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| sparkythefool (profile) wrote, on 8-25-2004 at 10:36pm | |
| School will be the death of me, I swear. I just woke up on top of my history book because I'm so drained I can't keep my eyes open for one paragraph. I still have half of my math homework to do, a bunch of Spanish work from today and yesterday, the rest of chapter three to read, and then when I'm finally done with that, I have to spend god knows how long outlining it. Sounds like a lot of work, but that's only half of it..I already finished the other half. I decided that this year, I'm going to try to do my own homework as much as possible and only copy other people's as an extreme last resort. So, because of that, I force myself to stay up freaking late each night until all my homework is either done or rather close to being so. I'm getting an average of three or four hours of sleep a night. I can't take naps during the day because I get home from cross country around four or five exhausted if the workout was hard (and it typically is) and then immediately have to start on homework or do something else equally pertinent. This is especially difficult because all last year, I slacked off and didn't start homework until ten or eleven. So somehow the time slips away and before I know it, it's eight, nine, ten o'clock and I've barely done anything. It's not helping that half my classes are APs, but I can't complain about that. I brought that on myself and I'm determined to do as well as possible in those classes and not quit. Of course, that takes extra effort on my part. I know I'm capable of it..I'm smart enough. I've often wondered what would happen if I actually applied myself completely in school for once. Maybe I'll find out this year. Maybe not. Chances are, I'll get tired (ha) of this whole routine of getting a few hours sleep each night and then still having to be a good student, a good runner, a good daughter, a good sister, a good friend, etc. You watch, I'll start slacking soon. That's not what I want though..just give me a day, ONE day to get things together and I'll be fine. Really. Sad that it's only the second week of school and I already feel like this. I just need to convince myself that I can handle it..I mean, I know I can, but do I want to? That's what I can't figure out. I tell myself that yes, I want this, that's why I picked these classes and these activities and everything, but I don't know. I just..god, I don't know. Fuck it. | |
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| Anonymous | 08-26-04 4:19am I think you described me not yourself. Except for when you said be a good sister and runner. |
sparkythefool | Re:, 08-30-04 3:54am Too bad we're smart and therefore put ourselves in all the hard classes. Jeez. |
| Anonymous | 08-26-04 5:36pm I feel so overwhelmed as well. I have school, a night class, homework, and work. It sounds trite compared to your situation but I can absolutely relate. I hope things get easier for you.
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sparkythefool | Re:, 08-30-04 3:56am It doesn't sound trite at all. Different situations affect people differently (I was going to say different people but that would be overkill), so what may be hard for you could be incredibly overwhelming to me. Does that make sense? |
| Anonymous | 08-28-04 1:56am GOOOOOO Team Nancy! I know you'll be fine :) you're excellentness.
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sparkythefool | Re:, 08-30-04 3:56am Too bad I can't quit school and come live in Missouri. That would be nice. |
| Anonymous | Ooooh! Looky Me!, 08-30-04 3:02am Hey nanc, I'm commenting on your journal, aren't you happy?
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sparkythefool | Re: Ooooh! Looky Me!, 08-30-04 3:58am Comments make me happy in a stupid sort of way, so yeah, I am happy about yours.
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