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m&ms487
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2009 10 February :: 3.05pm
Rueben, I'm sitting up at a computer on the fourth floor of the library by the big windows because our phones don't work. Again.
Ahhh. I also forgot my literary theory book. See, I thought I was suppose to write a paper on this horrible forty page article about reader response theory and it turns out it's on the eleven page less scary one that I actually understood, except the only problem is that I didn't bring my book, so I can't do that paper. But, I did do my paper that is due on Friday for my Victorian Literature and Thought class, so I'm a little ahead, but still behind :(
It's super nice out today and I feel like I want to be outside but I'm stuck in here in the library because that's where Rueben knows I will be because our phones don't work because SOMEBODY didn't pay the bill. I guess we probably should have checked that out after what happened last time. Oh well. I think I'll go through and plan my future now. I'm not doing French anymore. Well, I am. I'm in French 102 this semester, but I'm NOT fulfilling my BA requirement and taking a whole nother year of it and killing myself. No siree. So, that means that I'm switching to a Bachelor of Science which won't be quite so bad and I really only have english class, political science classes and three science classes to take for it. Yippee.
AHH. I'm sick, too. bah. I'm feeling better since I wrote my paper and I know that it's fanfuckingtastic. I feel a little crazy right now. AHH. Woohudotcom. bah. Fifty more minutes until Rueben is done with his lab. Then I can go to the store, get my pills, buy some cookies, go home, write my other paper, maybe, go to uband, go to the concert, go home, go to bed, go to class, go to work, go home, go to bed......
l<3ve
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fishyrere
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2009 3 February :: 11.56am
The silence is killing me.
l<3ve
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fishyrere
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2009 5 January :: 2.09am
I want to get back to the way things used to be.
I don't want to be this person I've become.
This is my new year's resolution.
l<3ve
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fishyrere
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2008 26 December :: 6.35pm
My man put a ring on it.
:)
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l<3ve
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m&ms487
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2008 24 December :: 4.26pm
:: Mood: content
I'm home with the parents right now. I've been home for a few days since my seniority at work actually got me valuable time off for once. I've leaving tomorrow afternoon, though, because I have to work at five thirty on the day after Christmas, although Meijer doesn't actually open until six.
I'm going to be alone for a few weeks since Rueben is staying down here to work and I have to go back to Mt. Pleasant to work. I've already planned on going on a baking frenzy to take up my time. I think I'm also going to start working out at the student activity center now that I'm feeling better.
And I am feeling better. I've been able to actually eat for about three weeks now. I've gained about ten pounds back, so I don't look so scary any more.
Grades are in, I got all B's and a B+ in my English class, and I'm okay with that. If I can pull all B's while almost dying, I think I did well.
I'm not looking forward to driving home tomorrow, but I think I'll be alright.
It was nice having a few days off, and I'll be ready when next semester starts in a few weeks.
l<3ve
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m&ms487
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2008 6 December :: 2.30pm
I turn 21 tomorrow.
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l<3ve
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m&ms487
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2008 17 November :: 12.01pm
I have a french exam in one hour that I am not prepared for.
I'm fairly sure I just failed a math exam two hours ago.
But I think I'm going to be okay, and that's all that really matters right now.
[edit] I think the French exam went all right and I've almost eaten an entire tray of sushi. Yippee.
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l<3ve
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m&ms487
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2008 10 November :: 2.58pm
I haven't updated in a while. I haven't had time. No. That's incorrect. I haven't had the motivation.
Something is wrong. I'm sleeping all of the time and always tired. It's not depression. I went to the doctor's and they told me I had a viral infection and anemia. A week later, it should be better, but I slept for over twelve hours last night and I've been laying down every chance I get.
I went home on Sunday for a family reunion and the only things people said to me is that I look like a poster child for anorexia and I look tired. I've lost almost eighty pounds. I'm trying to stay stable at 130.
Although my test came back negative for mono, I still think I probably have it. Why else would I be so tired all of the time? Everything is suffering because of it: my grades, my attitude, my dealings with my friends and brothers.
I just want to wake up and be okay.
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l<3ve
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m&ms487
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2008 21 October :: 10.50pm
Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one laughing, the only one aware. I just can't shake the feeling that sometimes I see things in a way that no one else can even comprehend.
Central won against Western. For those of you who don't know, it's a big deal. There are five state troopers parked about two hundred yards away from my apartment to keep things "under control." This is probably the quietest Saturday night of the year as of yet.
l<3ve
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m&ms487
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2008 15 October :: 4.25pm
I am withdrawing from chemistry. It is going to make me a happier person.
I'm taking French and three literary theory classes next semester. Probably.
l<3ve
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