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2004 15 May :: 1.12 pm
:: Mood: Hating
:: Music: Nyah-MI2 soundtrack
::Making You Hate Me::
I'm letting them hate me.
3 down, 2 to go. or so I think. Maybe just one. Maybe just Her. Maybe I'll make you hate me Liana.
I'll make everyone realize who I am. I'm the person who I've always wanted to be now. I've accomplished it all. And I'm satisfied. Greatly intrigued by my evil ways. Hahahaha. O, it's amazing how I can/could make people crawl to my feet with guilt. With hate, with the truth. I LOVE how I made her scream.
Yea, I made her scream. You liked that didn't you bitch? Enough with your lies. You lie to fucking much, trying to be like me, trying to be some one you're not. Yea, well I'll tell you what, I DID see right through you Britt. I saw you, saw through those lying eyes. Now EVERYONE will know who you are. I'll ruin your disgusting life. I will. I'll let them in on your litte see-cur-et. I will.
Ah, I love being me.
1 ::Always Lonely:: |
::Find Yourself:: |
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2004 14 May :: 9.42 pm
:: Mood: Eh
::Not My Own...::
Can't believe this is happening. Hating my own self for all that I've fucked up.
I told myself I wouldn't get this way, now I'm living a lie, a lie of "alright's", and "okays".
Help me dig a hole out of the hell I've made. Why do I miss her? I told myself I wouldn't cry. And now when I see her name vanishing from everyone elses, I know exactly where she is. I know exactly where her hand is placed, where her smile is direct towards. I know, and I hate that. I wish I knew nothing. So I wouldn't have to care, or cry, or....hurt.
I'm missing something, and though I thought I was okay....I was mistaken.
I miss you. My Perfect Angel, innocence taken by that of my own.
I said I'd never cry for you, now I'd die for you.
If only you could come back, I saw you looking at me today. Yea, I know you saw me look right back.
So what was wrong? Why didn't you say "hi"? And Pretend everything was "alright"? Why didn't I smile like I used to? Instead, I hid my eyes.
Why didn't You cry?
::Find Yourself:: |
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2004 13 May :: 8.17 pm
:: Mood: Dreaming
:: Music: Colorblind-Counting Crows
::Just When You Think You're Dead::
Just when you think things couldn't get worse, there's things that lift it all away.
Old friends. Yea. They came back into my life, and thank God. Amazing how wonderful I feel now. If you wait, things will come to you.
Life lesson.
It's all I needed. Was a taste of fresh air. And I was okay again. Now, I'm okay.
::Find Yourself:: |
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