woohu HQ

:: 2016 18 August :: 11.42am

I live fat ugly and stupid
I'll die old alone and unloved

I try so hard to be seen
but I've never been more invisible

:: 2016 17 August :: 9.52pm

http://www.theonion.com/article/i-cant-do-anymore-think-320-million-americans-quie-53534

Every single day of the last 3 and a half years of my life.

:: 2016 15 August :: 9.55pm

♥ If you're there for me, that's all I'll ever need.

:: 2016 15 August :: 5.25pm

I fuck up too much to be a good relationship partner.

I can't feel enough to be a good relationship partner.

I will always be weird inside, I will always be lame.

:: 2016 14 August :: 9.20am

I feel so fucking guilty for being a home body.

but the older I get the less and less I want to spend time with new humans. they just aren't worth it.

especially now that I am the DD 99% of the the time. being the sober cat around a bunch of drunk dogs fickin blows. no amount of being checked on will make me have a better time.

I'm just a big old lame ass. I can't even get drunk anymore. my belly starts to hurt before I feel anything.

I suck.

:: 2016 12 August :: 6.40pm

I could be happy forever with my cinnamon girl

:: 2016 8 August :: 11.48am

got my in person interview tomorrow!!!

so excite much nerves!

1 prop | give me props

:: 2016 5 August :: 6.56pm

optimistic about a new role at LM. I really hope I get it. I'm nervous because they have a few people that they didn't hire last round they are considering, but I'm thinking

+ they have had this post up forever, but the recruiter really wants to move me to the next round

+ this recruiter is the same one who moved me forward in the last adjuster role I had. the remembered me and was very warm and friendly. I feel that she will fight a lil harder for me.

+ my boss gave me all the tips to win the interview. she has been so supportive of me my whole career

- I am leaving her team but I want to be on her team so badly

I just feel so stressed about meeting my numbers down there, by the end of the day I'm just completely fried. I shouldn't have to justify leaving to myself, it's a nice pay increase for me and after being here for 6 years I feel like I should be higher than a grade 9... it's a little embarrassing I guess..

I just want to get myself out of this hole and start saving and living my life. I feel like I spent all this wasted money on the shittiest part of my life and now I have to keep paying for it during the best years I've ever had. it fucking sucks.

but that's what I get for being irresponsible. and I still am. I don't know if that's a lesson I will ever actually learn. I think JP having this job will really help me spend less. it's just so hard to get to know someone when you have no place to go.

and let's be honest, my time is running out.

:: 2016 2 August :: 7.30pm

between Thursday and Sunday I drove 1200 miles. that is the longest I've driven in such a short period of time.

I definitely could never be a truck driver. too much.

but I will say, the trip was totally worth it. I love the ocean. and the beach. how very small it makes you feel.

and some of those twisty roads were super fun. I would love to be a rally car driver.

:: 2016 30 July :: 4.30pm

I just wanna be home in my own bed with my own puppies. I am so over driving.

:: 2016 29 July :: 6.08am

It is such a mysterious place, the land of tears...

:: 2016 27 July :: 10.17pm

I'm alive. I'm okay. You haven't beat me. I feel good, all be it tired.

Just gonna be myself for as long as I can.

2 props | give me props

:: 2016 27 July :: 7.33am

final day of the elimination diet/cleanse. I have learned a few things:

1 I will never be vegan
2 I am not allergic to foods
3 I feel bad no matter what I eat
4 vegans are crazy

tonight I will be in Leavenworth with my Emily! tomorrow... THE OCEAN

:: 2016 25 July :: 10.13pm

Maybe having faith in people is okay. Maybe I should believe that things will turn out well.

Somewhere along the way I lost sight of what really matters. Love and positivity and hope.

Life is beautiful and people can try and ruin it but despite their trying, they can't change that.