Life Is An Ever Changing Road

:: 2008 10 November :: 2.50pm

:: 2008 10 November :: 2.10am
:: Music: hank williams tear in my beer

1:
Theres a tear in my beer
cause Im cryin for you,
Dear you are on my lonely mind.
Into these last nine beers
I have shed a million tears.
You are on my lonely mind
Im gonna keep on sittin here
Until Im petriified.
And then maybe these tears
Will leave my eyes.
Theres a tear in my beer
cause Im crying for you, dear
You are on my lonely mind.

2:
Last night I walked the floor
And the night before
You are on my lonely mind.
It seems my life is through
And Im so doggone blue
You are on my lonely mind.
Im gonna keep on sittin here
Till I cant move a toe
And then maybe my heart
Wont hurt me so.
Theres a tear in my beer
cause Im cryin for you, dear.
You are on my lonely mind.

3
Lord, Ive tried and Ive tried
But my tears I cant hide
You are (were? ) on my lonely mind.
All these blues that Ive found
Have really got me down
You are on my lonely mind
Im gonna keep on drinkin till I cant even think
Cause in the last week I aint slept a wink
Theres a tear in my beer
Cause Im crying for you dear
You are on my lonely mind.

rayray

:: 2008 9 November :: 11.15am

I feel like I have a lot of emotion to pour out.
But I don't know how to put a lot of it into words.
It's been so long since I have vented any of my emotions.
I think that its because Im gradually getting better at telling Mike how I feel instead of bottling it up, and then just lashing out at him the next time he pisses me off.
Its kind of pathetic that after 3 years I still have a hard time telling him how I feel about certain things.
Most the time I am just trying to spare him the hurt, because I am a harsh bitter person.
I used to blame his daughter for every little thing, and I'd hide out in the bedroom when she'd come over.
But I've overcome that, and I think that I am even coming around to the thought of having kids eventually.

I think I'm growing up..

:: 2008 8 November :: 1.41am

I've no idea where I stand right now.

7 laughs | smile

:: 2008 5 November :: 11.59pm

i thought the pornstar's husband was going to rat everyone out.

FUCKING CLASSIC!!!

rayray

:: 2008 4 November :: 9.11am

So I've basically spent the last day and a half in bed..
I made an attempt at work yesterday. I felt perfectly fine, then all of a sudden I'm sweating profusely, feeling like I am going to vomit, and then I passed out.
I've been shakey, cold, then extremely hot.
The littlest movement makes my head throb so bad I start balling.
My head hurts even more when the lights are on.

I feel like ass, and look just as worse.

My sister, Derrick, and Seth are coming up in a couple of weeks.
Im really excited about that because I miss them all..

angel_bob

:: 2008 4 November :: 12.35am

Vote tomorrow, bitches.

sugarjackj

:: 2008 3 November :: 5.18pm

Goodbye. Nice to know you.

sugarjackj

:: 2008 3 November :: 4.35pm

I�m not sure what it�s all for.

It�s getting harder to even find a purpose in life.

:: 2008 31 October :: 1.17am

FYI: my turds are tapered.

also, i bowled a 163, 149, and 169 tonight.

my average is 147

:: 2008 30 October :: 4.18pm

You have confirmed your interview schedule on 11/6/2008 at 4:00 PM. Please report to the HR office at Sears Auto Center. For more information, please call 6162857721.

4 laughs | smile

:: 2008 27 October :: 11.37am

the sun came out today.

:: 2008 27 October :: 5.46am

All my eggs are now in one basket.

Chapter 2: the beginning.

:: 2008 26 October :: 9.54pm

Its hard to forgive what happened.

Its also hard to lose a friend that close.

what to do?

:: 2008 26 October :: 3.52pm
:: Music: blink 182 - always

for once, i'm enjoying the rain

:: 2008 26 October :: 1.19pm

it really sucks losing sombody i was that close with, Its not worth my pain for that though.

also, with all the depressing entry's lately, i bring you ken, the lawn jockey

angel_bob

:: 2008 25 October :: 10.41pm

Did I tell you I updated my ~~law blog~~ photoblog?

Because I did.

:: 2008 25 October :: 4.11am
:: Mood: numb

"regret nothing, Live every day as if it we're your last"
Since red flannel I've learned alot about myself, alot more than I care to know.

I know now that I try and change myself to fit in with someone else.
I know what its like to say "I love you" and truly mean it
I have cried, I don't do that ever.
I have driven to points where I feel nothing at all, then I cut myself just to see if pain even exists, it doesn't.
I have compleatly handed my heart to someone
who had no idea what to do with it, and later crushed it.

I knew what I was getting into, she warned me, told me not to do it.
I've also learned to listen.
I've learned lies hurt more than the truth.

In the past month, I've felt the best I ever have in life, I feel the worst I ever have right now.

This girl has driven me to do things I've never considered ever before, I wish I could put into words the way I'm feeling now.

flexeril can't even take these feelings away.

When the time comes, just remember.
"Regret nothing and live every day as if its your last."

Erin Marie Crisp,

Again, I've never been as sorry as I am now about how much i hurt you.
again I'm sorry.

Justin McW,
You we're right, my knife is definatally not sharp enough.

:: 2008 22 October :: 11.28pm

Sons of Anarchy
so far on SoA i've recognized 2 songs

clutch - can't stop progress
Dropkick murphys - johnny i hardly knew ya

jax is a badass, plain and simple, throwing a guy through a glass door last week, then this week shooting him in the head.

also gemma's friend had a good one liner "six years of taking two in the ass while a teenager cums on
my face!"

rayray

:: 2008 22 October :: 6.16pm

So after a lot of discussing, we have highly considered moving to Wyoming..
The final decision isn't going to be up to me, because I am not the one that has a child.
Also, we are looking at getting an english bulldog puppy.
Im still waiting for my civil service date.
And at this rate, I don't think I am going to get in to take it until december.

jedibumblebee

:: 2008 20 October :: 7.43pm

I want to ask you
Do you ever sit and wonder
It's so strange
That we could be together for so long
And never know, never care
What goes on in the other one's head
Things I've felt but I never said
You said things that I never said
So I'll say something that I should have said long ago

You don't know me
You don't know me at all
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
(At all...)

You could have just propped me up on the table like a mannequin
Or a cardboard stand up and paint me (paint me anything)
Any face that you wanted me to be
See, we're damned by the existential moment
Where we saw the couple in the coma
And it was we who were the cliche
But we carried on anyway
So sure I can just close my eyes
Yeah, sure, trace and memorize
But can you go back once you know?

You don't know me
You don't know me at all
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
(At all...)

You don't know me
You don't know me at all
You don't know me
You don't know me

If I'm the person that you think I am (Ahh....)
Clueless chump you seem to think I am (Ahh...)
So easily led astray, an errant dog who occasionally escapes and needs a shorter leash then
Why the fuck would you want me back?
Maybe it's because...

You don't know me at all
(Ahhhh, ahh...)
You don't know me, you don't know me
(Ahhhh, ahh...)

So what I'm trying to say is
What I'm trying to tell you is not going to come out like I want to say it
Cause I know you'll only change it
Say it

You don't know me
You don't know me at all
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
(At all...)

You don't know me
You don't know me at all
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
(At all!)

What?

:: 2008 19 October :: 11.11pm
:: Music: weigh on my mind - the transplants

I've made the decision to stop drinking so much, also i need to get some shit straightened out in my life.

and i bring some lyrics,

Read more..

m&ms487

:: 2008 21 October :: 10.50pm

Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one laughing, the only one aware. I just can't shake the feeling that sometimes I see things in a way that no one else can even comprehend.

Central won against Western. For those of you who don't know, it's a big deal. There are five state troopers parked about two hundred yards away from my apartment to keep things "under control." This is probably the quietest Saturday night of the year as of yet.

:: 2008 18 October :: 3.28am
:: Mood: high

i see it, i wonder if they do too.

:: 2008 16 October :: 10.29pm

bowled a 102, 180, and 152. i'm feeling good.

:: 2008 16 October :: 4.26pm
:: Mood: accomplished

feeling great right now.
truck is in my driveway, hoodlatch is fixed, needs an oil change though, also needs the steering shaft u-joint or whatever, it kind of wanders.

I get to bowl tonight and i'm going to kick ass at it, fuck yeah!

angel_bob

:: 2008 16 October :: 2.34pm
:: Music: Sons and Daughters

To everyone who will never see this:
(This isn't about you. If you think it's about you, it's not. It's about a certain vous.)

Not everyone's religion is your religion. You can't just push your views on me and I can't just push my views on you.

I believe in God. But my god seems to be a little nicer than your god. And if that makes me wrong, or a heathen or whatever, I don't care. I'm living in a happy, nice world with a happy, nice God who loves everyone, where free will means free happiness and where people are happy and love each other. If that's not a world you like, that's fine because it's my world. And I'm happy here.

I just don't understand why anyone would want people to not be happy.

I don't understand how what you do makes you happy. Does judging others make you feel better? Does alienating your friends and family make you happy? If it does, then that's fine. I'd only ever want you to be happy. But if it doesn't? Why do you keep doing it?

I love you all.

5 laughs | smile

:: 2008 16 October :: 2.49am

in my attempts to understand others, i still don't understand myself.

I wonder if I'll ever know exactly who I am.

m&ms487

:: 2008 15 October :: 4.25pm

I am withdrawing from chemistry. It is going to make me a happier person.

I'm taking French and three literary theory classes next semester. Probably.

:: 2008 14 October :: 6.39pm

alright,

truck just needs plates to drive now, insurance is transfered, brake lights didn't work, fixed those.

need to get the hood latch to work now, change the fluids, and i'll be good to go.