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| spinoangel (profile) wrote, on 1-12-2004 at 4:02pm | |
| Current mood: still hurting Music: watching tv... |
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| yeah it still hurts. so i did nothing today. just trying to live with the pain. here's my turn to bitch about it, so if you wanna read... go ahead. if not, then i suggest you just go to someone else's journal... it was the worst in the middle of the night. i woke up and tears were running down my face and my eyes (yes both of them) were seriously burning. this was like 2:30 in the morning. so i was forced to get up and wash my face and put some more medicine in my eye. sigh... i feel so freaking bad. like just this eye is killing me. if i didnt have it, i'd be feeling GREAT. but nooooo... the first weekend i get after xmas vacation, i'm burdened with this crap. i want to literally scratch my eyes out to stop the pain. i can't really read without straining my eyes. i was trying to read the music while playing guitar and then the stream of tears started again. it frustrated me so bad. i'm like handicapped and it's so not cool. soooooooo not cool. i don't want anyone to see me like this, it'll probably just make me cry even more, but i have to go to school tomorrow. i feel like a fucking freak. i dont wanna go out of the house. i dont wanna even get out of bed. but i've been doing homework. trying to at least... without crying. sigh... i think i'm done. edit i don't think i'm done. sniff. i cried at the dinner table. i've never done that. i feel so helpless. and it only makes me cry more. i feel so pathetic. and i'm irritable towards my parents. my mom was like "you don't have to answer me like that. what's wrong with you?". that made me cry more... so much crying. i've never done it so much in my whole life. but i think my parents might let me stay home tomorrow. i'm watching moulin rouge even though i have it. *suddenly the world seems such a perfect place. suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace. suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste. it all revolves around you.* sigh... i miss people... i miss being in the real world. all i have is this blurred yucky feeling. blecch. feeling the tears fall down my face... |
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christini | 01-12-04 5:29pm :-/
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karit_top | 01-12-04 7:37pm i love you, and will forever. im here for you. and dont forget, i miss you in art. |
angeleyes | 01-12-04 9:33pm awww, we missed u today.
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laughkisscry | 01-12-04 9:53pm feel better!!!
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