eddy
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2006 6 July :: 11.08pm
It's a cruel (cruel) cruel summer (cruel summer)
-Ace of Base "Cruel Summer"
4 trys |
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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eddy
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2006 3 July :: 11.21pm
So stay, sweetly numb.
Remain lifeless, love.
-Davey Havok - "Affliction"
4 trys |
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 29 June :: 4.27pm
I've been thinking...
I've been losing friends left and right. Every move I make could cost me a friendship. I had started watching what I was doing/saying so I wouldn't hurt anybody or offend anyone. I didn't want anyone mad at me and I didn't want any conflict or drama to go on...
Half of the people I used to talk to everyday dont even want anything to do with me anymore. For example:: a bunch of my friends are all going to Lake Michigan on Saturday. I didn't find out until Ashley asked if I was going. No one invited me, no one was going to invite me...
Yet no matter how hard I tried to keep everyone happy, things just manage to blow up in my face. I get fucked over everytime I try to keep something going.
It's stupid...
I'm done with being polite and trying to make people like me.
This is who I am::
I drink, I dont have a problem or anything, I just drink. And I dont party with complete strangers, I have fun with friends that I know will take care of me and make sure nothing bad happens to me.
I'm selfish. I like money. After being so unhappy with my parents being in dept most of my life and always wishing to be someone else because of what they have, I do believe that money buys happiness no matter what anyone says.
I hold grudges easily and for a long time. It takes so long for me to get over something even if it's just a little thing and I know that it will all be cleared up in no time, there's still something inside of me that is pissed and wont let it go.
I have a problem with opening up to people.
I dont cry in front of people. I dont like letting everyone know I have a weakness. I dont like people pittying me. It makes me feel stupid and I dont like that feeling too much.
I'm judgemental but I hate being judged.
I have terrible grammar when it comes to typing things online.
I really dont care.
I'm a procrastinator.
I like things to go my way and no other way.
I get pissed when my plans get ruined.
I'm messy. I hate cleaning.
I dont care what people think of me. I used to but things are starting to change.
You either love me or you hate me, there is really no inbetween.
Mindy and Ashley are my 2 best friends in the whole wide world.
And I have a piece of shit car, but atleast it has a speeddometor now.
So this is who I am. If you dont like it, then oh well.
I can make new friends just as fast as I can get read of them.
I hate saying goodbye. But if people dont like who I am, than I suppose it is time. I'm not going to say I dont need anybody, I'm just need someone who's going to be there and like me for me, no matter what my flaws are.
4 trys |
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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eddy
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2006 26 June :: 5.47pm
If I wasn't a hardcore Misanthropist before....
I certainly am now.
10 trys |
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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eddy
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::
2006 26 June :: 5.15pm
Trevor Hall - The Aftermath
I sold my shoes,
for a front-row seat on the moon.
Well I've found all that I can save,
and I still got the blues.
See I picked up the blade,
and shaved my beard.
I walked back into town,
with nothin' to fear.
Well I picked up my mess,
and I put it in the ground.
Well I watered it down,
waited for the sea to spill,
to spill. Yeah.
Well silence fills the air when it's raining.
But I don't see anyone complaining. Yeah yeah.
Well truth, it pokes it's head out.
Yeah truth it pokes it's head out.
Well I took my last rose,
And I threw it in the fire.
I gathered all the ashes, yeah.
Started my empire.
What is it to you?
Well man I'll do what I please.
And when I pray for you,
I don't expect you to pray for me.
Well silence fills the air when it's raining.
Oh, but I don't see anyone complaining.
Well truth it pokes it's head out.
Yeah truth it pokes it's head out.
Well I took a bath.
In the constellation aftermath.
When I jumped off that stone,
You see I looked upon this, plastic place, and I saved it with all my grace.
Well silence fills the air when it's raining,
Oh but I don't see anyone complaining.
Well truth it pokes it's head out.
Yeah truth it pokes it's head out. Yeah.
Silence fills the air when it's raining.
Oh but I don't see anyone complaining.
Well truth it pokes it's head out.
Yeah truth it pokes it's head out.
Truth, it pokes it head out....
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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::
2006 24 June :: 3.20pm
:: Mood: hung over
:: Music: bar noices
last night
Well things were fun at Chris's. Everyone had a good time. Granted some people are retarded but oh well. Fuck it. I give up. I'm just not fat enough right Mindy! lol. I really dont fucking care anymore what anyone thinks. Esspecially last night man. I was a bitch. But in my mind, I think I had every right to be. Oh well. What's done is done and it will never happen again. I was stupid and I should have known better. But a little fucking agknowledgment would have made me a little bit happier. Not much, but some. Oh well. I'm going to marry Aj anyways. lol. The love of my life that will never make me work or pay for boose because I'm pretty. lol. I love that kid, I'm going to miss him while he's gone.
Smashly came for a little while yestereday but then she pussied out. oh well...*shrugs* It would have been ten times more awesome with her there though.
I decided that my brother is the only one allowed to know bits and peices about my "party hardy" lifestyle I've got going on. Because my loud mouth sister made the mistake of letting my mother find out about my after prom party experiance. I made it rated pg though for my mothers sensitive ears though. I swear sometimes, I think I just might be able to get away with murder with these people. Unless I killed Neta. Because they like her more than anyone else. whatever...
Welp, that's my life in a nut shell. party last night was fun, party last weekend was fun. except for when I found a few details out about it last night that I didn't know about. That kinda pissed me off. oh well. I'm sure next weekend will be just as fun though, whatever I may decide to do.
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 23 June :: 7.43pm
well im at chris' house, sitting on sexy aj's lap. and yeah...that's about it
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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eddy
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2006 23 June :: 1.59pm
God.....
....I hate this place and it's stupidity.
14 trys |
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 14 June :: 10.56pm
I think I'll be a stripper when I grow up...
I'm at Mindy's. My internet doesnt fucking work at my house. I have no fucking idea why it doesnt either. It's really starting to bug me but oh well. Not like I've been home much anyways...
Things have been awesome. Working and partying pretty much seem to be the only things on my agenda lately. lol. Went to the barn on saturday, went to some crazy party last night with 3 people from work and like a whole fucking trailor park was there. It was insane. I had a stripper sitting on my lap. She was fucking hillarious. She told me and Mindy that we could come to her house anytime and get drunk with her. We're like fucking right! lol! and then Saturday is my birthday and we're having a party and James' barn after Mindy and I get out of work. It's going to fucking rock. I'm going to get Ashley drunk for the first time. She's going to be so shit face it's going to be hillarious. And Tasha is coming up that day so it's going to be fucking cool! We're going to have so much fun. And I dont have to be to work the next day until 4 so that's kick ass it's self. So yeah. If you're cool you'll be at the party barn saturday night with some presents for me. (When I say presents, that's code for booze)
I've noticed lately that my parents are giving up on. I'm pretty much positive that they know I drink. and I think they dont care. As long as I'm not pregnent and still in school, I suppose nothing it wrong or something. But I fill them full of stupid shit all the time. Like I told them that I was going bowling with people from work last night and then I told them that I wasn't coming home from work on saturday because Mindy, Eddy, Jessica, and Ashley we're having a little "Girls night birthday party" for me (just go with it guys). and they just blew it off. They just dont care. It's insanly disturbing me how they dont care anymore. Like I'm afraid I'm going to be at a party and then they just pop up out of no where or some shit. It's creeping me out to be quite frank with you. But...oh well. What can you do...
Fuck it...!
Welp, I shall me off. My darling Mindy and I must be awakening early in the morn tomorrow to pull some weeds for 6.50 an hour. lol! fucking right!
James Ramiro...I'll call you tomorrow or something man...lol!
26 trys |
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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::
2006 8 June :: 11.52am
So I'm hanging out at Mindy's. She's showering. (surprisingly she did not invite me to shower with her today) lol! but yeah, we wanted to go to the beach today with a buttload of people but we dont think that that will work out. We might have slept in too late because I have to be to work at 4 and whatnot.
We saw the omen last night. It was good.
bye!
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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eddy
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2006 8 June :: 12.24am
:: Mood: excited
Jimmy Kimmel
I never watch this show. It's kind of dumb. But tonight....ah yes, tonight, the absolutely wonderful H.I.M. is musical guest. And I must watch. I haven't seen them live in forever. I could have gone to that show (filmed last Friday). Had I wanted to take a trip to California, and spent a ton of money. So I'm content to just watch it at home, nice and comfy in my home =)
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 4 June :: 8.59pm
Welp, schools out! yay! bonus! But Brixon is leaving soon=( My birthday is in 13 days! yay! Things are kinda awesome lately. Hanging out with my gangster Mindy, being cool an all that jazz. Working a whole fuck load. I'll be rich soon though. It's a given. Working at Burger King will land you in the big times! lol! Brixon spent the night at my house wednesday! lol! We had a grand ol time. It kinda bugs me how everytime I'm just hanging out with a guy for like an hour or more, everyone asks me if we did "stuff". It makes me question how I come off to people. Like I have "I'ma Slutbag" written on my forehead or something. I think my reputation might need to make a tid bit of a turn around or something really soon. But not too soon. (whoa that makes everything sound a whole hell of a lot worse). I dont know. The last few weekends have been fun. I hope something More comes out of all this fun though sooner or later. I dont know. I mean runny around, playing "games" is fun but it seems like it's going to get old. I dont know. Maybe that just goes along with my how I Need To Grow Up lecture I've been giving myself daily. hmm...eh.
In the words of James Ramero...Fuck It!
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 29 May :: 10.35am
Whatta night...
So yeah...Mindy and I went to the appartments last night. fun fun fun...! and yeah...I'm going to see x3 today whether I'm with people or not.
I'd much rather be with people though so no one kidnaps me...any takers?!
please...?
7 trys |
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 27 May :: 4.40pm
One more year...
errg...I swear on everything that is holy, they could not be any more stupid that than already are even if they wanted to be...!
Gah do I hate this place and the peopl e in it with everything I have in me. I cant wait until I leave this all behind.
Oh and you guys probably wont see me tonight seems how my car will be here which is the dumbest thing I could possibly think of...have fun with out me!
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 27 May :: 2.33pm
scratch those plans for today I guess. Brixon is being stupid I guess. I dont know. I'm just moody for some reason. But oh well. Guess I'm going to my sister's all night and then work tomorrow and who knows what's after that. I sure as hell dont.
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 27 May :: 11.39am
plans for today::
Clean
Sister's bday party
Maybe box's bonfire if there's time lol
and Brixon Brixon Brixon...oh corbin too. lol...
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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eddy
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2006 27 May :: 11.04am
Okay. Maybe a strange choice for a first time club, but it was still excellent. I went to Rumors last night. A few things I enjoyed.....
1.Hott guys
2.Hott, half-naked guys
3.Hott, half-naked guys, making out (It's a gay club)
4.Hott stripper guys dancing
SO....yeah. I've never been in a room with so many gay people before, it was strange. Very entertaining however. Why do I love gay guys so much? I really don't know. =S It was foam night too! Crazy stuff I tell you what. There was foam everywhere. It was actually very annoying because we didnt know it was foam night, and as we had clothes on, compared to most of the people, we weren't enjoying it so much. So ummm...yeah. Other than that, I got Fable the other day and I've been playing it, and I love it! lol.
6 trys |
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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::
2006 27 May :: 12.26am
:: Mood: exhausted but with a smile..
:: Music: silverstein
how glorious...!
Well Brixon is finally back. =) But only for a short time. =( But it will be whicked awesome while it last. I love that kid to pieces. And, with an awesome bonus to life, I DO NOT have to work tomorrow because I will be over hours if I do. Which isn't saying much sense because I am still in school, I'm only allowed 15 hours a week or something like that. So yeah, but that's way awesome. I get the whole Saturday off with lots of things to do. I'm thrilled. But I'm extremely tired. So I much be off to my bed where I will sleep in until late in the morning. yay...that will be splended!
3 trys |
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 25 May :: 9.56pm
:: Music: Joyride
So I came to a conclusion today...
I have ADHD
yup...
!
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 24 May :: 5.57pm
:: Music: The Adventure - Angels and Airwaves
fuck this shit...!
Well today was a little gay. For no reason really. but yeah, no reason to make it awesome either. I cant wait till school is out. I'm so sick of being tired and exhausted. I have to go to my niece's preschool graduation tonight so that should be adorable because she's the cutest thing on earth. Yeah...well yeah...lol. I dont know what to say. There's nothing really awesome going on in my life right now because I'm super boring and have no life really. I can not wait until X-3!! YAY!!! I'm so fucking pumped! I'm going by monday no matter what. Even if I have to go by myself, I really dont care! Because I will if I have to!
Damn my neck hurts...
Well three day weekend and then 2 days of school and then summer! yay! excited...! woo!
Welp, catch you cats on the flip side I suppose...
Adios!
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 23 May :: 3.16pm
Holy Shit...!
I'm so fucking tired. I dont even know why. I wish I had more absences left so I could have just skipped today and slept in, BUT...I dont! I have only 2 detentions to serve this time though because I only have 11 in first hour. so yeah..that's only 2. and then I have 9 in 2nd hour, like 4 in 5th hour and then 3 in 3rd, 4th, and 6th. lol. I really need to stop that. I dont know, I just dread coming to school this year. I really dont know why. It's not like I took any super hard classes or anything. I just dont like it. I think I'm getting lazier and lazier by the day. I could probably go to bed right now and just call it a night but I cant do that because I have to finish my anatomy/phys. project on OCD that is due tomorrow. and I have to present it and everything and I just started looking information up yesterday. I guess I should have started a few weeks ago when I found out about the project but...oh well. It's the end of the year, you cant expect the best out of me right now.
Yeah, 4 more day left. I cant wait. I love summer, I love swimming, and sleeping. And oh! Eating too! Eating if probably my favorite. Cause I love food! I love food a whole hell of a lot. It's the best thing on earth. lol!
25 more days until my birthday. It's my golden birthday! yay! 17 on the 17th! It'll be the best! Hopefully something cool and exciting will happen cause that would rock.
Brixon is coming back for a few weeks. He should be here either Friday or Saturday. I'm so excited! I miss him so much. One of the best friends I will ever have right there and I can not wait for all the fun we'll be having. We're going to go on so many dates and we're going to go to skelletones a few nights and junk. It's just going to be magnificent! He's going to stay with Corbin the whole time here so I'll get to hang out with my Corbinator a bunch too which rocks because I miss him too. Too bad his dumbass got expelled. What a fucking idiot....
So yeah, things should be going pretty awesome here pretty quick!
a year and 4 days left of high school for me. Holy shit...I have no idea what I'm going to do with my life. That's terrible. I'm so scared yet so relieved at the same time...
Welp that's enough of me for now...BYE!! =)
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 22 May :: 3.31pm
yup...
i dont know...
I really cant keep doing this to myself. It's just really not cool. It's not too fair to me.
I dont know...
oh well I guess. I'll get over it.
This weekend was fun all in all. I just still need to grow up, grow some sort of a back bone...or a brain, that might help, and just learn to say "No" because I feel kinda bad about myself sometimes. I feel like a bad person...
welp, might not be going to the tattoo parties much anymore...I'm not allowed to anything there. lol! damn you james!
bye....!
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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chelthesmell
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2006 19 May :: 2.54pm
:: Mood: excited but not because i have to go to work befor
:: Music: Beautiful Girl - Poe
My soon to be awesome weekend!
Welp, I've gotta work from 4 till 10 tonight...without Mindy mind you! lol (fuck!) Then it's off to James' barn for an awesome night of fun. yup...that's pretty much my plans for tonight, and then tomorrow we're probably sleeping till Sonia's grad party then I probably have to work on Sunday because that's just how lucky I am or something, I dont know...welp, yup! That's what's going on I assume. So yeah, either see ya there (where ever "There" may be...) or not see you at all! Your choice! lol!
If you would like to make a call, plz hang up and try again
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