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bacardi (profile) wrote,
on 1-4-2005 at 1:17pm
Current mood: cold
Music: Cold - Outerspace
Subject: Addicted

As I sit here at work shivering listening to my mp3 player, I glanced over at my cell phone and realized there is no reason to have it at work. Back when I was still attached I had a reason to have it around, we would text each other pretty much all day so leaving it at home left me outta the loop with her, but now it seems pretty pointless. Everyone that I would text or call is either at work or school so its not like I am really expecting to hear from anyone. Plus besides using it in my past relationship it was only used to get ahold of people and see what they are doing, once that was found out then we would probably be hanging out, so its never really been used for an extended period when not involving a girlfriend. Hmm.... Funny how pointless it became in one swoop.

Okay some real stuff...
This last weekend actually Jan. 1st was my parents 25th wedding anniversary, that me and my brother (with MAJOR help from our aunt) put on for them. It was a success, made me kinda sad because about 8 months to a year ago I thought I was with the girl that I would be marrying and celebrating this same thing with. I'm not over her, who am I kidding I think about her everyday still, even though most of the time I am pissed at her, and I can seriously say that I would not take her back. All that said I still think about what she is up to, but who can blame me, for 3+ years I knew what she was doing and where she was every freaking second.

Anyway on the day of the party my brother and I went to go buy some ice, I drove all the way across town to see if the water store was open, which it wasn't, so we just went to the Stator Bros that was right there. It turns out we see this kid Chris Luke, he is the youngest brother of Kyle and Kevin Luke. They were these boys we were friends with back in Pomona (when I was in like 3rd grade). Anyway it was wierd because they moved out here and so did we. Oh yah for those that don't know my name is Kevin and my brother is Kyle so yah it was strange to have two brother of the same name move to the same place after leaving the same place.

Anyway... We see him at the store and he just kinda walks by acting all hard... Whatever.... then all of a sudden Kyle says "Is that megan and kristi?" and I turn and sure enough at the other end of the store is my ex (the one I was talking about earlier) and her stupid friend. So it turns out that Chris was with them. Small world considering all the other stuff, especially if he is WITH my ex, but I won't ever know for sure because I sure am not gonna call her.

All that and I still can't settle down, I thought writing it out would get it off my chest but its not working. How do you hate someone when its not in you to actually hate anyone? Even if they did break your heart and then take you back just to stomp on it... Okay I will shutup now!

Peace.
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kaneface

01-04-05 6:18pm

It's hard to let go of something that was so real for so long. I feel ya. Everything reminds you of that inside joke or the code name you had for certain things. It's rough but taking it one day at a time is the best advice I could possibly give. Smile it's the second best thing you can do with your lips!

-Lauren

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WhitePony

01-04-05 8:45pm

It'll take some time bud. and you know im always here for you to vent/trash talk/whatever you need man. i love you buddy

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buttercup954

01-04-05 9:40pm

kevy i'll text you while you're at work <3

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