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blueyed (profile) wrote,
on 5-16-2004 at 3:08am
I've come to the revelation, and yet again the acknowledgement that everything that doesn't happen, was never suppose to. And when I say that I don't mean predestination, or "your life is mapped out" blasphemy. I just think some things don't happen at a particular time or at all for certain reasons all adding up to what will be best for oneself.

Personally, in certain situations I'll always jump to the conclusion that I am wrong, my actions are not appropriate( which in most cases means no action being taken) yet in some it comes so natural, and feels right and relatively easy. Same goes with opinions,in terms of people, you have to wonder about the reasons as to why you can connect with certain people and not others
you have to wonder about who you love and who you are weary of. You have to wonder about the people you put in such a position over yourself, only to figure out that your quality of a person is far greater, and the most wonderful thing you saw in them was surprisingly a projection of whats within yourself.

Basically what I'm getting at is not so much that we always have the right answers, but perhaps we shouldn't beat ourselves up about the actions we take when in reality we wish we could do the opposite. Its that thing that keeps you back that makes me question alot, and it used to serve as a huge cancer on my self image but I'm starting to believe that its some sort of intuitive force, pushing you towards things that would be benefical, and steering clear from things that would be detrimental. Like love for instance, I guess it pushes you towards those who would be furfilling and worthwhile and keeps you away from those who are out to hurt you/take advantage and eventually leave you with nothing. When you defy it, you are open to heartache which is good sometimes you need to experience bad things to gain insight. In this light I suppose I'm thankful for alot of things, but yet again I take from other people's lives and experiences, never my own. Thats my one regret if I were to have one, assuming not based upon my world but someone else's. In a nutshell, we should trust ourselves and have more confidence in our internal decisions cause they are based on what would be good for us, by nature we are not self distructive, not maladaptive, we just want what is best. I'll try to respect myself, and leave the self defeat out of it, instead of comign to the conclusion that I am "wrong" I'll think of why I honestly cant do certain things, through self examination/cognition, why do we do the things we do? Good qustion, all good questions merit good answers.
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niofalcon

01-13-07 7:04am

I'm not sure how I got here but (I think searching for people in Boca) I just wanted to ask you if I knew you? some of your entries bring about a certain familiarity... my name is Justo, btw.

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