cowboy67
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2007 6 March :: 9.56pm
did she like it? she liked it.
i should have just done the tried-and-true thing it when it happened instead of trying something novel.
where's the pennyroyal tea when you need it?
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cowboy67
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2007 5 March :: 12.15am
people think you have it so easy when they don't know you.
2 day[s] remain |
the end is here
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cowboy67
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2007 2 March :: 1.23pm
paula deen cheers me up, sometimes.
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cowboy67
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2007 28 February :: 10.13pm
far away
this ship has taken me far away
far away from the memories
of the people who care if i live or die
starlight
i will be chasing a starlight
until the end of my life
i don't know if it's worth it anymore
hold you in my arms
i just wanted to hold you in my arms
my life
you electrify my life
let's conspire to ignite
all the souls that would die just to feel alive
i'll never let you go
if you promise not to fade away
never fade away
our hopes and expectations
black holes and revelations
our hopes and expectations
black holes and revelations
hold you in my arms
i just wanted to hold you in my arms
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rina
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2007 28 February :: 9.20pm
:: Mood: busy
:: Music: beautiful never - mstu
confirmations/revelations
you don't know what you're doing here, really, or if it'll change anything. the sky above villengarde is bright, cloudless; different from how you left it. you can imagine factories smudging black against the skyline, the mirage fade-out of heat swelling over fields.
it's just green now.
the sun blazes down and you squint upwards, right hand covering your forehead as the other rests comfortably on your hip.
this is new. different.
you stare up so long that you feel like you aren't grounded, just seconds from floating up and away, away, away.
away, away, away. into the blue.
above even this you know its all just black, full of swirling gases and cosmic dust and stars waiting to die. but you still stare, almost longingly (re: desperately), and inside you know its an illusion of perfection.
(freedom hangs like heaven over everyone).
why? you ask, and you think you feel a breeze.
you try asking again, but there's no reply. the banana palms sway to themselves, casting intricate shadows on the grass below, potassium-rich and silent.
the end is here
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rina
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2007 27 February :: 3.50pm
:: Mood: contemplative
:: Music: torchwood
extreme ways to break your arm
later he'll blame it on the alcohol he hasn't been drinking and the hysteria he's never given in to and his own weakness for late twentieth-century science fiction films, which is legitimate, if illaudable.
long coats and too many guns and waking up from your own death - hell, a guy's allowed to identify, right? he's flying, he's out of his depth, he's alice down the fucking rabbit hole.
and as the air resistance becomes a painful crushing force against his ribcage he wonders, insanely, if the concrete will turn to rubber and bounce him upwards.
it doesn't.
the end is here
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rina
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2007 27 February :: 3.06am
:: Mood: pensive
i'm really sort of strange, and i think that's okay.
the end is here
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cowboy67
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2007 26 February :: 11.50pm
my life is a movie that i don't want to watch any more. i just want to hit "stop" already.
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xhan
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2007 25 February :: 10.58pm
:: Mood: cheerful
:: Music: The Chicken Payback - The Bees
obsessed? me? oh not at all.
-xhan-
the end is here
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rina
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2007 25 February :: 1.27am
:: Mood: mellow
:: Music: les jours tristes - yann tiersen
(excuses)
we are not
wild as the wind, she says,
but constricted
to the distance between
passing glances (sighs).
i am struck by the inspiration to write in the simplest of situations: walking back from the kitchen, putting on socks, brushing my teeth.
i need the complete works of edna st. vincent millay, sylvia plath, john keats, and emily dickinson.
the end is here
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cowboy67
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2007 23 February :: 2.24pm
mother, i'm tired
come surrender my son
time has ravaged on my soul
no plans to leave but still i go
falling with the leaves
falling out of sleep
to the last goodbyes
who cares why?
mother, i've tried
wasting my life
i haven't given up, i lie
to make you so proud in my eyes
falling out of sleep
crawling over me
to the last goodbyes
who cares why?
tuesday's come and gone
restless still i drive
try to leave it all behind
falling, falling out of sleep
falling, falling with the leaves
i got crawling, crawling over me
once upon a time in my life...
i went falling
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cowboy67
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2007 20 February :: 5.17pm
the past 5 months have found me repeatedly asking, "what the fuck?"
1 day[s] remain |
the end is here
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rina
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2007 19 February :: 11.20pm
:: Mood: weird
:: Music: a bit of fry and laurie
it's odd to have your name used so casually between strangers. sharing something that's just a word, but is really the whole of your being, something that describes you, is you, but simultaneously is just a way of identification.
i want to know if every other person with my name shares my traits, or my ambitions, or my strange tendencies. if we have friends with the same names, if we like the same books, wear the same clothes.
imagine if we didn't have names for things. words made up to express something we feel, even though they're mostly inadequate and they push emotions into little restrictive sentences. it's all so strange.
the end is here
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xhan
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2007 18 February :: 11.27pm
:: Mood: ecstatic
:: Music: Baba O'Reilly
zomg love this sooong. THANKS KERI! <3
| Another Soundtrack | | Opening Credits: | Legend of Zelda - System of a Down | | Average Day: | Home Entertainment System - Lazaro's dog | | With Friends: | Irish Drinking Song - Reel Big Fish | | Falling In Love: | Yellow - Cold Play | | Love Scene: | Stellar - Incubus | | Breaking Up: | Will you? - POD | | Fight Scene: | West End Riot - The Living End | | Heartbreak: | Teenager of the Year - Lo Tel | | Walk in the rain: | Baba O'Reilly - The Who | | Life's okay: | We're not gonna take it - Twisted Sister | | Partying: | I love my sex - Benny Benassi | | Flashback: | Drops of Jupiter - Train | | Mental Breakdown: | Crazy - Gnarles Barclay | | Long night alone: | Only - NIN | | Anger: | Feuer Frei - Rammstein | | Death of a loved one: | One - Metallica | | Watching a sunset: | Lemon Tree - Fools Garden | | Contentment: | 3 Libra's - A Perfect Circle | | Death Scene: | Moonlight Sonata - Beethoven | | Ending Credits: | Tale in Piano - Nobuo Uetmatsu | Take this survey | Find more surveys
Bzoink - The Original Survey Site |
-xhan-
3 day[s] remain |
the end is here
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xhan
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::
2007 18 February :: 2.46pm
:: Mood: amused
Shameless advertising! Bwee!
Get your own CrushTag!
-xhan-
the end is here
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rina
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2007 14 February :: 12.02am
:: Mood: resigned
:: Music: cotton wool - lamb
and i could stay there (make my home there)
alone, again, but it isn't a new sensation.
how everything keeps fitting together and the way things turn to dust are intriguing, at best. but i'm adopting a new policy.
how things were, or are, is no longer the point. ahead of me it feels like a gauzy fabric is wrapped around future packaging; a fog, the kind that drifts and smoothes over the long grasses of fields and leaves dew in its wake.
hopefully, about now, transpiration/condensation/evaporation is still in effect.
i'm not waiting. i'm memorizing the shape of things to come.
the end is here
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cowboy67
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2007 13 February :: 5.22pm
tori amos: blood roses
blood roses
blood roses
back on the street now
can't forget the things you never said
on days like these starts me thinking
chickens get a taste of your meat, girl
chickens get a taste of your meat, yes
you gave him your blood
and your warm little diamond
he likes killing you after you're dead
you think i'm a queer
i think you're a queer
said, i think you're a queer
i think you're a queer
i shaved every place where you been, boy
said, i shaved every place where you been, yes
god knows
i know
i've thrown away those graces
the belle of new orleans
tried to show me once
how to tango
wrapped around your feet
wrapped around like good little roses
blood roses
blood roses
back on the street now
now you've cut out the flute
from the throat of the loon
at least when you cry now
he can't even hear you
when chickens get a taste of your meat
come on, come on, come on, come on
when he sucks you deep
sometimes you're nothing but meat
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cowboy67
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2007 13 February :: 5.10pm
look, here's the deal:
we're all the same.... we all wish we had more excitement and variation in our lives but don't because we're slaves. we all want to run away and do something new and different. we all wonder what life "could" be like. blah blah blah. but routine is life. and life is routine. get used to it. it sucks. you're either deaf, blind, anorexic, depressed, bi-polar, infertile, alcoholic, overweight, disabled, schizophrenic, obsessive-compulsive, avoidant, dependent, narcissistic, a minority, poor, or someone you care about is, and it makes your life fucked up.
or if you're part of the the lucky 1% of the world, you're rich.
otherwise, you have to work every day for most of your life or you'll be assassinated for not believing in capitalism and/or starve to death. or you'll be blown up by the U.S. military.
people don't commit suicide for nothing.
the end is here
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