:: 2010 6 May :: 11.16 am

So, today is a new day.

It's really crazy how fast people's emotions can change.
I'm sick of feeling sorry for myself, and wanting things and not getting them. I feel bad that I put it on the internet so other people can find it and say, "wow, that girl's an effing complainer." Yeah.. if I found my journal on the internet and read it, I'd feel pretty plain stupid.

My life's not bad. At all. Certain aspects? Yes. 100% of the time? No. I hate coming off that way. I like my life, I just need to step it up, get out of my shell. I'm starting to make a list in my head to see what it is exactly that I need.I'm thinking my number one is more friends.. but the fact that I've been feeling pretty antisocial lately isn't helping. See, I do want these things in my life, I just never think I have the time when I do.
I like feeling safe, having a handful of friends. But I'm beginning to see that I never got the experiences most people at 19 have had. I'm not like everyone else my age, but I'm honestly trying to make it work. Well, some of the time.
Geesh, I make no sense.

So, I'm sitting here in Baker's parking lot on Shane's computer (hoping the battery doesn't take a crap) - waiting for him to get out of his class. It's only been like.. 30 minutes. ugh. We're going to the mall after.. probably going to eat some nasty mall-food that I love, and shop a little bit (Are there any guys that like to shop out there? cause I'd love to meet them!) After the mall, we're stopping by to see my brother for an hour or so. I haven't seen him in a couple weeks. In fact, I don't think anyone has. So, it's a little overdue, but I think he'll be happy to see Shane since he got approved to see him.

Also, does anyone seem to know any diet tricks? I'm trying to lose 10 pounds and it's definitely not working. I hate exercising, so that could be why. I do have my gym membership, I just have to get in the habit. It just sucks 'cause I hate all the food that could help me. Basically, I kill hunger with bread and cereal.. and chicken. Yeah, what a way for me to lose weight. Way to go me!

Wellll, that's all that's floating in my brain at the moment. I could sit here for hours and type meaningless junk, but I'm getting just as bored as everyone else.

Until next time..

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