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spinoangel (profile) wrote,
on 1-14-2003 at 5:58pm
Current mood: confused
Music: christina aguilera - "impossible"
Subject: why must boys be so difficult? and why must emotions run so wild?

today was like a weird day. school was okay. obligation that must be fulfilled. but once i got home, i got this overwhelming feeling that i hate everyone and i hate life and i started to cry but i stopped myself. thank god! anyways...

boys, boys, boys. luan made a journal about why girls dont ask guys out. so i thought maybe i would make an entry about how guys dont even know how much they mess with us girls. and how they break our hearts. when they have no idea that we're crushing on them, they do things and deep down, you can see it in our eyes... its hard to explain. the guy i liked... past tense now [or so i think]... he knew i liked him, and he said he didnt want a girlfriend... and then later he goes and gets a girlfriend. and it hurt so much, its undescribable and thats what every girl fears.

when we like a guy, he's our number one priority and everything is for him. we come to school for him, we wear things for him, and we act a certain way just for him. but when the guy we like, doesnt put US on the top of HIS priority list... it hurts. cuz its like we did it all for nothing. and this happens more than guys think. every girl knows what i'm talking about. and then like me, we try to move on and we try to forget that part of our heart and how it was stolen and never returned. and the guy never ends up knowing of how bad he hurt a girl.

and so when we go to like another guy, we don't want that to happen again. we dont want to fall too soon [but we do anyways] and we dont want to be hurt. and then it happens all over again. its one vicious cycle. asking a guy out is like putting our head [more like our heart] under a pendulum, waiting to see what'll happen, what the guy will do. after that, we never show our feelings or how heartbroken we are to that guy. cuz then we feel weak. and we are weak, when it comes to matters of the heart. more so than most boys.

"it's impossible to love you if you dont let me know what you're feeling. its impossible for me to give you what you need if you're always hiding from me. i dont know what hurts you, i just wanna make it right. cuz boy im sick and tired of trying to read your mind. its impossible for me to love you. its impossible to make it easy if you're always making it so damn hard. how can i give you all my love if you always puttin up your guard? this is not a circus, dont you play me for a clown. how long can emotions keep on going up and down? it's impossible for me to love you."
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aare001

01-14-03 7:12pm

hey, same thing can happen to a guy. its not like guys can get crushed and be turned down and be hesitent to ask some1 out again. and, girls too can be cruel to guys. usually when watching tv shows and stuff its the girl who pushes the guy back and uses him.

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aare001

Re:, 01-14-03 7:14pm

oops, i meant to put "can't" instead of can, and also "crushes" instead of "crushed"..stupid typos

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spinoangel

Re:, 01-14-03 9:17pm

lol. yeah i know, luan, i understand that some girls do very destructive things to guys' hearts too, but thats just cuz those girls are bitches. and the majority of us are sweethearts.... right, danielle? lol. luan, if you knew all the things i knew... wow you'd be so different. so would ALL guys.

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AlwaySFallinG

Exactly, 01-14-03 7:53pm

Do you like read my mind or something? Guys never see behind the closed doors... when you are all alone inside and basically your heart is breaking to pieces... let me know if your a guy and if you have ever felt this way before. Also, the lil TV show stuff... it doesn't work, b.c that isn't real life, some girls are bitches when it comes to that, but that is a very small portion of girls.

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aare001

Re: Exactly, 01-14-03 9:28pm

ok christina..i didnt write those comments! that was my partner in crime alex evenson. A-L-E-X E-V-E-N-S-O-N not me!! dont you ever confuse me for a whiteboy! JKJKJKJK!!
but it seriously was alex

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aare001

Re: Re: Exactly, 01-14-03 9:31pm

WHOA, hey, that wasnt me who wrote that stuff, it was luan, and so what if im a whiteboy luan!!!! :P something wrong??!

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spinoangel

Re: Re: Re: Exactly, 01-15-03 6:06pm

gosh you guys! lol. white boys... yall are confusin, how am i sposed to know?! i dont know u guys!


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vanna7888

so true, 01-15-03 7:18pm

that is so true. i mean i told german i liked him and wut does he do he says he just wants to be "friends" so that nothing would change but things did change. i no how u feel. its hard to ask a guy out and im sure its hard for them to ask us out but we all fear rejection. thats one of the few things we all have in common.

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