godessalthena
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2018 26 January :: 7.18am
What do you do when someone doesn't think people give them a chance when it's really them not giving anyone else a chance?
Idk. Life is way more challenging than I ever dreamed it would be.
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godessalthena
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2018 22 January :: 6.49pm
Big birthday plans for a special work friend
I'm kinda hoping she's kinda underwhelmed with the stuff and then when she comes back she's hella surprised!!
But I didn't want ta make her too sad that we "forgot" her birthday so I'm bringing french macarons and we got her a beautiful card and some flowers... Then on Wednesday she'll have 12 rainbow balloons 2 unicorn balloons and a desk covered in streamers and confetti!
I don't usually go too far out, but we always kinda forget her birthday when she always goes all out for our birthdays... I love her so much, and her family doesn't appreciate her like they should! So I want her to feel appreciated at least once this year!!
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godessalthena
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2018 10 January :: 7.31pm
Watching the land before time, not even 10 minutes in and I'm all ready bawling
Brings back a flood of memories... What would my life be like if all that stuff never happened to me... Who would I be without little foot?
The sense of loss is definable now, back then I resonated so strongly with this movie.. growing up way too fast, but never losing the kindness inside.
Now I'm a hedgehog, prickly with you get too close. I'm hard to hold and even more difficult to grab onto
Impossible to keep close...
I just wish I could go back and do it over again without everything else. I don't think I would be very different. Maybe I'd just be better.
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godessalthena
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2018 10 January :: 6.47pm
feeling small and a million miles away
I just want to shrink until I cease to exist
The thickest dirt and the darkest mud
Deepest charcoal soot and dirt
Mix up the ashes until I disappear
No warrior no Amazon no savior
Just weak and pathetic
Minimalist imprints breathless walking
Leave me behind and forget
I am gone
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godessalthena
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2018 10 January :: 7.53am
I've been sleeping a lot lately, but not the nice restful kind, rather the kind where you just spin all night then wake up 2 hours early and can't get back to sleep.
I'm sad today. I just want to hide under a rock and pretend I don't exist. Hopefully I get an early out today.
My last check was $200 short, which hurt a little, but it's nice not having to worry about rent or a car payment. What are student loans going to do? Rape me and steal my dog? Well maybe with this new president.... Should I worry? Haha
But 2 appointments with my therapist costs about $200 and having so much time away from work has really helped my mental health lately. More than seeing my therapist, so I'll take the loss and mark it as a win.
I just have to say, after spending close to $500 on gifts for my sweetie for Xmas if he doesn't get me a good damned bathrobe for a super late gift I'm going to he so mad.
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