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| breezeyluvsu (profile) wrote, on 4-27-2005 at 1:35pm | |
| This is going to be a whiney entry so beware: It all started this weekend. It was just. aweful. It was supposed to be this perfectly planned weekend for me and heather to spend time together and me and dan to spend time together but blah. Me and dan hung out friday but we were supposed to hang out saturday too but I went to jordans brothers wedding *which by the way was awesome jorda*. after that we had brenton come and get us and brought us bowling where we met up with dan, danny, and some other girl. It was alright. Then sunday was just...horrible. I bought this watch for dan and i lost it. I cant find it anywhere! and he keeps asking about it and ...ugh ive looked everywhere. Oh well. Last night... My mom turned off my minutes to prove a point to me that i need to start listening to f***** miss scott.. pfff. she yelled at me cos i wore a short skirt. Mr a seen it and didnt say one word to me. She told me to change it and of course me and my cocky self said ok yeah let me just go home for lunch to get clothes and get detentions for that instead miss scott. I told dan what happened and he totally wigged out. First he was upset cos i wore a short skirt. THen he got upset cos i told him he cant tell me what to wear. Then he got upset cos i am disrespectful to my authority figures. Then he got mad at me...and just stayed mad. So i tried to go to bed. at quarter to one this morning dan called me and hes like what are you doing i said doing my hair * cos I really was* and then hes like well why and i told him cos i couldnt sleep cos hes pissed off at me for no reason what so ever and he apologized to me and blahdy blah. Damn. Sometimes i really, really get frustrated with him more than anyone will ever know... I really love him...dont get me wrong. I couldnt imagine my life without you. But there has got to be some changes. He gets upset when i talk to those guys that i guess "want me"...chea, right. Anyways... its a 2 way street. I dont want him in constant contact with all these icky girls calling him 24/7. I am a very , very territorial person. Whats mine is mine and i dont have to share what i dont want to. Its almost like i have to fight to keep him. I really cant stand it. I cant handle the fact that something better and taller and skinnyier could walk past him any fricken' time of the day and snatch him away from me. . . Im pathetic. Beyond pathetic. I just want...i want what is in movies. What that feeling is when they look into each others eyes and they are so lost in conversation talking about anything and everything. I want to be lost in a conversation. I want to be held and kissed and caressed with love. I want that feeling. Not just words. I couldnt help myself from crying monday and it really scared me. Dan was over and i just started bawling. I couldnt explain it. But i knew it was a red flag. I couldnt explain how i felt about him. WIth other guys it was like...this is how i feel about you and this is why i like you and this is why i want to be with you and this is how you make me feel. The only thing i can say about dan is that i feel complete. I dont know why im so involved with him, but i just am. I cant...explain into any words just how i feel about him and it really, really scares me ya know? So my friends, once again are changing right in front of my eyes. I hate the fact that people can change just like that. In the blink of an eye somebody changes. Its unrealistic. Jordan, i really, really wanted you to know just how much you mean to me. We've been through so much its unbelievable... And me and you hangin out like it. It was the most fun ive had in a really long time. Jenna, once again im really sorry if that was about me you dont have to say anything if it really was, but i just want you to know that i miss talkin [ well online i guess ] but we need to hang out this saturday okay? please save saturday for me!?! Lots of love Ashley i have that poster board in my locker-- ASHLEY, ashley, AsHlEy.. lol ashley understands this and only ashley. lol Im tired of pittying myself so im off . I love you more then you'll ever know. |
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jordanmackenzie7 | 04-27-05 3:26pm We'll always be friends, Brie. |
kellilynn21 | 04-27-05 4:16pm Things Will Get Better. They Always Do:). |
swimfan14 | 04-27-05 4:37pm "Ashley i have that poster board in my locker--
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breezeyluvsu | Re:, 04-28-05 1:49pm You four rock, but not as much as jordan who doesnt as much as kelly, who doesnt as much as ashley, who doesnt as much asjenna who doesnt as much as jordan...haha get it? lol
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jennapie | 04-27-05 10:22pm I love you Brie!! and no I can honestly say that none of that had to do with you sweetie! I love you! and we do need to talk. This Saturday would be a great day to hang out!!! and guess what!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!?!? IT'S MY BIRTHDAY TOO!!!!!!!!! jhaahahahah we should do something, and Sunday night I work, so come and see me! Talk to you soon! LOVE! |