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imnotokay

:: 2007 30 May :: 2.13am
:: Mood: WHOA!
:: Music: Lilliz-"What I Like About You"

It's a Crazy/Psycho/Messed up/shitty kind of Night!
whoa as if i never give you guys a good update, here's one! Tonight samantha tells me she likes me, mistake no.1, i told her i like her too. Tonight my recent x-girlfriend a.k.a Alicia/Best Friend found out somehow.....i wonder who!!!!! Well she decided she could flip on me and say i'm a liar/all the above. BUT! She broke up with me because it was awkward, and she wasn't feeling right about the relationship. Well if she didn;t want the relationship, then why now does she decide to flip so crazily because someone likes me, and my feelings are surfacing for her again too. Then again, when we were dting i told her my feleings for sam were gone. I think i really ended up hurting he and i fell terribl, but she never gave me time of day to explain myslef, she jsut signed off and never let me reply. I feel like the biggest loser in the world right now, besides bush, but still. I have these two wonderful girls, wonderful in my eyes, not so much in some of my friends. I mean with samantha, i can talk about anythign to, we can last a conversation for days on end, and she has the best way to make me laugh, and keep me happy...Then alicia, she knows how to cheer me up, was always there for me, and now decides she likes me, she's got this way of making you fall fast for her(trust me, i know!!!). I'm stuck here in between two ppl and i know in the end, i'm going to have to choose wisely, but after all, when do i ever choose wisely. I mean look at my past, it doesn;t show bright colors of a great relationship, the best relationship i've ever had was with jessica durstine, and that was the 5th grade. All i want is love in my life, is that so hard to ask for? I don;t want to be hurt anymore, and both of them have done that. I just wnat them both to change and decide on if they really want me or not. Trust me, maybe i'm not the guy you want at all, not even a little bit, not even at all. I hope that my decision becomes easier than it seems right now, and i could use all the help i can get, so please, don't hesitate to tell em what you think....plz tell me what you think! I love you all, goodnight =]

-[//andy//]

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