Extremely Strange.......

:: 2006 7 April :: 11.07am

i just cleaned my little sisters room for 2 hours.... now im cleaning my room.

*thumb down

:: 2006 7 April :: 5.21am

i went up to my grandma's yesterday.. she lives about 40 minutes away in whitecloud in the middle of the woods. and i was about to leave, it was around 10:00.... and she looked out the window and there was a BLACK BEAR!!!! OMG! it was HUGE and it was like 10 feet away from the window standing on its back legs reaching up at the bird feeder! it was SO cool! they get bear every year so they werent suprised or anything, but i was like HOLLLLYYYY... lol. when we would go to TN thats one of the things we'd look forward to, was seeing black bear.. and here i am in MICHIGAN, 40 minutes away from my house and theres a full grown black bear 5 feet away from my car! it was crazy! its a good thing she looked out the window before i walked outside... i probably would have had a heart attack. i couldnt believe i was looking at a BEAR! so yeah... that was my excitement yesterday..

How does it feel?

:: 2006 5 April :: 10.43am

EDIT: I meant to post this 3 days ago lol.

Oh , I'M SORRY....SHOULD I HAVE USED THE CUT TAG?!?!!?!!?!?!?! OOPS.

Part One:
Have you ever had a song written about you? yeah my song from roman on guitar....awwwww.lol
What song makes you cry? i duno. anything if i'm in that kind of mood.
What song makes you happy? my humps
What do you like to listen to before bed? i listen to music all night. right now it's elvis and some other cds

Part Two:
HEIGHT: 5'1 i think
HAIR COLOR: dark brown kinda
SKIN COLOR: eh.. i need to go tanning
EYE COLOR: Blue
PIERCINGS: ears and cartilage
TATTOOS: Not yet maybe later

Right Now:
WHAT COLOR PANTS ARE YOU WEARING? Gray sweatpants.
WHAT SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? blue sweatshirt .
SONG ARE YOU LISTENING TO? where'd you go
WHAT TASTE IS IN YOUR MOUTH?: cereal of course
WHAT'S THE WEATHER LIKE?: 39 degrees
HOW ARE YOU? well lets just say another shitty ass day down..
GET MOTION SICKNESS?: Sometimes in cars
HAVE A BAD HABIT?: Yeah

Favorite...
CONDITIONER: dove
MAGAZINE: whatever
NON-ALCOHOLIC DRINK: choc milk
ALCOHOLIC DRINK: long islands
THING TO DO ON THE WEEKEND: be with roman
BAND OR GROUP or SINGER or RAPPER: Too many but rapper = jay z

Have you:
BROKEN THE LAW: yup
RAN AWAY FROM HOME: yup
SNUCK OUT OF THE HOUSE: too much
EVER GONE SKINNY DIPPING: no
MADE A PRANK PHONE CALL: all the time bitches GOTCHA
USED YOUR PARENTS' CREDIT CARD BEFORE: no only when they let me for their own gas or groceeries
SKIPPED SCHOOL BEFORE: too much
FELL ASLEEP IN THE SHOWER/BATH: No.
BEEN IN A SCHOOL PLAY: kinda
LET A FRIEND CRY ON YOUR SHOULDER: yeah

Love: roman
Boyfriend: roman bryan garcia-nastally
SEXUALITY: i like boys not girls
CHILDREN: yeah want em
CURRENT CRUSH: roman
BEEN IN LOVE?: am in
HAD A HARD TIME GETTING OVER SOMEONE: yeah kevin lol
BEEN HURT?: yeah
YOUR GREATEST REGRET: probably shoplifting
MADE OUT WITH A SOMEONE YOU ONLY KNEW FOR THREE DAYS: no

Random:
DO YOU HAVE A JOB: yeah . 2
YOUR CD PLAYER HAS IN IT RIGHT NOW: a cd i made and then upstairs is elvis and 2 cds i made
IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?: sparkle
WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY?: being away from daily life
WHO MAKES YOU THE HAPPIEST?: roman,easily

Have you ever:
CRIED WHEN SOMEONE DIED: no
WANTED SOMEONE YOU KNEW YOU COULDN'T HAVE: no
BROKEN A BONE: yeah
DRANK ALCOHOL: Yeah
LIED: Yah
CRIED IN SCHOOL? yeah too much

Yes or No:
You keep a diary: yeah
You have a secret journal: i guess.. i dont really share it with anyone.
You set your watch a few minutes ahead: dont use one
You bite your fingernails: i justgot acryillics
You believe in love: yah

Do You:
Take a shower everyday: Almost every day.
Want to get married: Yes.
Think you're a health freak?: Definitely not.
Get along with your parents: no

Favorite:
NUMBER: 2
COLOR: pink.
DAY: sunday
MONTH: duno..july?
SONG: Wayyy too many.
FOOD: edy's mint choc. chip ice cream.
SEASON: Summer
SPORT: b ball .
VEGGIE: duno
FRUIT: apples and bannaasss.
FAST FOOD: arbys prob

IN THE LAST 24 HOURS, HAVE YOU:
CRIED? yeah
HELPED SOMEONE? Yeah , kiddies i babysit.
BOUGHT SOMETHING? Yeah
GOTTEN SICK? kinda
GONE TO THE MOVIES? No.
GONE OUT FOR DINNER? No.
SAID "I LOVE YOU"? Yes.
WRITTEN A REAL LETTER? No.
TALKED TO AN EX? No.
MISSED AN EX? no
WRITTEN IN A JOURNAL? This one.
TALKED TO SOMEONE YOU "CRUSH" ON? no
MISSED SOMEONE? Yes.
HUGGED SOMEONE? no
FOUGHT WITH YOUR PARENTS? yeah
FOUGHT WITH A FRIEND? no

WOULD YOU EVER:
1. Eat a bug? 8th grade crickets
2. Bungee jump? yeah
3. Hang glide? Maybe.
4. Kill someone? no
5. Have sex with someone you don't love? no
7. Parachute from a plane? probalbly not
8. Walk on hot coals? no
9. Go out with someone for their looks? no
10. For their reputation? no
11. Be a vegetarian? Probably not.
12. Wear plaid with stripes? .
13. IM a stranger? Maybe.
14. Sing karaoke? yeah
15. Get drunk? yeah.
16. Shoplift? I have before, but I won't again... so no.
17. Run a red light? try not to.
18. Dye your hair blue? no
19. Be on Survivor? no.
20. Wear makeup in public? Yes.
21. NOT wear makeup in public? hardly
22. Make someone cry? on accident
23. Kick a baby? no , moron
24. Date someone more than ten years older then you? no
25. Stay up all through the night? Probably

WHAT'S THE NEXT CD YOU'RE GONNA GET?: none
WHAT DO YOU LIKE TO DO?: be w/ roman and not have to do antyhign

When / What was the last...:
YOU GOT A REAL LETTER?: no idea
YOU GOT E-MAIL: Today
THING YOU PURCHASED: new shoes cuz my other fucking ones got stolen..
TV PROGRAM YOU WATCHED: i'm half watching this obese story
MOVIE YOU SAW AT THE THEATER: um i dont rmember
WHOS THE LAST PERSON(s) YOU'VE THOUGHT ABOUT?: roman

I AM: in a really bad mood
I WANT: money
I HAVE: no money
I WISH: a million tthing
I HATE: how my life is right now
I FEAR: i'm never going to lose this weight
I HEAR: stupid girls and tv
I WONDER: whats gonna go on tomorrow..
I REGRET: spending all the money i've made over the years.
I LOVE: roman
I ACHE:
I ALWAYS: eat.
I SING: loud in my car.
I CRY: all the time.

WHICH IS BETTER:
1. COKE OR PEPSI: diet coke
2. SPRITE OR 7UP:
3. GIRLS OR GUYS: guys
4. FLOWERS OR CANDY: Flowers
5. SCRUFF OR CLEAN SHAVEN:scruffy only on roman
6. QUIET OR LOUD: louder.
7. BLONDES OR BRUNETTES: brunettes

Just to piss all of you off. even more i suppose.

16 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2006 4 April :: 10.17pm

come on tap those brakes, baby just one time
well roman IS taking me to prom afterall. HOORAY and we're even doing something really fun and cute on that day too. but i'm not telling you what is until after we do it because i dont want you to steal it. I am actually like way excited for prom now. YAY . i just want everything to get on with.....yeah.

and well besides the fact i still don't have any friends and get ditched all the time and my boyfriend won't pick up his phone....

oh wow! life is great! (Oh, how I jest.)

pics. ...... aren't we cute. yeah , i know.

rockford dam. LOVE IT

aren't these glasses so cute. i really wanted them because they made me laugh.

swans!! i love swans!! so much! he is my friend actually.

psycho and my tongue looks weird.

um i love you dani pie so much. Cant wait for anotehr CMU bash together! April 22nd baby!

Brush em brush em brush em....

thanks for looking at those. will someone make me an icon please of the glasses one? or not. whatever. just THROWIN it out there!

...Jessabess

:: 2006 4 April :: 6.35pm
:: Mood: Confused

Our first little fight.....ahhh..

We could end up broken hearted, if we don't remember why all this started and if they try to tell you that love fades with time, tell them there's no such thing as time.

:: 2006 4 April :: 2.36pm

omg. i seriously CANNOT stop eating!

honestly. its like i am scrounging around for food like a rat or something. i can't stop. okay. i'm gonna go tie my own hands up so i can't eat anymore.

this is scaring me a little. AH!

2 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2006 3 April :: 9.59pm

Well these are fun...

Read more..

2 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2006 3 April :: 7.55pm

i cannnnt stannnnnd youuuuu..

learn to appreciate what you have at your fingertips. BITCH!

:: 2006 3 April :: 11.29am
:: Music: Trisha Yearwood: Angels in Waiting

spring break.... boring.. relaxing.. but boring. i asked keegan to get some days off.. but noo.. im alone all week during the day. both my best friends are gone.. so im stuck babysitting.

good news though.. my moms giving me her gand am! woooooo. im so excited. i have to finish paying it off.. but theres only 2 grand left on it. this is my graduation and birthday present. finally i'll have a NICE dependable car. i've ALWAYS loved her car... i really wanted it when i was queen cuz it was red.. lol, but nows good too! as soon as everythings set.. which i think is gonna be tomorrow... i need to start looking for another job. i REALLY wanna work at logans. not just because keegan works there, but because you make more money working there than most other resturants. keegans friend tommy works at Branns and said on a BUSY saturday night he walks out with 130.. but at logans on a busy saturday night servers walk out with around 190. hmmm... pretty big difference there.

i cleaned today... that was my excitement.

OH, my moms getting an Aztec. it's blue and BEAUTIFUL. i dont really like aztecs, but the color seriously makes it like the coolest vehicle ever. its so pretty.

one of the BEST love songs of all time is "hold on to me" by john micheal montgomery. download it. it reminds me SO much of me and keegan. we dont have a song yet though. odd... 17 months and we still dont have one. thats ok, it'll come to us. THATS right... 17 months and breaking up has never even been an option. i think when a relationship turns to an "on and off again" relationship.. its time to end it. because obviously neither person are happy anymore. personal opinion. whatever though... im just so happy. :)

could it be? are there still a few GOOD clingans? i must say... i thought hell must have froze over yesterday. chris is gone, and the rest of his family is FINALLY starting come around and respect my mom. throughout the divorce and even towards the end of their marriage.. the hardest part for me was seeing how my mom was being treated. she's the strongest woman i know. i cant imagine being one of those kids who "hates" their mom. she's the one thing that holds me together.

4 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2006 3 April :: 12.30pm
:: Mood: Excited
:: Music: Cascada-Everytime We Touch

I guess I'll update really quick.

Saturday we went to the beach all day and went to all the little shops and then we went to the pool which is an everyday thing for us.
Sunday we went to the pool and then we went to Johns Pass and shopped. It was really pretty there and it is all over the ocean and then we went out to dinner at this resturant on the ocean.
Today we are going out on the boat to go find dolphins and then we have a party to go to later.

There's this little boy named Jake that goes to the pool everyday and he's the cutest little boy ever. I am basically in love with him. I winked at him in the pool and he didn't even know what to do. He just smiled at me. Haha. I shall keep him.

Ahh this weird thing happened yesterday with these two boys that are staying in the same condo as us. I guess I'll explain it later since I'm out of time.

I dig my toes into the sand. The ocean looks like a thousand diamonds strewn across a blue blanket. I lean against the wind, pretend that I am weightless and in this moment I am happy.

I wish you were here
I wish you were here
I wish you were here
I wish you were here.

:: 2006 2 April :: 9.54am

pretty much even tv isnt safe anymore. stupid whore. uhh.

but anyways... yesterday keegan popped his shoulder out of joint again at practice. he picked me up from work and told me and i was like "yeah ok, i know what today is... hahaha" and he's like no really i did... and once again i was like "OK keegan"... but he actually did. poor thing. he brought me home this morning before he went to work, so now he has to carry plates all around and make it even more sore. *sad face* *kisses it to make it ALL better*

after tonight i dont work again until the 12th. woot woot. that'll be nice. washing dishes tonight however WONT be nice. at least i have a respectable job though... not dissing on anyone who works at a fast food restaraunt.. im just glad i can say i work at Metron where i record food acceptance and aid in properly nutritioning diabetics than i flip burgers and drench french fries in grease. its all good... i still hate my job though.

tonights a new desperate housewives AND Flavor of love.. which keegan and i got strangely addicted to because it's so stupid.

friday night keegan took me to disney on ice. it was really cool. we went last year too. we have so much fun at things like that. its wonderful. then we went to coldstone.. because that's simply the perfect end to a perfect date. OH and the BEST ice cream you can get there is (strawberry cheesecake ice cream with strawberries, rasberries, bananas, and pie crust) mmm.

lets see what else... i guess thats it. have a good spring break.

( i miss brandi and stacy... fricken COME HOME! )

3 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2006 1 April :: 10.57pm

Yeah, so...
I'm pregnant. What a suprise right.

Yeah.. well I figure I'll just do the ol' abort-0..

that'll take care of it. It's too much to handle right now. If anyone has a say on this, please speak up...

So anyway, I worked today. we were slow ... didn't make much money, I have 3 jobs right now and I need to quit one. it is way too hard.

I get to see roman tomorrow which is yay big fun. I dont know what we're gonna do but oh well.

I'm still not going to prom but i get a big suprise date which should be fun. And what else... I am just work work a workin...

Oh, and April Fools. I'm not preggy. Silly goose!

7 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2006 1 April :: 12.53pm

isnt it the greatest fucking feeling when you realize you have no fucking friends at all, your boyfriend is a jerk ,and all you wanna do is fukcing go fucking shoot yourself in the head but you dont have the guts and you have to work at 5

yeah fucking great. go to fucking hell. i swear all of you.

7 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2006 31 March :: 2.00pm
:: Mood: Happy

F-L-O-R-I-D-A
Well Lisa and I are here in Florida. It's 84 degrees right now :D.

We sat in first class on our plane. It's pretty much the only way to go. Once you sit in first class, you never want to go back to...half ass class or economy class. Whatever people call it these days. While everyone was getting served peanuts, we were getting served breakfast.

Yesterday we got here really early so we went to the pool most of the day, went shopping, went out to dinner, watched The O.C. (which was very dissapointing by the way.) and then we went to bed.

We just got back from the pool and now we're getting ready because in a while we are going to the pier to go shopping and then out to dinner.

I guess I really don't have anything else to say besides I miss everyone.

much love, ashley

I guess i'll take this really quick. Thanks pie.

Read more..

:: 2006 30 March :: 11.17pm

thank you to everyone who said i did good at the talent show. shannon said i missed 3rd place by like 3 points so that kinda sucks but oh well..

"I was hungry! Where's my dinner?!" lol..

and La Cookaratcha La cookatratcha.... lol

but i got to hang out with roman all night and he came to the show and it was fun and i just miss him. ugh i just hate like not seeing him more than once every other week. RAR.

but yeah, i'm glad i did it because it just makes one feel accomplished and whatnot. so... yup.

omg and roman was driving me home tonight and there was this bright light and i swear.. we were the only ones driving ... it was up in the sky this bright circular light just following us everywhere we drove... even when we turned on my road it was still following us. i was so scared i was like screaming and roman was freaking out to lol all while keeping his 'manly' stature of course. Only when we turned into my driveway did it go away and i think it's only because of that bright light we have up my driveway.. I duno, but it was like the first time I actually thought I believed there was like a ghost or something. AHH freaky! Seriously!

Oh and ONE more thing. that GIRL -*ahem, ahem ahem* Jess and Lindsey know who I'm talking about- has got the biggest head and today I just told her to shut up. Not really but in a nicer way . Like seriously, what the flip. UGH! I hate people like that. Shut up. You're not as cute as you seem to think you are.

-Jess