.j.e.s.s.
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2006 23 September :: 12.57pm
so something has been happening to me and i am allergic to something or something i dont know but my eyes feel like they are on fire and they are all red and itchy and UGLY. and right now i'm doing okay because i got some eye drops but they are so dry and ow they hurt and
i'm not doing that great right now. in fact i'm pretty angry. should i be? probably to some extent. ughghghghhg
1 Felt the pain... |
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 21 September :: 2.58pm
god i hate work so much. i hate the new menards. i miss the old people. i hate work so much, i skipped it yesterday. and if they ask me for an excuse i think i'll just shrug because i do not have one other than the fact that i hate it. but i dont know if i should look for another job or what.. it's realy good pay and i can usually get 40 + hours if i want them. (god this lady behind me, i'm at the library, will not stop fucking talking to her self .... shut up!) i sreiously think i contemplate skipping work every single day i am scheduled to go in. i hate it so much.
i have been trying to get switched into a dept but nobody needs more people and thy all just laugh when i say i hate being a cashier because "all cashiers wnat to be switched into a dept." seriously i hate it. i've htought about going back to waitressing but that is never sure money and i dont know if i want to go back to it because you have to be so nicde. i like working at menards only because if i'm mean, i dont lose my tip... .because i never had one .... you get it.
but yeah i really can't stand working there and i'm even changing my availabilty so i only have 4 available days to work instead of 5. how bad is that?! i mean, it will help with me being able to get school work done easier too but other than that im pretty much just doing it because i can get by without that extra day, i'm can pick up hours if need to because peolpe are always asking people to pick up shifts and most of all I HATE WORKING THERE!
i think maybe ij ust get like this with every job i have.... it's like after 6 months i cna't take anymore. waiiiiit a second, i worked at arbys for a whole year. ugh what am i doing.
i dont know what to do. i would love to work at a day care maybe or something... but i dont think i could get 8.20 and 10.60 on weekends. not many places can beat that.
blkaj;lkdfja;lskdfja;skjflakjsflkajs;fkjas;lkfj i have to leave for work in like 25 minutes. i hate menards so freaking much. i've worked there for over a month and still i dont feel like i know anyone there. nobody is like ...easy to approach. i think i'm scared of like all of them. ughghghgh they are dumb! and i hate it!
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 19 September :: 4.09pm
so seriously, i have the best boyfriend in the world.
How does it feel?
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 18 September :: 10.09am
i really hate stupid college girls.
just like i hated stupid high school girls.
god dont be in school if you're an idiot.
6 Felt the pain... |
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 11 September :: 11.44am
it's 9/11
and i just kind of wish i had been older when it happened because i really want to do soemthing....as
dfkajsd
flksdj
aslkdfj
and any way some people here (at college) are SO STUPID but i
yess
oh and i seriously love this new going out all the time lifestyle that roman and i have created.
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just_peachie
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2006 11 September :: 2.43am
:: Mood: nauseated
God, please...don't let it be.
:'(
2 Felt the pain... |
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swimfan14
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2006 10 September :: 1.29am
I don't know why that bothered me so much, but it just did.
2 Felt the pain... |
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 6 September :: 11.28am
so i had my first class just a minute ago and the professor is really nice and funny. and it all seems okay. it just pisses me off that so many of these kids don't have jobs.
lazy asses. ugh
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swimfan14
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2006 4 September :: 12.23am
So long sweet summer
I stumbled upon you and gratefully basked in your rays
So long sweet summer
I fell into you
Now you're gracefully falling away
Hey thanks
Thanks for that summer
It's cold where you're going
I hope that your heart's always warm
I gave you the best
Gave you the best that I have
So, so long sweet summer
I stumbled upon you and gratefully basked in your rays
So long sweet summer
I fell into you
Now you're gracefully falling away
I hate the winter, in Lexington
I hate the winter, in Lexington
In Lexington, Lexington, Lexington.
How does it feel?
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candikisses2010
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2006 30 August :: 11.23am
HELP ME
OMG I don't know what to do, I kno not to many people will see this so I feel safe puttin it on here and if you do see it I trust you so... I have a boyfriend but I am still jealous of my ex... I think about him alot and I still get jealous when I hear about him w/ other girls... but he doesn't tell me when he gets w/ other girls and we usually talk about everything... but not that why?? Iwould like to know and not get on myspace and read about it in his and her comments.... AAAAAUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH why why why why do I care we haven't been together for like 2 years but I still have feelings for him and I hate to admit it I hate it b~cuz I know he doesn't feel the same or at least I think I know but I dont want to ask him cuz I dont want to ruin our friendship what do I do.... HELP HELP HELP HELP
2 Felt the pain... |
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just_peachie
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2006 28 August :: 10.07pm
If only you would just sing it to me...
I have to block out thoughts of you
so I don’t lose my head
They crawl in like a cockroach
leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape
to remind me that I’m alone
Playing movies in my head that
make a porno feel like home
There's a burning in my pride,
a nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you.
Will you never call again?
And will you never say that you love me
just to put it in my face?
And will you never try to reach me?
It is I that wanted space
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
I’m sober now for 3 whole months it’s one
accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart
is the one thing I won’t touch again
In a sick way I want to thank you
for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself,
you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions
on things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself
when it was way too hard to take
So I’ll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn’t do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you
And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
Until I saw your blue eyes cry and I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling “make it go away!”
Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered “How can you do this to me?”
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn’t do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you
2 Felt the pain... |
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just_peachie
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2006 27 August :: 6.52pm
:: Mood: Empty shock
How could someone be that cruel? I thought shit like this only happened in the movies. I honestly didn't think I would ever meet someone so heartless and fake in my life. And to think that I was with the unbelievable for a year and a half, and only now just find out the true oneself. And to know that I was the one who was made to feel crazy because of the 1,000's of times I called it out I was miraculously right because I knew this foul being inside and out. Oh, the 1,000's of faflse reassurances I was given. But the keyword is false. I was right all along. I was cohersed into not believing in myself, and I am ashamed that I was. How could I let someone tell me who I am and who I will be? I don't think I've ever felt so foolish in my life.
He is
FAKE
1. prepare or make (something suspecious, deceptive, or fraudulent): to fake a report showing nonexistent profits.
2. to conceal the defects of or make appear more attractive, interesting, valuable, etc., usually in order to deceive
3. to pretend; simulate: to fake illness.
4. to accomplish by trial and error or by improvising: I don't know the job, but I can fake it.
5. to trick or deceive (an opponent) by making a fake (often fol. by out)
9. anything made to appear otherwise than it actually is; counterfeit: This diamond necklace is a fake.
10. a person who fakes; faker: The doctor with the reputed cure for cancer proved to be a fake.
11. a spurious report or story.
13. designed to deceive or cheat; not real; counterfeit.
Synonyms: affected, artificial, assumed, bogus, concocted, counterfeit, fabricated, false, fictitious, forged, fraudulent, invented, make-believe, mock, phony, pretended, pseudo*, reproduction, sham*, simulated, spurious
noun: actor, bastard*, bluffer, bum, bunk, bunko, charlatan, cheat*, counterfeit, deception, deke, fabrication, faker, flimflam, forgery, four-flusher*, fraud, gold brick, gyp, hoax, imitation*, imposition, imposture, junque, make-believe, mountebank, phony, pretender, pretense, pseudo*, put on, reproduction, scam, sell, sham*, sleight, spoof, swindle, trick
CHEAT
verb (used with object)
1. to defraud*; swindle: He cheated her out of her inheritance.
2. to deceive*; influence by fraud: He cheated us into believing him a hero.
3. to elude*; deprive of something expected: He cheated the law by suicide.
–verb (used without object)
4. to practice fraud or deceit: He cheats without regrets.
5. to violate rules or regulations: He cheats at cards.
7. Informal. to be sexually unfaithful (often fol. by on): Her husband knew she had been cheating all along. He cheated on his wife.
–noun
8. a person who acts dishonestly, deceives, or defrauds: He is a cheat and a liar.
11. an impostor: The man who passed as an earl was a cheat.
Synonyms- con man, conniver, cozener, crook, deceiver, decoy, defrauder, dodger, double-crosser*, double-dealer*, enticer, fake, hypocrite***, impostor, jockey, knave, masquerader, pretender, quack, rascal, rogue, scammer*, shark, sharper, shyster, swindler, trickster
MALICIOUS
Having the nature of or resulting from malice; malicious gossip.
1. full of, characterized by, or showing malice; malevolent; spiteful: malicious gossip.
2. Law. vicious, wanton, or mischievous in motivation or purpose.
Synonyms: awful, bad-natured, baleful, beastly, bitchy, bitter, cussed, deleterious, despiteful, detrimental, envious, evil, evil-minded*, green*, green-eyed*, gross*, ill-disposed, injurious, jealous, low, malevolent, malign, malignant, mean, mischievous, nasty, noxious, ornery, pernicious, pesky, petty, poison-pen, poisonous, rancorous, resentful, spiteful, uncool*, vengeful, venomous, vicious, virulent, wicked
5 Felt the pain... |
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 23 August :: 6.44pm
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DOES SOMEONE WANT MY CAT
HIS NAME IS ELVIS . HE IS BEAUTIFUL AND FUN AND FULL OF LIFE AND WONDERFUL AND I CAN'T TAKE CARE OF HIM AT MY APARTMENT WITH WORKING AND SCHOOL AND I DONT WANT HIM TO BE TRAPPED IN AN APT. AND MY PARENTS DONT WANT HIM
PLEASE SOMEONE WHO WILL BE A GOOD KITTY PARENT.
PLEASE
2315809564 IF YOU WANT TO...
9 Felt the pain... |
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 20 August :: 1.54pm
okay so just a little update on my life
i wake up with roman
go to work
come home
do dishes, clean, maybe go for a run and get yelled at
make food
go to bed witih roman
never get on the internet
and go to the beach alot.
hooray
ookay so i went for a run the other day and this guy driving by yells at me "IF YOU DIDN'T EAT SO MUCH, YOU WOULDN'T HAVE TO JOG, BITCH!!!"
How fucking mean is that?
so then i cried and went home.
and i'll never run again (not really)
dickhead.
but in all seriousness, the thing that made me the most upset hearing that was that people can say stuff like that and honestly not feel bad.
take a look at yourself people. honestly.
5 Felt the pain... |
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 20 August :: 1.34pm
bomb! this is the first time since moving i've been able to use my lap top. i found wireless at the hojo (howard johnson) hotel on 28th street, about 5 minutes from my house so awesome... yay.
um anyway, i gotta do some stuff so just wanted to say, hello woohu. and now good day.
ps. life is pretty good.
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