swimfan14
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2006 4 April :: 6.35pm
:: Mood: Confused
Our first little fight.....ahhh..
We could end up broken hearted, if we don't remember why all this started and if they try to tell you that love fades with time, tell them there's no such thing as time.
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brokenmentality
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2006 3 April :: 11.29am
:: Music: Trisha Yearwood: Angels in Waiting
spring break.... boring.. relaxing.. but boring. i asked keegan to get some days off.. but noo.. im alone all week during the day. both my best friends are gone.. so im stuck babysitting.
good news though.. my moms giving me her gand am! woooooo. im so excited. i have to finish paying it off.. but theres only 2 grand left on it. this is my graduation and birthday present. finally i'll have a NICE dependable car. i've ALWAYS loved her car... i really wanted it when i was queen cuz it was red.. lol, but nows good too! as soon as everythings set.. which i think is gonna be tomorrow... i need to start looking for another job. i REALLY wanna work at logans. not just because keegan works there, but because you make more money working there than most other resturants. keegans friend tommy works at Branns and said on a BUSY saturday night he walks out with 130.. but at logans on a busy saturday night servers walk out with around 190. hmmm... pretty big difference there.
i cleaned today... that was my excitement.
OH, my moms getting an Aztec. it's blue and BEAUTIFUL. i dont really like aztecs, but the color seriously makes it like the coolest vehicle ever. its so pretty.
one of the BEST love songs of all time is "hold on to me" by john micheal montgomery. download it. it reminds me SO much of me and keegan. we dont have a song yet though. odd... 17 months and we still dont have one. thats ok, it'll come to us. THATS right... 17 months and breaking up has never even been an option. i think when a relationship turns to an "on and off again" relationship.. its time to end it. because obviously neither person are happy anymore. personal opinion. whatever though... im just so happy. :)
could it be? are there still a few GOOD clingans? i must say... i thought hell must have froze over yesterday. chris is gone, and the rest of his family is FINALLY starting come around and respect my mom. throughout the divorce and even towards the end of their marriage.. the hardest part for me was seeing how my mom was being treated. she's the strongest woman i know. i cant imagine being one of those kids who "hates" their mom. she's the one thing that holds me together.
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swimfan14
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2006 3 April :: 12.30pm
:: Mood: Excited
:: Music: Cascada-Everytime We Touch
I guess I'll update really quick.
Saturday we went to the beach all day and went to all the little shops and then we went to the pool which is an everyday thing for us.
Sunday we went to the pool and then we went to Johns Pass and shopped. It was really pretty there and it is all over the ocean and then we went out to dinner at this resturant on the ocean.
Today we are going out on the boat to go find dolphins and then we have a party to go to later.
There's this little boy named Jake that goes to the pool everyday and he's the cutest little boy ever. I am basically in love with him. I winked at him in the pool and he didn't even know what to do. He just smiled at me. Haha. I shall keep him.
Ahh this weird thing happened yesterday with these two boys that are staying in the same condo as us. I guess I'll explain it later since I'm out of time.
I dig my toes into the sand. The ocean looks like a thousand diamonds strewn across a blue blanket. I lean against the wind, pretend that I am weightless and in this moment I am happy.
I wish you were here
I wish you were here
I wish you were here
I wish you were here.
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brokenmentality
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2006 2 April :: 9.54am
pretty much even tv isnt safe anymore. stupid whore. uhh.
but anyways... yesterday keegan popped his shoulder out of joint again at practice. he picked me up from work and told me and i was like "yeah ok, i know what today is... hahaha" and he's like no really i did... and once again i was like "OK keegan"... but he actually did. poor thing. he brought me home this morning before he went to work, so now he has to carry plates all around and make it even more sore. *sad face* *kisses it to make it ALL better*
after tonight i dont work again until the 12th. woot woot. that'll be nice. washing dishes tonight however WONT be nice. at least i have a respectable job though... not dissing on anyone who works at a fast food restaraunt.. im just glad i can say i work at Metron where i record food acceptance and aid in properly nutritioning diabetics than i flip burgers and drench french fries in grease. its all good... i still hate my job though.
tonights a new desperate housewives AND Flavor of love.. which keegan and i got strangely addicted to because it's so stupid.
friday night keegan took me to disney on ice. it was really cool. we went last year too. we have so much fun at things like that. its wonderful. then we went to coldstone.. because that's simply the perfect end to a perfect date. OH and the BEST ice cream you can get there is (strawberry cheesecake ice cream with strawberries, rasberries, bananas, and pie crust) mmm.
lets see what else... i guess thats it. have a good spring break.
( i miss brandi and stacy... fricken COME HOME! )
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jennapie
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2006 2 April :: 11.37am
Today is 3 Months for Jake and I! and I couldn't be happier....still!!! He is theBEST thing that has ever happened to me. I never knew that it could be like this! I guess I'm luckier than I ever thought! I can't believe how much I love him!!!
I've never been the kind that you'd call lucky
Always stumbling' around in circles
But I must have stumbled into something
Look at me
Am I really alone with you
I wake up feeling like my life's worth living
Can't recall when I last felt that way
Guess it must be all this love you're giving
Never knew never knew it could be like this
But I guess
Some hearts
They just get all the right breaks
Some hearts have the stars on their side
Some hearts,
They just have it so easy
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes
Some hearts just get lucky, lucky sometimes
Now who'd have thought someone like you could love me
You're the last thing my heart expected
Who'd have thought I'd ever find somebody
Someone who someone who makes me feel like this
Well I guess
Some hearts
They just get all the right breaks
Some hearts have the stars on their side, yes
Some hearts,
They just have it so easy
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes
Ohhhhhh
Even hearts like mine
Get lucky, lucky sometimes
Even hearts like mine
Ohhhhhhhh
Some hearts,
They just get all the right breaks
Some hearts have the stars on their side
Some hearts,
They just have it so easy
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes
Some hearts
They just get all the right breaks
Some hearts have the stars on their side, yes
Some hearts,
They just have it so easy
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes
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jennapie
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2006 31 March :: 6.55pm
These are the people that I spend like ALL of my time with! Every single day! HAHA, only....I don't mind!
This is me and my guy whom I love!
This is my boss Sonya! We hang out and party!!!! HAHAHA!
And this is my buddy Laina, who I work with!! Whoo! We have so much fun!
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swimfan14
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2006 31 March :: 2.00pm
:: Mood: Happy
F-L-O-R-I-D-A
Well Lisa and I are here in Florida. It's 84 degrees right now :D.
We sat in first class on our plane. It's pretty much the only way to go. Once you sit in first class, you never want to go back to...half ass class or economy class. Whatever people call it these days. While everyone was getting served peanuts, we were getting served breakfast.
Yesterday we got here really early so we went to the pool most of the day, went shopping, went out to dinner, watched The O.C. (which was very dissapointing by the way.) and then we went to bed.
We just got back from the pool and now we're getting ready because in a while we are going to the pier to go shopping and then out to dinner.
I guess I really don't have anything else to say besides I miss everyone.
much love, ashley
I guess i'll take this really quick. Thanks pie.
Read more..
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swimfan14
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2006 30 March :: 12.53am
Tomorrow=Florida! We just got to our hotel room in Detroit about 20 minutes ago. Our plane leaves VERY early. We'll be in Florida at around 9:00am. We have to get up at 4:00am which is not too far away so I doubt Lisa and I will even go to sleep. We're going to try to stay up. My dad is already sleeping haha..
In other news I guess I was just being paranoid about Aaron and tonight everything worked out like it was supposed to. He was like "seriously Ashley, I ran out to your car after school just so I could see you before you left!"...*smiles*
I hope everyone has a wonderful spring break. Stay safe.
I had quite the time putting my suitcases in the car today...Kelli knows that haha.
Love, Ashley!
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jennapie
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2006 28 March :: 7.10pm
if you're having a bad or stressful day, don't ready this, it won't help.
well, I'm having a pretty bad week. Most of the time I can pin point my bad mood down to a specific event, but this time, I'm having trouble seeing anything that has happened that could have caused this. I guess it's probably just a lot of little things that nobody but me would care about. I don't know, I guess I'm just trying to live up to the standards that I have set for myself and I'm giving myself a really hard time because it's not working out. I'm having trouble in my math class, which, knowing me, is a given, but last semester I got an A, so this is sucking. Then, I got bad news about one of my history books, which, my teacher is a hard ass, so my grade is screwed there, and then my photography class was canceled today, which kind of made me happy cuz I wasn't feeling like going and developing, since it stinks, but then in math we had a quiz, which sucked, and oh gosh, what's my other class.........oh english, I just got done stressing out about a paper that was due yesterday, and now in my history class, I have a paper due, and I don't have the right book to do the paper, so that's gonna be like 40 bucks. That I don't have, and my car payment and cell phone bill are coming in the mail this week. And I don't know why, cuz Jake says it's just me, but me and my mom can honestly, not have a conversation with each other. No matter what, it turns into her lecturing me about money, or school, or work, and for goodness sake, just give me a freakin break, I'm doing the best I can. I don't know what else I can do. And another thing, Jake wants to help me so bad, and make me feel better, and he always wants to know what's wrong, and I honestly don't want to tell him, even though he only cares and wants to help, and I know that, but then I feel like I am bringing him down complaining about the same things over and over again. and I think it makes him feel bad that I won't tell him. Which makes me feel bad, knowing that I'm not telling him what he wants to know. ugh ok, This summer I'm working two jobs, and trying to have a life, and pay for college, and I can't get ahead since my car was fixed, and I don't know, things seriously suck right now, I'm having the hardest time being happy, and when I am, like when I'm with Jake, or when Laina's happy at work and it rubs off, it's always short lived, well, until I'm alone again, or I get home. What's the deal! Honestly! I need this all to stop. I'm getting run down. I want to give up, I'm seriously this () close to giving up, nothing bad like some of you might think, but just sitting home and not doing anything. Just being a bum, and not spending money, and like,giving up at life. I'm just not making it work right. I suck.
and ya know what else, I hate it when you think you have something really really great, and someone else comes along and tells you that it's not. I hate that. or makes it seem stupid, that's an even bigger pet peeve. Gosh darn it! I need to stop!
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swimfan14
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2006 28 March :: 3.15pm
I really don't think things with us are going to work out. Maybe they will but right now I'm having doubts about this whole thing. I'm not doing the whole in between thing again. I really am not looking forward to tonight because I know I'm going to be forced to say things that are really hard for me to say. I really don't have any interest in talking to the kid right now. I would ignore him but it's not going to solve anythinig at all and considering I leave tomorrow, we have some problems we need to fix. We'll see what happens I guess.
I'm going to Dani's grandmas mansion today to stay the night. That should be fun.
I need to go pack though..
I should have learned over the years that good things don't last forever.
So apparently I messed up on my T.
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swimfan14
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2006 27 March :: 9.28pm
I’ll admit it got to me
Hearing your voice
It took all I had to just let you talk
And not pick up where we left off
Every night since your goodbye
I hit my knees and closed my eyes
And I pray that you’d come back
Too many tears washed out that bridge
You wanna cross, but baby, it’s too late for that
Last night would’ve been a different story
But the morning sun must’ve done something for me
Because I bet I’d gone the other way
If you’d called yesterday
If you’d called yesterday
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swimfan14
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2006 26 March :: 11.57pm
Fate fell short this time.
That was one of the hardest things I've ever done. I'm sorry.
I know things are a mess but everything will be alright. I promise.
This place was never the same again
After you came and went
How could you say you meant anything different to anyone
Standing alone on the street with a cigarette on the first night
we met
Look to the past and remember and smile
And maybe tonight I can breath for a while
I'm not in this scene I think I'm falling asleep
But then all that it means is I'll always be dreaming of you.
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jennapie
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2006 25 March :: 6.24pm
I love Jake Mellema, and he is my shining star!!
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swimfan14
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2006 24 March :: 1.02pm
:: Mood: calm
Dear Ashley,
I love you. You're perfect just the way you are, don't ever change for anyone. Not that you would anyway, haha ^_^ You're the best, don't ever forget it. So no matter what, (and you know what I mean) chin up, because someday, you're going to be somebody. Those who couldn't make the time for you now (and you know what I mean) will be kicking themselves when they see who you've become.
You're a star, babe. Let it shine.
<3 M
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