.j.e.s.s.
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2006 30 November :: 11.06am
Don't you ever feel like you are just stuck in a bubble and rolling rolling rolling down the road of life just doing the same dang thing over and over and over and getting absolutely no where.
doesn't anyone ever just want to move away out of the country and just like move away from everything and get away.
........................................my life is boring and i dont like it.
i feel like i am more than what my current life is letting me be.
i feel like i'm never going to get anywhere with what i am doing now.
i need to live more. i need to live more before i settle down and just settle for being a medical assistant or whatever. but i could never go any further with working at fricken menards.
1 screamed |
i am afraid
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sugarjackj
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2006 28 November :: 12.04am
The Modern Rock Station here is talking about me.
Its cool because I'm the only one who knows.
:)
Woo 91.5
i am afraid
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sugarjackj
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2006 28 November :: 12.00am
Its going to be one of those nights again.
No sleep. Too much work.
But I'm taking a break and listening to DMB.
I can't tell you how much I love them.
And there is going to be a studio album comming out in January!!
i am afraid
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spud
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2006 27 November :: 1.52am
man, i don't have time for the internet.
there are lots of things i don't have time for. i shouldn't be making time for the internet at the expense of others. and yet i do.
: )
a fool.
1 screamed |
i am afraid
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 26 November :: 6.52pm
i think i finished my papers.
wow you have no idea how long that took me.
DUMB!!!!!! college is dumb.
i am afraid
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 25 November :: 6.07pm
kids:
dont move out of your parents house
no actually do
go away to college and live in a dorm and use all your parents money so you dont have to worry about anything for like maybe 4 years
but don't move out and try to get your own place and go to school and work and shit. it's not worth it. i want a life. i want a life.
fuck.
i hate my life.
2 screamed |
i am afraid
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 24 November :: 1.30am
ughghghghhgg...
i can't sleep when i'm all alone.
bleh. should i go shopping tomorrow?
i am afraid
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sugarjackj
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2006 23 November :: 8.59pm
They say death comes in threes.
I was waiting for the thrid. Now its here.
And I am so sorry.
i am afraid
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 22 November :: 11.57pm
okay well i wrote the hugest entry about how i love roman. and it got deleted ...
but let's just sum it up shall we.
Romey, I love you babe.
and i love my family too.
i am afraid
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 22 November :: 6.04pm
I am so upset by the whole Michael-Richards-going-crazy-and-being-all-rascist-and-then-going-on-Letterman-and-looking-even-more-stupid-trying-to-apologize thing that I can't even enjoy Seinfeld anymore.
I CAN'T EVEN ENJOY SEINFELD ANYMORE!!!
good goin' Kramer.
i am afraid
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sugarjackj
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2006 21 November :: 3.22am
Eww.
1 screamed |
i am afraid
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tails
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2006 20 November :: 8.44pm
:: Mood: blank
:: Music: Elastica 2;1
The list is getting longer but the base is getting stronger
My car is fixed.
Cellphone Still Lost.
Still owe the bank money.
Still in debt with credit cards
Still working one shitty job
Still Living at my dads house.
Still alone.
(Ive got some problems to work on)
(but at least one of them is solved)
1 screamed |
i am afraid
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sugarjackj
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2006 19 November :: 9.07pm
Next Semester..
German I
Sight Singing & Ear training II
Music Theory II
Piano II
Women's Chorus OR Concert Choir
English I
Recital II
Studio II
Voice Lesson
V.A.R.
Fuck four classes! lol.
Anyway, Mozart's Requiem was almost flawless. It went so smoothly.
And I sing in front of my 100 level jury In December. Also exciting.
Move out of my stinky dorm in December.
At least there is SOMETHING to look forward to.
i am afraid
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spud
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2006 18 November :: 10.27pm
:: Mood: kopfschmerzen
:: Music: the ed palermo big band - take your clothes off when you dance
man, i really haven't been able to focus at all lately. hopefully that will change after thanksgiving break when i've had some time off.
i really need to figure out how i work, so then i can make it happen.
i'm still hemming hawing about the party. but things are beginning to lean that way, as the evening transpires.
4 screamed |
i am afraid
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.j.e.s.s.
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2006 18 November :: 6.25pm
:: Mood: confused
help
okay seriously. why cant i do my homework. i just wont allow myself to do it. i seriously wont. what is wrong with me?
and it's not just this.
i can't
do
anything.
ugh. but hey i already knew that so whatevv. ............................ i knew i'd be like this. i knew it. is it wrong that i just want to get married and have kids. it's not that i dont ever want to get an education or have a job. i'm smart. and i like feeling like i'm good at a job or whatever but i just dont .............want that...?? i just want to be a mom. that's so bad! no it's not. it's not bad. it's not bad that i want a family and that i want to be a great mom and have a great family why is that wrong? that's not wrong? but yet i dont want all that SO YOUNG. i dont want all that right now . but i just dont enjoy .................. i dont enjoy like ...working for this undefinable goal that i'm supposed to have since i have a scholarship and blah blah blah but every one says that medical assisting is not enough. well i'm sorry, i'm not striving for this goal to become a doctor or pharmacist or biochemical engineer or whatev. i just dont ... want that
so is something wrong with me because i feel like that? explain it to me.
3 screamed |
i am afraid
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