aerii
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2006 22 October :: 12.57pm
:: Mood: frustrated
:: Music: pollen and salt - daphne loves derby
some days, i just wanna give up.
i feel so stupid and pathetic and needy.
and i just want to be good enough, for him and for me.
but right now i feel like i wont ever be. and it hurts.
and thinking all of this, makes me feel more pathetic.
i just need to drop it.
i wish i could just.. not care anymore.
i wish i could just go with the flow, be cool with everything thats happening around me. but i dunno. it hard for me and i feelsldkjfdsjflsdkjf sdlfksjdflksjdfl like exploding.
arrrrrgggh i dont like this, at all.
Choke on it
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angel_bob
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2006 20 October :: 1.30pm
Schedule
The asterisks mean that it's still tentative. Scary.
Read more..
2 Survived |
Choke on it
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angel_bob
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2006 20 October :: 1.09pm
We received our flight itinerary for France.
I am no longer excited. I am just scared and anxious.
We also received our finalized schedules for school. They show when we have breaks and everything.
Here is the flight plan:
Read more..
I'll repost this as it gets closer to January. I will post our breaks and things later.
I'm scared.
I love you all.
2 Survived |
Choke on it
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aerii
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2006 20 October :: 5.59am
so i'm your latest cup of tea to keep your cold hands company.
Choke on it
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aerii
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2006 18 October :: 4.33am
:: Music: waking ashland- i am for you
i feel stupid again...
i hate it when i get in these moods...
1 Survived |
Choke on it
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angel_bob
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2006 17 October :: 11.20pm
I am seriously stressing about France. I just completed my housing form and I sound so boring. I like books. I like to read. I am nice and smart. I like writing and playing video games. I have siblings.
I wouldn't want me to live with me.
Plus Nick me manque. I don't know how I'll be able to survive France if I can't survive a day.
I love my mom and my dad, by the way. I called home really quickly earlier (forgot my phone charger, I'm stupid) to tell my mom that the new Nancy Drew game was out and the first thing she said was "what's wrong." After a brief discussion about how they popped out this game faster than a baby and faster than the last game, she said my dad wanted to talk to me. My dad said that the son of one of his friends died of a drug overdose last night and I shouldn't do drugs. I assured him I wouldn't and he told me the kid was in Kalamazoo even. I thought back to sirens last night then reassured my father once more before asking him if he would be joining me to see Sherman Alexie tomorrow.
SPEAKING OF WHICH, I am going to see Sherman Alexie tomorrow so if you're in town and want to come along, call me.
I am going to go to the doctor and get my woman parts checked out next week or so. I also am going to stop taking the pill once my prescription runs out. I've been moody for the past month or so and I think the meds are behind it.
Also, once my passport arrives, I will be going to Chicago to apply for my French visa. It is going to be a pain in the ass.
I love you all.
P.S. I am visiting Katie. She is awesome and she knows cool people. Some girl from an apartment next door made a boob holder that didn't fit her so she gave it to me. I am wearing it and it is cool beans.
1 Survived |
Choke on it
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aerii
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2006 17 October :: 6.23am
And now my heart is in your hand
So baby, understand
Choke on it
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angel_bob
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2006 15 October :: 5.45pm
Yesterday was Nick's birthday and stuff.
He's old now. A whole not-teenage-age of 20.
Choke on it
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angel_bob
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2006 13 October :: 5.08pm
Oh, I forgot to mention this.
Sherman Alexie will be speaking on Wednesday at 7 at GRCC. If I am home, I will be going. Hopefully my father will also attend so I don't have to drive.
Choke on it
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angel_bob
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2006 13 October :: 4.56pm
I should really just go home.
For the trip to France, a professor always comes along for any amount of time from a few days to a week or so. I know I haven't expressed to any of you just how stressed I was about this particular situation but I feel that now that it has been resolved, I should fill you in.
The two candidates for the journey were the only two French professors. I will not name any names because this is THE INTERNET and my life is on public display. But I really wanted one professor to take us and I really didn't want the other one.
You see, I had heard stories about this other professor. These stories included multiple accounts of this professor leaving people behind and losing both people and luggage.
I wanted the professor who took people around on a bus all over France and bought them tea at cafes in Barcelona.
Well this week we were told that we would find out who was taking us. Today in class, at the very end, almost sheepishly, we found out who it would be. Thank goodness it turned out to be the one everyone wanted. You don't know how relieved everyone was today when it was announced. There were shouts, cheers and applause. I made sure to call my mom.
In other news, today began Fall Break. On Monday or so, I will be going to see Katie. I will return on Wednesday or Thursday and will work on Friday. I have papers to write so it won't be much fun.
I love you all.
Choke on it
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