xxinterrupted
|
::
2005 17 February :: 10.00pm
:: Mood: confused
So I haven't written in a few days.. nothing has really been going on. I've been taking PSSAs, I went to school late yesterday, and the whole "Secret Room" at Bentworth.. I'm failing Geometery, Accounting and who knows what else. Do I care? No. I'm looking into cyber school, my mom called and we're waiting for the lady to call me back. Jesus, I'd wish she'd call back already. Well, I can't do anything but wait.
We get a half day tomorrow because of Act 80 day or whatever, I'm not really sure- nor do I care. As long as we get off. We also have Monday off, which is awesome. Except for the fact that I have to watch my sisters, so I can't really do anything.
Tomorrow when I get home from school around noon my cousin Bridg is taking me to Wal*Mart, to get some things for Gab.. then after that I'm coming home watching my sisters then I have I'm going with my Aunt Loraine and Gram to the mall, then if I can get a ride I'm going to Amys birthday party.. weeeee. She called me tonight and wanted to know if she wanted her to pick me up- but she couldn't because I had to watch my sisters 'til six, but I dunno she got mad because I was coming to her party late. *sorry, not my fault Aim* So I need to find a ride. Becky isn't coming, the thing for her Gram is tomorrow. *hugs* love you babe!
Out of everyone in my school that's had a baby, I'm the only one that's had a girl. Hmmm, cool. *random*
I dunno, I came home and crashed today. I get so tired I can't even help it- school takes everything out of me and I don't have anything left when I get home. So I feel terrible that I don't spend time with Gabrielle. There just isn't enough time in the day to do what I want.. I feel like I'm not a good mother because of it. I don't know, I'm just insecure about some things I guess.
Jim and I are going to see the school play on Feb. 25. **Jims 20th birthday!** Just thought I should inform everyone.
Well, this was another useless entry. I'm calling Jim and heading to bed- night.
1 freebird |
Fly high...
|
|
lilkristen
|
::
2005 17 February :: 9.17pm
i TALKED TO JOEY TONiGHT =]
2 freebirds |
Fly high...
|
|
xxinterrupted
|
::
2005 15 February :: 7.50pm
:: Mood: moody
complete this sentance:
i am not: pretty.
i hurt: myself, and others.
i love: my daughter.
i hate: you.
i hope: everything turns out okay.
i hear: everything you don't.
i crave: to be loved.
i regret: everything I've done wrong.
i cry: a lot.
i care: about gabrielle and jim.
i always: act bitchy.
i long to: leave home.
i feel alone: all the time.
i listen: to idiots in school.
i hide: myself from you.
i drive: nothing.
i sing: alone.
i dance: at weddings.
i write: in my journal.
i breathe: in air.
i play: games on the internet.
i miss: being young.
i search: for myself.
i learn: something new everyday.
i feel: scared.
i know: things will be okay.
i say: whatevers on my mind.
i succeed: in nothing.
i fail: in everything.
i dream: of beautiful things.
i sleep: restlessly.
i wonder: about how things will be later in life.
i want: to loose weight.
i worry: about Gabrielle.
i have: a lot.
i give: all of myself for Gabrielle.
i fight: for things that I believe in.
i wait: for you to grow up.
i need: love.
i am: a bitch.
i think: about giving up.
i can't help the fact that: I am the way I am.
i stay: because I can't leave.
1 freebird |
Fly high...
|
|
xxinterrupted
|
::
2005 14 February :: 9.48pm
:: Mood: naughty
So today school was gay, I'm failing like everything, I'm behind ect. I wore my Valentine PJs, no makeup, and my hair in a pony tail. Hell yes, I love that look. The "I don't give a shit" look. Definitely.
Anyways, I came home to find out that Beckys Gram died. *hugs* I love you babe, if you need anything call me. I'll be there.
I wasn't in all that great of a mood when I woke up either. It's been a year today since my Pap died. Why is everyone that we love taken from us.. and on Valentines day. The day of "love". How can we think of love when you think of the person you loved being taken away from you.
My mom isn't doing well. She can't even get out of bed. I really think she needs to go to the hospital- but she's like "I don't want to pay the bills for it. We can't afford it." But it's kinda just like.. well yeah we might not be able to afford it, but I'd like my Mom to be there when I get married, have more kids.. and just grow up. But no one listens to me- so I don't know.
Jim and I went out today.. it was nice to just actually GO OUT. We went out to eat, to Pizza Hut [my choice.. I wanted it so bad.] And then we went to the mall. He bought me some gum, a purse [SCORE!] and a book. I got home at like 9:45.
"How old do you want me to be?" lol, Jim I didn't mean it that way. <3333
2 freebirds |
Fly high...
|
|
lilkristen
|
::
2005 14 February :: 6.48pm
ONEE GOOD THiNG ABOUT TODAY.. CASSiEEEE CAMEEEE BACKKKKKKK =]
Fly high...
|
|
lilkristen
|
::
2005 14 February :: 6.21pm
HAPPY VALENTiNES DAY TO YOU.. HOPE YOURS WAS BETTER THAN MiNE.. WOW DO i MiSS HiM... AND i DiDNT EVEN REALiZE iT... SHOULD i CALL HiM?? OR WOULD iT BE WEiRD TO CALL ON VALENTiNES DAY.. NAHH iM NOT GOiNG TO.. iTS DURiNG THE WEEK.. HES BUSY iM SURE.. i TOLD MYSELF iD WAiT TiLL HE CALLED ME.. BUT THAT HASNT HAPPENED iN AWHiLE.. i'LL CALL HiM ON HiS BiRTHDAY i GUESS.. BUT THAT iSNT FOR AWHiLE STiLL..
BUT i LOOK FORWARD TO THAT DAY..
3 freebirds |
Fly high...
|
|
xxinterrupted
|
::
2005 13 February :: 6.32pm
:: Mood: moody
So my Mom came home - [I still don't know where she was.. I haven't talked to her.] and passed out on the bed. Everyone came down, my Aunt Loraine and Uncle Don gave her a blood sugar test, everythings okay. They made her eat something- and made her go to bed. She can't stand up. They think she is just so tired that she can't go anymore. So she's still sleeping.
Maybe if someone would get a real job, then she wouldn't have to be working from 10 in the morning until 2-3 in the morning. Yeah.. whatever, no one listens to what I say.. It's not like I matter.
7 freebirds |
Fly high...
|
|
xxinterrupted
|
::
2005 13 February :: 12.58pm
:: Mood: bitchy
:: Music: Jimmy Eat World - Pain
So yesterday I didn't even write.. whoa.
Becky came over yesterday. We just chilled, watched some DVDs decorated our planners, made fun of each other.. haha. Definitely. Becky, I like YOUR sleeves.
Today I dunno, I woke up around 8:00 Gabrielle woke me up to eat. So I fed her and went back to sleep.. I was so freakin' tired. I don't know how Becky gets up at like 7:30 and stays up. That's like crazy. Anyways- I woke up about 9:30.. Becky left at like 11:00. She's dumb. :)
My sister Samantha came home at around 11:00 too, and she knocked on my Moms bedroom door and no one answered so she opened the door and just George was in the bed sleeping- uh okay? Where's my mom.. we can't find her. We've looked through the whole house, called people, and called the bar. She's not answering her cell phone. Okay.. no one knows where she is. So I'll update about that later.. I hope she's okay.
A little thing that has been bothering me- why do people put their numbers in their info!? I do not understand, do they WANT people to come stalk and kill them? Is it just me, or does anyone else think that's retarded?? I mean, yeah it's fine to put your number in your away message, but not with the area code. I swear, people are stupid anymore. But whatever floats their boats.
Today Jim is supposed to come over.. weeee- I hope he does. :-D
Tomorrow is Valentines day. Mmmmmmm. Y
On another note- I hate my hair. That's all.
4 freebirds |
Fly high...
|
|
lilkristen
|
::
2005 13 February :: 11.23am
:: Mood: TiREDDDDDDDD
:: Music: MR. BRiGHTSiDE.. THE KiLLERS
WOW WUT A WEEKEND... i DiD ABSOLUTELY NOTHiNG!!! OMGGGG iM DYiNG OVER HEREE.. FRiDAY i HAD TO BABYSiT SO i COULDNT GO OUT, YESTERDAY OMGGG EVERYONE HAD SOMETHiNG TO DO BUT ME AND KRiSTiN AND MY DAD WOULDNT DRiVE ME TO SHEEPSHEAD TO SEE HER SO i WAS LiKE OOOHH POOP.. JULiA WAS SiCKK.. KAiT HAD TO GO TO STATEN iSLAND.. ALi HAD TO GO TO A SWEET SiXTEEN FOR SOMEONE SHE DOESNT EVEN KNOW.. DEiRDRE.. WE JUST KEPT GETTiNG EACH OTHER AT THE WRONG TiMES.. ERiN HAD TO GO SEE HER SiSTER, ALEXA HAD TO WATCH TAYLOR, i WAS LiKE WTF SO ME AND KRiSTiN STAYED ONLiNE AND TALKED TO EACH OTHER ALL DAY.. TODAY i ACTUALLY HAVE SOMETHiNG TO DO! WOOP WOOP! iM GOiNG TO MATT'S BASKETBALL GAME, i KNOW, WHY WOULD i DO THAT BUT MATT'S PLAYiNGG MiCHELLE'S BROTHER SO i THiNK SHES GUNNA BE THERE.. (iF SHE REMEMBERS TO COME, AND SHE BETTER.. iF SHE DOESNT i'LL CALL ALEXA SiNCE SHES AROUND THE CORNER LOL) BUT YEAA AND THEN WE'RE GOiNG TO MJ'S FOR DiNNER TO MEET THE NEW NEiGHBORS.. i NEED TO TAKE A SHOWER NOW CUZ MY HAiR HAS TO BE DRY BY THE TiME WE LEAVE FOR MATT'S GAME AT ONEE.. i GUESS i'LL STRAiGHTEN iT.. iTS TOO COLD TO LET iT DRY AND SCRUNCH iT..
iM OUT LiKE A TROUT WiTH A POUT iN A DROUGHT.. =]~
Fly high...
|
yadiffy04
|
::
2005 12 February :: 1.05pm
:: Mood: loved
:: Music: Bulavard of Broken Dreams- Green Day
Whoa, its been a long time sence Ive updated. So....Me and Grace are still at it, and I couldnt be any happier with her(Im sorry about your finger, I didnt mean to hurt it..:'( ) so, I just got back from disneyland, and THAT was krazy. Well, Ill start at the beginning. In the morning, Mrs Bacon was being a bitch, and took away our cd player, and speakers, so we couldnt have music, but Raul jacked them from her so she got even more pissed. Then we got to go backstage of Disneyland, andgot changed, got our picture taken, and got in formation. Then we played follow the leader for a mile to get to the park door. We marched down through Fantisy land, down Main street, and around the corner, out of the park, so that was fun, Mr Silva said the ban was the best hes seen in 5 years, but the colorgaurd was the worst hes EVER seen in any school. But thats ok, cause there all a bunch of drama bitches. So, then we were at disneyland, and it was ok, I mean, I was a good place for me and grace to hang out. We saw my mom right after Pirates of the Carribean, and said hi and bye, so then she went home. Then as we were on our way to the Haunted Mansion, Graces parents saw me with her, and yelled at her, yet they dont know were going out. hahahaha. So then we went on the haunted mansion like 4 times that day. and Brenna said she liked Morgan, and we all knew that Morgan still liked her, so we were asking him questions about her. Then we went to the hotel, and RC asked out Brenna for Morgan, and she said yes, so there a new couple in our band, and thats good. So then we watched the Led Zeppelin concert on my PS2, and stayed up till like 1:30. Raul was way too effing horney, he was jacking off in the bathroom, and were all just like, OK, I want to leave, but we couldnt because the door was already taped. Then he came out of the bathroom with a frikin cup full of you know what, it was nasty as HELL!!!! So we told him to get rid of it, and he puts it in the cupboard! can you say RETARD! So then we just hung out, and raul was being raul. So we finally got to sleep at 3, and woke up at 6. Then waited aroud for a while. Then it started pouring, and so we had to do to Disneyland AGAIN, not California Adv. because Disneyland is mostly inside, so my group got absoultly soaked, and spent 4 hours inside the locker room, and we had more fun than if we were outside. and It was cool because we got to talk to Mr Boyer for like2 hours straight, and yah, it was cool. So, thats my weekend so far. Ill ttyl. l8
Stevo
COMMENT PEOPLE!!!
" Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
P.S. Its gonna be 2 months for me and Grace on valentines day!!
3 freebirds |
Fly high...
|
|
xxinterrupted
|
::
2005 11 February :: 11.28am
:: Mood: scared
soooo scared..
OMG, I'M GOING TO GET MY HAIR CUT.. OKAY. OMG, WHOA. I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M GOING TO DO IT.. I'M SO SCARED. THE HAIR CUT I WANT IS KINDA SHORT FOR ME.. OMG! WHAT IF I DON'T LIKE IT!?!?!???!! whoaaaaaaa, I'm like freaking out!
Here is my "before" picture:
Read more..
My "after" picture:
Read more..
No, I don't want to talk about it.
I hate it. It's not what I wanted.
4 freebirds |
Fly high...
|
|
lilkristen
|
::
2005 10 February :: 8.15pm
ME AND KAiT MADEE A CLUB!! iTS JUST US iN iT!!! iTS CALLEDD TPMATBF LOLOL DONTT ASKK BUT JUST SO YOUU KNOW iTS THE COOLEST CLUB EVERRRR! LOVEE YOUUU KAiT #1NEE SOPHH<3
Fly high...
|
|
lilkristen
|
::
2005 10 February :: 7.07pm
MYY DEAR KAiT HAD SOMETHiNG iN HER PROFiLE THAT WAS JUST SOOO TRUEE.. "WHYY TRY TO FiX A FRiENDSHiP THAT CANT BE FiXED? ESPECiALLY WHEN THE ONLY ONE TRYiNG iS YOURSELF."
i CANT WAiT UNTiL CHRiSSY AND LAURENN COME OVERRRR!!! WE'RE GUNNAA GO OUT AND PARRRR-TAY LOL.. ME AND DEiRDRE ARE GUNNAA HAVE A STREET PARTY THiS WEEKEND!! YiPPEEE!!! HAHAAA WE CANT FiND A HOUSEE TO HAVE A PARTY iN SO WE'RE JUST GUNNA HAVE A PARTY AND DRiNK ON THE STREETS LMAOO.. MY CONVO WiTH KAiT:
kAiTt<3 [7:11 P.M.]: who is ur profile about?
kRiSs [7:11 P.M.]: this kid from the summer..
kAiTt [7:11 P.M.]: aww
kAiTt [7:11 P.M.]: wat happenedd
kRiSs [7:11 P.M.]: HES AN ASSSSSS
kRiSs [7:11 P.M.]: lol
kAiTt[7:11 P.M.]: lol<33
kRiSs [7:11 P.M.]: that about sums it up =]
HAHAAA iM TELLiNG HER MY STORY NOW LOL.. HAHAA LiKE NOO ONE KNOWS THE STORY.. CASSiEE KNOWS TOO.. BUT THATS ABOUT iT.. OMGG CASSiE'S REALLY SiCKKKK! SHE HASNT BEEN iN SCHOOL FOR WEEKS SHES GOT LiKE CHRONiC TENSiON HEADACHES OR SOMETHiNG AND i FEEL SOO BAD CUZ SHES HAD TO HAVE ALL THESE TESTS DONEE AND i MiSS HER SOO MUCHH<3 i MiGHT CALL HER TONiGHT.. OMGGGG CHRiSTiNES FATHER DiED LAST NiGHT.. HE HAD A HEART ATTACK REALLY SUDDENLY.. LiKE HE WAS HEALTHY AND EVERYTHiNG BUT HE HAD A FATAL HEART ATTACK AND i FEEL SOO BADDDD.. BRi iS HELPiNG TO GET STUFF TOGETHER TO SEND OVER TO HER CUZ SHE REALLY FEELS FOR HER.. BRi'S LOST A PARENT TOO =[ OMGG THE ANNiVERSARY'S COMiNG UP.. =[ =[ =[ i FEEL BADD<3 ALRiGHT iM GUNNA GO AND TALK TO KAiT AND JULiA AND CHRiSSY AND THEN iM GUNNA TAKE A SHOWER AND CALL CASSiEE SOOOOO YEAA iM OUT FOR NOWW.. LATER<3
Fly high...
|
|
xxinterrupted
|
::
2005 10 February :: 12.41pm
:: Mood: apathetic
A little bit about Jena.
I love to eat tuna. It's my obsession- with crackers I'd die for it.
I have a daughter Gabrielle, and a boyfriend of 2 years Jim. I love them both very much.
If there was one thing I could change about me, it'd be making myself more likeable- because I can definitely be a bitch sometimes.
I love doritos.. any kind.
I hate warm cheese.
I don't like girls. Basicly because they're backstabbing little whores who try to take your boyfriend- but I do have a few girl friends that I adore and would do anything for. I love them a lot.
I love quotes, cards, and anything that holds a memory. That's why my room looks like a garbage can- I keep everything that anyone gives me.
I'm a perfectionist with some things, like my journal/info/planner [from school]/anything that I make. I don't know why. It has to look perfect before I'm happy. If it doesn't look perfect then I re-do it.
I like to change the look of things a lot, that's why I always change the look of my journal, and decorate all of my belongings.
If I don't like you, I don't like you.
I am definitly a bitch, and yes I'll say something to you if I don't like what you're saying/doing. I'm not scared of saying what's on my mind.
I miss a lot of school. I don't like school.
I love glitter, glue, markers, crayons, paint, all that kinda stuff. I love decorating things to.
OREO ice cream is my favorite.
I love snickers, snickers crunch, and Extra Polar Ice gum.
If you have something to say to me, say it to my face. Don't write it in your journal- don't say it to a friend. Say it to me. Nothing pisses me off more than that. kthanks!
If I'm upset about something in my life, I tend to write a lot in my journal. Don't mind that- it's just something I do.. just ignore me.
I love pictures, I love stationary.. I love quotes on stationary with pictures on it.
I keep all my birthday cards/valentines day cards/any cards anyone gives me. Why? Dunno. It's something I do.
I collect buttons. I love them. I have tons. If you have any you want to add- just hand 'em over. I'll accept!
Yes, I do sleep with a stuffed animal. Mr. Floppers is his name, Jim bought him for me when we went on vacation together.
I have a thing with purses. I love them. I can't get enough of them. I change purses at least every few weeks.
I used to collect stickers, until my sister stole all of my stickers and I don't know what she did with them.. so I no longer do that. But I still have lots of NEW stickers. But I no longer collect them.. I still can't believe she took them. I'm still upset.
I used to have one of the largest braclet collections. Again, until my sister took most of them. *sigh* I no longer wear lots of braclets.
I collect tops of beer bottles/wine coolers/mikes/zima ect. bottles. I'm currently making something out of them so again- I'll accept any that anyone gives me!
I listen to all kinds of music, not just 'one type'.
I love orange juice.
It takes me a long time to write an entry, I don't really know why.. I think because I take my time. I do type fast; but I just will type something and then walk away for a bit or I'll type something and then go on a different site to look for something.. I get side tracked easily.
I love the word definitely.
My favorite movie is Moulin Rouge.
I don't have a lot of friends because I choose not to.
I don't write in this diary for other people, I do it for myself. And yes, this goes out to anyone who thinks I'm trying to make my life seem "harder" than everyone elses. You can say whatever you want to say about my journal- It's mine. If you don't like what I have to say;; don't read it. It's that simple.
I don't like smoking cigaretts, and in fact I hate them. I hate the fact that just becase someone else smokes, you have to pay for it to. No, I don't allow people to smoke around Gabrielle- at all. Go ruin your own life, not ours.
No, I really don't like people younger than me. I think they're very immature and need to grow up. Yes, I was like them at one time. But I grew up, and sorry maybe I do set my standards a little high.. but act your age.
I something's cool- I'll tell you. If something's not cool- I'll tell you.
Yes, I've smoked weed. Yes, I've done it multipul times. No, I don't do it anymore. I've grown up- I have a daughter and I take responsibility for her. I'm not going to put her in danger just to get high and "feel good".
I think underage drinking is fine- to an extent. Don't go get so trashed that you don't know what you're doing.. but I think it's acceptable to have a few beer/Mikes/Zima/whatever you prefer.
I love candles.
Driving is fun. Though I think I suck.
I've been in an AIR PLANE. WHOAAAAAAAa.
I've had sex. [obviously.]
I can't spell worth shit.
My Dad died when I was 6 months old from a brain tumor that they can now get rid of with the new surgery that came out about 5 years after he died.
I'm scared of getting stuck in an elevator- and I'm terrified of when I get in an elevator that the cables will snap and we'll go falling down and die.
When I'm on the highway I have to close my eyes when we're in the left lane.. when the wall barrior is on the left of the car and a big tractor trailor is on the right. I'm scared of the tractor trailor coming over and smashing us against the barrior.
I like stars.
I enjoy comments on my journal- that means everyone who reads my journal that doesn't have a journal on woohu.com. You can leave a comment to. All you have to do is click on "ok" and then click the little box that says "Anonymous". And then type something in the little text box. KGREAT. Now that I've taught everyone how to leave one, I should get some.
Well, I think that's enough today.. Yes I'm bored, tired, sick, in pain, and wanting to take a nap. Which I really should do because Gabrielle is sleeping. But I think I'll go wash some clothes then get a shower. Blah. I want to drive somewhere.
---****The doctor just called and was like "Is Ms. Pust there?" I was like "This is her" Well he said that the doctors were looking at the x-ray they took of my chest and that I have a slight case of phenomia [sp?] but that the new meds I'm on will take care of it, but to be patient- it'll take a little while. NO. I WANT TO BE BETTER NOW! That's what I wanted to scream, but I just said "Alright, thank you doctor." and we hung up. Will the sickness ever fucking end?!
7 freebirds |
Fly high...
|
|
xxinterrupted
|
::
2005 10 February :: 9.15am
:: Mood: contemplative
If you never read anything in my journal, click these links and read. kthanks.
Think about smoking cigarettes?
Weed.
Fly high...
|
|
