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| Namu (profile) wrote, on 7-29-2005 at 5:17pm | |
| Current mood: pissed off |
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| I think this weekend will be my last fun time here. Today was so fucking boring. Just sat around all day. My mom brought up conversation about me leaving...didn't make me feel very good. She says we're going to leave on the 21st, and also wants me to keep my schedule closed during the 20th, so I can have one last "family time". My mom says I'd better not plan on hanging out with anyone that day cause I probably won't be able to. God, you know, I'm just so close to the end and at the same time I want to give up. Good news is I can go to Porcupine Bay with their family and the fireworks show, but the time I spend with her really isn't "precious" anymore. I'm not saying that in a mean way, it's just that with only twenty more days here, anything that happens now won't really mean too much cause I already feel like I'm gone. *sigh* It's just so close you know... the last eighteen years of my life sped by, why wouldn't the next few weeks do the same. ...hmm...I'm only really sad because I am leaving the people I have come to care for deeply. I wish I would have found them a lot sooner... " I feel like Tera is ripping me apart from the inside even though I'm not dead yet.Have I really completed my mission so quickly that I have to leave it all behind now?" |
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godessalthena | 07-29-05 9:11pm No. The 'family time' is not happening on the 20th. If it does I'm going to your house and dragging you out of it if it means I have to face your mom and dad and brother. I don't care what they say.
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Namu | Re:, 07-29-05 9:50pm Yeah. I knew you wouldn't be too happy when I told you this. Thinking that made me sad. I don't mean that the time isn't a value to me, it's just that even if I hang on to every last day we have together, it doesn't necessarily mean that they will be the best days I will remember. Btw, nice complicated word. |