life
This song has always stood out to me.

The strands in your eyes that color them wonderful • Stop me and steal my breath • Emeralds from mountains thrust towards the sky • Never revealing their depth • Tell me that we belong together • Dress it up with the trappings of love • I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips • Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above • Chorus:I'll Be your cryin' shoulder • I'll Be love suicide • I'll Be better when I'm older • I'll Be the greatest fan of your life • Rain falls angry on the tin roof • As we lie awake in my bed • You're My Survival, You're My Living Proof • My love is alive and not dead • Tell me that we belong together • Dress it up with the trappings of love • I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips • Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above • Chorus • I've dropped out, burned up, fought my way back from the dead • Tuned in, turned on, remembered the things you said • I'll Be your cryin' shoulder • I'll Be lovesuicide • I'll Be better when I'm older • I'll Be the greatest fan of your life

Just thought i would throw that in because it really means somethin to me. We lost again so now our record is 5 and 2 oh well. Hmm well thats all i really have to say.
love ben

life
Well today was meh... I went to the basketball game and megan came with me and we hung out and it was cool because i haven't hung out with her in what seems like an eternity. She was upset and she started crying and felt like the worst friend ever i can't stand to see someone crying especially someone i love as much as her. So started doin everything i could just to make her smile so i tryed everything and it did make her smile and laugh then we started cuddlin again and lacin our fingers and everything went crazy nothing hurt anymore and i got pulled back in. I know i'm fine i don't need her but its just i love her and well its just kind of wierd right now. Well i hope all this is a sign or somethin like that, because i love her so much and i want to make her happy. I also want to help cherie i want her to be happy so badly shes always been there for me and i don't want to let her down. Well i don't know what else to say i'm in pain, loving, and more confused than when i looked at a triganometry book.
love you all alot

hockey
Well i just got home from hockey and we won wich was cool because we are a jv team and we just beat a varsity team. My mom freaked out at the end because i over dosed on my inhaler and my heart rate was so fast no one could tell what it was just that it was over 180 so i can add that to my list of how i almost died.
love ben

life
Well haven't written in here in a while. Today me and megan really talk for the first time in months and its great that she knows how much i love her and that she can still talk to me. Its all still on my mind even though it happened months ago its all burned into my mind, Don't get me wrong i'm fine now its just still there. She even apologized to me wich i didn't get she has nothing to apologize for, i should have thanked her for the happiness she gave me before that i couldn't remember the last time i was happy. I'm glad that we are still friends even though i will never hold her the way i once did i'm glad i can still love her as my friend.

life
Christmas break started 8 hours and 19 minutes ago woohu this is just great i'm bored. Not much to say so merry christmas everyone.
love ben