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brandnew26
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::
2005 19 September :: 12.16am
:: Mood: confused
:: Music: explosions in the sky - your hand in mine
So I'm having one of those insane, can't sleep, too many thoughts nights. I told myself that I wasn't going to care anymore, because it never seemed like she cared and that I was just boring her. Why do I find the details to this after the fact? Why do I find out that maybe, in some way she actually liked me? Also, why does this shit keep happening? Oh well, I can't do anything about it now. Time and fate will tell what happens in this chapter of history. I just keep thinking, what could I have done to help myself with this, and what if everything worked out? What would that be like, and if so, how long till it does?
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 18 September :: 9.45pm
:: Mood: pissed off
:: Music: amber pacific - gone so young
people are going to die now. just because. probably because i'm pissed. randomly i will pick them and kill them. because i have the best timing in the world with things. fuck. so not cool.
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 4 September :: 9.43pm
:: Mood: sick
:: Music: pick an exit - for the road
I am currently sick, and it does suck. Its been a while since I've been this sick. So I am attempting to get well as quickly as possible, because I don't want to miss any class when classes start back on Tuesday. So yesterday was devoted to getting better and watching college football. My beloved Fighting Irish are looking great this year under Charlie Weis. The new offense is amazing, and the defense is even looking better. Now I am going, because I now require 600 more milligrams of Advil, as well as rest.
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 28 August :: 8.50am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: hellogoodbye - call and return
so why am i awake right now? i left mass early to come home and pick up my brother, and i'm waiting for him, so i'm writing in here. fuck coach and his sunday practice, agnostic/athiest prick. i know agnostic people that don't pull this shit and still respect people who do. i really hope he dies. so i'm sitting here in a dress shirt, tie, dress pants and my usual shoes for school. aroused? ha. i'm going.
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 27 August :: 11.50pm
:: Mood: annoyed
:: Music: explosions in the sky - time stops
so i'm going to rant a lot in this entry, because i can do that.
i'm sick of dealing with stupid people.
i'm sick of dealing with stupid people who bring up past events.
i am now thinking how much of a waste of time this is. but oh well. things are going to change. a year from now, i'll be in college. most likely with jeff at aquinas. what's interesting is how quickly the mind can can and be made to forget things. feelings can be forgotten. its is amazing what the mind is capable of.
so two new explosions in the sky cds coming out. should be amazing, like always. but for now, i'm tired, and have to be at metro beach by 9:30 tomorrow morning. should be interesting to see if i get yelled at tomorrow also for whatever reasons. i'm watching the end of Apollo 13. i really like this movie. for now, goodnight.
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 24 August :: 8.34pm
ChiefofSheep1: I'm always lonely
ChiefofSheep1: I seem to be getting used to it
ChiefofSheep1: which scares me
ChiefofSheep1: but yes I am
i am jacks sn 26: yeah, i usually am too
ChiefofSheep1: we are men devoted to our trade
ChiefofSheep1: modern day cowboys
ChiefofSheep1: we don't have the time for relationships
ChiefofSheep1: we take women in whatever town we happen to be passing through, and leave with the sun, room for no ties
i am jacks sn 26: yes
i am jacks sn 26: if we were tied down in a relationship, we could not do our work
ChiefofSheep1: for fear for the safety of our loved ones
i am jacks sn 26: yes
i am jacks sn 26: we deal with things that the average person would run away from
ChiefofSheep1: yeah
ChiefofSheep1: we show no fear
ChiefofSheep1: no love
ChiefofSheep1: no mercy
i am jacks sn 26: toward our enemy
i am jacks sn 26: mercy to those we help
ChiefofSheep1: or anyone around us
ChiefofSheep1: we'll help you, but we have little time
ChiefofSheep1: so back off and let us work
i am jacks sn 26: yes
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 24 August :: 7.37pm
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brandnew26
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::
2005 23 August :: 8.34pm
:: Mood: amused
:: Music: Hello Nurse - My Ally
hi, i'm eric. i don't think we got off on the right foot(or left), or were properly intoduced. you don't really need to know much about me, because i'm not that interesting. I'm boring, like his songs. But I do like you, which seems to be irrelevent, because you show no interest, which is fine then. So, you will not hear from me, because I seem to bother you.
So, farewell, goodbye.
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 21 August :: 7.11pm
saving your 8 year old cousin who you barely know and rarely see from yellow-jackets is not worth the three stings from said insect.
P.S. Those little bastards pack a punch in that little stinger they got
P.P.S. I still am better than every single on of you
P.P.P.S. I really mean it
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 19 August :: 10.25pm
:: Mood: working
:: Music: hellogoodbye - call and return
so now i'm back to making music on my computer. its fun, but i don't have much money anymore. ha, oh well. my day was completely devoted to trying to beat geist and deconstructing hellogoodbye's dear jamie. so far i have 2 of the parts laid into track. there are two seperate piano/keyboard/synth lines going in the beginning. i'm trying to find the right set of drums that they use for the bass line. you probably have no idea what i'm saying, nor do you care. actually, i have no idea why you are reading this anyway. so i now own all the freshmen in cross-country. coach put me in charge of them, big mistake. so now i have my little sheep/minions to do me and jeff's work. small, young, feeble minds are so easily corrupted and reprogrammed. but for now i require some sleep.
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 18 August :: 10.38pm
Sunrise Goodbyes
Amidst a smile the setting sun
Red sequined dress that could kill anyone
The music moves you like good poetry
I wish I lacked this anonymity
It strikes me funny when you mouth the words
to "Am I Wrong" a song I've only heard
while sipping whiskey living out a lie
a perfect portrait hosting you and I
A made up romance, my soliloquy will read
I know I'm lost again, my timing's off again
because something lacks in your passing eyes
It's lust and libido
why give up this opportunity?
Give it a go and maybe you will see
so take a chance it'll be alright
and that's all you've got to go on
You dance around my head throughout the day
a want, a wish, a will to have my way
and when I fumble over words you smile
you'll kiss my cheek and say, "I like your style."
Dream a dream of our life story
I will tell it over and again
I'll tell the world just how you got that
got that perfect smile I can't withstand
Let me kiss your index finger
I'll point out how you've made me crazy
I know I'd do it all the same way
I'd do it all the same
A made up romance, my soliloquy will read
I know I'm lost again, my timing's off again
because something lacks in your passing eyes
It's lust and libido
why give up this opportunity?
Give it a go and maybe you will see
so take a chance it'll be alright
and that's all you've got to go on
Dream a dream of our life story
I will tell it over and again
I'll tell the world just how you got that
Let me kiss your index finger
I'll point out how you've made me crazy
I know I'd do it all the same way
A made up romance, my soliloquy will read
I know I'm lost again, my timing's off again
because something lacks in your passing eyes
It's lust and libido
why give up this opportunity?
Give it a go and maybe you will see
so take a chance it'll be alright
and that's all you've got to go on
Why give up this opportunity?
If I can't be near you then I'd rather be
in hell forever I'll think of you
so just give me chances to go on
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 18 August :: 3.11pm
Polygraph, right now!
Fate is an elegant, cold-hearted whore
She loves salting my wounds, yeah
She enjoys nothing more
I bleed confidence
From deep within my guts now
I'm the king of this pity party
With my jewel encrested crown
I wanna tear apart your room
To see if what you say is true
Darling don't you lie, lie to me
I wanna break into your heart
To see why you want us apart
Oh, scared to death to find out what you think of me
Fate is an elegant, cold-hearted whore
She loves salting my wounds, yeah
She enjoys nothing more
I bleed confidence
From deep within my guts now
I'm the king of this pity party
With my jewel encrested crown
According to you, we don't click
That's a blatent lie, and you know it
Angel, what are you hiding from me
If there is truly not a secret lunchbreak
Working late, lover oh
Then I will die but at least that I'll be free
Fate is an elegant, cold-hearted whore
She loves salting my wounds, yeah
She enjoys nothing more
I bleed confidence
From deep within my guts now
I'm the king of this pity party
With my jewel encrested crown
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 18 August :: 2.41pm
First Semester
Day 1
Mod 1-2 - Religion 4 Perrin
Mod 3-4 - US History After 1945 Nicoloff
Mod 5-8 - Empty
Mod 9-10 - Goverment Ritchie
Mod 11-12 - AP English Kirck
Mod 13-14 - Intergrated Math Gagnon
Mod 15-16 - Empty
Day 2
Mod 1-2 - Empty
Mod 3-4 - Intergrated Math Gagnon
Mod 5-6 - Goverment Ritche
Mod 7-8 - Photo 3 Littlejohn
Mod 9-10 - US History After 1945 Nicoloff
Mod 11-12 Empty
Mod 13-14 AP English Kirck
Mod 15-16 Empty
1 |
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 12 August :: 6.57pm
Your Life: The Soundtrack | Created by aiko and taken 33489 times on bzoink! | | Opening credits | Say Anything - Yellow Cat/Red Cat | | Waking up | Zella Mayzell - Her Feet Go Down to Death | | Average day | hellogoodbye - Two Weeks In Hawaii | | First date | Cowalker - Communion | | Falling in love | Elliott Smith - Waltz #2 | | Love scene | Waiting For Autumn - Memories of You (Yellow) | | Fight scene | Every Time I Die - Guitared And Feathered | | Breaking up | The Spill Canvas - Polygraph, Right Now! | | Getting back together | Gatsby's American Dream - A Minifesto Of Tangible Wealth | | Secret love | Michael Buble - Moondance | | Life's okay | Larger Than Life - This Day And Age | | Mental breakdown | Norma Jean - Memphis Will Be Laid to Waste | | Driving | Saves The Day - Shoulder To The Wheel | | Learning a lesson | The Decemberists - Red Right Ankle | | Deep thought | Built To Spill - Car | | Flashback | Glassjaw - Hidden Track | | Partying | Relient K - Be My Escape | | Happy dance | Houston Calls - Sunrise Goodbyes | | Regreting | I, Heart - Friday Nights New Color | | Long night alone | Zella Mayzell - Straight Ahead At The End Of The Court | | Death scene | Explosions In The Sky - A Poor Man's Memory | | Closing credits | Her Space Holiday - My Girlfriend's Boyfriend | Create a Survey | Search Surveys | Go to bzoink! |
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 8 August :: 5.46am
:: Mood: awake
:: Music: houston calls - amtrak is for lovers
so i write to you, from my house, because i am leaving now. so being up at 4:30 really isn't cool when you went to sleep at 1. i don't get to sleep till night, because i'm splitting the driving with my dad, who also had around the same amount of sleep with me, great way to start out the week. so, i may miss some of you, slightly. so, goodbye. i shall see you thursday.
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 7 August :: 6.49pm
here's a question that needs to be answered.
do i look like jude law or do i not look like jude law?
i'm thinking the latter. please tell me what you think/your opinion.
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 7 August :: 5.56pm
1.) How big is your music file on your computer?
12.3 Gigs
2.) The song you are listening to right now
The Apparatus of Heaven - The Lost Trails Of Light
3.) A CD you recently bought
A Collection Of Short Stories
4.) 5 songs you always listen to or that have sentimental value to you
Explosions In The Sky - Your Hand In Mine
Say Anything - A Walk Through Hell
Zella Mayzell - Straight Ahead At The End Of The Court
Godspeed You! Black Emperor - East Hastings
Explosions In The Sky - Have You Passed Through This Night
5.) 5 people you will pass the baton to:
Whoever wants to
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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2005 4 August :: 12.33pm
I want to be anointed
I want to be inspired
I want to hear voices
I want to breathe fire
If I could be a hero
If I could be a saint
I want to rise above this
I want my past erased
I really want to decide to grow up
And stop being a little boy
I want to act in true chivalry
I want to see that it's a choice
I'm a supporter of all I'm against
Quietly resting in my role
Keep telling myself this
Telling myself this
Will never take a toll
I've misplaced my
Replaced my moral code
It's built a stronghold inside of me
Running off gas fumes and greedy intent
Being nothing to me can't feel good
Where do you get your standards from
I like to act like I'm better than
Better than you better than some
But the truth is inside it kills me
To be a part of the ebb and flow
Of something so detrimental
So consequential
It only goes to show
I'm just as weak
As I am dumb
And I don't care
If they don't know it's wrong
Ignorance is bliss and I'm happiest with my
Conscience all but gone (clear my history now)
It's only natural you're only gonna give in you're only gonna give in again
You know it's not it's not fatal you know you want to give in you know you want to give in again
My God please take this
I can't fight it now
Without you
I fall prey
To my own sense of shame
My God take this
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 2 August :: 9.30pm
:: Mood: sore
:: Music: houston calls - a line in the sand
i hate practice, i hate running. i saw jeff and ralph today, for like 5 minutes. as well as eddie, and cupcake. stewart warned me about asking for my schedule. oh well. i want to see it though. its too hot to run. jack is out of town for like two weeks. i'm going out with joel tonight. probably be home around 1:30-2. ha, and i'm already dead tired. should be a shit load of fun, as it always is. driving home after that should be interesting.
1 |
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 26 July :: 10.49pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: the decemberists - clementine
okay, so i'm attempting to update. i'm dead tired right now. i have to be on the road to grosse pointe by 7:45 to get my knee x-rayed and all that fun stuff because apparently i hit it pretty damn good. in other news, my hand is bruised from punching a kid in the head. so all you hardcore, and "gangstas", you are not cool, you do not really get into fights, you do not carry "nines" and just because you wear all black you are not "hxc". i listen to the music, you don't see me trying to act all scene. okay, so the story behind the punching. for some reason some i pissed off some kid in my sub, so i get hit to the ground, and i come up swinging. quick fighting ensues. he punches me in the head, which still really hurts like hell. so i punched him so hard that my hand is now bruised. so i ran after landing that good punch. i was afraid his friend's were going to come and then i'd get my ass gang beaten. so even though my body is usually in some sort of injury, i still manage to live every day. unless its broken or bleeding a lot, then its okay. yeah. well i'm tired so i'm going to sleep.
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 24 July :: 11.04pm
:: Mood: exhausted
:: Music: Her Space Holiday - The Luxury Of Loneliness
i wrote this about a year ago, while listening to a lot of her space holiday and saves the day.
leaves, trees, colors, park benches, sweaters, hugs, holding each other, crisp days, warm together, college football, apples, cinammon, nutmeg, pumpkins, orange, red, yellow, black, grey, rain, cold, blankets, fireplaces, long drives in my car, notebooks, cameras, orchards.
homecoming dances and new romances
first kisses and best wishes
long drives home and hours on the phone
ups + downs and time spent along
random pictures and quiet whispers
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 24 July :: 1.54pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: Houston Calls - Amtrack Is For Lovers
advice for the day: don't go running today
i feel like shit now, my run today really took it all out of me. so i got up at 6 this morning. saw a pretty amazing sunrise from my patio. [insert saves the day song here]. so i watched the end of the tour de france, as i always have. kinda sad to see the end of it, more sad to see armstrong retire from it. it was a pretty crazy storm this morning. its hot as hell now. and i have just eaten a whole large pizza. i feel full and i don't really want to do anything now. i hit my knee coming down the stairs last night, and running on it today seemed to make it hurt a lot more. so today i'm thinking about just sitting on my couch with ice on it, read my books and maybe watch some movies.
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 23 July :: 12.09am
:: Music: finch - stay with me
so i pretty much saw the coolest, most interesting thing ever tonight. i was driving home from erinn's tonight. on 22 mile at around garfield there are a few green houses. so they are dark, and there is a full moon illuminating the tops of them. it was so cool looking, just these sillouettes illuminated by the moon. its hard to explain, but it was really neat looking. yeah, i'm tired so i'll write more tomorrow.
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 16 July :: 12.05am
Tepes
impaler: impaled; exsanguinated; ashes cast out to sea. as early morning comes, the pyre winds down and lights die out but the sun doesn't rise above the shore. its stalling amber rays (as memory would serve the spectators' eyes) ebbed and flowed, in- and exhaled.
all in all, the price you'll pay isn't worth the cost. it's so sickening seeing you crawl, but now we're complete.
a starboard ray, reborn, connects the ends of the world. the former flicks its tongue; exchanges soot for blood, sediment for flesh,
entropy for existence.
where's the mask to match the rest? the curtains draw closed, the lights fade in and the stage divorces the man from the cast. and, though they've barely scratched the surface of you, i've always understood, as you know me.
we are the choices we make.
to whom it may concern,
you've changed, you've turned. your fangs may have dulled, but i know how they were. you stole a part of mine, i stole a part of yours. is there some sort of grand design in your little world or do you just let it all randomly unwind? the gears don't turn, but i see how they run. i stole a part of yours and you stole a part of mine, but that still doesn't make this all alright.
i'm sorry.
failed the crash test
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brandnew26
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::
2005 13 July :: 11.55pm
Every Breath You Take
Every breath you take
And every move you make
Every bond you break,
Every step you take
I'll be watching you
Every single day
And every word you say
Every game you play,
Every night you stay
I'll be watching you
Oh, can't you see
You belong to me?
My poor heart aches
With every step you take
Every move you make
Every vow you break
Every smile you fake,
Every claim you stake
I'll be watching you
Since you've gone I've been lost without a trace
I dream at night, I can only see your face
I look around, but it's you I can't replace
I feel so cold, and I long for your embrace
I keep crying baby, baby please
Oh, can't you see
You belong to me?
How my poor heart aches
With every step you take
Every move you make
Every vow you break
Every smile you fake,
Every claim you stake
I'll be watching you
Every move you make,
Every step you take
I'll be watching you
Every move you make,
Every step you take
I'll be watching you
Every breath you take
Every move you make
Every bone you break
Every step you take
Every single day
Every word you say
Every game you play
Every night you stay
Every move you make
Every heart you break
Every smile you fake
Every thing you stake
Every breath you take
Every move you make
Every bond you break
Every step you take
3 |
failed the crash test
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