The sun shines so brightly, yet I feel so alone in the dark...

 

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Sadness will overcome this world...

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:: 2004 3 March :: 7.30 pm
:: Mood: stressed

*My prayer to God*....Lord...what is happening to me? Is my life changing for better? or for worse? I miss my mom a lot...and my dad is havin problems with money..I dont know if i can survive livin sometimes...my sisters fight so much...and it feels i have no where to turn...except you of course...and now thats what i am doin..i have this Gut feeling that something bad is happening in my life...does it have to happen now? all of a sudden boom everything in the world has landed on me...with so many questions about my mom...if my dad can make it with out my mom sending child supprt even though she is suppose to....theres so much....i just cant imagine what would happen....I miss my mom...I wish my dad was ok with life...I wish my sisters would grow up and not fight so much...well if you can figure this out for me i am here for your advice..thanks.

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:: 2004 3 March :: 7.27 pm

well Here i am again...today i had an alright day...I think i figured out my problem i am noticin how much i miss my mom. I have so many questions that cant be answered....Where is she? why is she doing this to us? Why cant she ever call us? does she love us anymore? does she want to be a mother? how can a mom do this to her kids? why would she just leave like this and not call...write..anything?

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:: 2004 2 March :: 9.09 pm

well today i am down in the dumps for some reason....I dont know...I want someone besides all my friends to talk to my problems about...not a counseler just like another guy that i can get along with or something. And I still have the feeling about my looks....i forgot about it for a while...but then saturday kevin had to bring it back up...and now i am back down in the dumps i think its cuz i like him...but i dont know why i do. it dont make since, oh well nothin ever will. But i also like another guy...he's really nice..but i kinda just met him. well anyways i have to go . Im out.

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:: 2004 1 March :: 8.02 pm

Well not much goin on....I went to Ashley Price's house tonight and we went to admiral gas station and ran into her dad there then we went to kevin and kellis and hung out with kevin in his room for a lil while...then went back to her house and i had to come home...so yeah....

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:: 2004 29 February :: 12.12 pm
:: Mood: content

You know....I just went and saw the movie *The Passion of The Christ* and it changed my whole perspective of things....we really dont know how much shit we are in for untill I seen him and how he took the whips and chains....it was aweful..I never cried so hard and so long for in my life...I was in shock at the same time. You would just have to see it...i am plugged up from crying so much....and my eyes are like swollen....they feel that way at least. I just cant explain it....you have to go see....its worth your money to go see. Unless you dont like to see bloodshed...or ppl seriously hurting other ppl cuz it has a lot of that in there.

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:: 2004 29 February :: 12.12 pm
:: Mood: content

You know....I just went and saw the movie *The Passion of The Christ* and it changed my whole perspective of things....we really dont know how much shit we are in for untill I seen him and how he took the whips and chains....it was aweful..I never cried so hard and so long for in my life...I was in shock at the same time. You would just have to see it...i am plugged up from crying so much....and my eyes are like swollen....they feel that way at least. I just cant explain it....you have to go see....its worth your money to go see. Unless you dont like to see bloodshed...or ppl seriously hurting other ppl cuz it has a lot of that in there.

~*Add something thats amazing*~


:: 2004 29 February :: 12.12 pm
:: Mood: content

You know....I just went and saw the movie *The Passion of The Christ* and it changed my whole perspective of things....we really dont know how much shit we are in for untill I seen him and how he took the whips and chains....it was aweful..I never cried so hard and so long for in my life...I was in shock at the same time. You would just have to see it...i am plugged up from crying so much....and my eyes are like swollen....they feel that way at least. I just cant explain it....you have to go see....its worth your money to go see. Unless you dont like to see bloodshed...or ppl seriously hurting other ppl cuz it has a lot of that in there.

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:: 2004 27 February :: 7.45 pm

YEEEEEEHAAAAWWWW! LOL Getting ready here for the Ho-Down...lol this should be fun..haha..

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:: 2004 26 February :: 10.06 pm

OK...lol I'm not kidding janice stop arguing with me...for real. Because do you think anyone care....do you think anyone gives you sypathy...because your fighting with me....no. Not even me. so shut up really and this is the last time i am writing about you in my journal because 1. i am sick of it 2. other ppl are sick of it 3. No one cares 4. I dont care 5 and five....you just need to shut up..OK well ttyl! *smiles and waves in a great mood* byes!!!!

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:: 2004 25 February :: 9.54 pm
:: Mood: excited

Hmmmm...
Ok i am really happy about a lot of things...things i dont even know about. that really dont make since its just that i am really happy lately for some reason...anyways ok I need to know ONE thing though....Janice seriously why do you put stuff in your journal about me...and then tell me to fuck off and say you dont care about me...really..it dont make any scense to me...but anyways other than that life is just PEACHY!!! nothin will get me down!! WOOWOOO! lol Im out..PEACE!

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:: 2004 25 February :: 5.56 pm

Well I think that many of My problems...are being solved....I dont know how...but i just been feeling really good lately.

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:: 2004 23 February :: 8.13 pm

JOey!! hey ummm...can i call you again? it was fun talking to you...I dont know if you wanted me too or not though...I mean yeah I dont know anyways umm reply back or something ok? i liked talking to you...I already said that ^^ up there here..lol..ttyl

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:: 2004 22 February :: 3.54 pm

jenni's card to me.
Jenni i am sorry but i have to put your card on here, it meant a lot to me and you really do listen to my problems and it basically states it...I love you soo much: Here it is::

Hey Girl,
I'm really sad to see that we havent kept in touch much at all...I miss you so much! You mean a lot to me as does your happiness on your Birthday. You are a very special person Heather, dont let anyone tell you otherwise. I dont care how much you'll disagree, You are beautiful on the outside as well as on the inside! Have a wonderful birthday! i love ya Jen*

THANKS JENNI!

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:: 2004 20 February :: 11.27 pm

Hey whats up ppl well i am here with Autum, and haveing a good time...i was so happy jenni could come over i have missed her so much! i love her and autum a lot! amanda maxwell also came over here it was a lot of fun... well ill talk to you laters thanks all who came over!

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:: 2004 19 February :: 3.44 pm

I try hard to make it. I just want to make you proud. I'm never gonna be good enough for you. I can't pretend that I'm alright and you can't change me.

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