swimfan14
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2006 26 February :: 5.57pm
:: Mood: Annoyed
The longer I tried denying this, the worse I feel. I've come to realize that pretending I don't hate you isn't making anything better. The truth is, I've never hated anyone more. Sometimes I say that I hate someone when I'm talking to one of my friends and i'll be like "oh yeah I hate him/her" but I never mean it. Things are differen't with you. I truly hate you and nothing will ever change that. I don't feel bad for saying this. You have no idea how much you've ruined things. You're so fucking ungrateful and selfish that I can't even stand it anymore. I seriously hope you choke.
Glad that's all out in the open now.
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swimfan14
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2006 26 February :: 12.37pm
You got your own way of looking at it, I guess that proves that I got mine. It's just who we are.
We've come too far to start over now. I know what you're thinking. I'm not always easy to be around but I do love you. You keep me believing that you love me too and I know it's true. This love drives us crazy but nobody's walking away so I guess we'll have to do it the hard way.
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brokenmentality
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2006 26 February :: 12.03pm
yesterday started out pretty rough.... but fortunately got better.
we went and saw brokeback mountain... it was really good. keegan didnt like it. whatever.
then we went to oasis. that was nice.
and then this morning he wouldnt make me french toast because he has to complain and whine about everything. so i had frozen waffles. i just want to be treated like a princess like other girls. their boyfriends make them breakfast. mine wont even cook.
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jennapie
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2006 25 February :: 12.39pm
In case I haven't mentioned it before.......
I LOVE JAKE MELLEMA!!!
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jennapie
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2006 25 February :: 11.58am
Ya know what? I'm REALLY REALLY bored!! lol
And ya know what else? I think that jealousy is the dumbest thing I've ever had to deal with. It's so pointless, and it's always for no good reason.
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jennapie
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2006 25 February :: 10.57am
Why is it snowing?!
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jennapie
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2006 25 February :: 9.48am
I wanna go camping REALLY bad.
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swimfan14
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2006 24 February :: 11.41pm
Tonight was really good I guess you could say.
First I went to Aarons after school and then we went to the game.
I seen Ryan Case there and I was really happy. I haven't seen him in a while and then I was just walking and someone called my name and I turned and it was Martha and Ashleigh. I was so excited. I haven't seen either of them in over a year now. Martha had a baby named Alex and he's 6 months old and Ashleigh's baby is 5 months old and her name is Haleigh. They both were so cute. I was holding them the whole time.
Oh and so then of course I'm just minding my own business when Sara comes up to me and she either heard Josh saying this to someone or he told her but anyways I guess he was saying how he wanted his cousin to meet me because he has the biggest crush on me and blah blah blah and so Sara said I should go talk to him and I was hell no that's not going to happen. It's too akward for me now. It's fine not knowing if someone has a crush on you and yeah if you have a crush on them then that's perfect but when you don't it just makes things akward and it basically made things 10 time worse when he wrote a fucking SONG about me. I've never had anyone do that before and it's just a little weird esp. since in the song it said "I want to love you forever." Yeah..that's what I said. It's just too much for me and I don't know how he became so in "love" with me since I've never liked him back and i've also never lead him on. He loves me but he doesn't know who I am and of course after the game Aaron and I are walking to my car and Josh is also in the parking lot and he has to make it known that i'm outside so he starts talking really loud so Josh can hear him and look over and see us.... It's just too fucking weird for me. First I get flowers by one boy and now im getting songs by another. It's not really cute unless you actually are dating this person. Now I'm just getting annoyed by this whole thing and I feel bad for complaining about this it's just I need to vent right now and everyone else in the world is sleeping.
Go ahead as you waste your days with thinking. When you fall, everyone stands, and you've had your fill of sinking.
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jennapie
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2006 25 February :: 12.42am
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
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swimfan14
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2006 23 February :: 8.35pm
You know..I can't remember the last time we kissed because you never think the last time is really the last time. You always think there will be more. You think you have forever but you don't. -Greys Anatomy
Yeah so...it's like...I really want to tell you...but then again I don't want you to know.
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swimfan14
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2006 23 February :: 6.23pm
You say we're bitches but we laugh because we knew it way before you did.
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swimfan14
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2006 22 February :: 3.59pm
Take me. Break me. Every mile further there's a part of me that slips away. One day you'll see, even if you got down on your knees you couldn't make me stay.
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brokenmentality
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2006 22 February :: 8.52am
monday keegan and i saw date movie. with out a doubt, that was the dumbest movie i've ever seen in my entire life. we were about ready to walk out of the theater it was so stupid. never in my life can i imagine enjoying such a tasteless classless film as this one. honestly... anyone who dares wasting their money on that movie deserves to be shot. (we used the gift certificates his mom got us for christmas therefore nobody directly spent money on it.... therefore we're safe.... lol) seriously... i just had to update to warn everyone. its not funny, its disgusting... and made me sad for the actors and their now flawed careers.
yesterday i made cupcakes for the break dancers (they have practice every tuesday, thursday and saturday) and i drew little stick figured breakdancers on them with this gel stuff. awww. i shall be known as the crew mom. *giggles because im just the cutest*
hmm.. thats all i suppose.
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jennapie
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2006 21 February :: 8.45pm
hmmm...well I went to the doctor today, and I swear that I had strep because I had white spots all over my throat, but he said I didn't, and pretty much right after I knew that I wasn't sick, I started feeling better......hmmmm....my brain is on crack. Oh well, I hope I stay feeling better, cuz gargling with salt water, makes me gag and shudder and I hate it! ewww!! but Jake went with me to the Dr. and he said that he was feeling better too, since neither one of us has strep throat now. hahaha! We're too cool. AND TODAY, we decided that we were nerds. And we're totally ok with that, well, I am anyways. lol I made him dinner. Well I made him MY faovrite dinner, spaghetti, but he liked it too! and now I'm at work, for about one more hour! then i get to go home, and I don't have class thursday, so tomorrow is like my friday, and Jake does have school, so I don't know what I'm going to do.........I'll think of something. I'll prolly just end up cleaning, but whatever, I'll be home alone, so I won't mind. I might go to Meijer's and buy more film. yea, I'll do that, I just decided. I'm having the best of days..................... I love you Jake!
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swimfan14
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2006 21 February :: 4.23pm
:: Mood: sick
I feel like shit. My lungs feel like they are going to..I don't know, fall out or something if I cough anymore. It's sucky. I hate being sick. Why can't I just be healthy for at least a month straight?
I said I wasn't going to go out tonight because I just stated that I'm sick but I don't want to cancel my plans at the last minute. I'll just go, have a good time, and not complain.
Haha what an akward day for Elyse and I. We never should have told that boy those things. Now he thinks we love him just as much as he loves us. We were only kidding. It was all just for a joke. So now I have to avoid him and when I do run into him, I just have to look the other way.
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