| Add Memory | Add To Friends | |
| n01under5tand5 (profile) wrote, on 5-24-2004 at 10:25pm | |
| Subject: Little Hiden Secrets ....The Truth is Now Revealed |
|
| You never really realize how much you know and have gained from all your losses until you write down all your problems and flaws and then it dawns on you.You didn't learn the majority of what you know from you parents, but from you experiences. Like me you already know if you have been following up my moms a drunk and somewhat abusive and my dads abusive and although until recent I feared telling people I stopped feeling the need to hide thanks to two very great people recently taking the time to get to know those people are Erica and John. I'm so thankful for them to me Erica is like a sister I told her everything about my life my problems with coping with my grandmother and step sisters death my drugie aunt my suicidal mother whos attempted not only to take her own life, but mine as well my dad beatings and words and his attempted rape incident I told her it all in detail. Things I wish I could tell John, but as much as I know he won't reject me I'm still afraid of the reaction and generally him hating my parents for it. I found a way to forgive forget and move on and now I feel its time to stop hiding and keeping secrets. Iuse to cut don't be alarmed it was once over a whole lot of shit and I gave in and it was stupid and i wish i hadn't because now I look at the deeply indented scars and I don't wonder why, but yet another question creeps in which is how. How could I and then i think the best way to quit is resolve the prolem deep down and tell others why they shouldnt do it soooo.... Don't pitty me please I don't need it nor do I want it don't tell me your sorry for me I'm fine and still living life and everyday things get a little bit better new friends and relationships are formed and old ones kept. Life seems flawless in the present with two new found friends although Erica seems more to me like a sister like I personal need her in my life for a reason and John I "heart" him and need him he's making me so happy with me and my over all life thank you guys and Kristi and BBMAK and Joey and Nicole and Jamie and Laura you guys have helped me through alot and given me second chances so thankz. Now you know a little bit more about the world in which I live in. Worlds apart separately common grounds come between you and me and we see somewhat eye to eye we relate and yet you never noticed it before not like I did not like I knew I saw in something I needed and I will never forget how you forgave and forgot I will never forget the second chance you gave me to get to know me I will never for get the good words you have said to me although the bad are far behind me now and all I can think is how much I care about you and need you like I never would have thought I never knew someone who I thought hated me and could never change that opinion of me could understand me so well and have so much in common with me I'm thankful I'm thankful for you and everybody who's touch me in a special way. *Dedicated* mainly to Erica, but also includes the other people named above thankz much to all of you. you've helped me threw so much and made my life more livable so I lovez ya 4 that...! |
|
| Post A Comment |
|
n01under5tand5 | fuck don't leave your hate comments wasting my fucking time, 05-24-04 11:00pm this is june dont fucking leave any comments about me not having a life ......unless u leave a fucking name so i can see what kind of life u have at least i have something to write about damn ... and people who wirte about me having no life mustn't have much of one either if they are wasting their time on telling me i have no life and at least i'm grounded and i still have a life outside of school ur probably free no lifers spend every second with your beety eye ball fixed on the computer screen talking to your online dates that plan to rape you in a hotel a month from now.... |
| Anonymous | :), 05-25-04 9:31pm June, im sooooo glad i help you feel better, and weather you believe it or not you make me feel A LOT better also, you basically changed my entire life. Your so incredible, well im talking to you on aim, so i guess im done...LOL...John (MHB) |