Fell in Love with a Boy...
Ok, so I LOVE this song...it is a cover of the White Stripes "fell in love with a girl" and it totally rocks my face!

I wish i had somewhere to go...I wanna get all gussied up and go shake my groove thang...haha...

You know how something small can happen that sparks something much bigger? Well that drives me crazy. something that could be thought of as small and insignificant can totally turn a peson's world upside down...and you never even see it coming...

you say it looks as though i might give up this fight...
I just talked to lindsay for soooo long. I t had been forever since we talked and as usual she talked a great deal more than i did, which might surprise anyoe who doesn know her since i talk A LOT, but for those of you who do know her, you know what i am talkin about....she talked about herself, and her boy drama, which is never ending...yikes...

Ok so i have no idea were these stupid funks come from, but they freakin SUCk....i hate being sad...I thought about Nay May today, maybe if he had a car he would take me to see Annie and Kasue...i need to get away from here...i am going to go insane if something doesnt change soon...

"It is cold, I want you to be here with me, to wrap your arms around me and give your warmth for us to share/I want to be enveloped in your scent, and carried away in the deep glistening ocean of your eyes/ somewhere that i wont be cold anymore"

"when it starts raining, i think of you/i think of you smiling at me/as the water trickles down your face and drips off your eyelashes/when lightning flashes i think of you/ i think of your eyes dancing as your face lights up/and suddenly it is dark again/when thunder rumbles i think of you/ i think of you walking away to the sound of my heart breaking"

You'll say don't fear your dreams,its easier than it seems/you'll say you'd never let me fall from hopes so high
so i am frusterated, but it is all internal....i grrrr myself by doing stupid crap, and hurting people in the process. I dont mean to do it, but i dont think beforehand, and then afterward try to justify. I am frusterated because i keep doing the same things over and over...i need to learn the lesson the first time. Grrr

i am afraid i have really messed some things up, and i dont know what to do....where do i go from here? If i could rewind i would seriously consider it. I heart everyone, and i just hope everyone knows it...

I analyze things too much, i know this, but when i do something and the person acts totally different afterwards, it is a little unsettling...it probably has nothing to do with me, but i am way to anxiety ridden to deal well with this crap.

this is such a pointless entry, not to menton repetetive...so i just want to say sorry to anyone who has no idea what i am talkin about yet still read this far...i heart you for caring...:)

Would you rather be an African elephant or an Asian elephant? Why?:	i dont really wanna be an elephant at all
Would you rather freeze to death or burn alive? Why?:	hmmm...i guess whichever would be less painful
Name three movies you like:	Say Anything, Underworld, Bend it like Beckham
Name three books you like:	The Princess Diaries, Lord of the Rings, On a Pale Horse
Have you ever fallen in love with a fictional character? Which one(s)? Why?:	Yes, Lloyd Dobbler
Republican, Democrat or other? Why?:	mostly liberal, but i dont like to to be resticted
Attendance percentage at high school dances?:	I went to all except junior Prom
What television shows do you watch regularly?:	the OC, That 70s show, Gilmore girls, One Tree Hill
Abortion is...:	a good option to have available, if you dont like it dont have one
The death penalty is...:	a good option to have, if you dont like it dont break the law
How do you take your coffee?:	however it comes to me...it is best with flavored creamer, no sugar
How do you take your tea?:	milk and honey
Who's your favorite teacher/professor?:	J-Smith, Lope-daddy, and Mr. Lloyd, from HS
How do you feel about your parents?:	Ehhh
What sort of music do you listen to?:	Me gustan muchos tipos de musica
List five or ten bands you listen to.:	silverchair, dashboard, fiona apple, the strokes, lit, actually i listen to a lot of soundtracks...
Do you use public transportation?:	yes
Ever told someone you love him/her?:	yes, I think sometimes people need to know that they are loved and what better way than to tell them....
Morning person, night person or both?:	night, but i do my h-dub in the mornin...so both i guess
Siblings?:	3 half, 3 step
What are your friends like?:	they are my friends....what am i gonna say...they suck?...no...they rock
Amusement parks are?:	Awesome
Cafeterias are?:	where i get my food
Dogs are?:	great
Any phobias, traumas or other weirdnesses?:	dinosuars, heights, i dont really like feet...um i am real weird, but i cant really pinpoint my specific weirdnesses...

The Personality Resume brought to you by BZOINK!

Your Ultimate Purity Score Is...
Category	Your Score	Average
Self-Lovin'	80% Never taken out of the packaging	65%
Shamelessness	76.2% Has yet to see self in mirror	79.3%
Sex Drive	94.7% The Pope is envious	77.7%
Straightness	85.7% Just go fuck something, okay?	44.8%
Gayness	96.4% Repressed, are we?	83.5%
Fucking Sick	93.8% Refreshingly normal	89.9%
You are 85.17% pure Average Score: 72.6%
Take The Ultimate Purity Test and see how you match up!

Now that I've lost everything to you
You say you wanna start something new
And it's breakin' my heart you're leavin'
Baby, I'm grievin'
But if you wanna leave, take good care
I hope you have a lot of nice things to wear
But then a lot of nice things turn bad out there

Oh, baby, baby, it's a wild world
It's hard to get by just upon a smile
Oh, baby, baby, it's a wild world
I'll always remember you like a child, girl

You know I've seen a lot of what the world can do
And it's breakin' my heart in two
Because I never wanna see you a sad girl
Don't be a bad girl
But if you wanna leave, take good care
I hope you make a lot of nice friends out there
But just remember there's a lot of bad and beware

Oh, baby, baby, it's a wild world
It's hard to get by just upon a smile
Oh, baby, baby, it's a wild world
I'll always remember you like a child, girl

Baby, I love you
But if you wanna leave, take good care
I hope you make a lot of nice friends out there
But just remember there's a lot of bad and beware

Oh, baby, baby, it's a wild world
It's hard to get by just upon a smile
Oh, baby, baby, it's a wild world
I'll always remember you like a child, girl

Its hard to get by just upon a smile
I got all my crap done this week, but i am glad it is the weekend. Have a lot of errands to run today.

1.)sign lease
2.)Blockbuster to drop off movies
3.)YWCA to drop off application
4.)Goodwill
5.)BestBuy (but only if we go to Westnedge)

Ok, so I LOVE this song! I am SUCH a dork...

I know what you were saying about a song giving you the little butterfies in your tummy. this one makes me feel like that one guy just smiles at me...awww i LOVE it!!!

I heart you all and i hope to see you soon1

what about sex/what about me/what about sex with me
i got my spanish paper done, but now i have to pull a service learning paper out of thin air...yay fun

I wish i could see my posse this weekend...i miss them...especially since megan is gonna be gone all weekend...but actually i just wanna have a real fun time...i need to get my mind off the bad stuff and put some good thoughts in my head...

I am such a follower...but sometimes other people have really good ideas!

Last Cigarette::	2 years
Last Alcoholic Drink::	A week...before that...November
Last Car Ride::	cockmobile
Last Kiss::	never
Last Good Cry::	well i wouldn't call it good, but Saturday
Last Library Book checked out::	Can't Remember
Last Movie Seen in Theatres::	Win A Date with Tad Hamilton...SO cute!
Last Book Read::	All-American Girl
Last Movie Rented::	Can't Buy Me Love, Better Off Dead
Last Cuss Word Uttered::	oh fuck it is cold
Last Beverage Drank::	water
Last Food Consumed::	caf crap
Last Crush::	guy from Spanish
Last Phone Call::	recieved...Jason? Made...home?
Last TV Show Watched::	American Idol...last night
Last Time Showered::	yesterday
Last Shoes Worn::	brown boots
Last CD Played::	Silverchair-neon ballroom
Last Item Bought::	peircing?
Last Download::	pictures
Last Annoyance::	Stupid retarded woman at leasing office
Last Disappointment::	stupidhead Ryan not emailing me back
Last Soda Drank::	Coke
Last Thing Written::	Journal for english
Last Key Used::	swiped my card to get into the building
Last Word Spoken::	awwww
Last Sleep::	My bed
Last IM::	BT
Last Sexual Fantasy::	Concert...drummer...owow
Last Weird Encounter::	Luke in spanish today
Last Ice Cream Eaten::	vanilla at lunch
Last Time Amused::	brushing off and pushing out the cockmobile
Last Time Wanting To Die::	Sunday
Last Time In Love::	never
Last Time Hugged::	Just now...steve
Last Time Scolded::	Yesterday...Max
Last Time Resentful::	Last night...Megan
Last Chair Sat In::	My Computer chair
Last Lipstick Used::	never...lipbalm...today
Last Underwear Worn::	Purple...stars on front...celebrity across the ass
Last Bra Worn::	beige
Last Shirt Worn::	purple "dont mess with texas"
Last Webpage Visited::	www.woohu.com

"Last" Survey brought to you by BZOINK!

I wanna rock and roll this party/I still wanna have some fun/I wann leave you felling breathless/show you how the west was won
Well, last night i watched Just married with Ricci and Megan...it was weird to hng out with megan and another person in out room, but it all worked out...i liked the movie, but i didnt think it deserved all the raves that i heard about it...oh well...

I got up at 8 and started writing my journals for English...but then i came back to get ready to go to class and i saw that my teacher has emailed me...NO CLASS!!!...so awesome...now i only have class 12-1 and 4-515....yay...

So we are gonna sign leases today...yay...i think it will be awesome to live with you guys...EXaCTLY like a slumber party with walk-in closets...hehe

I hope my girls can come see me soon...i miss you guys...you are the only people from HS (except my max) that i still talk to...wow that is weird to say...hmmm...summer is gonna be real weird...oh well there are more pressing issues...like springbreak...or even this weekend...

Last night i was asked about my prospects...but maybe you should give me some ideas as well...i need as many posibilities as possible...

OH YEAH!!!
This weekend on saturday Julius bragg and Molly are paying at the Club Soda...any takers...literally...

Well My piercing hurts like a little mother, but it will all be SO worth it cuz i LOVE it...I told my grandpa and grandma today...lets just say they did not seem excited...oh well...they wont have to see it that much, since i will have to wear a retainer all summer cuz of work...

I dont know what max is gonna think of this, but i have other prospects if he doeant like it, cuz there are plenty of fish in the sea...
so i am real excited about our apartment...it is gonna kick ass!

Jason's entry reminds me I need something to do over springbreak...hmmm...any suggestionas anyone?

Oh and my last entry had the poem from 10 things i hate about you in it...it wasnt a song...

By the way Kasue...I HEART YOU!!! I love your new picture...we saw win a date last night....IT WAS AwESOME!!

I am going to leave you with the song i am listening to...it is GREAT!!

Sheryl Crow-I Shall Believe
Come to me now
And lay your hands over me
Even if it's a lie
Say it will be alright
And I shall believe

I'm broken in two
And I know you're on to me
That I only come home
When I'm so all alone
But I do believe

That not everything is gonna be the way
You think it ought to be
It seems like every time I try to make it right
It all comes down on me
Please say honestly you won't give up on me
And I shall believe
And I shall believe

Open the door
And show me your face tonight
I know it's true
No one heals me like you
And you hold the key

Never again
would I turn away from you
I'm so heavy tonight
But your love is alright
And I do believe

That not everything is gonna be the way
You think it ought to be
It seems like every time I try to make it right
It all comes down on me
Please say honestly
You won't give up on me
And I shall believe
I shall believe

Minion....like the meat...its french
I am real excited....i am going to put a hole in my face soon...now, as unappealing as that sounds, i am really happy about it...

I have gotten in a better mood today...he cant hold me down...

I hate the way you talk to me
and the way you cut your hair
i hate the way you drive my car
i hate it when you stare
i hate you big dumb combat boots
and the way you read my mind
i hate you so much it makes me sick
it even makes me rhyme
I hate the way youre always right
i hate it when you lie
i hate it when you make me laugh
even worse when you make me cry
i hate it when you're not around
and that fact that you didnt call
but mostly i hate the way i dont hate you
not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all

you're everywhere to me/ and when i catch my breath its you i breathe
I am still in a fog, but it isnt as dense...

It is nice to to be able to see that I am not alone...

Damn the man! Yay for friends!!!

wake up/ tell me its all right/wake up/ i just wanna hold you tight/wake up/tell me its all right/dont you ever wonder what you're lookin for?
Alright so boys irk me a lot, but i am sorry if i was unfun last night...it most likely did not have anything to do with you, because the people who it had to do with are probably not reading this...

people say i hold too much inside and need to vent, but who am i supposed to vent to? The people i used to count on arent dependable and it is not like i can just pick new best friends...

I put up a big front, but i really miss my caddy gang, i hated being there, but i miss how there was always someone who knew what needed to be said, or not said...

sometimes i just wanna find the person i was before all of the badness and drama...i remember being a good, self-reliant, secure person...i have changed so much that sometimes i dont even recognize myself...

I guess i will just do what i gotta do and hope it gets better...