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| musicalbabe (profile) wrote, on 3-18-2004 at 4:27pm | |
| Current mood: content Music: that Russian Ave Maria Subject: The most important man in my life is... |
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| ...but first, a more important thing. if i were that kind of person, i would physically maul whoever beat up *this person who i'll not mention by name, in case it's not something that should be written about in an online journal*. how could anyone hurt such a cool person? i mean, i haven't really ever publically said it, but i have A LOT of respect for him. he is incredibly intelligent, and shows wisdom beyond his years. as i've been saying all day, this makes me SO mad. ugh. it just angers me beyond total comprehension. what i mean is, I'm so confused as to why anyone would have such evil intensions, and i'm angry because of that individuals' skewed mindset. i mean, really, why would anyone hurt him? he's such a great guy! grr! well, moving on. i have a date to sadies! yay! strictly friends-only, but i wasn't looking for anything more anyway. yay! i'm really glad i don't have to worry about asking someone else or just going stag...it's not like i had a long list of guys to choose from! (no, really...i can't think of that many guys i'd want to go with...) oh, and i got my forrests catalogue today. (forrests is like THE double reed instrument store from heaven located in berkeley.) just try to make it WORSE that i don't play oboe anymore, why dontcha? gahh! my life has become incomplete without double reeds! maybe i should buy some...:-/ haha. that'd be stupid, but it might make me feel better. oh, and i DO feel ever so much better about the current thing. it's done, and i feel like sighing a hundred sighs of relief that it's over (well, technically, it's just begun, but whatever) and that it went okay. hey! it's my music stand! okay, sorry, being random. ooo reed cases....pretty..ahhh i want them! someone please convince me to drop something and take band again, please! ahhh! okay, now onto the entry. so any guesses as to who the most "important" (also the most influential, domineering, and controlling) man in my life is? well, surprisingly, it's NOT any guy that i have ever had a crush on. and there's quite a few of those, ha. it's not my father, and it's not brian. it's not my pastor, but someone related to church as well as school. well that gave it away. the most important man in my life (right now) is Mr. Shaull. when did i realize this? well, it's not like it was a sudden epiphany. i'd predicted that this realization would occur as soon as i entered high school, and i'd known it since...well, since i'd decided that i wanted to be in main street. it's just become very apparent recently. i could probably write a whole book about mr. shaull, his teaching methods, and my opinions about them, but i won't. i think i'll keep it short. i'm starting to get a headache, anyway, and people have already started IMing me about their problems. the one thing about talking to mrs. prothro and getting along with her is that i could really see myself in her position. i've already found that people just naturally want to talk to me and trust me easily. and i'm not saying that anyone has any reason not to trust me, becuase i consider myself a very trustworthy, honest, open, and considerate person, but it's not like i pry personal information out of people. they come to me. so its just sort of like looking into my future. i've considered being a high school councilor for some time now, as well as a career in music therapy, but yeah. that was kind of neat. but ANYWAY, i've digressed. you can always tell who mr. shaull favors by how long and how hard he works with them in front of the class. the ones that he pushes almost to tears, and frequently, are his favorites. he chooses them 1) because of their willingness to learn, drive to succeed and 2) because he thinks that he can really get a beautiful sound out of them if he works hard enough. i definitely have enough of the former. the latter, i've never been too sure about, but then again, one can never know, i guess. it's not like we can see into our vocal future. lol. but i guess the first factor, as well as my ability to stay calm in front of the entire class, makes me a target student. so we're having one of those days where mr. shaull asks for volunteers and consequently calls on people (becuase no one wants to do it to themselves!) to sing in front of the class. it was near the end of the period, and he'd already worked with tiffany, michella, rachel, emily, and nicole. tiffany got lots of time and a whole slew of brutal comments from mr. shaull. i mean, she's in G21 so obviously she's good, plus she worked with him after school yesterday. she's one of the ones that you would automatically hear her name called and assume 'this is going to be a long, hard, vocal struggle.' i mean, of course it'll yield results, mr. shaull never fails in improving his students' voices, but it's never easy, and he usually succeeds in hurting feelings and pride, and causes great frustration. but anyway, he spends a lot of time with her. he spends minimal amounts of time with basically everyone else, even less for some. (which, to me, i think, is definitely not cool. i mean, its sort of saying that he doesn't really care.) but anyway, there's like 7 minutes left of class when he asks (forces) me to go up and sing. i had a feeling that he was getting pretty darn frustrated with people who were out of tune, missing entrances, not breathing, and not thinking. i sort of felt like he was just using me to cool off a bit becuase he never has to yell at me for tuning or rhythm mistakes. so i sing. sort of crappy, but GEEZ, we're singing italian art songs out of the SOPRANO book, and i've NEVER, EVER considered myself a soprano...EVER. have i made that clear? okay then. and i think i've mentioned it before, but i have a really strange break in my head voice, around a D, where i move into sort of a falsetto-ish tonality, with no body, that's in the back of my head and really weak. this has ALWAYS pissed me off. i mean, other people just carry their head voices right on up to high C and beyond. and it's just freaking annoying!! i've learned to deal with my chest/head break pretty darn well, but this one annoys me to no end. so he's trying to get me to not think about it and 'just do it'. 'it' being just sing with lots of body and lots of sound, and not think about making the pitch the weird way that i do up there. now, of course, i would love to work on this more, but i seriously do at like EVERY one of my voice lessons, and i'd like to keep my head and chest voice consistent, i mean, it sounds BETTER, for heaven's sake, and i can control it, so why not work with me where MY voice is agreeable? but noooooo. we have to work on my screwy, cracky, fucked up range. GAHHH!! (and i'm already mad at him for choosing such high songs ANYWAY when my range doesn't revolve around high F's!!) so anyway, i'm not getting much better, seeing as i've already convinced myself that i CAN'T FREAKING KEEP MY HEAD VOICE ON A G BECUASE I'LL FREAKING CRACK ON A D!! and mr. shaull is trying to unconvince me of that. which i'm seriously willing to convince myself of, becuase i wholeheartedly trust that he knows what i can potentially do, it's just that it WON'T HAPPEN over the course of, well, about 15 minutes. probably less than 15 minutes, but certainly longer then 7 (when the period ended) was how long he worked with me. i would have been fine knowing that i'd been publically embarassed in front of the class (becuase strangely, i'm okay with that) but when he kept me into LUNCH, on a day when it was G21 at lunch, that PISSED ME OFF. here i am struggling vocally AFTER THE BELL RANG, and all of the people that i really admire are coming into the classroom, listening to me sound like shit. my class of people in girls' ensemble is one thing, but in front of the best girls in the entire school?? i mean, it's girls 21, for God's sake! i swear, he spent at least 5 minutes of his time that SHOULD have been spent warming girls 21 up yelling at ME. oh, the horrors and wonders of mr. shaull. i should be flattered, but i'm angry. grumblegrumble. okay, i think i'm done now. i hope you were thoroughly entertained (this is where you yawn) at my lovely escapades with mr. shaull, most of which cause me to seriously disagree with his brutal and insensitive teaching methods. it's funny, after the whole thing, i was thinking: maybe it'll be nice to have a break from mr. shaull yelling at us every day. how could i think that? ahhh! that's not cool! oh well. i'll just keep working. that's all i can do. |
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KirbyDee | 03-18-04 11:14pm Skimmed it so sorry, using my bro's comp so I can be kicked off at any given time... Like... relatively soon... grrr... Anyway! Congratz on the saides escort (as I like to call them ;) ) and I know! Mr. Shaull is OBVIOUSLY training you for something.. .hm... what? ;) Lol, anyway yeah he works with you like 3X as much as everyone else when he calls them up. Lol, Shaull hog! jk! kicked off, toodlez |
musicalbabe | Re:, 03-19-04 12:25am haha, no worries about the accidental 7x of one reply. lol!! (and sheesh, de, haven't you learned to not use darin's comp? last time he practically killed you!! but hey, i don't blame you, i bet his comp is pretty tight.)
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iwish2bemilkywhite | Re: Re:, 03-19-04 12:37am dear lord. who needs novels when you have melissa's blog. ha. i love you mel. |
musicalbabe | Re: Re: Re:, 03-19-04 12:43am haha totally!! and i thought i'd given up on my 2nd grade dream of being a sucessful author. i mean, i don't even KNOW who reads all of this stuff!! well i'm glad it's entertaining. i love you too, of course. *mwah*
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KirbyDee | Re: Re:, 03-19-04 1:58am First of, you do not give off the impression that you are easy. Men just think with their testis as opposed to their brain.
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musicalbabe | Re: Re: Re:, 03-20-04 3:07pm awww...thanks! men and their...anatomy...sheesh. lol!! and you SHOULD raise your hand!! he doesn't make you sing intervals when you're up there, just stay in tune! you can do that better than some people...*coughtorycough* and who cares about the interval thing? i betcha 75% of the class couldn't find an octave on their first try, anyway, he just happened to ask you and not them. (which you should take as a compliment.) anyway, thanks about the writing. maybe i'll pick it up as a hobby again if i'm bored. i think i do enough writing in my journal, though...haha. |
PrimaJazzerina | 03-20-04 12:47am I have 2 things to say...
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musicalbabe | Re:, 03-20-04 3:04pm and i have 2 replies! ;-)
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Anonymous | hey mel!, 03-20-04 3:33pm hey melissa this is alison!! thank u sooo much for seein the show!! i kno i've said this already but u guys rock!! haha anyway...sounds like mr. shaull realllly wants u to improve and be an even better singer! i kno how it feels tho wen u had to sing in front of everyone...and i think thats kinda dumb that like u arent singing in ur range! u dont wanna hurt ur voice! well anyway, cya at skool!!
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musicalbabe | Re: hey mel!, 03-20-04 7:02pm oh my gosh it was so much fun! and you're the REAL star, i mean WOW YOU'RE GOOD!! great, great performance last night! and yeah, idk about mr. shaull, but it's not like it's OUT of my range, it's just that i'm waayy more comfortable singing lower. but hey, it makes sense to work on my weaker range, so whatever. but have fun tonight!! break a leg!! have the best darn closing show ever!!! (haha i still keep humming 'shy' and 'yesterday i loved you'...those songs are great!) so anyway, break a leg, princess winnifred! GO ALISON!! we love you! |