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godessalthena (profile) wrote,
on 2-4-2009 at 2:48pm
i hate this.
i hate how i always feel like utter shit.
no matter what.
and nothing can fix it.
and i'm a total bitch to everyone
and all i can think about is dying or eating.

i just want to cry.

i hate my life sometimes.
mostly because i make my life a living hell.
i don't want my birthday to come.
i don't want anything to come.
i just want to crawl in a hole and fall asleep forever.
then i wouldn't offend anyone.
or hurt anyone's feelings..
or anything.

i would do nothing.
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lillypad

02-04-09 6:50pm

...who is "everyone"...?
...what's wrong with your birthday?

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godessalthena

Re:, 02-04-09 9:57pm

mostly sus, but i'm a bitch to you and lauren and josh and my family.. everyone.

i've begun hating my birthday starting senior year. i dread it every year.. i never want it to come.. i get all excited, then either it totally sucks or someone mkes me feel bad about getting excited so i just.. hate it.

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angel_bob

02-04-09 11:38pm

Then stop?

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rorin

02-05-09 5:22pm

Then just cry. Why would you stop yourself from crying? It feels like such a release. I also think you should paint. Paint and draw. Do a million pictures and let it all out. Let out all your pain and frustration. Let out your fears and anger. Let everything go all at once and just start from scratch. You're in the best position possible right now. The only place to go is up. So make it a great time to start your life stairs to redemption and get your life back in order.

Stress is overwhelming. If you ever need someone to talk to, I won't judge you. And it might take a while to get to happiness but the trip is worth it.

ily <3

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