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moana (profile) wrote,
on 12-30-2004 at 12:38am
Music: The Strokes - Take It or Leave It
Subject: ToTo-ology 102
Faygo is a highly toxic liquid that is fatal to the ToTo. If a ToTo imbibes said substance, its hoo-hoo will wither and die.



This is definitely fatal to a ToTo.



In case the punis gets tired or broken from overuse, a ToTo has multiple sexual organs. A ToTo is a multi-hoohooed subspecies, like an alien!



A ToTo is very sensitive to touch, but not to beating. You are much more likely to raise a ToTo's angry response by touching its hair than you are by slapping its ass. Hair-touching is a very sensual experience to a ToTo and shall not under any circumstances be undermined, elsewise a ToTo is known to scratch, bite, punch and kick in the balls. Though usually docile, adorable creatures, ToTos have been known to attack dogs. ToTos dislike dogs. ToTos dislike dogs very very much.



In a recent experiment, the ToTo has had DingDongs infiltrated into its diet. This has caused the ToTo great confusion and delight as it satisfies sweet taste buds and inflicts childish laughter at the hoo-hoo type nature of the name of this product.



The ToTo is notable for inventing more terms and phrases for sexual encounters than should be legally possible. Most prominent are hoo-hah and wiki-wiki.

[No image available at this time.]

Much like the comic book heroes of old, the ToTo has a singular weakness that renders it incapable of eating OR hoo-hahing. This is the common household product that in layman speak is referred to as 'cheese'.



In conclusion, be careful of where you touch a ToTo and what you give it to eat and drink. To win a ToTo's favour, it is advisable to give your ToTo froghurt, Pepsi (not Coca Cola) or choclate custard. A ToTo will also take doughnuts from nice Catholic boys.




This is a ToTo, this is me. Take it or leave it. If you take it, take it all and if you leave it...

Save a ToTo. Screw abstinence.
Save a ToTo. Go on a diet.
Post A Comment



metalhead

12-29-04 4:53am

*does the Mike and Matt "I DON'T CARE!" dance*

Britney looks like she's wearing a gilly suit.

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guajiragoddess

12-29-04 11:04am

What is wrong with Coke? And what is wrong with cheese? You'd rather have your ass groped than your hair petted? All that intimacy bullshit can't be true - shoot me now. And dogs are great, honestly, does your hatred of them stem from some religious emotional attatchment? You'll have to explain it to me someday because I'm not disgusted with cats like you are with dogs...I'd just prefer playing with them.

*skims over page*

Other than that, those pictures are full of all the techie art stuff that I can't do so, congrats on the picture story of your life!

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moana

Re:, 12-29-04 12:42pm

Coke tastes horrible. and so does cheese. and i hate dogs because... talk to laurence about it, he knows.

intimacy? shoot you? huh? *blink*

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metalhead

Re:, 12-29-04 4:23pm

I'd like to butt in and take credit for my ingenious Alien-Cheeseburger creation.

Thank you, thank you.

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guajiragoddess

Re: Re:, 12-29-04 6:18pm

I don't want to talk to Laurence about it! Tell me why you don't like dogs!

Yeah all I'm saying is I'd rather my ass be left alone if it were some asshole. I'd be more prone to punch someone who grabbed my ass than someone who petted my head.

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moana

Re: Re: Re:, 12-30-04 2:59am

someone grabbing my ass at least i know what they're after. someone who petted my head, well, they're puzzlers. i don't like being puzzled. *makes a face*

and i don't like dogs because... ask joe he knows all about it.

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guajiragoddess

Re: Re: Re: Re:, 12-30-04 12:10pm

I don't want to ask Joe!

I like using primary sources for this sort of thing.

Hot damn, this is what I get for knowing how to ask for what I want. So much for being direct.

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WhitePony

12-29-04 3:24pm

*takes notes...plenty of notes*

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moana

Re:, 12-30-04 3:03am

*pulls your ears* where did you drop out of my life to these past few days?

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cowboy67

Re: Re:, 12-31-04 11:56am

well, i think you two made up for it yesterday... how many hours was it? over 10?

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chuckfriend

01-01-05 5:05pm

the strokes are yummy. good choice

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moana

Re:, 01-02-05 3:38am

thank you, i agree heartily. "Is This It" is my favourite album.

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cowboy67

01-02-05 5:48pm

so, i've been meaning to comment on this madness. first of all, i love when you make these. it should be done as often as possible. perhaps you could even start doing other people, like danielle or joe.

1. where'd you get that faygo picture? did you superimpose things?

2. the witch thing was very clever.

3. hilarious picture of the alien, alyssa.

4. i don't get why britney is on there...

5. the ding dong picture you found is freaking awesome! look how the treats used to be wrapped in tin foil. that's classic, wow.

6. i love how there's a random clip art picture thrown in there.

7. skeletor is in your coke!

so are you saying i should make love to abstinence in order to save you? do explain how this works. and, well, no diets for me. my uhrmy needs all the nutrients it can get!

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moana

Re:, 01-02-05 5:53pm

1- i just googled faygo and i got that! how crazy huh?
2- the witch thing was andy's idea.
3- that thing still freaks me out, but not as much as the other one she wanted me to use.
4- britney's a dog.
5- i couldn't find a more recent one!
6- there is?
7- yes, coke is evil.

um.... it's 2 am stop being a smart ass laurence. *pushes you over*

hahahaha, i think it'd be FUN to do other people, starting with YOU.

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moana

Re: Re:, 01-02-05 5:55pm

and i do'nt mean that in the dirty perverted way, 'doing joe and danielle', just making clear.

p.s. oh yeah, the cheese is clip art! i get it i get it.

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