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musicalbabe (profile) wrote,
on 10-10-2004 at 5:22pm
Subject: A Rant is Needed
So I'm working on my stupid fucking Chem homework that's going to take me forfuckingever because I'm going to need to teach it all to myself AS WELL as catch up on like all of last week's homework, (which I decided not to do because I didn't have to) when the phone rings. After the third ring, very annoyed, I pick up the phone. It's this weird lady from church who proceeds to tell me all about why she's calling (because my mom's a lay leader and she was just wondering if the lay leaders have talked about the morality concerning stem cell research and she thought it might be nice to get a group together to discuss the morality behind it so that the voting churchmembers can have a clearer understanding of the moral issues concerning the topic *on and on and on and on*) before I hand the phone to my mom who walks out of her room, hair all messed up, who's obvoiusly been asleep.

My mom is fucking TAKING A NAP while I'm making like 100 flashcards for fucking chem which I'LL NEVER USE IN MY FUCKING LIFE EVER and won't even answer the fucking phone.

AND SHE GOT ALL ON MY CASE THIS MORNING BECAUSE I DIDN'T MANAGE MY TIME WELL ENOUGH THIS MORNING TO GET ENOUGH HOMEWORK DONE AND I SHOULD GO TO CHOIR AND YOUTH GROUP TONIGHT.

So she can fucking take a nap and do jack shit all day while I'm irresponsible for trying to juggle 8 classes a day along with marching band, horseback riding, voice lessons, and church shit? Mmm k.

Not sure why every little thing is changing my mood so drastically, but I think I just need a huge fucking rest from everything until I can calm down to the point where I think I can handle it.
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iwish2bemilkywhite

10-10-04 10:29pm

Don't you fucking hate fucking life?

<3

(reply to this)

musicalbabe

Re:, 10-10-04 10:36pm

yes, i fucking do.

but then there are probably more moments where i'm thinking 'boy, do i LOVE life' than these when i'm frustrated with life.

but yes, right now, i totally fucking hate fucking life.

*note* in case you don't know that i'm quite lightly using the word 'fuck', i am. don't freak out and think that i'm all goth and emo and freaky. i'm not.

(reply to comment)

KirbyDee

10-11-04 12:41am

Sweetie, I'm sorry. I know how you feel and considering you have soooo much more to do than I, I can only sympathatize (sp?). You're doing great, but you're going to drive yourself insane and trust me, I say that with LOADS of experience. You need to give yourself just a few minutes everyday, just breath and relax and clear your mind. Trust me, even if it's just a few mintues or whether you can spare an hour, it'll make you feel so much better. in the meantime, try not to think about how you have to work harder than your mom. I hope things start looking up and that you get time to rest. *hugs mucho*

(reply to this)

musicalbabe

Re:, 10-11-04 1:15am

awww thanks!! *grins* actually, i really don't have all that much more than you, i just make it sound like i do and convince myslef that i do from time to time. if i could learn to manage my time better and figure out the best way to study and help me retain things it'd be different...

thanks so much for the encouraging note! love you too! hope you had an awesome time at modesto!! i know I did! whoo!

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iwish2bemilkywhite

Re: Re:, 10-11-04 6:20pm

EW MELISSA YOU'RE SO EMO

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Anonymous

OMFG, 10-11-04 8:13pm

Dude, I know this sounds not sympathetic but that entry was so emo-teenage steryotype. But I love you and I do feel empathy. Feel the love man!
Okay so I know you're like GAH I AM ON OVERLOAD! So around Feburary next year when we have to sign up for classes I am going to dig this up and show it to you to help you remeber why you should only be taking six classes or something. Okay, maybe seven. But that's at the MOST.
Maybe you could stop doing something as much? Because you're a busy girl and I know you expect a lot from youself. Maybe cut back on the church going or something? (ooh Louise is so bad) but I mean spending ALL of Sunday singing when you have all this stuff to do might not be so productive. But that's just my opinion. I can't exaclt put myself in your shoes seeing as I'm only taking six classes and by the time track rolls around it's bye bye health so that's five. Put don't worry, I'll run extra laps for you and give you some of my endorphins so you can be all happy and it'll be great. Hahaha.

(reply to comment)

musicalbabe

Re: OMFG, 10-11-04 10:17pm

yay! spread the endorphines!!

yay for emo kids!! i empathise!

oh, and since that whole english discussion about serial killers not having empathy, (i think you had to be there...) i have been TOTALLY into the whole empathy thing.

yay for endorphines, emo kids, empathy, being stressed, and not managing time well!!

<3 you all! :0D


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