thedarkerside
|
::
2004 28 March :: 8.06pm
"Face To Face"
Don't tell me now with a smile on your face
That you're lost...down and out
When there was nothing left in me
You can't stop fuckin' with my head
Stop fuckin' with my head
My silence you break
The smile that you fake (you fake)
There's not one thing that you can say to make it right
Unless you say "I'm leavin"
And if you're not...then please tell me why
Please tell me why you can't
Save face
Say it to my face
Can I take all the filth in your head
All the words that you said (that you said)
And throw it away (throw it out)
You can't stop fuckin' with my head
Stop fuckin' with my head
My silence you break
The smile that you take away
There's not one thing that you can say to make it right
Unless you say "I'm leavin"
And if you're not...then please tell me why
Please tell me why you can't
That shit you're talkin' don't mean nothing to me anymore
Limp dick...you fuck stick...let's settle the score
Run and hide you know I'll find you anywhere
Motherfucker...two faced prick with hell to pay
What's real is real...it's time to step up to the plate again
Swing batter-batter, swing batter-batter, swing...
What's real is real...it's time to step up to the plate again
Swing batter-batter...fucked me for the last time!
Just take a swing...
C'mon...you should've taken that swing...
Just take your swing...
There's not one thing that you can say to make it right
Unless you say "I'm leavin"
And if you're not...then please tell me why
Please tell me why you can't
Swing...just take your swing...fuck you!
Just take your swing...
You can't stop fuckin' with my head
Stop fuckin' with my head
take a stab
|
|
thedarkerside
|
::
2004 25 March :: 5.48pm
I'm tired. And Scared. And Undecided.
take a stab
|
|
thedarkerside
|
::
2004 24 March :: 8.40pm
I wrote some kick ass poems for English, I will type them in when I get them back.
take a stab
|
|
thedarkerside
|
::
2004 21 March :: 4.23pm
"She grasped her throat holding in the air realizing that this would be the last day she breathed.."
I find it more than strange how big of an influence people can have on another single person. They can do anything from making your life hell to making you feel like you have the greatest uphold of self confidence that you ever thought could have existed. People need people to survive. It's as simple as that. Even though solitary confienment doesn't sound too bad at the moment to some people including myself. Although I will never understand the never ending "food chain" type effect on people. You go to school essentially to learn, but then as you get older its more than that learning becomes a bore and ofcourse people will make things for their own fun and pleasure like groups and then all your steriotypes. It's obviously bound to happen. Then you graduate and think your done with the shit you have to go through such as pretending to be who you arent, going anorexic just to fit in, not liking people because your friends don't, etc. But then you go to college and it only more of ass kissing and working your ass off. You graduate from college then if you get a normal job you do more asskissing for the rest of your life just so you can support your family. I don't want to live like that. Millions of people don't want to live like that, but they do. But this is where it stops for me. I am going to make it my lifes goal to be employed by myself. Whether it's anything from writing, painting,drawing,interior designing, fashion design or just anything that I can do that will make money for myself and only for myself. I don't want to repeat the mistakes most parents make. Having a family before they even know if they can support them or not and that I think is selfish. Don't have kids unless you know you can provide them with a good life. Suicide is one of the leading causes for death. And I'm guessing some of the reason is family life and how much it sucks these days. Don't be an asshole parent who tries to be more civilized about how to punish and only punish than trying to actually understand. People drive me crazy.
take a stab
|
rachelle
|
::
2004 20 March :: 6.47pm
this week was long and painful....and it got me into about 6 more long and painful weeks.
wooo! jv soccer, here i come!
my sister and i had a bsb reunion today.
we listned to every song the backstreet boys ever recorded. wow. bsb for always!
random Q & A:
Question: What would you wear if you were standing in front of a fire squad ready to assume your execution?
Answer: A bullet proof vest.
10 made me bleed |
take a stab
|
Tbaby92588
|
::
2004 20 March :: 12.46pm
:: Mood: thirsty
:: Music: Pavement Cracks [Annie Lennox]
I'm in love. Love...
..It seemed like it was going to rain for a while.
I'm being litteral, too. Did you see the skies?
2 made me bleed |
take a stab
|
|
thedarkerside
|
::
2004 18 March :: 6.42pm
There are many things in life that scare me, I'm afraid to be afraid. What if I'm not as smart as I thought I was? How to things such as objects, people, or places have such a strong effect on my mind and emotions? I know I will die never understanding life in it self or even in a nuttshell and I think no one ever will. But why do I put myself in that position to be the one to figure out life? It will always be an on going mission to me. I think I know what I want out of life and what I want to do. I want to become a writer. I want people to get excited everytime they hear a new book by "Amy" is coming out soon. I want people to read my words...every single word that was once a thought in my head and to make my words and my thoughts become apart of them, become a part of the reader. I want to feel like I can live my life loving what I do.
I'm tired of writing entries complaining about things. I think I've made it pretty clear my living situations are hell and that all these things in my head are hell. I want this woohu to be different, different from all the rest. I dont want it to be about my day. I dont want it to be about how i feel. I want it to be about the things I think about that have no relation to anything else in my life. And that I shall do. Starting really soon, like possibly tomorrow.
Until then.
1 made me bleed |
take a stab
|
|
thedarkerside
|
::
2004 10 March :: 7.29pm
:: Mood: aggravated
:: Music: Blindside- Endings
Another OK day..I think
Welll, Its not good to start your day off with Spanish for many reasons. Who can understand that shit early in the morning anyway? How do you free write a 100 word essay in all spanish at like...7:45 in the morning? I don't know but I got over 200 words crazy enough. Wrote a story ending up having to do with Ricardo y Susan va a manejar al mercado. What an interesting story. They both ended up comprar un hamburgesa lol, hey I was hungry at the time I couldn't help it. Mucho hambre.
Math was better, even though I have like a 58% in that class. Hey pretty soon it will be a D- and thats all I care about its one step closer to just a C. Then Kyle and I gave 3 dollars to muscle distrophy just so we could get shamrocks to put funny stuff on, one said WHAT and the one next to it said WHAT and the last one said OKAYYY(lol lil jon from the dave chappelle show) We taped them up above Nick Funk's locker lol. After we went over a new lesson and got homework assigned Kyle came back and sat on the floor by my desk so we could chill (since I got moved from behind him lastweek for talking too much).
English we revied for the HUGE ass mythology test we have tomorrow that I WILL study for trust me. I have an A in that class I dont want to ruin it. Plus, English is my favvvvvorite subject right now. We got done watchin The Oddysee the "made for tv movie" Hell yeah Tellemicus looked hot in a loin cloth. Lunch was ...lunch.. Then science was..science... Gym..was gym
Design was fun, I like that class because I get more time to hang out with Carinna and Samara. It's just a good class to end your day off with.
Went to champion after school. I saw Steph, Frank, Kyle, Brittney Dixon, and David. I was waiting for a machine and I turned my head and looked around and it was weird my eyes locked on Ryan and it scared the shit out of me. I think Wallace is taking this whole "sneak attack" thing to a new level. LOL stalker
x DrAGoNregina x: he doesnt like girls lol
Crazy BaBy101388: nothin wrong with tappin a gay guy
Crazy BaBy101388: LOL
I'm out, long ass entry today.
Later
take a stab
|
|
thedarkerside
|
::
2004 9 March :: 8.08pm
Well, ofcourse I didn't end up doing my homework lastnight so I did it in the morning. I always look up because you can hear people coming/ going by when your sitting in the halls and I looked up and the first time it was Ryan trying to sneak attack me but the second time it was *heavenly noises* ******. lol he>always looks at me I swear! I always pass him in the hall and he'll stare at me and on my way to design today I thought hey, I always get here early maybe I'll act slow to see if I'll see ****** and I turn around and he was walking behind me staring at me, yeah I tried hard not to laugh lol God damn he is fiinnnne. I've said like one word to him..but hey, we might have classes together next year or something.
Gym was ok actually all we did was Tae Bo. Fun stuff with Billy Blanks and his man boobs and spandex outfits. Ew. It made gym go by faster. Oh and I'm starting to looovvee english because it is so damn hillarious because of David, Taylor, Tom, and Pat. We have a student teacher in there and the whole time Dave was like pulling a dave chappelle on her like going WHATTT WHATT WHATTT WHATT WHATTT? after everything she said and hes like OOKKAYYYYY lol God I love the chappelle show. I'm hoping the kid who sides infromt of me will be gone so ****** can sit in front of me, hes pretty hot. He always plays with my hair..scary enough as that is..lol Then we got on a sex topic in Design because the paper mache looks like "jiz". An ofcourse this conversation had to take place without my girl Samarah, god she would have made it so funny! Anyways, Jake for some odd reason got on the topic of orgasms? How I dont know but hes all like "you know you like to fake them" I'm like what the hell do you even know what that means lol This year so far has been quite interesting. Everything we talk about leads to sex which is a good thing -winik-
I'm out, but like carinna would say, "Usher makes me cream my panties" lol god that girl cracks me up
1 made me bleed |
take a stab
|
|
thedarkerside
|
::
2004 7 March :: 5.44pm
:: Mood: amused
Yesterday was fun...I woke up and went tanninggg which is always nice, then later went grocery shopping..
When I got home Carinna had called so I called her back and I ended up going to her place to spend the night there with Arie too.
We talked to Zach online and persuaded him to come over with guilt lol. Yadda Yadda Yaddaa he came over we watched the Matrix Reloaded which was an ok movie even though I fell asleep in the beginning and like drooled alittle on myself, needless to say, I'm not a big matrix fan.
Her parents came home, zach left, we went to bed, good times. Woke up ate doughnut then my dad picked me up. So I got home went tanning and then...took a shower..
Now i'm workin on my laundry. Fun
I hate school. I hope we get that freak inferno tomorrow and the school gets burnt to the ground
take a stab
|
|