on my circumstances has been majorly on my mind this week.
i think i need a weekend at Elaine's. You know? just the idea of getting away from people at school (although i love them dearly) would be something i'd like right about now...rejuvenate! :)
or how about a weekend in south carolina?
now i'm REALLY dreaming!
aah, you know what, i'm going to get myself a pilot's license (i AM old enough...) and then i'm going to buy myself a very small plane... this way, whenever i want to spend a weekend visiting you, i can just go!
haha, notice what this late night atmosphere is doing to my imagination? i better go and finish up my work.
I'll talk to you soon my love, and have fun this weekend!!!!! :)
~MWAH~
love Jules
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amajules
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2003 19 November :: 10.41am
hey hey hey
~~~well this weekend seems to be full.....FULL OF FUN!!!!! lol let's see this Thursday i get to go to the Wheelwright auditorium to watch Randy play in his band concert finale! Then on Friday he's briging me home and we're going to watch the Disney animated Peter Pan, then that evening we're coming back to the school to watch the Middle School production of Peter Pan!! fun then Saturday we're going to go see Elf...(he doesn't know that yet) lol abd then Youth Group and then Sunday is church then he's got work.
on thee un-fun side i have a 6 pg paper due on Fri. about the play CATS and it's conection w/ T.S. Eliot and his book Old Possums Book of Practical Cats. The play was written based on the poems in that book.
well anyways all i have is 3 pgs. HA!!! lol
it's windy over here....but my baby's jacket's keeping me warm!
hey sorry but this has to be like MAD short i gotta go get pple to buy fruit! hahahaha
It's one of the chorus fund raisers. and our sale quota is $300.00!!!! so far i've sold $150.00 so...anyways. lemme go babe! i love ya!
~*Amanda*~
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amajules
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2003 17 November :: 11.41am
:: Mood: smiley
loved your reaction to my hair hehe. and sorry for the many ppppppps's :)
Hey there Amanda
i sooo wish you could see my hair tooo - as soon as i get my digital camera fixed
(yea, i broke it, AH) i will be sending you a picture...
sounds like an awesome day with your Randy was planned - i still can't wait to meet
him, sigh..
hmm so i am trying to think of new things to tell you and can't think of ANY!!
so sad
i tried calling you on Friday night, got that fax machine thing again, and then i left
a message on your cell phone, i'm not sure if you got it
we'll have to keep trying!
and alritey, i guess i should go eat some lunch now, my stomach is disrupting the
library lol.
i'll talk to you soon love, sorry to make this so short!
MWAH!
Jules
P.S. - i have definitely noticed the happiness/sadness times have coincided. i think
it's pretty cool
p.p.s. - - the sunflower seeds - definitely ring a bell, but not clearly enough to fully remember
ppps - remember the pink and purple flower rings we got when we were out with
the girls for sara's (NO H! hehe) bachelorette party? i wore it this weekend :) got many
many compliments...
pppps. - glad to hear about the teacher. :)
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amajules
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2003 14 November :: 10.21am
:: Mood: surprised
OMG!!!!!!
OMG OMG OMG!!!!!! I'M SOOOO EXCITED!!!!! I WANNA SEE I WANNA SEE I WANNA SEE!!!!!!! OMG Julie i wanna be w/ you so badly!!!! i miss you soo much. and yes baby you deserve that compliment more than any other grl i know! so what'd ya do w/ the hair? i'm so happy! My Julie-grl is steppin' out of her comfort zone and i'm not there!!!!!
omg i'm just so ecstatic! lol 'bout the kiss on the cheek to my teach...#1 he's a nice guy..not nasty, and #2, he's what we would say..on the OTHER ;) side of the fence. get my drift?! anyways....i wish you went shopping w/ me too! also, i'm extremely hyper today b/c my baby-boy is coming to my 3rd block chorus class, and is spending lunch w/ me (just b/c) and is taking me home and spending the evening w/ me! oh happy days are here again! lol and my tantrum wasn't like screaming and kicking, i just dropped to the floor on my hands and knees and wouldn't move! lol
yeah im'ma gunna go over to the chorus room like @ 11:00 but i gotta do some work b/4 i go so let me finish this up babe! i miss you soooo much and i'm sooo happy and excited for you! also i love how we always seem to have our spells of good and bad at the same time..ever notice that!?! lol i love you babe!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
~*Amanda*~
P.S.> Miss Amanda is ALWAYS right lol lol lol j/k
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amajules
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2003 14 November :: 9.44am
:: Music: the tuba (i'm in the band room hehe)
AAAHHH
MY HAIR IS GONE!!!!
AAAAHHH IT'S GONE!!!
LOL. MY HAIR IS SHORT. AND WHEN I SAY SHORT, I MEAN SHORT.
HOW FUN!!!
oh my goodness amanda, last night me and my mom drove an hour north to a hair salon and i told them i wanted something drastic, kind of explained what i wanted - and okay, the lady braided my hair (one big braid) took the scissors, and cut it off by my neck, and handed me the hair!! my mouth was wide open!
and then she continued to style it and cut it even SHORTER. yes, boy short. but CUTE! i wasn't crying when they were done - i was laughing. i find it the funniest thing ever, because even if people think it looks bad, i'm just having fun with it! haha... of course the first thing i thought was how i needed you here so that you could see it and help style it and everything! i had tried to find a friend all week who would've been available to go with me just for ~emotional support~ and none of my friends could make it. sigh. but it was so fun. and the other women there, had been there when they wet my hair and so they saw how long and thick it was. it was a very personal place to be, very comfortable - - but anyway so yea i'm sitting in the chair getting my hair cut and some of the customers actually stayed longer because they couldn't believe it and wanted to see the end product! one of the ladies couldn't get over it, she was like, "see - - - i LOVE this - [turns to her customer] you have to have such high self confidence in order to do what she's doing. i love that, that's awesome." what a compliment! and it's true, because at first i was tentative about the style bc i really feel like a boy from the 80's or something lol.. but either way i was like, "it's a bad hair cut, but i can't stop smiling! it's so fun! i love it." haha, and i'm just laughing about it. the consensus? my girl friends love it... the guys - of course like long hair (although they haven't really said anything to me yet haha.) everyone was shocked. and i know i know, you told me to go through with it! Miss Amanda is right again. :) i love you. :)
okay, ANYWAY enough about my hair. i'm so happy for you amanda! we're both happy! (although i wish i could go shopping with you hehe) and that whole throw yourself on the floor kid tantrum thing? i could totally picture you doing that lol. and hmm... kissing a teacher on the cheek - not sure what to think! i want to see that teacher!
alritey, well as usual, there's so much more to say, and absolutely no more time to say it!
but before i go - thanks for praying for my cousins amanda, it really means so much. and um, we have to make plans. to get together. yes. sounds good.
okay well i will talk to you sooooon and hey - i'll try calling you tonite! i think i'll be around...
okay well good bye my dear.
i love you and can't wait to see you.
mwah
Jules
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amajules
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2003 13 November :: 10.54am
:: Mood: happy
:: Music: Boyz II Men-Your Love
~~~~~~~I'm happy, I'm in love w/ Randy, i get to see and hang w/ him Friday and Saturday.............AND..........I WENT SHOPPING!~~~~~~~
~*~*~*~*~*~*LIFE IS GOOD*~*~*~*~*~
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amajules
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2003 12 November :: 10.21am
:: Mood: x-cited & for the 1st time, happy w/ my life
hey!
~~~yeah hey, remember me?!? lol nice to hear from ya! lol omg first and formost i'm soooooooo happy for you and your luck w/ the solo! Second glad to know Scott's home safe....i've been thinking about both your cousins lately and praying for them...probably the whole Vets program that got me thinking about it. and third....I MISS YOU!!!! lol
anyways yeah the 6 shows were only 5 and as much fun as it was especially w/ Randy there playing in the band and me singin on stage....my body is having other thoughts right now...like, "owwww my back, legs, arms, and neck." lol not to mention my voice is somewhat squeaky and raspy...you know the voice. lol Yeah Mr. McBroom told us he was going to switch the soloists around for sake of our voices getting tired, but i sang the solo 4 times. then @ the end of the day he was like, i didn't hear a thank you for letting me let you sing all the of those solos....and i said sorry i'll kiss the ground you walk on...he goes no....i said i'll kiss the seat of your office chair.....and he goes no but a kiss on my cheek will do....so i looked @ Randy and kissed McBroom and he goes you sounded pretty up there. ! i was so happy, my drama teacher Mr. Canady said i souded pretty up there too! so i told him he looked pretty! lol
yeah Randy got asked to play the tuba for our shows b/c this kid Tyler got expelled along w/ the grl he had "relations" w/ on the back of the bus on the band trip. lol sorry...i think it's funny. there are some stupid people down here.
after the show Randy and i went home and relaxed...him watching "Buffy" his favorite show, and me on the phone w/ Deanna, then when his show was over and i was off the phone we cudled until he had to leave which i takled him b/c i didn't want him to go....Julie, i like pitched a fit. cute fit though. You know how little kids will do something if they don't get what they want? like hold their breath or go limp and through themselves on the floor? well i threw myself on the floor. lol when Randy was little he used to hold his breath. lol anyways
OMG Julie i LOVE him SOOOO much
HE'S THE ONE, HE'S THE ONE, HE'S THE ONE!!!!!!! I'm so excited! i can't wait for you and your family to meet him! i just can't wait to bring him home to you guys. knowing your parents they'll probably grill him while you, me and Renne are upstairs gossiping! lol. isn't that a great mental picture?!
Julie i NEVER thought my life could be so complete, so happy, so full. and now....~*huge wave of Gods peace.*~
anyways...i tried calling you again the next day and nobody picked up. i'm eating sunflower seed and typing and i'm having a memory of them w/ you but, i don't know what that memory is exactly...any clue? lol
anyways babe....let me go on to class i love you sooooo much and i miss you.
best wishes in everything you're doing and accomplishing
babe!
~*Amanda*~
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amajules
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2003 12 November :: 9.58am
forgot to mention these!
the Finding Nemo movie - - definitely HAVEN'T seen it yet!!! as soon as i had seen
the preview, i had wanted to see it. but have i gottena chance to, of course not!
altho my brother and everyone else around me has!
and what else...
my cousin Scott - who was in Iraq - is now home! YAY!
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amajules
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2003 10 November :: 10.14am
:: Mood: content
mwah
i called you last night a bunch of times w/ just a busy signal as my answer.... :( then i got online thinking that's were you'd be. i actually wound up talking to your sister for awhile. that was cool. she said she tried calling you up too and got the same thing...where were you last night huh? lol
i got a Vet's Show tonight @ 7:30 wish you could see it...i have a solo! woohoo! then tomorrow, we have 6 shows for the school to perform throughout the day! Double Woohoo! lol anyways, i'm waiting for your response darling...i miss you and i'm thinkin of you always...i luv you!
~*Amanda*~
P.S.> Have you seen the Finding Nemo movie!
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amajules
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2003 4 November :: 10.35am
~~~hey pook-i-ness! i have to admit you kinda had me scared there while you were talking about all that friend stuff but i got it...is'aight.
halloween was awesome, we didn't have a contest but i was sitting next to Adriane when i read your entry and she said we would of won...we have pics, so i'll try and send you some in a couple of days. there was a little drinking Lauren's (the grl who house the party was @) parents didn't mind tho, they said they would rather us drink and even get drunk in thier house than at some party w/ freaky guys and stuff, i had some spiked punch nothing big, didn't get a buzz just had a glass, Randy...of course didn't drink he was driving...he's sucha good boy! lol
i have to send you prom pics, i could of sworn i sent you some over aim. ah well. later i guess.
ummmm....today Deanna, Lauren, Adriane and myself are going to get our nails did after school for the Veterans day concert on Tues. FUN! i wish you were here.
babe, by the way, just to let you know, i may have friends, close friends, maybe even best friends, but no one is my Julie-grl. People can have more than 1 best friend b/c they relate to different people in more than 1 way. like, how Adriane is my best friend, doesn't compare to how you're my best friend....but you're both still close enough to me to BE my best friend. And yes Julie, i love you very much, and i like you very much lol
personally i think that expression "You can love someone, but you don't have to like them" only fits when relating to blood family. b/c i don't love anybody i don't like. whereas i don't like my parents, but i do love them. Babe MY saying i love you, is just a bigger extensions of "i really like you, i really like hanging out w/ you, talking to you, being stupid w/ you." lol. Now you can question whoever you want on your friendship w/ them ...but Julie DeLuca i'd better NEVER hear or read, for that matter, any thought of doubt about OUR friendship in that curly little head of yours again! lol lol lol
if you start to tho...read this again.! lol
anyways....
do you like what i've done w/ the place?!? lol i didn't like that green looking screen so i changed it Fri. lol
i saw a billboard today driving to school and it had Kermit the Frog on it and it said,
"Eats flies, Dates a pigs
Hollywood star"
Live Your Dreams
isn't that brilliant(<-- my new word which i have vowed to use once a day till it becomes part of my every day dialouge) i thought of you smiling and laughing w/ me if we saw that together! lol
About Sara...no "h" at the end she hates that... she always goes, "my names Sara...not Sara-ah" lol as of Sun she was still throwing up, missed church and all, but i visited her yesterday and she said she was alright. other than that i'll be most definitely praying for Renne. poor thing.
i totally agree w/ the whole, i miss you but it's good we're as apart as we are. and for all the same reasons you think it's good too.
as far as Dan goes....i read that and was like, "crap" just make sure he doesn't "get in your way" of things Jules...DO NOT let your gaurd down. and don't let him talk sh*t about Amber either. one thing i've learned about Dan is that he is manipulative. personally i think he's asking you to write to vent -like he already did- about Amber -who is your closest cousin-whom you know everything about -which maybe Dan is trying to get some info from you about her or insight to some stuff...which probably won't end good if he gets his hands on it. or maybe I'M overanalyzing and he's changed and i know nothing! lol just be careful is all i'm saying, and protect your family. i know you will .
Well babe, let me get going, i have to go to chorus a little early today so i'll ttyl!
luv (and like) you bunches...
~*Amanda*~
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amajules
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2003 1 November :: 11.21pm
:: Mood: assured
:: Music: ~free worship~
a friend is someone who sees right through you and still enjoys the view
Hey Amanda!
you are right - - things have been going extremely well, - and there's no doubt in my heart and mind that it's because of the GRACE of God.. phew. i'm in the middle of reading the book that my mom gave me, and i'm not sure quite how to explain it, but in a way it's been refining me... at the same time tho, i haven't fully been letting it do so (meaning: thinking, praying, working on what this book has been pointing out to me) and so anyway yeah what's been going on in my head a few of the days this past week:
i'm scared. you haven't written to me, oh no, i'm no longer your closest friend... i'm scared and that's just it. you are my closest friend, and i don't ever have to refrain myself from telling you what's on my mind. if i say something wrong in front of you, that's okay. and if i fart in front of you (lol remember that!?) that's okay too. haha... anyway so yea. it's very scary to be vunerable - especially with someone you care so much about - - without the security of knowing i'm loved in spite of every ugly thing about me. i know it's awful to think that way - because goodness, i know better - not just because i know our friendship is solid - but because even if it wasn't - even if you were to decide one day that you no longer like me (and yea, there's a difference between like and love - you can love me - but do you LIKE who i am?) i should know that my stability, my WORTH comes from God only...so yea, i'm working on that. it was one of my weaker more depressing days i guess - things with my friend John had been pretty quiet - - and lauren: i said maybe 2 words to her in the midst of two days, because i just needed to not talk to her for a while... and so yea there's pretty much my explanation. selfish pity...
speaking of which - two of my friends are needing my help - one is suicidal (yes i've gotten other help) but goodness, it's hard for me not to think "what is God thinking?" putting these people into my path - i'm not strong enough to lift someone else up, and i'm certainly not the greatest at encouraging anyone... ESPECIALLY if they are not Christian - this girl just doesn't have any faith that God can help her. so i'm not going to shove God down her throat - - but when she cries out to me for help, or is like, "yea, i didn't eat today." what am i supposed to say? ugh, i don't even think about it because i get annoyed.
but back to the first topic -- one of the good things about you being in SC and me being here - is letting Him work in me, because of the fact that i don't have a best friend to constantly rely on. you know? i mean you're always here, but you're not HERE. and God is - therefore there's more of a reason for me to allow Him to take that place in my life.
but okay, next.
how did halloween go? i could so picture you as cleopatra haha - did you win? oh, and NO i haven't seen ANY pictures from prom!!! i have no idea what this randy man looks like. tsk tsk.
and of course, let me know how sarah is doing... renee is also not doing too too well. she puts up a good front. but she is really struggling. if you somehow end up talking to her, don't mention anything about me mentioning that. just keep her in prayer. its as if she sees her work load as insurmountable and never ending - - barely has time for herself, rarely has a break - she's very very overwhelmed, and i'm not sure how well she's handling it all. aw, ~wave of love for my sis~
alrite. one more thing and then i'm gonna go. dan has been asking me to email him. and so, due to his persistance, one day i did. he emailed me back, i emailed him back... and then his second email to me he decided to vent. about amber. and so now i have to write back, i've already been putting it off for too long... but i've been extremely careful since this whole email thing - there's no longer a connection for me there with dan - but if i ever let my guard down, who knows? where it stands right now, is that we're friends. i don't understand why he wanted me to email him so badly. but why overanalyze?
okay, well i'm done. time for bed; i've been extremely exhausted -- on thursday night i was so tired that i didn't even do any homework - i came home from swimming, ate dinner, and was sleeping by 8pm. totally dead asleep. ha.
okay well, good night my love
thanks so much for being you. i love you. :) (and like you too! hehe)
nighty night.
Julie xo
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amajules
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2003 30 October :: 10.59am
:: Mood: I LOVE YOU!!!
memories, all alone in the moonlight.....CATS (the musical)
omg i read our intrests and i started crying Jules...at first it was a chuckle, a giggle, a laugh, a roar, that developed into tears w/ "i miss you" in each one. i forgot about that Jerry Springer show one... and also, i thought we broke the table at your house remember w/ Amber....hey do you remember Bianca the Beautician?!?! ha ha!
anyways, so this Fri is a costume/Halloween party and Randy and i are going as Cleopatra and Marck Anthony...cute huh? we're shooting for the "Cutest Couple" award! lol o God Julie i can't wait for you to meet him. have i shown you pics, i think you saw our prom pic right?
anyways...what's up babe? i know i haven't been on lately, but i've been sooooo busy and then on top of that this computer in my 2nd block class...where i always type you at...was on the fritz for a loooong time
but, what's w/ that recent message huh? what's going on in that Curly head of yours?everything seemed like it was going so well, and if it's cuz I'VE been distant ...which i have, but i couldn't help it...i'm sorry. actually i was about to call you last night, but Josh called and asked if i could watch Matty for him..P.S. pray for Sara she's been sick since Sat (25th..i think) and still is sick, the doctors think it started as a bug, but developed into a bladder infection, i'm fighting a nasty cold that's got me snezzy everwhere i go. lol..i sneezed while i was talking. it just sneaked up on me, i looked like i had a seizure!!! hahaha.....ahhhh man. <--lol
anyways, i'm bout to go to the chorus room....i don't think i'll get a chance to call you this weekend but i'll try tonight, but Josh might need to watch Matthew, and i need to put some finishing touches on me and Randy's costumes...he's picking me from school today so he can come home and try on some stuff...but anyways
i love you Julie-grl and you've been in my prayers especially since we haven't been talking as much... i love you!
~*Amanda*~
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amajules
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2003 29 October :: 10.37pm
i feel so distant from the people i'm normally close to.
it's hard. all relationships are a risk.
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amajules
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2003 26 October :: 11.15pm
Hey Manda - -
Sooo much has happened, i'm not sure what i want to tell you and what i should leave out because (take a wild guess: ) i don't have a lot of time!!
so i'll give you a briefing
but first off - about the car accident - i don't think i realized the reality of the danger you were in at all ... i can't imagine that experience ever happening - - i read what you wrote to my mom, and she got goosebumps when i got to the end - wow, from Africa he called... that's amazing Amanda
thank God nothing happened to you... - any idea what condition the guy is in? did he survive? i can't believe the car landed on the ROOF..
sigh so anyway i want to tell you some things...
things have been relievingly good, i have been living and praying and just... being alive. it's such a relief to do so.. to be able to live with my mistakes, and take them, place them into God's hands, learn from them, and have peace and assurance as a result.. you know? ah, it's such a blessing and relief.. to let myself be human..
alrite so here goes..
first, the most exciting thing for me - -
was my swimming championships on saturday ... oh my goodness amanda, it was such an exciting day, i had been so anxious and nervous that i wouldn't accomplish my goals for the times that i wanted to swim - i wanted to cut off a certain amount of seconds off of my times - - i outdid my expectations! i improved sooo much and swam so amazingly well and omg i wish you could've been there to see me i still can't get over how exciting it was for me... and it was the first time that krista was able to see me swim, and my team mates were so supportive and my coaches were jumping up and down for me and wow... all my work paid off, it's the best feeling in the world, i never want to forget.. God helped me to care about my swimming, to care about reaching my goals, giving me something to strive for and achieving it.. it's been so long since i've actually felt accomplished...
what else..
i am trying out for drama - - we're doing the play Oliver, and i'm hoping to get one of the roles - Bet - - if i get her, i'm also the understudy for the lead role... i know i'm capable, it's just a matter of actually getting up in front of the directors, center stage, and showing them what i can do... i hope i have the confidence to do that - - if you get this on time, pray for me about that! auditions are either monday or wednesday
but anyway there's more but i gotta go...
i will write to you again soon!
i love you and miss you!
gnite
Jules xoxoxoxo
p.s. check out the profile hehehe
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amajules
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2003 22 October :: 8.56am
:: Mood: life is precious, and God remains awesome
Jules, i witnessed the worst car accident i've ever seen in my life. the guy was right in front of me, clipped the car in front of him, went fying off the road, flipped three times, over a ditch, took out a tree, into the parking of the Wachovia bank, landed on the roof,...at this point i watched in horror saying O my God, a gazillion times, the guy came flying out of the PASSENGER side window hit the pavement and rolled off the sidewalk! the car then rolled to its tires and all of it happened in about 10 seconds.
Julie, the awesome thing is, i got home and dad was at the mens bible study meeting, and when he got home he said that Pastor Peter from Africa had called FROM AFRICA to tell Pastor Dick and the church to pray for car accidents. Dad said they started praying at like 8:45 and the accident happened @ 9:00. God was truely w/ me last night Jules, b/c that car could of hit the ditch and bounced right back into the road into my car.
But yeah let me get going i got work to do. but Jules i love you and i miss you ! ttyl babe
luv ya Julie-grl
~*Amanda*~
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amajules
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2003 21 October :: 10.40am
soooooo sorry
~~~* i'm soooo sorry for not writing you sooner....the computer in my calss is all screwy and i can't get on to anything.....but, i don't know where all my pictures are. Sorry. um...what else...uh CUT YOUR HAIR ALREADY!!!! and if it's bad....hair grows back.
besides that i got an offer to move out and live w/ three girls and rent a house in Carolina Forest after graduation and then rent it for 3 yrs. after that the 2 girls will be transferring out and Randy and i will most likely be either already married, or just married. and he'll move in there and that'll be our house! Wow, everything's moving so fast. kinda freaky. yeah but i gotta get to chorus and sing LA LA LA! lol but tell Mike i said Happy b-day, and the noise you heard when you calleed is the fax machine if no one's home and the answering machine is off the fax will pick it up. sorry about that. anyways...Sorry So Short darling stuff has been hectic around here. but i've been thinkin' about you constantly. i miss you........*(sigh)* g2g babe
luv you Julie-girl,*~~~
~*Amanda*~
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