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2004 5 February :: 10.53pm
:: Mood: okay
:: Music: backstreet boys<3
Maybe things aren't as bad as I make them be, maybe I should start looking past things.
Jackie said to me today, that maybe I'm over analyzing a situation. It made me realize, all I do is over-analyze. I think that's my problem. I think I just need to sit back, relax, and just go with the flow. Maybe that's my problem? I dont know, but I dont think listening to these "love songs" and all this other sad stuff around me can help my situation. I'm going to make a goal for myself, I'm gonna try hard too. I'm going to try and change, but for the better. I'm going to try and sit back and just let things take place, stop getting attached, and attempt to be a little more outgoing. I'm going to try and quit old, bad habits, and maybe I can take in some new good ones. So thank you for everyone who has caused my sadness, and thank you to those who have done nothing but help. I think I just needed a wake up call, and I think today I might have gotten one. Will see where this goes.
<3mandyy
x to the o.
p.s. Ryan, I didn't lie, I promise. I was installing this SAT prep thing, and once it was done my mom came in wanting to look at it. I'll tell you, I promise, I wasn't lying. =)
p.s.s. Jackie, thank you, for all my bullshit, Imma make it up to you, how about that parking lot driving on Saturday<333
5 hallas |
halla back
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skittlicious
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2004 1 February :: 3.51pm
:: Music: skye sweetnam // billy s
I am her garden, her legacy.
Let's see what's new in my life:
*I miss my woohu journal, livejournal has just taken over my brain.
*I really like him, a lot.
*I love my new job, but miss the theatre people.
*I love getting paid $7.25, it's absolutely amazing.
*Im starting to love my shitty car
*I miss some people being in my life, a lot.
*Me and Paige bonded a lot on saturday, it was nice, really nice.
*I hate spending my money
*I really want him, hmm, this needs to happen, lmao.
okay, i'm off to work, woohoo, superbowl sunday, a bar filled with obnoxious people, woo, fucking hoo.
<3mandyy
x to the o.
5 hallas |
halla back
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skittlicious
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2004 29 January :: 1.47pm
I just had a very lovely lunch, sushi with Jenna and Mikey C. =)
Thanks Guys
<3mandyy
7 hallas |
halla back
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painttheskywithstars
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2004 26 January :: 3.55pm
:: Mood: killing time before work
:: Music: Death Cab For Cutie - 'Title and Registration'
You're no Elvis..
Last night i saw The Butterfly Effect.. holy shit that's an intense movie. It was an emotional rollercoaster. I highly recommend it to anyone, though. Besides.. Ashton Kutcher gets half naked in it.. hottt. I'd see it again. So my new found love is Death Cab For Cutie. Every once in a while i'll get a new band and love it to pieces.. a couple months ago it was Pilate, and now it's Death Cab. New Incubus album comes out soon.. very excited for that. Work time.. peace.
5 hallas |
halla back
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skittlicious
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2004 25 January :: 1.08am
I think its safe to say boredom took over me
7 hallas |
halla back
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skittlicious
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2004 23 January :: 3.56pm
:: Mood: i hate myself
feel for once what it's like to rebel now, I wanna break out now, let's go.
Dinner was nice with my dad, it was. My Mom is driving me nuts. I think she's more excited about my photo project then I am, I mean, yeah I'm happy for myself, but geeze, she needs to chill the fuck out. It's making me so discouraged. You know what one of the hardest things to do is? I'll tell you. So you become good friends with this guy, not best friends, or anything, just good friends. And then you realize that your falling for him, and your clueless on whether your feelings are mutual, but you would never dare to say anything, or act upon your feelings. He tells you about his girl problems and all the girls he likes and you do everything in your power to help him, and then..all you wanna do is do everything to stop him, but you can't. I hate being a girl, i hate being me, I hate everything. And ih ate my digital camera, all I wanna do is play with this one picture, and I dont know how the fuck to do it.
I wanna cry, that's all I want.
-mandyy
[[edit: contrary to populare belief, this isnt about ryan, sorry.]]
8 hallas |
halla back
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skittlicious
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2004 21 January :: 12.17pm
:: Mood: sick
:: Music: you and i both // jason m raz (sp?)
I'm breaking a habit, tonight!
Woohu is being really weird, and really gay. I woke up this morning on the couch in the living room and I have no fucking idea how I got there. But my back was killing me, and then i went to brush my teeth and my tooth started up again, so I stayed home today, i have a dentist appt at 2, and I have to go to the bank and such. So Ill get that stuff down, oo, that reminds me. Math homework. I went into work on Monday, and I was double checking my schedule, and I see that my Wednesday night was whited out, and Lauren's Friday nght was crossed out...I broght Maggie over (another hostess) and showed her and asked what I should do? come in? stay home? she said for both me and lauren to stay home. Lauren found out last night that Kara, stupid fat bitch, crossed off her friday night on her own, w/o permission, and she can still come in. So now i have no fucking clue if I'm suppose to come in, or not. I feel like shit, I dont want to work, I want the money, my check is only gonna be 250, I was hoping for more. But whatever.
Gah, so this whole mauricio/pat situation, i guess i'm kind of over it, i mean who was I kidding? :-(
I'm off to go run some errands, and hopefully FIX MY TOOTH!
<3mandyy
until the next time I can sneak on the computer, ill see ya whenever
halla back
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painttheskywithstars
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2004 21 January :: 1.29am
:: Mood: everything all at once.
:: Music: Taking Back Sunday
the truth is you could slit my throat and with my one last gasping breath i'd.. spit in your fucking face.
nevermind.
1 halla |
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skittlicious
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2004 19 January :: 2.05pm
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: me vs. the world
I would give you the world, just so I could get some attention
This weekend was okay, not the best. Sunday sucked, really bad. I woke up in a bad mood which just put me down for the rest of the day. My dad and I argued a lot, which I hate, and then I felt guilty, but I guess we're okay? I left my dads around 3, and went to work to get my schedule, I'm working Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Sunday, so that will keep me busy, and hopefully keep my mind off things. I went to blockbuster after that and rented myself three movies, just so I could lounge the rest of the day. I rented Freaky Friday, Uptown Girls, and How to Deal. I watched Freaky Friday and Uptown Girls last night, both amazing. I really needed the chick flick movie night, made me feel better. This morning I woke up, brought my car to the shop, mom picked me up, we ate lunch, mom stayed at work, and I took her car with me home. I have to work at 6, so either I'm goin with her to get my car, or her and my step dad are later this evening, eitehr way, I need my car back, damn breaks. I think I'm gonna go watch How to Deal now, cause I'm in a mandy moore mood, I dont know when I'll update again..I'm grounded, I need to keep reminding myself that.
<3mandyy
x to the o.
halla back
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painttheskywithstars
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2004 18 January :: 2.39am
:: Mood: cluttered.
:: Music: The New Amsterdams - 'Losing You'
.After many calenders have fallen.
Fear has dissolved through thin fingers and sad eyes.
Gray tendencies occur and reoccur.. life is seemingly easy when put together in puzzle piece form. click. and it fits. time, it's ever so slow..
But it flows.
This is the time.
It's a beautiful sky, but don't try and hold on with photos that will only fade to black.
Utopia breathes strong beneath a thousand sunsets.
Just wait.
1 halla |
halla back
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skittlicious
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2004 14 January :: 4.04pm
:: Mood: exhausted
:: Music: fefe dobson // take me away <33
This is the night!
Getting ready for work, listening to FeFe Dobson, I like her, a lot. 'm excited about working, I like where I work, but not as much as I liked the theatre, I miss the theatre, a lot. Jess is leaving the theatre too ;x
I'm suppose to go and chill in deerfield with some of them this weekend, hopefully it'll go through.
I really like Mauricio and I can't have him for more than one reason
My head hurts like a bitch
Sarah's dad's car got fucked up, people are so fucking dumb, i hate people.
I still haven't done my photo project and I'm gonna end up screwing up again.
On a lighter note, my project got into the scholstic art awards, heh, ive never gotten anything awknowledged before, so i'm pretty damn happy.
and i still like mauricio, just so that's clear
<3mandyy
x to the o.
3 hallas |
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skittlicious
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2004 13 January :: 11.16pm
If anyone has an extra graduation ticket that they are willing to sell to me, PLEASE let me know. Thank you m'loves.
<3mandyy
x to the o.
1 halla |
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skittlicious
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2004 12 January :: 10.46pm
I'm a theif, yeah yeah, but it was too cute to resist<3
success at...
age 4 not peeing your pants
age 12 having friends
age 17 having a drivers license
age 20 having sex
age 35 having money
age 50 having money
age 60 having sex
age 70 having a drivers license
age 75 having friends
age 80 not peeing your pants
lol, thanks alison<3
<3mandyy
x to the o.
halla back
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painttheskywithstars
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2004 12 January :: 1.59am
:: Mood: good
:: Music: Something Corporate - Konstantine.. 9 minutes and 35 seconds of pure amazingness.
.I had these dreams, in them I learned to play guitar, maybe cross the country, become a rockstar.
Tonight was such a great night. Hung out with Lindsay, Greg, The Cheeseburger Club, met this guy Derek (obsessed with Sigur Ros, and set out to spread how wonderful they are rather than keeping it a beautiful secret for people like me and ben) who said I would be the coolest ever if I told him I liked sushi and frappachinos. I told him I didnt. I wasn't really trying to earn points with him anyways, I like my whole no-boyfriend lifestyle. Oh yeah, last night the ex called me at my work to bother me about some cd's i have of his.. and i was like "Uhh why are you bothering me with this drama at work?" Him - "Ooooh Fuck you!!" lol. I see. Well.. thank you? Didn't ruin my pleasant mood. I was food-running for the first time last night, and I kinda like it better cuz you're so much busier. Oh oh.. tonight, I got pulled over.. and i told the cop i didnt want a ticket and he was like "You dont? Then slow down" and that was it. I said thank you and drove away slowly and ever so cautiously. That was the nicest police man I have ever encountered. I <3 him.
6 hallas |
halla back
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skittlicious
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2004 11 January :: 10.34pm
Sorry to dan and lauren, but i have to test my pictures some way
1 halla |
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