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Il n'y a pas de crainte dans l'amour

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godessalthena

:: 2016 11 June :: 2.43pm

it's like a constant reminder of how broken I am..

why did so much bullshit happen to me?

why was I such a victim?

and why am I still paying for it now...



klara committed suicide last Sunday.. I can't even begin to fathom that family's pain. how they continue to survive is so deeply moving.

I could never inflict that kind of pain. as much as I hate where I've been and where I'm going, I am so terrified about what's after that this isn't so bad..


I just.. what to know why. and it's something I will never know.





it sucks when the people who have caused you the most damage are the ones who know you best...

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godessalthena

:: 2016 8 June :: 7.18am

visited J's new digs yesterday. have to say I am extremely envious.

it's on a little lake out in Cheney. absolutely picturesque. I saw a heron, a bullocks oriel, and so many red winged black birds. I need to get some binoculars!

she has some goats living out there with her. they were the fuckin cutest. they kept staring up at us in the trailer bleating. they all have unique voices.. there's a screamer and meek one and everything in between!

we watched what about bob and pigged out on junk food. I have the biggest mosquito bite on my forehead, it gets and is making me feel kinda sick, but omg we could not stop laughing. I looked like a unicorn at first. now my face is just deformed and swollen.

going back out on Sunday, can't wait!! I missed the other side of my bestie sammich.

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godessalthena

:: 2016 7 June :: 9.18am
:: Music: coheed & cambria

pull the trigger and the night mare stops

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godessalthena

:: 2016 2 June :: 12.01pm

yesterday was my 6 year work anniversary.

me, Samie, Torie, Zuzu, Morgan and Juan all had sushi at sushi.com.

Juan brought me some cupcakes from a local bakery.

we went to the Monterey, it was me Torie Samie Chris and Juan, we ran into Raymond and it was a nice low key time.

today I left work early.

it's so insane. 6 years has flown by.

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godessalthena

:: 2016 28 May :: 9.27pm

there's just somethin in the way he laps my tears away

the concerned look the warm tongue

cuddles and kisses, just what the dr ordered

I love Bjorne. I wouldn't give him up. not for everything in the whole world

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godessalthena

:: 2016 28 May :: 8.35pm

how can I trust you when I can't even trust myself

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godessalthena

:: 2016 24 May :: 10.01pm

Juan like my belches because they are deep and full

Ashley likes the sound of my voice because it is soothing

I reeeeeally hope Juan and I start a pod cast.

it would be how you say uh-maze

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godessalthena

:: 2016 23 May :: 10.20am

why ARE there so many songs about rainbows and what's on the other side?

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godessalthena

:: 2016 17 May :: 10.06pm

loyal dog met my parents today and spent time in my home on my couch watching my tv and enjoying my world and it was

simply

the most MAGICAL thing


he made me a mix cd every song was love and passion


we checked out guitars and he fell in love
everything just fell just right just where it belonged






am I an animal in a cage?

if I am, do I even care?

he feels like home, and all I want to do is come to him.

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godessalthena

:: 2016 14 May :: 2.39pm

a muse is a beautiful thing

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godessalthena

:: 2016 13 May :: 6.04am

got my eyebrows done for the first time in over a year....

and god damn do they feel strange.. but they are also on fleek.

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godessalthena

:: 2016 8 May :: 8.39am

I don't particularly believe in souls, spirits, ghosts, etc..

but I sure do see them often.

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godessalthena

:: 2016 7 May :: 8.30am

the best thing about my man is its like dating John Mayer B B King Prince Mac Demarco and Snow Patrol all at the same time

I feel so vital

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godessalthena

:: 2016 5 May :: 2.29pm

comparison will always beget misery.

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godessalthena

:: 2016 1 May :: 2.05am

so drunk


punk/street kid life


not for fucking me

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godessalthena

:: 2016 29 April :: 8.17pm

even though I fucking hate driving being in my car is the only place I feel completely at home

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godessalthena

:: 2016 29 April :: 6.06pm

I know it's a little late, but happy birthday grandpa. I miss you so so much.

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godessalthena

:: 2016 26 April :: 6.46am

I wake up every morning exhausted with ridiculous tummy cramps. I make at least 3 browns every morning. I think I'm dying.

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godessalthena

:: 2016 23 April :: 8.51am

he is my Juan and only <3

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godessalthena

:: 2016 23 April :: 7.49am

do men experience emotions differently from a woman because we are different or because society tells us we are..?

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