I'm tired but still wide awake.
I feel incomplete tonight. My relatives are visiting from Germany. We all drove over to Port Charlotte in two seperate cars earlier this afternoon. There's Barbara (second cousin, favorite bands include Rush and AC/DC,) her husband Bertrum (I'm not sure if I spelled that right, he's super passive, really nice guy) and their two daughters, Louisa (third cousin, just turned 11 today, she's extremely adorable and Bertrum lead on that she may be a pyro) and Mya (third cousin, 15 years old, really shy, likes Avril Lavigne.) The girls rode with my mom and Toby and I rode with Barbara and Bertrum in their rental car and we talked the whole way over. I'd met Barbara before but I was only like 14 and too involved in whatever huge drama was important to me at the time. She remembered I liked the Cranberries though. She said I could come stay with them in Germany anytime. I'll probably take her up on the offer next year. If I wanted, I could also stay in London with my second cousin, Denise, or with yet another second cousin, Dahgmar. When I was younger, they would visit and I never really paid much attention because well, they all just talked in german to eachother and to my gramma, and I was just a kid anyway, what would we talk about, what did we have in common? Now that I'm older, I'm more interested in getting to know them. I'm more intrigued I guess. So anyway, they wanna see some alligators. Visitors to Florida are all about the alligators and the everglades. I don't get that, I mean I guess they're not used to it but the everglades are just so ugly and boring. I want mountains and fieds of flowers!! Not swampy mush and sawgrass. We all went out to dinner tonight to this place in Punta Gorda. All 13 of us. My mom, my brother, my brother's girlfriend Priscilla, my gramma, my uncle Ralph and my Aunt Pattie, my cousin Jon (just got back from Iraq,) and his girlfriend Randolyn (also just got back from Iraq, 30 weeks pregnant,) myself and then Barbara, Bertrum, Louisa and Mya. I had like, half a chicken (yeah i felt bad, it looked too.. "hi we just killed this chicken and slapped some bbq sauce on it for you") a sweet potato (mm) and broccoli. Priscilla and I split a black raspberry martini. Jon kinda upset me. I didn't let him know he did. I was asking him and Randolyn about Iraq and stuff and I asked if people in Iraq were rude to him, because some of them don't want the US there. And he replied with something like "They never said anything to me but if they did I'd just stick a pistol in their mouth." And I was just like, really taken back by that. I mean this is my cousin. The same cousin who I'd always kind of favored growing up cause he'd always stuck up for me and included me when my brother and other cousin wouldn't. I dunno. He said that and then I replied with something like "are you serious? that's horrible." and he sat there looking at his plate for a second and then he looked up at me and was like "Why?" And I was just like "I dunno, I just don't really like violence." And he shot all these stupid things back at me like, "That's the only way to get things, how do you think we got to living here, (America).. We stole it!" After that I was just like.. "Eghh let's not talk about it." I mean what the hell? Why do people have to think like that? I told my dad about it and he said the army brainwashes kids. Guess they got to my cuz Jon Haley, cause those were some harsh words and opinions. I don't hate him or anything now, we still talked and laughed a ton at dinner and everything, it just sort of lowered the light I'd seen around him all these years. I think I just got my second wind. I'm not so tired anymore. Mom and I and the Germans are gonna go to the beach tomorrow, and then probably do a little shopping. Which, obviously, due to my on-going unemployment, I won't be hands-on participating in. Unless my mom feels bad for me. Buuut I'm guessing she won't. Ah well. I recently realized that most of the clothes I bought in the past six months, I barely even wear anyways.
I'm off to force myself into slumber.
Farewell.

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